Chipmunk Development

Category: +1 through F > Alvin & The Chipmunks
Dragon prints: 1315
Disclaimer: I do not own Alvin and the Chipmunks, and I make no money from writing about it.

Chapter 1

Alvin let himself into the Chipettes' treehouse and managed to climb the ladder to the bedroom with three video cassettes under his arm. He had an easier time ascending the stairs to the upper storey, where he found Brittany sitting on the couch with root beer on ice and newly lit candles on the table beside her. When she saw Alvin, she tossed the still smoking match carelessly aside and jumped to her feet.

'Darling!' she said, rushing to meet him and flinging her arms around his neck.

'Hi, Brittany,' said Alvin, returning the embrace with his free arm.

Brittany took a step back and looked at his other arm. 'Ooh, new videos. What'd you get?'

'I don't know if these are any good,' Alvin said apologetically, handing the videos to her. 'I tried to get at least one that we'd both enjoy, but maybe these are more to my taste.'

Brittany looked at the titles in turn: The Cable Guy, From Dusk till Dawn and Scream.

'They're fine,' said Brittany. 'I like Jim Carrey because he is funny, and I've heard that this vampire thing is more like adrenaline-fuelled fun than really scary. But I don't know if I want to watch this one,' she added, holding up Scream.

'Why not?' said Alvin.

'Because what if it's spooky?'

'That's okay – I'm here to protect you. If you get scared, you can just hold onto me.'

'Well,' Brittany giggled as Alvin slipped his arms around her waist and began planting kisses on her neck, 'that actually sounds really nice. Okay, what the hell – we'll watch Scream.'

'Are you sure?' said Alvin. 'I don't want to pressure you.'

'Damn right I'm sure,' said Brittany. 'I really want you to protect me from the scary movie, Alvin.'

She smiled at him, and he grinned back. They kissed deeply for a minute or two, then Brittany gave Alvin a push towards the couch and went to put the video into the VCR. Within minutes, she was on the couch beside Alvin, clinging to his pecs and shrieking in horror as Drew Barrymore was brutally stabbed to death by an unknown assailant.

For the rest of the film's run-time, the pair alternated between swigging root beer and clinging to each other as more and more characters met their bloody end. By the time the closing credits rolled, their limbs were intertwined and they were both breathing heavily.

'You're shaking,' Alvin whispered.

'Yes,' Brittany whispered back.

'That scary, huh?'


As she said this, Brittany heard Alvin's heart rate increase beneath her ear. She lifted her head from his chest and their eyes met. A moment later, Brittany stopped the video, turned off the TV and climbed onto Alvin's lap. With her arms around his neck and his around her waist, they kissed passionately, Alvin shaking off his hat when it started to get in their way. After a while, he reached underneath Brittany's skirt and began caressing her thighs and buttocks, keeping his hands on top of her undergarments. Brittany pulled out of their kiss, smiling, and said, 'Y'know, not long after those people in the movie did their “on top of the clothes stuff”, he tried to kill her.'

'Ah, but I'm protecting you, remember?' said Alvin. As he spoke, he reached his right hand up to her neck and began caressing her throat with the tips of his fingers.

'Mmm,' said Brittany. 'And you're doing such a great job, you deserve a reward.'

So saying, she hurriedly loosened her clothing and then took Alvin's right hand in both of hers. She guided it up underneath her top until it was cupping her left breast, then sighed appreciatively as he began massaging it and gently pinching her nipple between his forefinger and thumb.

'That feels good, Alvin,' she breathed.

'For me too, babe,' he said hoarsely.

'Mmm, I can tell.' She slid her hands down his torso until they found where his erect penis was straining at his clothing. As he sucked in his breath, she said, 'I don't guess I'd better let you go home like this, had I?'

'Whatever you want...' breathed Alvin.

'Shall we take it out?' said Brittany.

Alvin nodded mutely, staring at her. His hand ceased movement on her breast, but he kept hold of it as she freed his cock from the confines of his clothing and a shiny ribbon of pre-cum dribbled into the palm of her hand. Smiling, she spread this down the length of Alvin's rigid shaft, watching as his eyes slid shut and his head fell back in ecstasy. With his right hand, he carried on massaging her breast, while with his left he lovingly caressed Brittany's arm as it worked on his pleasure.

'Am I doing it right?' Brittany asked as she moved her hand repeatedly from his balls to the head of his penis.

'Oh, yeah.' He opened his eyes and smiled at her, then withdrew his hand from inside her top and cupped her face in his palms. 'Kiss me.'

'Okay, baby,' Brittany smiled, leaning forward a little, and she kissed him and masturbated him until his head lolled onto the couch back and he gasped, 'I'm about there, babe.'

Brittany watched Alvin's face – his eyes screwed shut, his mouth open and crying out in ecstasy – as several reams of cum erupted from the tip of his twitching cock and splashed onto both her chin and his. When it was over, he sank deeper into the couch and opened his eyes to smile languidly up at her. She smiled back, and they exchanged a distinctly salty kiss; then, quite suddenly, she climbed down from his lap and wandered off.

'Hey, where's my post-coital embrace?' Alvin called after her, as he started tucking himself back into his clothes.

'The North Pole!' Brittany called back jokingly from the kitchen. A moment later, she reappeared holding a roll of kitchen paper, took a sheet herself and then offered the roll to Alvin. 'I just thought we'd better get cleaned up, babe. You don't want to go home like that either. And neither do I!'

'Thank you, Brittany, that was amazing,' said Alvin, as he wiped the jizz off his chin and then started dabbing at his clothes. 'Is there anything you'd like me to do for you in return?'

'I liked what you did earlier,' said Brittany, picking up his hat from behind the couch. They laughed as she placed it back on his head, then she climbed into his arms and said, 'Alvin, I want to go all the way with you.'

'Oh, wow, you do?'

'Yes, darling, but we can't this time. I mean, I'd really like it if we could do it right now... I mean, if we could've gone on to do that instead of what just happened...'

'Or as well,' Alvin grinned.

'Yes, all right,' Brittany tittered, then went on seriously, 'but I want to be smart about it. You know?'

'Yeah, I know,' said Alvin. 'I do too. Of course I do. I mean... I want it to be perfect.'

'So do I.'

'And being smart... I wish it was easier. I mean, all that stuff isn't really designed for... for us, is it?'

'No, it's not,' said Brittany. 'But look, don't you worry about it. I'll see if I can... sort out something.'

'Well,' said Alvin, 'if you need me to do anything, or... or find anything...'

'I'll let you know.'

'Okay, so... you were talking about going home, weren't you? I guess it's time we did.'

'Hold on,' said Brittany, keeping hold of Alvin as he made to stand up. Then she found the VCR remote control hidden among the cushions, handed it to him and said, 'Be kind, rewind.'

When Alvin arrived home, he headed for the kitchen, where he found Theodore preparing a meal.

'Hi, Alvin,' said Theodore. 'I didn't know if you'd be back in time for dinner, but you're the first one to show up. Isn't that funny?'

'Sounds more annoying for you than funny,' said Alvin.

'Oh, I don't mind.'

'Well, I'm hungry.'

'Have a bread stick,' said Theodore, indicating a bowl on the worktop. 'They only came out of the oven a minute ago.'

'Thanks, Theodore,' said Alvin, helping himself. He broke the breadstick in half and began nibbling on it. 'So where did the others go?'

'Oh, they're in the house,' said Theodore. 'Dave's working on a song and Simon's in the basement building a model or something. Don't ask me what – he doesn't seem to want to talk about it.'

'Um... Theodore...' said Alvin, feeling a pang of guilt as he thought about his own secrets. 'I'm sorry if the three of us haven't been spending much time together lately.'

'That's okay, Alvin,' Theodore said blithely. 'I got my own stuff going on.'

'Oh, you do?'

'Sure I do. We all do. But that doesn't make us any less close, does it?'

'Of course not,' said Alvin, smiling. 'You want me to see if I can get the others to come to dinner?'

'Yes please,' said Theodore, so Alvin went off in search of Simon and Dave.

That night, Alvin dreamt of the treehouse and of Brittany. He climbed the ladder to the bedroom, where Brittany was lying naked on her bed and holding her arms out to him. He found that he too was suddenly naked, and he entered her pretty much straight away. Very soon, he was ejaculating into her dream pussy, as well as into his very tangible pyjama trousers.

In the dream, Brittany had loved it as much as Alvin did, and he had felt perfectly satisfied with his performance; in wakefulness, however, he reflected that she would certainly want there to be more to it and, really, he did as well. He was lying there, worrying about his lack of knowledge, when Theodore started gingerly peeling off his pyjama trousers and saying, 'Well, these are gonna have to go straight in the laundry.'

Alvin smiled and looked over at him. 'You too, huh?'

'Yeah,' said Theodore. 'You, um... want to give me anything for the machine, Alvin?'

'Sure,' said Alvin, getting out of bed and stripping off. He threw his pyjama trousers, marked on the crotch and right leg with dried semen, to Theodore. 'Thanks, Theodore.'

'How about you, Simon?' asked Theodore.

'We know it happens to all of us,' said Simon, who was placing his neatly folded pyjamas under his pillow. 'There's no need to broadcast about it.'

'Hey,' said Alvin, 'what was that for? He was only offering to do you a favour.'

'It's fine, Alvin,' Theodore said cheerfully. 'I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable, Simon.'

'That's okay, Theodore,' said Simon. 'You didn't.'

'There's no need to apologise to him, Theodore,' said Alvin. Then, to Simon, he said, 'Since when has anybody had a problem with us talking about that stuff in the privacy of our own room?'

'Nobody has a problem with it,' said Simon. 'But perhaps we should agree on a new rule that we only enter such conversations voluntarily. Nobody is to ask.'

'Fine by me,' said Theodore, who had already got dressed and was now bundling his own pyjama trousers and Alvin's into his arms.

'Then why were you complaining about us “broadcasting”?' Alvin demanded.

'I wasn't,' said Simon. 'I only meant that I didn't want to share that information with you right now.'

'Then why did Theodore feel the need to apologise?'

'Theodore can tell me himself if I inadvertently offended him.'

'But he won't,' said Alvin. 'He's too polite.'

'Well, there's an easy way to settle this,' said Simon, and he looked past Alvin to Theodore's bed. 'Theodore, do you –?'

He stopped abruptly. Alvin turned round and looked at the bed, and then at the open door.

'Huh,' said Alvin. 'I guess he left.'

In fact, Theodore was already downstairs and bundling his and Alvin's trousers into the washing machine. He met Dave as he was coming out of the utility room, smiled and said, 'Morning, Dave.'

'Morning, Theodore,' said Dave. 'Sleep all right?'

'Very well, thank you,' said Theodore, his smile broadening as he sauntered off to the kitchen.

Miss Miller noticed that, at the breakfast table, Brittany seemed on edge; she kept wriggling in her seat and making small, fidgety alterations to her clothing.

'Are you all right, Brittany, dear?' Miss Miller asked kindly.

'I'm fine, Miss Miller,' said Brittany. 'It's just the heat.'

'It is hot today, isn't it?' said Eleanor, and she jumped out of her seat to go to the freezer. 'I'm going to make Theodore a nice, cold smoothie to drink on the way to school.'

'Just Theodore, huh?' said Brittany, who suddenly felt parched at the sound of ice cubes falling into a plastic beaker.

Eleanor looked troubled as she started packing the blender with fruit. 'I only have time to make one, Brittany, and Theodore... well...'

'It's okay, I get it,' said Brittany, smiling at Eleanor's blush. 'I'll just take an ice water with me. You want me to get you one, Jeanette?' she added, getting to her feet.

'Huh?' said Jeanette, who had been staring dreamily out of the window. 'Are you talking to me?'

'Would you like me to get you an ice water to drink on the way to school?' asked Brittany, raising her voice so as to be heard over the whirr of the blender.

'Oh, um... yeah, thanks, Brittany,' said Jeanette, then she returned her attention to the window.

'It's about time you all were going, Jeanette,' said Miss Miller.

'Oh yeah, I guess it is,' said Jeanette, and a minute or two later, Miss Miller was ushering the three of them out of the door.

'Goodbye, girls!' she called after them. 'Have a good day, now!'

Just as she finished saying this, she heard Dave calling out from his own front door, 'Bye, fellas! Have a good day!'

'Bye, Dave!' the Chipmunks called back, and then Miss Miller watched as the three fell into step with the Chipettes. Theodore accepted his smoothie from Eleanor with an exclamation of delight, while Jeanette grabbed Simon's arm to walk with him and Alvin said something that made Brittany frown and start to argue.

Miss Miller watched all this with a furrowed brow. Then, when she saw that Dave was about to close his door, she called out, 'David! Hold on a minute there!'

As Miss Miller made her way over to him at an ungainly jog, Dave smiled and said, 'Good morning, Miss Miller.'

'Good morning, David,' said Miss Miller, patting her hair back into place and trying to look unflustered. 'Now, I'll come straight to the point. I have a drawer full of women's sanitary products that I bought in nineteen eighty-seven.'

'Oh, you do?' said Dave, his face registering polite interest mixed with horrified amazement.

'Yes, I do. And they've never been used. Well, obviously they've never been used – I guess that goes without saying.'

'Oh, well, if it's really been that long...'

'Yes?' Miss Miller said hopefully.

'Well,' said Dave, straining to disguise the awkwardness he was feeling, 'I'm sure a charitable institution would be very grateful to have them. I mean of course, you're still a relatively young woman, but the time must come...'

'Oh, David!' said Miss Miller, with a frown of reproach. 'I didn't get them for myself! I went through the Change before I bought them. No, I got them for the girls!'

'Oh, for the girls!' said Dave, light dawning on his face. 'But... they've never been used, you say?'


'I see. And they're turning seventeen in a matter of days.'

'Precisely,' said Miss Miller. 'I mean, are they all just late starters, or...?'

'Or are they never going to need them at all?' Dave finished.


'Well, Miss Miller, I can see exactly why you'd want to know that, but why are you asking me?'

'Who else can I ask?' said Miss Miller. 'You and I are the only ones around here who are raising teenaged chipmunks, David.'

'Yes, of course,' said Dave, 'and the boys have been growing up... well... very much as I expected.' He resisted the urge to look over his shoulder towards the utility room. 'But the male mammal is always pretty much the same, isn't it? Whereas with females... I mean, I guess human women are the only ones who... well, you know...'

Miss Miller sighed. 'Of course it's only human women that check into the Red Roof Inn once a month. How stupid of me.'

'Oh no, Miss Miller, not stupid,' said Dave. 'I mean, they're very like humans, in many ways. For instance, they only have two... I mean, the boys have two nipples each, and –'

'Yes, yes, I know,' said Miss Miller. 'But the point is, it looks like they're not going to need those products after all, doesn't it? But then what do they need? They went to the same human development class with all the other kids. Human development, David – it must've confused the bejesus out of them!'

'Well,' Dave said pensively, 'I guess the person to ask is Vinny.'

'Who's Vinny?'

'She's the boys' mother. You've met her. The last time she was here was a couple of months ago, for the boys' birthday, remember?'

'Oh yes, now I recall,' Miss Miller said vaguely.

'We thought we'd probably wait until school was over to ask her again,' said Dave. 'I hope she won't be offended if she finds out I'm inviting her now with an ulterior motive.'

'Nonsense,' said Miss Miller. 'Everybody will benefit, including her. Of course, she's a wild chipmunk, isn't she? I suppose that means she can't tell them about being careful.'

'Careful?' said Dave.

'Yes, you know, David. Careful.'

'Oh, but I don't think they're...'

'Maybe not yet,' said Miss Miller, with great significance. 'Maybe not yet.'

'But they're too young!' said Dave.

'Only according to a mere human law, you know.'

'Well, I did talk to the boys about that a couple of years ago...'

'I talked to the girls,' said Miss Miller, 'and they learned about it at school. In human development!'

'Well,' said Dave, 'I guess the kids'll be smart enough to work something out. At least, Simon...'

Miss Miller raised an eyebrow. 'Do you really think Simon's going to be the first?'

'No, I don't,' said Dave. 'I think... Well look, Miss Miller, this is a lot to take in all at once. Why don't I just start by inviting Vinny for another visit?'

'Yes, you do that,' said Miss Miller. 'And I think I'll go to the library and try to find out if female chipmunks have a devil's doorbell. If not, I really don't think I can tell them anything. Do you think the books in the public library have that kind of information? Well, I guess there's only one way to find out!'

With that, Miss Miller turned and walked briskly off down the driveway. Dave stared after her for some moments, then slowly closed the door.

At recess, the Chipmunks and Chipettes were sitting together around a picnic table in the school grounds. They all looked uncomfortably hot and were swigging bottles of water, with the exception of Jeanette, who had her nose buried in a book.

'Jeanette,' said Simon, 'I'm a little worried about you not drinking your water. It's so hot today, you might get dehydrated.' There was no response. 'Um... Jeanette?'

'Hey, Jeanette!' said Eleanor, loudly but politely, and she nudged her sister on the arm. Jeanette looked up, blinking in surprise at her surroundings. 'Simon says you should drink your water.'

'Oh, right,' said Jeanette, and she took a swig.

'What are you reading?' asked Eleanor.

'Just what we're doing in English lit.' Jeanette closed the book, keeping her place with her thumb, and revealed the front cover of Wuthering Heights.

'Oh no, not that thing,' said Brittany. 'I couldn't get through the first page without falling asleep!'

'Oh, but it's so beautiful!' said Jeanette, and then her mind wandered off into a dream world.

'Then you haven't read any of the set text?' Simon asked Brittany, horrified.

'About half a page,' said Brittany. 'So you've read it, have you?'

'I always do my homework,' said Simon.

'And did you like it?' Brittany asked doubtfully.

'Well...' Simon looked uncertainly at Jeanette, who was gazing into the distance. 'I can certainly see why it's admired by literary connoisseurs, and Jeanette gave me quite a stimulating discussion about the story so far when we were studying together.'

'Yeah?' said Brittany. 'Well, let's not have another one now. It's boring!'

'What'll you do in class, Brittany, if you haven't read it?' asked Theodore.

'Oh, I don't know,' said Brittany. 'What are you going to do, Alvin?'

'Me?' said Alvin. 'I know all about that book.'

'Let me guess,' said Brittany. 'You watched the movie, right?'

'Just like half the class,' said Alvin. 'But not you. I guess you were too busy washing your hair or something, right, Brittany?'

'What if I was?' said Brittany. 'If I wasted my time falling asleep over some movie and came here today with greasy hair, you'd have something to say about it.'

'I would not,' said Alvin. 'If I were rude enough to make personal remarks like that, I'd have had plenty to say to you already.'

Brittany scowled, while Eleanor jumped to her feet and said, 'Okay, I don't think I want to stick around for this. Walk me to my locker, Theodore?'

Theodore grinned at her. 'Sure!'

'I'd better go to my locker too,' said Simon. 'My copy of Wuthering Heights is in there.'

'Oh, right, I guess I'd better get one of those too,' said Alvin.

Brittany laughed unpleasantly. 'If you think you'll find any left in the library, then good luck.'

'Worth a try,' said Alvin. 'Hey, Simon, if there is a copy, can I get it out on your library card?'

Simon frowned at him. 'What's wrong with your card?'

'I lost it,' said Alvin.

'Again?' Simon rolled his eyes in despair. 'Sometimes I wonder what you would do without...'

They were walking off by this time, their voices fading into the loud hum of general schoolyard chatter. Brittany watched them go, looking pensive. When they were out of sight, she turned to Jeanette, who was once again reading Wuthering Heights. So immersed was she in Heathcliff's final meeting with a dying Cathy that when Brittany shook her arm, it was like being awoken unpleasantly from a dream.

'What? What's going on?' asked Jeanette.

'Obviously I can't go to English lit. today, Jen,' said Brittany. 'Will you cover for me? Say I went to the nurse's office?'

'Sure, I guess so,' said Jeanette. 'Where are you really going?'

'Oh, nowhere much.' Brittany stood up and slung her school bag onto her shoulder. 'Thanks, sis. I owe you one.'

Some minutes later, the English literature class was about to begin. Alvin was straining towards Theodore's desk to look at his copy of Wuthering Heights while Simon, Eleanor and most of the rest of the class sat looking expectantly at the teacher. Jeanette was once more absorbed in her copy of the book – her own personal copy, as she well remembered, for she was now decorating the blank pages at the back with her own name. Jeanette Miller. Jeanette Seville.

'Brittany Miller,' said the teacher at the front of the room. Receiving no reply, he looked up from his roll call list and his eyes found Brittany's empty desk. 'Does anyone know where Brittany is?'

Apart from Jeanette, who was still busy doodling, they all looked at him blankly.

'Eleanor?' said the teacher. 'Do you know where she is?'

'No, Mr Williams,' said Eleanor.

'Jeanette, do you know?' said Mr Williams.

Jeanette did not look up. Simon reached over and gave her the gentlest of nudges, at which she jumped violently and slammed her book shut.

'Jeanette, do you know where Brittany is?' Mr Williams asked patiently.

'What?' said Jeanette, adjusting her dislodged glasses. 'Brittany? Oh... yes, Mr Williams, I do know about that. She said to tell you she went to the nurse's office.'

'Nurse's office, huh?' Mr Williams said doubtfully. 'What's wrong with her?'

'Cramps,' Jeanette said at once, wearing an expression of absolute honesty.

'Oh.' Mr Williams hastily returned his eyes to his roll call. 'Eleanor Miller.'

'Here,' Eleanor said distractedly, for she was looking oddly at Jeanette.

'Jeanette Miller... Jeanette!'

'What? Oh, yes, I'm here...'

At lunchtime, Eleanor and Jeanette went to the bathroom together. When they were washing their hands, Eleanor said, 'What was the real reason Brittany wasn't in class, Jeanette?'

'Because she didn't read the book, I guess,' said Jeanette. 'Was it that obvious I was lying?'

'To me it was,' said Eleanor. 'We don't get those kind of cramps, remember?'

'Oh yeah,' said Jeanette. 'Well, I don't guess Mr Williams is ever going to find that out.'

'I guess not,' said Eleanor. 'But anyway, about Brittany...'

'Are you afraid she's in some kind of trouble, Ellie?' asked Jeanette. 'If not, then it's none of our business, is it? I mean, if she does it again, maybe then we should worry.'

'Yeah, I guess you're right,' said Eleanor. Then, as Brittany wandered into the bathroom, 'Oh!'

'Hi, you guys.' Brittany joined them by the washbasins, dumped her school bag on the floor and began examining her forehead in the mirror. 'Did you remember to cover for me, Jeanette?'

'Of course, Brittany,' said Jeanette.

'Awesome,' said Brittany. 'Seriously, thank you.'

She sounded so sincere that Eleanor suddenly became sure her sister had been on some important mission, so she asked, 'Was it just because you didn't read the book, Brittany?'

'Of course,' said Brittany. 'Don't worry, Ellie, I won't make a habit of it. I just figured it wouldn't really matter, since the school year's practically over anyway.'

'What about when we work on that book this Friday?' asked Eleanor.

'Well,' said Brittany, 'I guess I'd better not play hooky again. Maybe I'll get you guys to fill me in on the story, huh?'

'Oh, Brittany, it's so tragic!' said Jeanette. 'Cathy and Heathcliff are in love but she won't marry him, so he runs away, and when he comes back she's married to someone else and then she dies!'

'She what?' said Brittany, frowning. 'What the hell does she marry somebody else for? If she loves this Heathcliff guy, why doesn't she marry him?'

'Well, that's debatable,' said Jeanette. 'How about we go over it tonight, Brittany?'

Brittany broke into a huge smile and gave Jeanette a hug. 'Thank you, Jeanette. You're being the best sister ever today. Oh... no offence, Eleanor.'

'None taken,' Eleanor said dryly, as her two sisters picked up their bags and then linked arms to walk out of the restroom together. Eleanor walked a few paces behind them, still wondering how worried she should be about Brittany playing hooky, but such thoughts were pushed from her mind when she saw Theodore at his locker. Smiling, she walked towards him; by the time he had closed the door and turned around, she was there.

'Hi, Theodorable!' she said, flinging her arms around his neck.

'Hi!' said Theodore, returning the embrace.

'Brittany,' said Jeanette, as the two of them watched from across the corridor. 'I think those two are officially an item now. What do you think?'

'I don't know,' said Brittany. 'You'd better ask Eleanor.'

'I wonder how you know.'

'Know what?'

'When it's official,' said Jeanette.

'I guess you just agree between yourselves,' said Brittany. 'Anyway, come on, let's go to chem. lab.'

Miss Miller was at the Seville house with Dave when Vinny arrived the following Friday.

'Hi, Vinny,' said Dave, as he let her into the house. 'You remember Miss Miller, don't you?'

'Of course. Hello, Miss Miller,' Vinny smiled at her. 'It's nice to see you. You and I don't usually get to talk to each other very much, do we?'

'It'll be a pleasure to get to know you better, Vinny,' Miss Miller smiled at her. 'For my girls too. I haven't told them you're coming – I didn't want to spoil the surprise for the boys. But I'm sure the girls will have plenty to talk to you about later.'

'Oh, really?' Vinny said politely.

'Let's get you settled in, Vinny,' said Dave, before Miss Miller could say any more. 'Please come through to the den. Would you like anything to eat or drink?'

'Thank you, I'll wait for the boys,' said Vinnny, as she sat down with Dave on the couch. 'How are they?'

'Just as you left them back in March,' said Dave, while Miss Miller stood listening in the doorway. 'I don't know if you noticed it then, Vinny, but I think Theodore's really growing in confidence at last. He hasn't been so dependent on Alvin and Simon lately.'

'That's good,' said Vinny.

'And I think you'll find those two very much as you'd expect,' said Dave. 'Although Simon's been spending more time than usual in the basement lately, and he hasn't told any of us what he's doing.'

'Some sort of scientific experiment, I'd think,' said Vinny.

'I don't know about that,' said Dave. 'He's always building models. I keep seeing him go down there with balsa wood and Elmer's glue and all kinds of... God knows what.'

'Scientific models, maybe?' said Vinny. 'Well, I guess it's none of my business if he doesn't want people to know. And you're all right, Dave?'

'Oh yes, I'm ticking along just fine. How are things in the forest?'

'Well, there are never too many problems there by late spring. Oh, I know what I wanted to tell you! You remember my friend Mr Lizard, don't you?'

'Er... yes, of course,' said Dave, and he started looking warily around the room. 'Is he here?'

'Oh, no,' Vinny tittered. 'I just wanted to tell you that he and Mrs Lizard hatched a clutch of eggs last week. They have seventeen children now!'

'Well, that's great,' Dave smiled politely.

'Talking of reproduction...' Miss Miller said loudly.

'All right, Miss Miller, let's talk about that,' said Dave. Then, to Vinny, he added, 'I don't want you to think this is the only reason I asked you here today...'

'Think what is?' asked Vinny. 'Are we expecting some grandchildren, Dave? I'd say that's an excellent reason for me to come here!'

'Oh, no!' said Dave, aghast. 'The kids are much too young for that!'

'They're not, you know,' said Vinny.

'Oh, but they are,' said Miss Miller. 'In the society that we're living in, I mean.'

'But they'll be more than physically capable by now,' said Vinny. 'So, that's that.'

'No it isn't, Vinny,' Dave insisted. 'People in the city have access to something called birth control. But I guess you don't know anything about that, do you?'

Vinny laughed and said, 'You can't control birth, Dave.'

'Huh,' said Dave, beginning to look worried.

'How long until the boys are back from school?' asked Vinny.

Dave glanced at the clock. 'Only about ten minutes.'

'I think I'll go outside and wait for them,' said Miss Miller. 'You can surprise your boys while I take the girls aside and... well anyway, we'll see you at dinner, David... Vinny. I'll see myself out.'

'Great. Bye, Miss Miller,' said Dave, as Miss Miller left the room. Then he turned back to Vinny and said, 'I've invited her and the Chipettes over for dinner.'

'That'll be nice,' said Vinny. 'Dinner for nine! You must be quite a cook, Dave.'

'I must, mustn't I?' said Dave, suddenly starting to doubt every aspect of his and Miss Miller's plan.

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