Spongebob's Boyfriend - Yaoi

BY : TristyPixie
Category: +S through Z > SpongeBob SquarePants
Dragon prints: 1739
Disclaimer: I don't own Spongebob Squarepants; this fanfiction was written purely for fun and not for money.

In the underwater summer, it appeared to be the late afternoon and Squidward had just finished pouring hot tea into his cup. All Squidward really wanted was a quiet and peaceful afternoon and absolutely no fuss from his two irritating neighbours.

“Ahh, what a relaxing afternoon,” mumbled Squidward whilst sipping a cup of freshly brewed coral tea. “I think I’ll sit outside today - I mean, nothing can go wrong since I’m no longer at The Krappy Krab.”

Opening the front door, Squidward glanced at his surroundings with a grin on his slimy rims. Squidward laughed nasally, remembering that his yellow neighbour that shall not be named just so happened to be at work today.

“No Spongebob - I’m all alone out here on this fabulous day.”

Taking out his zero gravity recliner, Squidward proceeded to set the outdoor chair on the sand as Squidward then laid down. He made sure he took out his cup of tea as well, and he went on to sip the hot drink once again. Squidward finally began to settle into his relaxing recliner on this tranquil day.

“Finally, a peaceful day all to myself,” laughed Squidward once again.

Repeating his words, Squidward spoke loudly enough for a starfish under a rock to hear. Unexpectedly, albeit not surprisingly, a mind-numbingly harsh voice erupted from the rock beside Squidward’s house.

Patrick kicked up a rumpus, “Can you keep it down, Squidward? I’m trying to play with my pet rock and all we can hear is your inflated ego!”

After that yell, Squidward was hit in the head with Patrick’s pet rock.

“Ouch,” shrieked Squidward “get your pet rock off my front lawn!”

“What are you talking about, Squidward? I don’t even have a pet rock!” deluded Patrick.

As Squidward threw the stupid pet rock back Patrick’s way, Patrick turned around and went back under his rock without a thought on his mind.

“Stupid Patrick and his silly rock pet!” Squidward laughed as he rubbed the aching bump on the back of his head, “I wonder how Spongebob is doing at The Krappy Krab without me. I wonder if Spongebob is doing my job as well, or if that cheapskate Mr Krappy Krabs is actually working for once or stealing his own money out of the cash register.”


Glancing at the horizon whilst sipping the last of his tea, Squidward noticed Spongebob returning home from work.

“Six o’clock already? It looks like I have to go back inside now,” mumbled Squidward.

The grumpy squid rose to his feet and folded the recliner, carrying it under his arm. However, the moment Squidward set foot indoors, Spongebob rushed over to him with tears falling from his eyes.

“I heard about you getting fired from work, Squidward! Is it true? Oh, is it true?!” Spongebob wept and wept as he grabbed the collar of Squidward’s brown shirt. “I can’t believe it! I don’t want you to leave The Krusty Krab; you’re my best friend!”

Squidward’s eyes grew wide at that over-dramatic episode, and he immediately pushed Spongebob away from him.

“What are you doing? I’m glad I got fired from The Krappy Krab. I get to have a whole day to myself WITHOUT YOU!”

“But Squidward, I can’t look at your handsome face anymore when I take your orders,” cried Spongebob. Spongebob grabbed hold of Squidward’s arm tentacles desperately, “I’m never letting go of you, Squidward; you’re my best friend.”

Squidward bleated, “Get off of me, Spongebob; I HATE YOU!” 

“I’ll only let you go of you if you,” gulped Spongebob with a sudden belt of laughter “come to my SLEEPOVER !”

“Oh my,” groaned Squidward “If it gets you out of my life for good I guess I’ll have to endure this miserable night of my life.”

 Yippee !” Spongebob cheered as he beamed from ear-to-ear “I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, Squidward; it’ll be so much fun with just the two of us!”

Irritated by the loud high-pitched voice, an annoyed starfish rose from beneath his rock. A sudden change of expression painted Patrick’s face from annoyed to sad, as he noticed his yellow best friend walking back home with Squidward.

Patrick assumed, “Spongebob forgot about me!”


Off to a wonderful night in Spongebob’s view, the yellow sponge went on to give Squidward a shoulder massage. Squidward was sat on the settee and appeared to be watching a scary movie on the television screen.

Spongebob knew just how much Squidward loved shoulder massages.

“Oh yeah, that hits the spot,” mumbled Squidward. He closed his eyes for a moment, just giving in to the pleasure of this massage.

Unfortunately, this shoulder massage just had to stop when Spongebob forgot about the special ingredient of this sleepover. 

Spongebob burst, “Oh no, I forgot to make brownies!”

“Meow,” groaned Gary. 

“I never forgot to feed you, Gary. Let’s go to the kitchen!”

“I never forgot I was at Spongebob’s house,” grumbled Squidward.

A delightful smell was coming from the kitchen as Spongebob came out dancing with a tray of warm brownies in his hands. Spongebob wanted to make this sleepover extra special for his squid friend.

“Here are the brownies I promised, Squidward,” chimed Spongebob as he set the tray of goodies down on the end table beside the sofa.

“Gee, thank you, Spongebob,” smiled Squidward as he went on to take a brownie from the tray. With this kind gesture, Squidward’s opinion on Spongebob heightened. “I didn’t know you could be so attentive,” mentioned Squidward.

“Thank you, Squidward; I just knew you would love these brownies,” answered Spongebob. The yellow sponge sat beside Squidward, leaving absolutely no breath of fresh air between them. Spongebob snuggled up to Squidward, just watching him eat the brownie with a cheeky smile on his face.

Squidward just had to question, “What? Did you put something in these brownies?” 

“Just my love, Squidward.”

“These brownies better not be poisoned, Spongebob,” stated Squidward as he took a bite out of this brownie. His frown turned into a wide beam when he tasted the love from within this one brownie, just one bite made Squidward’s dormant feelings true. “This brownie is delicious, Spongebob!”

Enjoying the deluxe taste of this one brownie, Squidward went on to engulf the entire tray of these freshly-baked brownies. Not satisfied with just one homemade brownie, Squidward couldn’t control himself. 

“So warm and gooey like grandma’s homebaked cookies,” reminisced Squidward. “I just love these brownies, Spongebob!”

“That’s good, Squidward; I whipped up an extra batch of brownies just in case you wanted some more,” harmonised Spongebob as he pulled out a tray from behind his back.

There they were - another batch of warm and gooey brownies!

“Thanks so much, Spongebob,” excitedly reprised Squidward whilst his mouth hoovered up the next batch of brownies.

Spongebob yawned whilst looking at his wristwatch, “Are you getting tired, Squidward? It’s getting late already!”


Upstairs in Spongebob’s bedroom, Gary followed the two up the staircase as he slithered his way onto the newspaper down by Spongebob’s bed. The alarm was on an end table beside Spongebob’s bed, too, albeit Spongebob switched off the alarm so it wouldn’t wake the two in the morning. 

Spongebob asked, “Would you like to sleep in my bed, Squidward?”

“What, with you?”

“I don’t mind sleeping on the newspaper with Gary,” replied Spongebob “but if you insist, I’d love to sleep with you tonight!”

Squidward huffed, “Oh gee, really?”

A happy Spongebob climbed into bed and patted the opposite side of the bed softly, “come on Squidward; let’s have a funtastic bedtime.”

“Fine,” Squidward sallied forth. 

As Spongebob settled into bed, the yellow sponge quickly fell into a deep sleep. With Squidward laying beside him, Spongebob smiled fondly in his sleep.

Struggling to sleep, Squidward peered over his tentacle and heard Spongebob snoring wildly. Squidward mused, “Spongebob has a certain cuteness to him when he sleeps.”

Grumble! Squidward heard a faint sound coming from outside, but he merely assumed that was just Spongebob talking in his sleep. With Spongebob on his side, without a second thought in mind, Squidward kissed Spongebob goodnight. Afterwards, Squidward fell asleep as deeply as the yellow sponge.

As soon as Squidward fell into a deep slumber, the yellow sponge immediately woke up and kissed Squidward fondly on the mouth.

“Good night, Squidward,” giggled Spongebob. 

During the time Spongebob went back to sleep, the yellow sponge went on to snuggle Squidward.

All this snuggling caused Squidward to open up one eye, and what caught his attention was nothing more than a pink starfish outside the window.

“Oh look, a big pink buffoon is staring at us through the window,” mentioned Squidward. With a long tentacle, an annoyed Squidward pulled the blind down to cover the window glass. Luckily, no buffoon was looking through the blind as well.

This big pink buffoon happened to be Patrick, and he sighed the moment the blind came down. “I love brownies and bedtime cuddles, too. I think Spongebob hates me,” cried Patrick.

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