Cartoon Erotica part I

BY : missSandy_southparkfan
Category: +S through Z > South Park
Dragon prints: 6862
Disclaimer: This story has no profiting and is just for fun! I do not own the copyright of South Park or it's characters. I have put impersonations of celebrities (Blake Shelton, Miley Cyrus, Adele, Lady Gaga)

 

 

Dear diary,

I'm twenty years old and I have finally become a country star. I've worked my whole life for this. I got to perform at a pizza place in South Park, Colorado called Shaky’s where kids love to go. Most of my fans are teenagers and children. I sang a lot of covers and originals for once in a while. Every song I played for these children, I put emotion into it. After my performance, I thought, "that was fun!"

The next day, I was outside the pizza place helping them put up flyers for my performance there. After that, I went for a walk to do my own things before my performance that night. I looked all around south park to see what that place was like. It's full of kids! 

Meanwhile, I sit on a bench to practice for the show, and four little boys walk by. One of them looks at me from across the street, so I pretend I don't notice. I hear him say, "Oh my God! Can it be?" Another boy says, "Holy shit! It's Sandy Caroline! She's on the bench of the sidewalk!" The first boy who points me out says, "We should meet her now. We only saw her last night when we had pizza." I recognized them. I remembered that they were there. Those boys come up to me and and say, "Wow you were so great last night for a performance at Shaky’s!" I say "Aww thank you! You can come see me perform anytime. I love performing for children your age." "Thats our favorite place to eat. I hear your performing there every weekend." "I sure am, kid." "The name's Kyle." "Kyle. I like that. And what's your name?" "I'm Stan." I hear a blonde boy say, "You guys, I think she's a child molester." "Shut it, Butters. You always think new peopl are." I get a shock. "What's his name?" the blonde boy says "I'm Butters, ma'am." "Butters! Is it on your birth certificate?" "No. It's really Leopold, but everyone calls me Butters." "Butters; I like that. Are you gonna legally change your name when your older? I change mine when I was eighteen." "You can do that?" "Of course. You have to be eighteen tho." Stan asks "How old are you now?" "I'm twenty. What about you, little mister?" I say to the last boy. "What about me?" he walks away. "I'm sorry. He's not much of a people person," says Stan. "I don't think he's really a fan of you either." "I see. Well, not everybody is gonna like me. There's going to be a dislike of me in life sometimes, but I'm still always being myself and never let anyone's opinions effect me." "Wow! You have a great attitude for a celebrity," says Kyle. "I know. Most celebrities are bitchy and crabby because there in it for money and popularity. But I don't care about the money. I'm in it because music is my passion and its what I do best. Keep in mind, you guys, there is no such thing as being popular. I find popularity to be overrated." "You are a very smart lady, Miss Caroline." "You can call me Sandy, or as some people call me Sandy to shorten it. I know most celebrities hate that, but I acknowledge my fans to be my friends." "Thank you, but I feel more comfortable calling you Miss Caroline. Is that ok?" asks Kyle. "Sure. Whatever floats your boat." "Again, Miss Caroline, I'm really sorry about that fat ass. He's always being one." "Awwww don't call him that." "But I always call him that because he is." "well maybe he could be a total jerk, but has nothing to do with his weight. It just hurts me to see people get called names that are discriminatory against their weight because I've been thru that in high school. And I'm sure he's probably not that bad of a person. He has feelings just like us. And deep down I think he has a good heart." "I never thought of it that way." "Does that boy ever try to get to know people?" "You mean Cartman?" "his names Cartman?" "well that's what Stan and I call him." "Does he mind if you formally introduce him to me?" "I'll try. Cartman!" That boy named Cartman came over. "what do you want?" "Miss Caroline wants to meet you." "Yeah. You saw her last night at her concert. You looked like were having fun," Stan adds in. "Oh I was. I was." I smile and say, "Cartman, it's okay if you just went for the pizza. Sometimes I only do things for the food too." "I also went for my friends." "Oh, that's cool because I'm very social." Then Cartman says to his friends, "You guys, I wanna go home." "You kids can run along. Hopefully you can come see me perform again. Have fun!"

It was so wonderful to meet a little boy who I still don't know if he's a fan of me or not, but I see a one big thing we have in common. I find him a little unique. I think he is cuter that the other kids I met. Even tho he was kind of avoiding me a little, after getting to know Stan, Kyle and Butters, I really wanna get to know that boy Cartman the way I got to know the the others. He doesn't even have to like me. Not everyone is gonna like me.

Cartmans side

Dear diary,

So my friends Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Butters convinced me to go see Sandy Caroline at Shakys. What convinced me was the pizza they serve.

I was sitting at the table with the guys and they were going on and on about that Sandy Caroline chick. I was so annoyed. I just wanted pizza! "C'mon, Cartman. Everyone loves Sandy Carrahlynn's music. You will too," says Stan. "Right. Your taking me to a girlie concert. I can't believe you guys like her too." "Actually, Sandy Caroline isn't that girlie. She acts like a man," replied Kyle. "Yeah. Caroline relates to boys very well," says Stan. "She's still a woman." I suddenly hear the country girl start talking thru the microphone. For some reason, I start listening. I'm no longer focused on my food. As soon as she starts strumming her guitar and vocalizing, I feel a little tingly inside. It was a strange feeling I never felt in my life. The minute Sandy hits those high notes, my penis starts to feel kind of stiff. I pushed my chair in really deep so that my boner doesn't show. I just turned my head to the stage to look at her. Butters asks, "Eric, are you okay?" "I'm fine, Butters. Be quiet." I just dozed off watching that country bitch. I couldn't help but look at different parts of her. From her skin I could tell she was Irish. Her hair color was very unique. In my eyes I was feeling her hair. Her body was very curvy. The best part I tried but I couldnt resist looking at is her crotch. My penis got harder. I think in my head "I shouldn't feel this way about a woman. Girls are gross." But I just couldn't stop looking at her and especially her crotch. Couldn't help notice her moving her hips. Feeling the tingles on my penis, without realizing I was moaning quietly. "Cartman, are you okay?" asks Kyle. "Yeah I'm fine. Why?" "I heard noises that's all." "Noooo I was just humming along." "See? I told you that you would like her." "Who said anything about liking her?" "You said you were humming along." "It doesn't mean I like her." "Well maybe you like her music, then." "I don't like anything!" "Not even pizza?" "Shut up, Kyle! Just fucking shut up!"

After the concert, Stan asks me, "So what did you think, Cartman?" I knew what they meant but I said "The food was great!" "Not that, fat ass! Sandy Caroline." "I'd never watch her again. Not with you guys!" I ran back home. When I got home, I drew a picture of me and Sandy Caroline holding hands and hid it where no one can find it. I looked up more videos of Sandy singing. I watch it nonstop.

The next day, Stan, Kyle, Butters and I were all hanging out. As we were walking, Kyle asks, "Cartman, why were you humming along to Caroline if you really don't like her." I told him, "Kyle will you quit talking about her already?" "No. I wanna know what's gotten into you." "Then here's your answer. Nothing." "Oh, my God!" Stan exclaims. "There's Miss Caroline over there!" Kyle gasps. "Oh, my God it is her! Now is our chance to meet her!" I didn't know if I could take it. I just stood there as the others went. Kyle came back said "Cartman your coming with us." "No! I am not meeting that country bitch!" "Yes you are! I know you like her." Kyle drags me over as I'm begging him to let go. If they see my boner, or if Sandy sees it, things will be bad. I can't take feeling like this. They had to make me face my urges. I just look down to the ground to avoid looking at the woman's beautiful face and having my penis get stiff. The lady talks to me and says "what about you, little mister?" As soon as she starts talking to me, I started to feel tingling just hearing her talk to me directly. I just say, "What about me?" Then walk away. Unfortunately they were wondering why I was acting anti social. I knew a boner was coming because the woman of my dreams was literally talking to me. Just her voice turns me on to begin with. Looking the other way, none of my friends could see my penis sticking out a little bit. I couldn't take my strong feelings of hearing her talk specifically to me. When I heard Sandy stick up for me when Kyle called me a fat ass, I was really happy to hear that she thinks positive about me. When Sandy said that she wanted to "formally meet me" I was even more scared. One of the boys called my name, so I just walked holding my penis with my thighs. I didn't make any eye contact at all. I asked the guys if we could just go the hell home. When Sandy let us go, I regretted looking away a little bit, but if I had looked at her gorgeous face, my boner would've cracked. As we were walking home, I heard Sandy continuing to practice on the bench. I ran faster because I couldn't take that beautiful sound.

When I got home, I ran into my bed and just talked to myself. My mom came in the room unexpectedly, so I quickly laid on my stomach. "Eric, is everything ok?" "Yes, mom. It's fine. Go away." "Your friends were wondering why you came home when you were gonna play basket ball with them." "ummmm tell em I'm not feeling well. Now is a bad time to play." "is there something you need to talk to mommy about, poopsikins?" "No there is nothing I need to talk to mommy about." My mom just stares. "Will you leave me alone, mom?" "Okay, I'm sorry I bothered you." As soon as my mom finally left me in peace, I opened my pants to see if my penis was still hard. It was softening a little. I drew more pictures of Sandy. I couldn't help it. My penis felt a little warmer. My room was the best place to bone up. I touched myself but I had to stop because I'm in fourth grade. I'm too young to have sexual urges. But I couldn't help it. I just had to touch myself as if it was her. Luckily I cummed under the covers so that I could hide it with my blanket. After I ejaculated, I felt better then. I went outside to hang out with my friends. They were just in the middle of the game. "Cartman? I thought you were sick," said Kyle. "Oh I'm better now." Kyle stairs at me. "Cartman, Stan, Kenny and I are suddenly worried about you." "Oh yeah. Your 'suddenly worried about me'? Since when do you worry about me?" "Well, even tho your an asshole sometimes, your our friend. We're always looking after you." "Yeah, dude," Stan adds. "You can tell us anything." "Yeah well I can't tell you this." "Why not?" Stan asks. "C'mon if I told you something like this you would laugh at me. I just can't tell you. I'm sorry."

My side

Dear diary

After rehearsal for the next weekend, I took a walk down town with my guitar on my back. I walked pass a bus stop to find 2 of the boys I met and 1 other. "Hello, children." "Oh, hi Miss Caroline." The boy who I didn't meet yesterday looks at me and exclaims in a muffled tone. "I'm sorry. I never met you yesterday. What's your name?" He says his name muffled. "Hey, kid? You mind unzippering just a little bit. I can't understand you." "His name is Kenny," says Kyle. "So where's that kid named Cartman?" "Oh he's running late. He won't tell us why. He's been acting strange lately." "Oh, we'll, even tho he's not such a huge fan of me, I'd really like to get to know him. I really think we relate and I'm just interested. He doesn't have to like me. I understand. Do you think you can talk to him for me." "Sure. We'll talk to him." "Thank you, Kyle."

So later, I get a call from an unknown number. I pick up the phone. "Hello?" "Hello. Cartman residence. Is this Miss Sandy Caroline?" "it sure is ma'am. You said 'Cartman residence'?" "Yes. My son's friends told me that they all formally met you except for my son Eric who was sort of shy. His friends told me that you were really interested in getting to know Eric." "Wait. So his name is Eric?" "Yes. Now is it true that you wanted to bond with him?" "Yes, ma'am." "Oh, that's wonderful. My son is making friends with my favorite country singer." "Wow, miss. I've always hoped to be a favorite." "Oh, you sure are, Miss Caroline. I'll write down my address and have the boys give it to you." "Sounds good to me."

The boys gave me the Cartman's residence address. It said I had to meet them there thursday afternoon. I went to whatever that kid's names' house. I rang the door bell and the lady who called me answered the door. "Hi. I'm Leanne Cartman." "Nice to meet you Mrs. Cartman." "Come on inside, Miss Caroline." The lady calls her son down. "Eric, your friend's here!" That boy comes downstairs. I figure out that Cartman is his last name. "Would you like anything to drink, Miss Caroline?" "No thanks, Mrs. Cartman. I carry my thermos everywhere with ice cold water that way I don't get thirsty." "That's very smart of you. I'll let you guys hang out a little bit. Eric, you be good for Miss C, you got that?" "Got it, mom." She leaves the room.

That boy was still looking away. "I am so happy that your mother made this possible." "She sure did." "I just wanna reassure you that just because we're doing this it doesn't mean you have to like me. Like I said, not everyone can like me and I'm cool with that." "Where did you get the idea of me not liking you?" "Well, for one, you never look at me. Are you afraid I might might turn you into stone?" I giggle. "Where do you get this crap from?" "Haven't you ever heard of the Greek myth about Medusa?" "I don't read Greek mythology." "I see. Now, the boys introduced you as Cartman but now I know that it's your last name. I'm very sensitive when it comes to addressing people. So the question is, what would you like me to address you as." "I'm glad you asked because Cartman is what Stan and Kyle call me. You call me Eric." "So you prefer Eric?" "Yes." "No problem. You can call me whatever you want." "Great. Thanks." "Eric, could you tell me why you never look at me? I saw you at my concert and you watched me perform. Why aren't you looking at me when I talk to you?" Eric stammers. "I've learned my whole life that you have to make eye contact even if you don't like the person." "Who said that I didn't like you." "Your friends told me that your probably not a big fan of me." "They're assholes! Especially Kyle who I sometimes wanna kick him in the nuts!" "Well then if you are a fan of me, then why don't you look me in the eye? Are you worried that I'm not gonna like the looks of your face?" "No. I like my face." "Eric, if you won't tell me why you don't make eye contact with me, would you consider just taking just one peek at my face?" Eric sighs. "I feel like maybe your just shy, especially since I'm famous. But just one look." He hesitated a little. He turned his head but then looked back front. "C'mon Eric. You can do it." Eric turns slowly till I see the corner of his eye. "Cmon Eric. Your almost there. I wanna see your face." He finally turned his body and face toward me, but his eyes were closed. "Eric, that doesn't count as looking at me. Please open your eyes." I hold his face towards me, so that he won't look away. "Open your eyes for 3 seconds. C'mon." He shuts his eyes tightly. Then lightens them up. He opens his eyes lightly til his eyes are half open. Finally he opens his eyes wide. After three seconds I let go of him and he just keeps looking at me. "Wow. I guess looking at me isn't so bad."

Finally after Eric was able to look at me, I ask him, "So, Eric, if your not into Greek mythology, what are you into?" "Oh, I don't know. I hang out with Stan, Kyle and Kenny most of the time. You know, boy things." "I do a lot of boy things with my guy friends. What kinds of things do you and your friends like to do?" "Basket ball, video games, ripping on each other's asses, watching Terrence and Phillip," I interrupt, "Whats Terrence and Phillip?" "Its a tv show that all the boys like. The girls think its gross." "Well if mostly guys like it then I might like it." "Stan and Kyle did tell me that you act mannish." "Haha. I do a little." "Let's see if Terrence and Phillip is on." Eric turns on the tv. Terrence and Phillip was on. I discovered that that show was about fart jokes. Those jokes crack me up. Eric and I were both laughing. "Now I see something else we have in common. We have the same sense of humor." "Yeah I know. Sandy, your the first friend in my life who understands me." "I know just how you feel. I could already tell you don't get along with Kyle. It hurt me to hear him call you names." "Thats why I wanna kick him in the nuts sometimes." "Yeah, some people I wanna kick in the nuts sometimes too. I get tired of discrimination." "Me too." "Does Kyle call you a 'fat ass' all the time." "Every minute of every day." "Oh that's not good. That doesn't sound like a real friend. I've been called fat many times but not that much. I can't imagine. I hear you have emotional problems--," before I finish he interrupts me. "Everyone says that." "Well its ok if you do because I have emotional problems myself. I overcame them but I still have one of those breakdowns." "Do you really?" "yes, Eric." "I have a lot of breakdowns almost every day." "Thats not good. I have a panic attack in crowds." "Me too." "Eric, it was nice getting to know for the first time, but I have to get to rehearsal. I would love to get to know you better. Maybe we can talk again on Monday since I'm not performing." "I'll ask my mom. I gotta admit. I had fun." "That's awesome, Eric. I'm sure your mother will approve. I hope you can come see me at my concert again."

Cartman's side

Dear diary,

So I missed the bus because I faked a bathroom problem when really I needed to make myself squirt so that I don't get a boner at school. I tired out but I had to go to school. I was out of energy, so at recess I didn't really do anything. At lunch I owed Chef a lot of money for all the food I got. I was so hungry from the orgasm.

After school, I took a nap for a while. After I woke up, my mom comes to my room and says, "Eric, can I talk to you for a minute?" "Sure mom. Shoot." "your friends told me about this young woman that they met, whom you all saw perform at Shaky’s. They told me that you didn't really meet her and that she wants to, you know, bond with you." "Bond with me?" "Yes. Her name's Sandy Caroline." "What? No! No! No! Mom, I don't wanna get to know Sandy Caroline." "Eric, she is not a bad person. The boys told me that you don't have to like her, she's just interested. That's all. I am calling her tomorrow to make the arrangements." "Nice try, mom, but you don't have her number." "She's a celebrity. I can get her number anywhere." "Mom, why are you making me do this?" "What do you have against her?" I paused to come up with an excuse. "Girl singers are a load of crap!" "Oh, Eric. Don't be such a boy." "I am a fucking boy!" "Eric watch your language. Kyle told me that you were watching her the whole time and didn't focus on your food. He even told me that you were humming along to her songs." "Doh! That son of a bitch!" "Miss Caroline will be coming here to talk to you in the living room." "What's so special about me that makes you set me up with that lady." "There must be something special about you to her that makes her wanna get to know you. The boys told me that she identifies with you and you guys have a one big thing in common." "What is that one thing?" "I don't know. You'll have to ask her when you see her." "I'm not making friends with a country bitch!" "Eric, what did I say about the language? When Miss Caroline comes here, you better be nice to her."

I tried to make my way out of facing my sexual urges. I figured maybe I should cum before I see her. I over heard my mom talking to Sandy on the phone making arrangements. I was so queezey it was not funny. The day I had to see her, I woke up laying awake and just wanked it all out. I rubbed my penis till I felt the warm and wet stuff shooting out. I heard the doorbell ring, perfect timing. My mom called me down stairs so I just had to be strong. Even tho I warmed my penis, I still felt the tingles inside. I still didn't look at her dazzling face because I didn't wanna feel so crazy about her. I finally got to tell her that I am Eric to her, not Cartman. Just hearing her keep talking to me gave me more tingles. I couldn't tell her about my urges towards her but I ran out of excuses to not look at her. When she held my face to make me look at her, my urges grew stronger. That was the first time she touched me. I finally overcame it and opened my eyes. I got to look at her without going nuts. I finally realized we had way more in common. Stan and Kyle were right. Sandy is very manly. I showed her Terrence and Phillip. Just talking all of this boy talk, I then had feelings for her too. When she had to go, I realized that I wanted to see her again.

My mom walked in the room. She asked, "So how did it go Eric?" "You were right, mom. She's not so bad after all. We have everything in common." "That's wonderful, poopsie." "We're hoping to do this again." My mom almost got a heart attack. "Why Eric, I don't know what to say. My son best friends with my favorite country star!"

I was at the bus stop with the guys and Kyle asks, "So, Cartman, how did it go with Miss Caroline?" I didn't know how I should respond. "Good, Kyle. Just good." Stan adds in. "We wanna hear all about it, dude." I sighed. "She's nice." "You got along with her didn't you, Cartman?" Kyle just had to say. "Ok, so we have everything in common. Big deal." "Cartman, stop denying it." "Denying what? What do I have to deny?" "We know you like Miss Caroline," replied Stan. "Yeah, dude. In fact, I feel like you have a crush on Caroline. And it's ok if you do. I've had crushes on celebrity women myself." Stan replies to Kyle, "You know that she's a lesbian right?" "Well, yes, but just because you have a crush on  someone it doesn't always mean your gonna get em. I have a lot of crushes who are lesbians." "I just don't want Cartman to get his hopes up. That's all." I just had to shout out, "I don't have time for this shit!"

My side

Dear diary

I was so happy after hanging out with Eric, that I realized I had feelings for him. I thought "No fuck me! Why do I feel like this?" It was the first time in a long time I felt this way about a guy. Plus he's only a child and I'm twenty. I've been with girls of 12, 13 and 14 but somebody younger is a big thing for me. He's a prepubertal boy so I don't know how he would feel about me. I don't know if I should tell him. He might tell his mom and she might call the police. He's probably turned off by a woman my age. But I just have to try!!

Dear diary

I decided to take advice from the boys. I saw Stan, Kyle and Kenny. I asked them, "Hey, kids. I have a question. If a twenty year old woman told you she had feelings for you, would you have your parents call the police on her?" Kyle looks at me and says, "It really depends on the move she makes. If she just said that she was interested in me, I'd be fine with that. But if she tried to molest me, I'd take big action." "Oh. Ok. Would you date an adult woman?" "It depends on the person. If she's a down to earth girl with a good personality, then yes. If she's a creep then no." "Hmmm ok. Now this might be a tuffy. If she was originally a lesbian and told you you were the only boy she liked, would you take it?" "Well again, Miss Caroline, it depends on the woman. If I was attracted to her back then yes." "Well, you should never date someone your not attracted to." "Miss Caroline are you trying to tell me that you like me?" "Oh no! No! I was being hypothetical. There is a little boy who is the only guy I like but it's not you, Kyle. It's not you either Stan or Kenny." "And it's not Cartman either, right?" Stan adds. I hesitated. "Oh, children, if it was would you hold it against me?" "Of course not. Except he is a dick so why would you like him anyway." "Children, Eric is the only boy I like. No joke. I couldn't help but feel the chemistry between us. If he doesn't feel the same way, that's ok. I just wanna try it." Stan says, "Miss Caroline, I understand that he's the only guy you like and you like him even tho he's a kid, but why do you like him. He was avoiding you." "Yeah, Miss Caroline. He always rips on me for being Jewish and he's very racist too." "Well, Eric told me that you always rip on him for being fat and that's not right. Like I said, I find him to be a very nice boy deep down. I'm sure he'll be cool about it if he doesn't have feelings for me too. If he does, no one has to know." "We wouldn't do anything about it. I'm sure he wouldn't either. I just hope you both know what you want. I just want him to be happy because he's always miserable." "I see that." Stan adds, "Kyle and I kind of suspect he has a crush on you." "Really?" "Yes. We could sorta tell." "But then why was he avoiding me before? Also why did I have to convince him to look at me?" Kyle says, "He's in denial. He probably thinks he might get a boner by looking at you." "Ohhhh. I never thought of that. I'll talk to him next time I see him."

Dear diary

I'm supposed to hang out with Eric again tomorrow. I don't know how I can tell him how I feel. I messed up at rehearsal because I was shaky thinking about Eric and how I can tell him I love him. I have nothing to lose I know. I just hope that he'll be cool if he doesn't love me back. I gotta come out with it. I gotta get it off my chest. The boys told me that there's a chance he might like me back. I gotta be strong. I mustn't hold back.

Dear diary

I went to Eric's house again. When I stepped inside, Eric's mother asked me if I wanted anything to drink. I say, "Do you happen to have any coffee?" She says, "Could you repeat that?" "I said do you have coffee?" I heard Eric laughing his ass off. "What's so funny, Eric?" "Nothing, Sandy. I just love the way you say coffee." Mrs. Cartman says, "Oh yes it's very unique. I have heard your from New York." "I sure am." "We do have coffee. I'll go in the kitchen to get you some." I sit down next to Eric. He says, "Oh, Sandy, I love how your accent is different." "everything about me is different. That's how I'm being who I am." "That's what I realized that I like about you because it's hard for me to be who I am." "It took me til my junior year to learn how to be myself without caring what anyone thinks. I hope you can learn a lot from me." "I feel like I have to pretend to be something I'm not just to have friends." Mrs. Cartman comes in and hands me my coffee. "Thank you, ma'am." "You're very welcome, Miss C. You kids enjoy." She leaves the room and I tell Eric, "I'd rather not have any friends then be what I'm not. I've always wished to be a stripper, but my body isn't built for that." "Sandy, you really need to talk about your body?" "I know. My body is very unsmooth. Its too curvy for me to show it off." "Sandy, please. Just stop." "What's wrong?" "Nothing. Just nothing." "I have decided that country singing is really my thing. Most people don't like it, but that didn't hold me back. It's what I do best. I am very tolerant even of who you are." "Well that's a first." "I know, Eric. I have a lot of firsts for many things." "This is my first first." "Eric, I feel every part of your pain. We have so much in common. There's something I've wanted to tell you for a while." "Ok." "Ooohh. This is gonna be hard to spit  it out. I know this will be very confusing to you. I keep feeling the want to bail out." "You kind of opened the door, Sandy. Just get it off your chest." I felt sick to my stomach. "Oh, Eric, there's no way you didn't hear any particular rumors about me." "I heard one rumor. Stan and Kyle said that your a lesbian which is why your into boy stuff." "I originally am a lesbian but to a certain degree. My sexuality is very fluid." "What do you mean?" I sighed. "Eric, don't take this the wrong way but I'm not the type of lesbian you would know of. Aside of that, I am a law breaker. I've been with girls of 12 and 13 years of age. I never thought about having feelings for a guy or a person under 12 years. Let's say that that's happening to me right now." "So you like a guy who happens to be like my age." "Yes. I know it's stupid and creepy but if he loves me back there's such a thing as secret relationships. He's the only boy that I like. The only boy I'll ever like. I hope he'll accept that." Eric stammered for a couple of seconds. "I see. Who's the dude?" I got more butterflies in my stomach. "If I tell you, please don't freak out. Feelings are just feelings." "That won't happen. I'll take anything you say seriously." I took a deep breath. "Eric,..." I gulped. "The little boy I have feelings for.... is you." Eric made a shocked face. "I know. It's stupid. Don't rub it in." "Who said anything about it being stupid?" "What are you saying, Eric? If your not interested in me, I am totally cool with it. We can still be friends either way." "Let me get this straight. You like me as in like-like?" "Yes. Stan and Kyle told me I should tell you." "They know?!!" "Yeah. They told me that they think you like me too. They might be wrong." "Sandy, you are a nice lady. We have a lot in common. You're right. This is something I kind of need to think about." "Eric, take your time making your decision. I'd love to pursue our relationship further but if you decide that your not interested, no hard feelings." "Well, you can come over tomorrow and my mind should be made up by then." "That sounds great. I'll be over at 6:00 pm. Just remember, no pressure." "I hear that loud and clear." "Even tho I don't know your answer, I'm glad I told you this. Otherwise I'd be thinking about it all day with no relief. I look forward to hanging out with you tomorrow either way. Your a good kid, Eric. Your such a nice boy." "Thanks, Sandy. Your the only one who's ever said anything nice about me." "I honestly don't see why that is. I must be going. I have an early morning. Remember, Eric, take your time. I'll see you tomorrow." "Bye, Sandy." "Tell your mother I said hi." "I will."

So I left Eric's house and went straight to the hotel I'm staying at. I was anxiously anticipating. I was soo nervous I didn't know what Eric was going to say. I hoped myself the best.

Cartman's side

Dear diary,

Sandy came over again. My mother offered her a drink and she said that she wanted coffee. I was turned on by the way she said coffee. I did hear that she was a New Yorker. As soon as we sat down, Sandy and I were talking and suddenly, she said that she wanted to be a stripper and her body wasn't built for that. Just hearing her say anything about her body, I started to feel the tingles. I asked her to please stop because I forgot to masturbate before she came over. We were talking about being who we are so suddenly, the girl starts telling me how she feels my pain and needed to tell me something. I had a little idea. She asked me if I knew about any rumors of her. I told her how Stan and Kyle said she was a lesbian but she started making confusing explanations. She started talking about the idea of liking a guy who is under 12 and 13 years old. I'm a guy under 12. I was hoping that she was talking about me. I was turned on by the fact that's she's had secret relationships with early teenage girls. I asked her who that guy is and she hesitated. I was really, really hoping it was me. She ended up telling me it was me. I was shocked that she actually was attracted to me back. I didn't know what to say. I told her that I needed to think about it because I wasn't sure if it was a good idea. She said that Kyle and Stan know about her feelings for me. I needed advice from them, so I told her to come over tomorrow so that my mind can be made up.

Dear diary,

I saw my friends at the bus stop so I ran to give them shocking news. "You guys, you are not gonna believe this!" "You had diarrhea?" Kyle asked. "No stupid. Sandy came over yesterday. Now that she has told me that she has feelings for me and that you know it, I admit it. I have feelings for Sandy strong as hell." The guys stare at me. "I know it's stupid! I don't know if I should go with her because of our age difference." "Cartman," said Stan. "We won't do anything about it." "Yeah dude. We want you to be happy for a change. Miss Caroline may be the best thing that's ever happened to you." "I suppose your right. I gotta admit, I couldn’t resist her beauty at her concert. That's why I was avoiding her and humming along." "Cartman, you deserve someone like Miss Caroline. No matter what her age is." Stan adds in, "You do know you have benefits right? You will be dating a lesbian, so she won't run off with other guys!" I was starting to get somewhere. Kyle adds, "Oh, yes! There's that and you can watch her make out with other women." "A lot of guys are turned on by that." "The best part is that you might mature faster." That was the only part I didn't buy. "Are you saying that I'm immature?" "Look, dude," replied Kyle. "Don't stay away from someone you love. Go for it! Make a move!" I thought about it. I say, "You know what? I'll tell her yes when she comes to my place." "That's the spirit, Cartman!"

My side

Dear diary,

So after rehearsal, I went over to Eric's. Eric's mom opened the door. "Hello, Mrs. Cartman." "Good afternoon, Miss C. Come on in." I walk in the house. "So where's Eric?" "He's still out with his friends. He should be home soon. How is he with you." "Oh, Mrs. Cartman, your son and I are getting along very well. It's so wonderful to bond with a child like him." "I am so happy to hear that, Miss C. Its so wonderful to have my son make friends with a singer I am absolutely a huge fan of." "Your son is becoming a fan of me too." Eric steps in the house. He announces "Mom, I'm home." Mrs. Cartman calls out "We're in the kitchen, sweetie." When Eric stepped foot into the kitchen, Mrs. Cartman states, "You kids can hang out. I made coffee for you, Miss C." "Thank you, Mrs. Cartman, but it's 6:00. It's a little late for coffee." I hear Eric's little giggles. Mrs. Cartman turns a little red. "I completely forgot, Miss C. Would you like anything else?" "No that's fine. Thank you so much." "You're very welcome, Miss Caroline."

When Mrs. Cartman leaves the room, Eric and I move to the living room. "Sandy," says Eric. "I took advice from my friends and well, they said that I should go along with how I feel and not stay away from someone I love. In other words, I have made up my mind." "Ok?" Eric breathes in. "I do very much have feelings for you. I have felt this way since I first saw your concert. That's why I've been so shy of you. I can't resist your dazzling beauty. Ever since, I dreamt of being your steady boyfriend." I was speechless. "You really mean that?" "Yes, Sandy. I was very speechless when I learned that you were interested in me. I thought I had no chance with you." "I didn't think I had a chance with you either. You really liked me all this time?" "Yes." He pauses to think. "Do you wanna go to the arcade on Monday?" I was surprised he would ask me out on the date. "Sure, Eric. I've got rehearsal in the morning so what you say around 1:00 pm? I've got my own car." "Neat! That sounds awesome! It's a date." "It sure is. I'm so happy this is happening. I'm so speechless right now. I have go back to the hotel and get ready for my concert at Shaky’s. I'll see you on Monday." I rubbed my hand on his head and pecked him on the cheek.

Cartman's side

Dear diary,

So after school, Stan, Kyle, Kenny and I played a little basket ball. I was playing like a pussy because I was thinking about sweet Sandy. Kenny asks in a muffled tone, "Are you ok, Cartman? You don't look like your having fun." "Oh I am, Kenny. Just stuff on my mind." "It's Miss Caroline, is it?" I sighed. "Yeah, it is Sandy. When she told me that it's never too late to make up my mind I hope she meant it." Kyle comes in. "Cartman, I don't think Caroline has any reason to lie to you." "Yeah, dude. If you tell her you like her when you see her again she'll still feel the same way," says Stan. "I don't just like her. I'm in love with her." "What?" exclaims Kenny. "Alright, that is sick," Kyle remarked. "Kyle, this is serious! I've never felt this way about a woman before, so can't you give me a Goddamn break?" "Cartman's right, Kyle." "Thank you, Stan." I sighed and then said, "I've been avoiding her all this time because every time I see her face, I get a really huge boner. I know its stupid. I can't resist her! She's so beautiful." "it's not stupid. Thats part of going thru changes," replied Stan. "Tell it to Miss Caroline. She said she was interested in you, so she will still be." "Your right, guys. She's coming to my place tonight, so I should tell her then."

So when I get home, and see Sandy, I gotta be strong and hold the boner.

Dear diary,

As soon as I walked in the door, I took a deep breath and announced that I'm home. Sandy was already at my house. I was so aroused by the way Sandy said coffee. It gave me the giggles. My mom finally left us in peace so me and Sandy moved to the living room.

It was easier then I thought. I told her how I felt (except for the boner) and she was speechless. I asked her out for our first date at the arcade on Monday. She not only said yes but she has a car that she can pick me up from my house with and take me. When she had to leave, she petted my head and gave me a peck on the cheek. That made my wiener warmer.

Dear diary,

I've drawn a lot of pictures of Sandy and some of me and her together. I wanna give her one of my drawings. That would mean a lot to her. I might wanna give her my picture of just her. It would show her the beauty I can see in her. I can't sleep because I can't stop thinking about her. I had to touch myself as if it were her and squirt semen to knock me out.

My side

Dear diary

Since I was going outside of my original preference, I made myself a little more feminine than usual. At rehearsal, I got a lot of compliments because I normally dress like a tomboy.

I drove to Eric's place and was welcomed in by his mother. Mrs. Cartman said she needed to run a lot of errands and needed me to babysit Eric. I told her that it's not problem at all. I wasnt gonna babysit. I was going on a date with him.

As soon as Mrs. Cartman left, Eric asked, "So you ready to hit the arcade?" "Whoa! Lets not go right to it! Slow down!" "Sorry am I going to fast?" "Just a little." Eric sits on the couch with me and says, "Sandy, I got you something." He gave me two pictures that he colored. There was one of just me and one of the two of us (me and Eric). I laid my hand on my chest. "Eric, I am so speechless." He smiled and I started petting his head a little bit. "Are you ok with me touching your hair?" "Of course." I start rubbing his back then I stop because of the advice Kyle gave me. "Eric, um, when I asked Kyle for advice, telling him I was interested in you, he said that he wouldn't care as long she doesn't molest him. I was just hoping you would name everything you acknowledge to be molestation so that I'll know what not to do." "Well, from you I don't really think of anything as molestation." "Oh. Well, then I suppose if I ask you if we can..... You know, make out a little bit before we go, I won't be abusing you?" "Hell no." I pause for a couple of seconds. Suddenly, Eric asks, "Do you wanna make out a little bit before we go?" I just look at his face seeing him smile to me. Then just kiss him on his lips. I look at him and smile back then kiss him longer. My hand on his shoulder was slowly coming off him then he held onto my hand to keep it on his shoulder, then started kissing me. So we kissed more intimately and a lot longer. We made out for about 10 minutes. I got this strange but good feeling. It was new to me and I just couldn't identify it. That feeling felt so pleasant, I just grabbed Eric's shirt to overcome the intensity.

When we stopped kissing, I just sat there and looked at the ceiling all happy not knowing what to do. Eric asks "Are you ok?" "Oh I'm just great, Eric. I feel great. Are you ready to go now?" "Totally!"

I went to the arcade with Eric. I had a really fun time with him. We both like boy stuff so the arcade was perfect. we spent the whole day there and went out to a fast food place before going back to his house. It was all fun for us. Just frolicking wild and free. When we got back to his home, we made out in the garage for a few.

As soon as Mrs. Cartman got home, Eric and I were just hanging out it the living room. "Eric, mommy’s home!" "We're in here Mrs. Cartman." "Oh, Miss Caroline, how could I ever thank you for taking such good care of my little boy?" "You don't have to thank me, ma'am. Eric and I had the most wonderful time. Right, Eric?" "Oh yes! We sure did!" "Oh, Miss Caroline," says Mrs. Cartman. "I would be so honored for you to my son's babysitter. I'll pay you $30 a week." "You don't have to pay me. All I care about is the passion." "Are you serious?" "Of course. I gotta get going. I have an early morning tomorrow. I guess you can just call me when he needs to be 'babysat'." I wink at Eric. "I'll call you, Miss C. Thank you so much."

So basically I am being hired to baby sit a little boy, but when I'm "babysitting" I'm not gonna be babysitting, I will be going on a date with him and having our personal affairs. What she doesn't know won't hurt. What matters is that we are officially in love.

Cartman's side

So fortunately I went on my date with Sandy at the arcade. It was awesome! The best part that I didn't expect to happen is that I got to make out with her. She just kissed me on the lips and then we ended up making out, hot and heavy. Kissing her tongue to tongue made my penis not only hard but hot on fire. I was moaning a little bit but tried not to be to loud. I really just breathed heavily but thru my nose. When Sandy grabbed my shirt firmly, she got just a little bit of my nipple for one second and I got really tingly.

Honestly, I don't know why she thought I was feeling sexually abused. She was the first person to ever go to a fast food restaurant with me without judging me on what I eat regarding to my weight. Oh, my God I love this woman so much. I tell you, she's is the best thing that's ever happened to me.

Dear diary,

I went to talk to my friends in the hallway at there lockers. "So how did your date go?" asked Kyle. Thinking about it it was hard to say a word. "Sorry about that, you guys. Sandy is the best thing that's ever happened to me since Mr. Jefferson moved to south park. My mom thinks she's babysitting me but ....... She kissed me." "She what?!!" exclaimed Kenny. "You mean you literally made out with her," asked Stan. "Yup." "Was it long," asked Kyle. "Yup." "Tongue to tongue," asked Kenny. "Yup." "Hot and heavy," asked Stan. I stared at him and said, "Yeah." "Did you get a boner," Kyle asked. "Are we done with the questions? It's not that serious." "Cartman, c'mon. We're just curious," says Kyle. "And look, dude. We just want you to be careful yet I never seen you so happy. I wish the best for you and Miss Caroline." "I'm happy that you accept my first relationship. It means a lot." "I mean it this time, Cartman. As your friends, we keep secrets for you because your not hurting anyone. Again, we want to to be happy for a change." I did not know what to say. I was touched that Kyle felt this way.

My side

Dear diary,

I had another performance at Shaky’s. The theme was "Sandy Goes Country Gaga". That is, it was the night I cover Lady Gaga songs. I've been a fan of Gaga ever since she was first famous. Lady Gaga was first famous just around the first time I started learning guitar. Ever since I've learned every song she's released. I knew that anyone who was a fan of me and a fan of lady gaga would come.

So I was at Shaky's performing Lady Gaga covers. I started off rocking and singing "Judas". After going hard-core on "Judas", I went right to singing the acoustic live version of poker face. But I just played it as if it were my own. The way I played the guitar finger style was how I invented it. I didn't even need any background music for that. On my "Judas" I had a drummer that really kicked ass. Just when I got to the chorus of "Poker Face" I would hear the crowd go Gaga! As soon as I got halfway through the song, I pulled off my guitar, put it right on the stand, then had my good friend, Scotty McCreary, the winner of American Idol, start jamming on the guitar. As soon as he started jamming on his guitar, I told drummer to hit. As soon as my music music background sound rocking, I sing my own country rock version of poker face. It was a Country/rock version of poker face up-tempo. I was having so much fun, that as I was singing I was also moving my body. I was dancing up a storm. I felt like I was dancing in the moonlight.

After my whole performance that was country Gaga, I got off the stage to go get a drink. Where I was going to get a drink, some strange man walks up to me to give me compliments. "You were awesome. My students are a huge fan of you, Ms. Caroline." "Why, thank you, sir. I take it your teacher?" "I sure am. I teach at South Park elementary school." "No way! I mean, I'm sure your kids would be a fan of me. Lots of children like me." "I know. That's why I wanted to ask you if you would consider performing in my class sometime." My eyes exploded. "In your class? Why, sir, I don't know what to say!" He introduces himself, "The name's Garrison." "Garrison," I repeated as we shook hands. "I would be honored playing your class. I'm sure all of your students would love that." "That's awesome, Ms. Caroline. What do you say this Monday?" "Sounds good to me, Mr. Garrison. I know I will totally identify with these children as much as I do with many others." "Well then I got myself the right country girl." "I'll be there. Nice meeting you."

That nice man made my day! I get to perform for more sweet children. I wonder if Eric goes to that school. Or even the other boys.

Dear diary,

I had to get my ass up super damn early. My manager, Blake Shelton knew I wasnt gonna be at rehearsal at Shaky’s. I just felt pretty today. I was so excited I didnt fall back asleep like I did in high school.

I went right into South Park school at the same time as the teachers. This woman came up to me and said, "Hi. You must be Miss Sandy Caroline." "I sure am," I reply as we shook hands. She freezes her face for a moment and exclaims, "Oh, my God! I just shook hands with Sandy Caroline!" "And I shook hands with....," she introduces herself. "Principal Victoria." "You're the school principal? Oh, how wonderful. I am so happy to be playing here, Mrs. Victoria. I know all of your kids will have an awesome time!" I suddenly feel an arm around me. "Howdy, Miss C." I discover its that Garrison guy. "Mr. Garrison!" "They're setting up all the tech stuff in the gym." "I sure cant wait!" I discover that he's wearing a shirt with me on it. "Oh, my God! Where did you get that?" "They sell Sandy Caroline sweatshirts at Shaky’s." "I just dont know what to say!"

As soon as the school opens and everyone is coming into the school, i just hang out in the gym while everything's getting set up for the assembly. When class had just started, basically I got to do a demo performance. Mr. Garrison welcomed me in the classroom. I walked in as I heard the children applauding. "Thank you, Mr. Garrison. I'm glad you could make this all possible. Thank you all beautiful children for giving this wonderful man, Mr. Garrison, this awesome idea of me performing for all of you. I perform for children and teens all over the country. It means a lot to be invited to South Park Elementary. This has made my life!" I discovered that Eric and his friends are Mr. Garrison's students. "After the assembly, I'm giving autographs for all, including a picture with me!" The kids cheered and the little girls screamed.

I had my performance in the gym. It was all originals that time. Except for the last song, the older kids shouted "do a cover! whoo!"  So then after those 8 originals I sang, I covered "Only Girl" by Rihanna because I know that everyone loves it.

After the assembly, I got to meet more kids at recess. Stan introduced me to this little girl who he said is his girlfriend, Wendy. She looked like she couldn't breathe. "Are you okay, cutie?" "Wendy is a super fan of you. She thought there was no hope of meeting you." "Oh, that's so sweet." "Sandy Caroline," exclaimed Wendy. "You're real!" "Of course I'm real, silly." I pat her head and then she threw up. Stan was in a shock. He looked at me and goes, "That's what I always do when she kisses me. C'mon, Wendy." "No, Stan. I wanna hang out with Miss Caroline." "Oh, yeah, Stan. Why don't you keep your girlfriend company here." Stan didn't seem too happy. Kyle introduced the other kids. They introduced Token, Craig, Clyde, Pip, Tweek, and Jimmy. There was another kid they introduced. He was in a wheel chair. He just shouted out "Timmy!" I said, "I take it his name is Timmy." "Yes," said Stan. "He's handicapped but handicapable. He can't say anything but his own name." "Oh, well I understand. I have a developmental disability and I graduated on time. "Miss Caroline," said Jimmy. "I'm handicapable t-t-too. I tend to s--s-stutter a lot." "I stutter a lot too." "You reached your goal of c-country sing--ing, my dream is t-t-too be comedian." "No way, Jimmy. I always wanted to do stand up, but I'm only funny when im not trying to be." "You still got your t-t-talent." "Miss Caroline," shouted Tweek, hysterically. "Can I have your autograph on my mug." "Oh, Calm down, Tweek. Of course I'll sign your mug." "Miss Caroline, Tweek has ADD and he drinks a lot of coffee," added Kyle. I signed Tweek's cup, then say, "Everyone, lets go back to the gym and take every photo of us and get autographs!"

We all went back the gym and I got to have a picture taken with every child. We did all kinds of poses too. When I took a picture with Eric, he tried to kiss me but I stopped him by just hugging him to death.

My side

Dear diary,

I got a call from Mrs. Cartman 2 days later. She said that she's going out to a bar Friday night and needs a sitter. I told that I'll be there. I was so excited, I wondered what would happen the second date with Eric.

When I arrived at Eric's place, his mother was already gone. "Eric, did your mother leave you all alone so soon?" "Oh, you don't know my mom. She's so eager to go to bars it's not even funny." "Ooh. I had know idea she was like that. On another hand I'm kinda happy about it because she doesn't pay attention to our story." "Speaking of, Sandy, where are we going tonight?" "I don't have much in mind because I don't know South Park very well." Eric thinks for a moment. "What do you say we go to TGI Friday's and afterwards we can come back here?" Eric winked. "Hmmmm I actually like that."

So Eric and I went to TGI Friday's and we never shut our mouths the whole time we were there. Eric and I were sharing disgusting jokes and telling funny stories and giggling the whole time. He crawled to my side from under the table to sit next to me. "What are you doing?" I asked. "I couldn't help but want to sit next to you." "I've never sat next to anyone on a date. This is new." He rested his head on me and I felt the tingles inside. That strange feeling happened again. "Hey Sandy, are you ready to go back to my house?" so, I said yes and paid for our meal.

As soon as we made it home, walked in the house, Eric said, "Wanna come check out my room?" "sure." We went up to his room and he showed me around. "Oh, my God! You have a lot of what a kid could want." He says, "Sandy, come sit on the bed." The tingles were coming to me slowly as I sat on his bed. When I looked at him, he smiled and so as I was petting his head, he leaned closer to me. I started to lean closer to him, so I gave him a light peck. Then he started kissing my lips, so then we got hotter and heavier then the other date. I couldn't help but just grab his shirt because the tingles I was feeling got heavier and felt kinda warm. So while I was making out with him and holding onto his shirt, he started caressing my face and rubbed my neck a little. I laid him down and rested my hand on his stomach while I was kissing him. I stopped and laid next to him and said "Sorry. I just need to take off my vest." The vest I was wearing was beginning to be too much. I got it open but I was struggling to take it off. "Let me help you with that, darling." So he helped me take off the vest and he started kissing me while I was laying there. He laid his hand on my stomach and I kinda let out a moan. Suddenly, Eric puts his mouth on my neck. I wasnt used to having anyones spit on my skin. I flinched because i didnt kow what he was trying to do. He pets my head then I look up at the ceiling not worrying what Eric was about to do. I feel wetness from his mouth so it on one hand feels gross because of the spit but on another hand makes me more tingly inside. I start feeling suction from his mouth. Then all of a sudden I feel teeth. I took a deep breath to hold down the noises. On one hand, the teething felt pinchy but yet I felt way more tingly. When he stopped sucking on my neck, my neck felt numb. I just looked at him and smiled, then he continued making out slowly. We stop kissing and Eric says "Sandy, will you stand up for me?" I got up from the bed and stood there looking at him. "Sandy, what's that your wearing?" I go, "Oh, this? Its a tshirt." "I want that off." I was shocked. "Off?" "Yes, sweetheart. Would you take it off for me?" My hips were feeling like it was burning on the inside. It felt hot but yet felt good. On another hand, I wasnt used to showing my naked body to a boy. So I grabbed my shirt hesitantly and slowly pulled it up. Eric had an eager face wanting to see me with my shirt off. Finally I got it off me. I was on one hand self conscious, yet I was also feeling good. I tried looking away so Eric says, "Sandy aren't you forgetting something?" "What?" He asks, "What is that your wearing?" "Um, it's a bra." "Well, take it off. I wanna see those breasts." "Ok." So I undo my straps slowly and just pull the bra off like ripping off a bandage. Eric's eyes pop and he exclaims "Oh, neat!!"

Eric was just like playing with them. My nipples were mostly sensitive to his touch. When he started rubbing my nipples I start fidgeting because it felt kind of ticklish. I pinched my nipples to fight away the 'ticklishness'. He grabbed my hand to get me to stop pinching my boob. My nipples felt very unusual. I just took deep breaths to overcome the intensity of his touch. On another hand, I felt the same tingly feeling in my hips like before. I grabbed onto the pillow I was laying my head on at the same time as breathing. I felt his kiss on my breasts, so then the tingles I was feeling were really hitting the inside of my body.

As soon as we heard Mrs. Cartman holler "Eric, I'm home, honey!", I got up and put my all my tops back on, made out with him the last time then we both went downstairs. "How was your night, Mrs. Cartman?" "Fantastic, Miss C," she answers as she gives me a pat on my face. "That's great. I'm glad you had fun. So did me and your boy." "Did you enjoy your beer?" I paused for a second. "Excuse me?" "Beer is the best thing ever! You should try it." I looked at Eric with confusion. Eric breaks in and says, "Mom, I think you need to get some shut eye." As Mrs. Cartman walks up the stairs, she announces "There's plenty of beer." I look at Eric and ask him, "What is up with your mom?" "She's always like this on Friday nights. She's all about the beers." "Oh." So I look around the room, feeling speechless. "Are you okay?" he asked. "I'm fine, Eric," I said as I had the giggles. "How do you feel?" "I feel….Happy" "I can make you happier." "Really I don't know if I could  be any happier." "Oh you can because of me you'll see." I feel tears forming behind my eyes. "Oh, Eric." I gave Eric the last kiss on his lips and then headed back to the hotel.

Cartman's side

Dear diary

My mom asked Sandy to 'babysit' me Friday night because thankfully my mother is a dirty slut. My mom left the house before Sandy showed up. I was happy because I came up with a naughty idea. Since Sandy and were going to be alone and my mom was getting drunk, I decided that was my opportunity to see Sandy's bear naked breasts. When my mom left, my penis was hardening. I was sexually anticipated.

So then Sandy arrived. She was surprised when I told her that my mom is a dirty whore. Sandy couldn't think of what to do that night because she doesn't know south park that good. So I decided we go to TGI Friday's.

When we were sitting at that table, we were talking nonstop. We shared a lot of jokes and told funny stories. Especially all the funny stories about Kyle that kill me. She seems to take my side when it comes to Kyle. Every time i listened to her telling a funny story or joke, I felt those tingles again. Hearing her laugh really turned me on. Since I was having that sexual feeling, I couldn't help but crawl under the table to her side so I could sit close to her and her beautiful body. Just to be close to her made me happy. I was so damn eager to go back to my house because just like Kenny's personality, I wanted those boobs. As soon as we stepped foot in my house, I asked her if she wanted to check out my room. As we were stepping upstairs, my wiener started to feel warmer. When we entered my room, I just sat on my bed but Sandy looked around my room, going on about how cool my stuff is. As I was starting to feel harder, I told her to come sit with me on my bed. When Sandy sat on the bed she looked at me and smiled I smiled back. She started petting my head and it made me hard. So much for loving being close to her, I leaned towards her.I leaned closer, and she leaned closer to me too. When she came close enough, she gave me a light pack on my face. While she was still close enough, I started kissing her on her lips. After I started kissing her on the lips, she was kissing my lips back. We started making out hotter and heavier, very slowly. Slowly and hot and heavy enough that my penis got stiffer. While we were making out, Sandy grabbed onto my shirt again. I was turned on even more. I couldn't help but moan . I was especially turned on by hearing her moan. Since Sandy face was so beautiful, I started caressing it. I caressed Sandy's face and started rubbing her neck at the same time making out with her. When Sandy laid me down on my bed, I thought in my head "I got to see Sandy's tits". She suddenly stopped to lay next to me. I wondered what was going on. Sandy said that she just needed to take off her vest. Her very sexy vest. She was starting to look sexier with it off because I got to see more of her body. She was having trouble taking it off, so I offered to help her with taking off her vest very sweetly. After helping Sandy take off her vest, I continued making out with her slowly. I was just laying on top of her, resting my hand on her stomach. After making out with her a little more, I stopped and whispered "Sandy please stand up for me." She stood up and just stared. My wiener was starting to feel more erect. Just looking at her curvy body as she stands up. I tried giving Sandy a little bit of alert that I wanted her to take off her shirt. I just said "what is that you're wearing?" The answer I got was that it was a T-shirt. God, I knew that. I just told her to take it off just to get it over with. She looked really nervous. I hoped that she was going to take off her shirt and that I would get to see her t*ts. I really didn't want my penis to fall down again. She was lifting up her shirt very slowly. She was very hesitant about taking off her shirt but eventually she got it off. When she took off her shirt, she was kind of hugging herself like she was hiding her breasts. Luckily she was wearing a bra anyway. So then what did she have to hide? Next thing you know , I ask curious questions about her bra. I asked her to take it off. She was a little hesitant about taking off her bra . I did not understand what she had to be ashamed of. I am her boyfriend. She should not be embarrassed in front of her boyfriend. Finally she took off her bra. I finally got to see her half naked at the top. My eyes popped out and almost exploded. I exclaim, "oh, neat !"

Of course, I did not just want to see her tits. I wanted to touch them. I had her laying in my bed and I look at them for a couple of seconds. As soon as I lay my hands on her titties, she flinched. I wonder why she flinched. I hope that I wasn't molesting her. She checked with me to see if she was molesting me. If I don't acknowledge her monlesting me, then she shouldn't acknowledge me sexually abusing her. I wanted to make her feel loved. I felt loved just by being close to her. And by her letting me touch her. I touched her tit, and she stayed calm. She was looking up at the ceiling while I was just playing with her titties. As I continued caressing her titties, I also gave her tits a kiss. As soon as I started kissing her boobs, I hear my mom call. 

When Sandy and I went downstairs to see my mom, we went downstairs to find that my mother was drunk . She started saying weird stuff. She's offering Sandy some beer. Despite of the fact that I thought it was eccentric for what my mom was doing under the influence of alcohol, I was happy that she was intoxicated. Sandy was very confused. I told my mother that she needs to lay down and get some shut-eye. As soon as my mother went back up stairs I saw that Sandy was looking around the room . I was confused. I do not know why she still looked comfortable. I asked her if she was okay. She said that she is and that she just felt happy. I felt more sexually excited. I told her that I can make her more happy. She was so happy that she told me that she doesn't think that could be any happier. I beg to differ. I can make that woman happier than ever. I told her that she'll see how happy I can make her than ever . Seeing her happy made my wiener even more stiff.

After Sandy left , I have hopes of going further with her next date . Her naked top turns me on so much, but now I am interested in seeing the bottom. Especially her vagina. I've always been targeted for her vagina since the day I saw her perform at her concert at Shaky's. Oh my God! Sandy has the sexiest curvy body I've ever seen. But her crotch is way sexier. That's the female part I'm most sexually aroused by. Maybe one day, I will even get to stick my penis inside her.

Dear diary,

I went to my bus stop where Stan, Kyle, and Kenny were waiting. I was so hyper and very happy for yesterday. I couldn't stand still for a minute. Kyle had to be a Jewish asshole. "Cartman, what the hell is up with you, fat ass?" "Very typical for Jewish people to love bumming my joy." Stan chimed in . "Well, what are you so happy about, Cartman?" I didn't want to giveaway me and Sandy's personal affairs. "Oh, I just am." "No really Cartman," responded Kyle . "Why are you so happy all of a sudden? You are never this happy." I lied, "okay, I had 2 cups of coffee this morning." "You don't drink coffee fat ass." "Yeah Cartman," said Stan. "Stop making up reasons and tell us why you're happy." I sighed. "Okay, "I responded. "Are you sure you want to know?" "Yes, Cartman. We really want to know," replied Kenny. "Okay……," I hesitated for a couple of seconds. "Sandy showed me her tits last night." Stan, Kyle and Kenny were just staring at me with a shocked face for like 10 seconds. "Dude," exclaimed Kyle. "You have to be making this up." "Yeah dude," added Stan. "You are way too young for this shit." I smiled and said "I'm afraid I am not making this up." "This is TMI," commented Kenny. "Actually Kenny," replied Kyle. "This isn't TMI. We asked for it." "Yeah," said Stan. "We were begging Cartman to share what he was happy about and he did ." "I guess you are right," replied Kenny. "I guess we can't do anything about it, Cartman," says Kyle.""Yeah, dude," says Stan. "We really wish you and Miss Caroline the best." "Yeah, dude," said Kyle. "We feel very happy for you guys."

My side

Dear diary, 

Ever since yesterday, my body has felt confused. Reliving how Eric was touching me, I've been feeling very tingly again. I am so confused but yet feeling very tingly, I say that it feels pretty good. I feel like I would want that to happen again, even though I was a little bit humiliated by my body. Since Eric is just a little boy, he probably would not understand anything about dysmorphia. I love Eric so much and of course, I know  that showing him my body and letting him touch it makes him happy. I didn't get to see his body that time. I don't know how I would feel about it. At some point, as his girlfriend, I have to talk to him about my dysmorphia. I want to enjoy our time together. I checked with him to make sure I wasn't sexually abusing him. I feel like it would be very convenient for me if he checked with me. But on the other hand, I love doing this. I just love the way the tingles inside my body feel.

I'm glad that he asked me to show my top body rather than the bottom. I am more ashamed of my sexual body at the bottom then the top. I don't know what I would do if he ever asked me to take off my pants.

The problem is, one of the reasons why I am ashamed of my body is from sexual abuse. Also usually when a boy asks me to take off my clothes it's really for their own amusement. They always laugh at me when I am naked . Or even half naked. Luckily, Eric didn't laugh at me. I honestly don't know why he wanted me to take off my shirt. When I have had my encounters with women I never felt ashamed. I am not used to having affairs with men.

I was at rehearsal, in the house. While I was sitting at the table, I was still thinking about Eric. I couldn't help but feel the tingles inside my body. I was so nervous about the next time I have a date with him. The tingles that I was feeling, I feel like that they mean something. I don't know what. When I made out with Eric, I felt the tingles the most was right on my down area. It felt kind of hot. Even though it was hot, it was also a good feeling. I wasn't as social as I normally am. I wasn't feeling myself. My good friend, Monica who is my makeup artist and hairdresser for my performances just walked up to me and said, "Sandy, are you feeling okay today? You don't seem like yourself." Since I couldn't give away my relationship, (considering the fact that I am in a relationship with a boy who is just a kid), the hard part was that I couldn't get advice from anyone. So I said to Monica, "I can't talk about it." "Sandy, you can tell me anything." I said, "it's fine, Monica. I'll be fine." That was when I figured out that I could get advice from Stan, Kyle, and Kenny. Monica asks, "are you sure?" "Yes. I am positive." Monica just stands there and stares. "Okay, Sandy. If there's anything you would like to talk about, I am here for you." "Thanks, Monica. Right now, I would like to be alone." "Okay," replied Monica. So she walked away kindly. At rehearsal, I discovered that this weekend coming is cheerful song weekend. When I rehearsed my performance, I improvised a song about confusion. Improvise my own songs. I can't wait to express it this weekend.

Dear diary,

After rehearsal, I walked downtown to South Park and find the three of Erics friends hanging out on the sidewalk. "Hey, children." "Oh, hey, Miss Caroline," replied Kyle . "Guys, I have a question. Would you make fun of a woman taking off her clothes as of sense of humor?" "What do you mean," asked Kyle . "It's hard to say." "Miss Caroline , you said when we first met you that you acknowledge us to be your friends. If we are your friends then you can tell us anything." "Okay," I respond. "Here's a question that we wanted to ask you. Is it true that you showed Cartman your boobs?" I was shocked for a couple of minutes and stammered. "It's okay if you did," said Stan. I hesitated for a moment. "Um…… Well, yes." "That's all we wanted to know," said Stan. "Yeah. It was hard for us to believe," said Kyle. "How exactly did Eric tell you this?" "What do you mean," asked Kyle. "I mean, was he amused?" "Well, he was acting very strangely happy." "Well, I meant did he say anything to humiliate me?" "Miss Caroline," added Stan. "Why would you think that Cartman was trying to humiliate you?" "Because boys take nakedness as a joke." "Not really," added Kenny. "Kenny's right," said Stan. "Kenny looks at naked girls all the time and he never does anything to humiliate them or make fun of that." "Yeah" said Kenny. "The only amusement I get out of seeing naked girls is sexual arousal." "What is sexual arousal," I asked. Kyle said, "Miss Caroline, you are twenty years old. You should know this stuff." "Yeah, Miss Caroline. We are only kids and we know a lot of this stuff," added Stan. "I know. It's weird, but that's because of my developmental disability." "Oh," said Kyle. "I understand." "Aroused means excited about sex," answers Stan. I start to understand a little bit. "Let's put it this way," added Kyle. "When you were making out with Cartman or especially when you took off your shirt for him, did you feel any thing tingly in your body?" "How did you guess? That's exactly what I was feeling at the same time as being ashamed." "Well," replied Kyle. "You have nothing to be ashamed of. The tingles inside you are good when it comes to sexual activity." "Yeah, Miss Caroline," added Stan. "it's a good feeling. It should be all that you're feeling." "I have to say," I replied. "It did feel kind of good. The only thing is, I just don't know why I am ashamed of my body either way. It's a thing called dysmorphia." "Oh," responded Kyle. "We've all heard of that." Stan added, "you should talk to Cartman about it." I think a minute. "You know what? You're right. I should tell Eric. He's my boyfriend." "When are you seeing him again," asked Kyle. "I am waiting to hear back from Mrs. Cartman. I am hoping soon." My phone rings, so when I pick up the phone, guess who it is. It's Mrs. Cartman. "Speak of the devil," I say before I pick up. "Hello, Mrs. Cartman." She says, "Hello, Miss Caroline. How are you today." "I am wonderful. How's your little boy?" "I have never seen him so happy. As much as you made his emotions much better, you have made my life a lot better with the new Eric." "I feel so speechless." "That's good, Miss C. What do you think of watching Eric again tonight?" "Mrs. Cartman, I'm performing tonight and tomorrow. Remember?" "Oh, yes. How silly of me. I just dont have time for Eric even when he's done with his friends. You are the best thing that's ever happened to to him and I just need you to keep him busy." "That makes sense. I'm free every weekday after 2:30 pm." "That's wonderful, Miss C. That's when I do a lot of running around and Eric is home from school and hanging out with his friends." "Perfect! I'll be there!"

As soon as I hung up, the boys were just staring at me. I try to act as if I don't notice by asking, "So, are you gonna see me perform tonight?" "We'll see what we can do," Kyle says. I stop and look at Stan. "What?" "That," he responded without pointing anywhere. I didn't know what he was talking about. "What?" Kyle comes in. "Right there," Kyle said as he pointed at some part of my body. "On your neck." I felt my neck. I touch everywhere on my neck area. I felt one spot on my neck that felt somewhat numb and somewhat stung when you touch with firm pressure. "I do feel a little bit of something. I don't know what it is." "Have you looked in the mirror recently?" Asked Kyle. "Well I was right in front of the mirror when my friend Monica was doing my hair and make up for rehearsal. And I notice a couple of red spots on my neck." "And another question," said Kyle . "Did Cartman have any contact with your neck ?" I paused for a moment. "What exactly do you mean?" I asked . "Did he put his mouth anywhere near your neck?" I started stammering. I couldn't answer that question. "It's okay if he did," said Stan." Just be honest." "Well,… Yeah, I guess." "That's what caused the red spots," replied Kyle. I asked, "do I need to see a doctor?" "No," answered Kyle. "Its nothing dangerous. That's what happens when your boyfriend or girlfriend suck on your neck. Those are called hickeys." "Oh!"

Dear diary,

So had another performance at Shaky's. The theme tonight was hip hop/rap night where I sang my country versions of rap songs. Getting ready, Monica was straightening my hair and she asked me, "Sorry I'm asking this again, but is everything ok?" "It's all good, Monica."

Dear diary,

I just hung out with Eric again. As soon as I walked in his house, his mother was already gone again. I asked, "where's your mom off to now?" "She never says," replied Eric. I sat on the couch next to where Eric was sitting. "Wherever she is, I'm glad she's gone." I was just looking across the living room, at the TV that was off, and suddenly I feel Erics hands running through my hair. I started developing goosebumps. "You've got beautiful hair," Eric says in his soft voice. I look at him, and start blushing. I never like the way my hair looks when it's not straight. "I don't know," I say under my breath. "You do, Sandy. I love it like this better than how you have it when you perform." "Do you really?" Eric nodded his head, slowly. "This is my natural hair. I've always hated my natural hair. That's why I always have it straightened." "That's what makes your hair beautiful, Sandy. That's your natural beauty. You should always have your hair like this." "Oh, Eric. I'm speechless," I giggled. On top of the fact that my face was flushing, my eyes were tearing a little bit because I was really happy for what Eric was saying to me. Eric continued raking his hands through my hair. As he got closer to the scalp, I was feeling my goosebumps rise more. I tilted my head, so that he would get on the scalp. "Does that feel good," he asked in his soft voice again. I nodded my head slowly. Hearing him talk to me his soft tone of voice like thunder, made me feel more tingly in my stomach then in my hips. I don't know what it is about his thunder soft voice that lightens me up. The tingles I felt in my stomach area felt just as good as when I felt the tingles in my hips and on my down area. Eric started tickling my back from top to bottom. I puffed up my chest for a second and then relaxed. The goosebumps were getting to me. I love the way he was rubbing my back. I find it way better than how my mom used to rub my back.

Suddenly, Eric rest his hand flat on my thigh. "Sandy," he whispers, with his head rested on my arm. "My penis is hard." My eyes grew bigger than my body. "Oh?" He rested back on the couch, laid his hand on my arm and whispered "touch it." He grabbed my hand, picked it up, and dropped it right where his down area is. So my hand was laying right on his down area, so he presses my fingers against it.  As he was pressing my hand against his down area, he said to me, "When you do this, it feels good." So he let go of my hand, and I pressed against his down area myself. As I started to get comfortable with it, I started patting it softly. Then I start patting his… penis more firm. As I was patting more firm, Eric started grunting a little harder and said "okay, Sandy. That's good." But I didn't know what exactly he wanted. "Sandy, that's too hard." So he stopped me. "That's too intense." I said, "sorry." "That's okay, babe." So then Eric and I started making out very slowly. As we were slowly kissing, I felt the tingles on my hips and on my down area, so then I was moaning. So was Eric. When we stop kissing, I pet his head and smelled his hair . I don't know why, but there was something about the smell of his hair that I love. Somehow, the more I have gotten the tingles, the more I had the instinct start rubbing my head against his head. I rubbed my head against his head softly. Then I went harder. "What are you doing," he asked. "Headbutting you," I answered. "Why?" "Only because it turns me on." "Oh," he says. So then he starts headbutting me back. As we were headbutting each other, we would stop to make out softly, then go back to headbutting. While we were headbutting and going from there to kissing, I felt Eric's hand lightly touching the top of my thigh near my hip. I felt it go a little more on my down area. We stopped what we were doing and then Eric looks me in the eye and smiles. "Hey, Sandy," he said in his thunder-soft voice. "Can you open your fly for me?" I took a deep breath and blinked my eyes for a second. I scooted my ass down a little bit, looked at my down area then looked at Eric wondering why he wanted me to open my pants. Like I have said before, what is part of my dysmorphia is that I am more ashamed of my downer body then the top. "C'mon, Sandy. I wanna see your fly open." I undo the zipper part, then unbutton the top of my fly and leave it as is. After I took a deep breath, Eric took the two opening parts of my fly and spread it out, wide open. Wide open enough that my down area was sticking out, but luckily my panties were covering it. Very little of my hair was sticking out of my panties. Eric was just looking at it. I just looked at Eric and he smiled. I asked, "why did you need me to open my pants?" He answered, "I couldn't help but feel the need to look at the most feminine part of your body." At the same time as feeling goosebumps and tingles in my stomach and my down area, some little burning feeling in my mask area happened. Almost as if I'm going to sneeze. It was hard to take it. Then Eric said to me , "my penis gets harder seeing you with your pants and your panties sticking out." I started to feel tingles in my down area stronger. "Sandy I cannot resist the most feminine spot on you." As the tingles got stronger, I start moaning a little as reaction to what Eric was telling me. "Mmmmm, Eric," I whispered. "I never thought I'd love that one part of a female at this time. My penis is stiff as hell." I took a deep breath. "Oh, Eric." "What?" I got the giggles. "I don't know. I just feel.... happy. I'm feeling very tingly inside," I told him as I laid my hand on my stomach where I felt it. "Where do you feel it, babe?" I pointed at my mask area, chest, stomach, lower stomach, hips and my down area and told him that's where I feel it. "You know what that means?" "No. What?" He leaned his head against my shoulder. "It means I love you and you feel it." "Oh?" "Yes. It is love that your feeling." "I never realized how... ticklish love can be." "You know why it is? It's because the tingles your feeling is pieces of my heart tickling you inside your body. Especially right here," he told me as he pointed to my down area. I breathed in and exhaled with the giggles. "Do you feel loved?" "Yes." As I feel his hand coming near my down area, he asked "then how do you feel about me touching your vagina?" I inhaled again, then exhale. "That makes me happy too." "What do you feel down there?" "I feel heavier tingles on my down area." "You know what that is right?" "Yes. Love right?" He smiles and nods. As he was touching me there, I was just moaning a little bit . At first I was little sensitive to his touch but now at least touching it was better than him seeing. "Does that feel good?" He asks. "Sure does. I never realized love could feel this good on this part of my body." While he was touching me there, she just leaned over to me and started making out with me same time.

Eric stopped kissing me, and asked me "Sandy, now that I got you feeling the love, do you want to go downstairs?" I paused for a moment. "Wait. You have a downstairs? Down from here?" He says "yes, Sandy. I have the basement." "I had no idea you had basement." So he brings me downstairs to his basement. I looked around. I was like wow it's almost finished. As I was showing curiosity about basement, Eric says "Sandy could you sit here with me." I thought to myself  "he just loves to be close to me. I feel loved". Thinking that and feeling it gave me tingles. When I sit down, Eric sits on top of me just kisses my lips a lot heavier and stronger. He was kissing me slowly but heavy. It was too much for me. I was breathing heavily through my nose and moaning same time. I held on to him to try to push him away . I muffled "please stop just for one second." He continued making out with me and kissing my neck. "Eric!" I grabbed his head. "Eric, seriously! Please! Just stop for a sec!" He finally backed up for a second. As he was still sitting on my lap and I was holding on I just said to him, "sorry, Eric. I just need a moment to breathe" after I took a second to breathe I kiss Eric on his lips. He only kissed back for second and then scooted off my lap. "Sandy, why did you close your pants?" I paused for a second . "Because we're moving downstairs. I didn't want them to fall down.""Didn't want them to fall down, huh?" He just rubbed down area little bit over my jeans. "Babe will you open them again for me?" I opened my fly all the way and spread it out. "Just as beautiful as before." He started to grab the top of my jeans. I grabbed his hand and pushed him away. "Eric, what you doing?" "What do you think I'm doing? Don't you think there is a reason I wanted you to open your fly?" I was so uncomfortable. "You wanted me to take off my pants?" "Yes that's exactly what I want." 

I just looked down at the ground not knowing what to say. "What's wrong, Sandy?" "Oh, Eric," I say very nervously. "I didn't think I have to talk to you about this. You see I have this thing called dysmorphia. Do you happen to know what that is?" "No. Nobody will tell me." I sighed, "Eric, I know you're my boyfriend and you love me so I'm supposed to be comfortable with you, but part of my dysmorphia is that I am ashamed of my own body. Showing you my breasts wasn't too big of a big deal but I can't even show my doctor the bottom area." "Oh, well, how exactly did you feel when you took off your shirt for me?" "Well, I was just a little bit ashamed because I'm not used to showing boys my private body part . On another hand I did feel tingly inside and excited. I just don't know if I can take off the pants. That's what I'm most sensitive about." "Sandy," Eric says his normal tone of voice. "Somethings got to be wrong with you babe. Do you think I'm going to laugh at you or something? Because I didn't when you took off your shirt did I ?" I'm like "no". "Sandy, you know I love you. I know you feel the love from me. Do you love me too?" "Of course I love you, Eric." "Sandy, if you really loved me you'd consider just taking off the pants… For me." I really loved it when Eric was happy. Since I love him so much I might as well just to make him feel good. I didn't know if I could take it. It took a lot of guts. I was extremely hesitant. "Want me to help you out, darling?" I didn't answer but he helped me out a little bit. So far I got the top of my jeans to be at least right under my ass. Eric said to me, "come on, Sandy you're getting there." I took a deep breath. As Eric was helping me pull off my pants, I was just looking all the way at the ceiling so I don't have to watch. What Eric said to me only made me feel more embarrassed about my body. He probably is right. Maybe there is something wrong with me for feeling this way. When I finally got the top of my jeans down to my knees Eric said "you're only halfway there." So as Eric pulled my pants down further, I just kicked off my shoes. I finally felt them off. Eric was laying his hands on my kneecaps. That's the part I'm sensitive with feeling a touch. I flinched a little bit. "See? You're getting it." I giggled nervously. "Yeah I guess." He just touches my thighs rubbing them up to the top of that where my panties were. I not only just flinched because I was embarrassed and sensitive to his touch but yet I was sensitive to his touch in a good way. It was intense because of that extremely heavy tingles. "God, I love you, babe." He started rubbing on my hips. He had his face right near my down area. I did not know what the hell he was trying to do. So I kind of just flinched a little bit. I looked up all the way at the ceiling again so I don't have to see what I feel. I felt firm pressure against my down area. Felt just like when I masturbate. Only it was Eric. He had to be using his hand over my underwear. I felt the tingles right on the part down there that starts with a V. It was more intense right there then when I normally have it in that body part. I kind of panted little through my nose. I moaned softly. "Sandy, how do you feel?" I thought about it for a second. "I don't know. Kind of feels like that love feeling you're talking about." "That's exactly what it is, baby." "Mmmmm. It's a lot of tingles. It is really a lot. Think you could hold back?" The tingles were getting a little bit intense. "I don't think so, Sandy." "Why? It feels really ticklish." "That's how it's supposed to feel, baby. There's no such thing as too much love." "Is love really supposed to feel this ticklish?" "Yes baby."

After Eric was pressing against my down area for a while, he asks, "that feel good?" I say "yes." "Do you feel love?" "Yes, Eric." I said softly. As Eric leaned his head on my bare lap, then gives it a soft peck, he asked what he asked before. "Do you love me?" I said, "yes, Eric," in a soft tone of voice. He asks in his soft tone of voice; soft as thunder, "Then will you take off those panties?" I really felt like I had no choice but to say yes and do it. So I pulled them down slowly without his help. When I had my panties pulled down to the knees, I saw a wet stain on the part that was in between my legs. I exclaimed, "oh my God!" He asks, "what's wrong, Sandy?" "I don't remember ever peeing in my pants these days. I'm twenty years old." "Let me see," he says. I felt even more ashamed as he was looking on the inside of my panties. "Darling, that's not pee." "Well, what else would it be?" "Sandy, Sandy, Sandy," he replies. "You are not a very smart girl." "I know." "Well that's okay, baby. What you're seeing in between your legs is what comes out of your vagina. It all happens from the tingles you feel inside you." "So love can make me pee?" "No baby. I told you that's not pee. All the tingles you're feeling inside which is love melt and fall onto your panties." "But then why am I still feeling?" "I give you more love and it produces again your body." I was shocked to be hearing new information.

When I finally got my panties off, I just looked across the room. Even just looking at Eric would make me more self-conscious. Eric told me to spread my legs and lift them onto the couch I was sitting on in the basement. I thought to myself "oh now is he going to look at my V word?" At the same time my mind and my body was thinking two different things. In my head I was very self-conscious of showing my body to Eric. My downer body felt tingly about it as if it wanted to show off to a boy. I was just feeling my hair as if I was fixing it like I wasn't paying attention to anything that happened. That's what I always do when I'm nervous. The part that I was really embarrassed about down there was the hair on my down area. The minute I felt Eric's hand lay on the hair part of my down area I really tried holding down the flinching. I asked him "what are you doing, Eric?" "Just relax," he says. On top of the fact that I was self-conscious, I also felt a little warm feeling along with the tingles on my V word. For some reason his thunder soft voice really made me tingly inside. "Sandy," after he said my name he moans a little bit. "You know what I'm feeling?" "No. What?""I'm feeling my wiener get harder by the minute." I feel my V get warmer inside my down area when he said that. "My penis feels so hard I just feel like, you know, letting it loose." "What exactly do you mean?" He sighed and said "Sandy, look at me." So I just had to stop looking across the room at the ceiling and look at him. "Baby, do you want to look at wiener?" I just paused to think about it. While I was in pause mode, Eric just stands there smiles at me. He says "babe, I'll take it out right now." I look at him and say "okay sure." I was a little nervous about that. Eric opens up his fly and pulls out his thing. That thing sticking out of his pants was very shocking to be seeing in person. I just looked at it for a second then right across the room. He says "see how hard it is? This is how I felt since the day I first laid eyes on you at Shaky's." I inhale and exhale and moan a little."Oh Eric." I said. He says "open it a little more." I go, "What?" "I just wanna see it." I scoot down a little more and spread my legs wider. I feel Eric grab my hand and put it on something warm. It felt like as if I was touching a part of his skin that's red. I couldn't make it out. I ast, "Eric, what am I feeling?" "Oh, Sandy, something I dnt want you to stop feeling." He let go, so then I looked at where I was feeling. What I was touching was his P word. He holds onto his "P" and lays it on my "V". He just lets his thing rest on mine. His thing made my "V" feel warm on the outside like how it was already warm on the inside. My goosebumps felt heavier and higher. He moved the tip of his "P" onto this thing on top of the hole of my "V" that increases the tingling. He just pressed against that part with his thing then slowly let it rub down. I touched his "P" while it was still on top of my down area. I just rubbed his "P" and it was straightening a little. The tip of his thing ended up pressing up against the skin under my "V" but above my rectum. I was sooo confused. I thought to myself, "What the hell is he trying to do?" It felt like as if he was trying to have sex with me.

As soon as the P word was getting close to the hole of my "V", I hear my cell phone going off. While his thing was still on my thing I pick up the phone and its Blake Shelton, the host singer at Shaky's. "Hello?" "Miss Caroline, it's Blake Shelton calling. The boss who runs Shaky's wants to have a word with you immediately." "What does she need me now for?" "There's been a change of plans on the theme. She wants the theme to be Adele covers." I pause shockingly. "Adele!" "Yes, C. Mrs. McArdle needs you there now." "Oh, ok. Tell her ill be there in a few." I hung up the phone and said, "Eric, unfortunately I have to see the boss of Shaky's. It sounds like an emergency." Eric was not happy. "What? But Sandy, we were just getting close to the fun part." As I was putting my pants back on at the same time as feeling bad, I told him "I know, Eric. I was looking forward to it. But this is really important. I'll be seeing you a lot, right?" "That is true. Next time you let me get that part?" "Of course," I told him. I looked at him and smiled. Then we made out for a little bit before I left. I whispered to him as soon as we were done making out, "I love you so much."

I arrived at Shaky's. Monica was there. "Hi Sandy." "Oh hey, Monica. What brings you here?" "Your change of plans for the performances weekend." Blake Shelton called me over. "Miss Caroline, Mrs. McArdle is ready for you." We all sat at the table with all the people I rehearse with. We had something like a conference meeting. "Ms. Sandy Caroline, I understand that this weekend you were supposed do your own songs about your feelings. Am I right?" Asked Mrs. McArdle "Yes ma'am," I replied. "I am such a huge fan of Adele and I know that you like to do covers, yes?" "I sure do love performing covers, Mrs. McArdle. I'm not much of a fan of Adele but if you're such a huge fan then I have no issue covering Adele this weekend." "That is exactly what I wanted, Ms.C. I would be honored if the theme for this weekend performance would be Adele covers." "Yes ma'am. I know a lot of Adele songs by heart." "In that case, would you mind playing some songs for me?" I asked, "right now?" "Yeah just a couple of verses. It doesn't have to be perfect. That's why we have rehearsal." "Okay then." Luckily I had my guitar with me so I played some parts of "rolling in the deep". After I played some Adele for Mrs.McArdle she said that she absolutely loved it. "I know you will do a wonderful job this weekend," said Mrs. McArdle.

Dear diary,

So next time at rehearsal, first I played basic songs of Adele. Then, Mrs. McArdle  said that she wanted me to perform "Rumor Has It". So then Blake Shelton hired some backup singers. It was so much fun experimenting with many of Adele's song. The only problem was, at rehearsal I was thinking about what just recently happened to me and Eric. Eric had his "P" near my birth canal. I don't see what a man has on a woman's birth canal unless they're going to have sex. Eric and I did not have sexual intercourse. He just touched my "V" with his thing. I am so damn confused. I don't know what Eric was performing on me but for some reason that felt good that time and make me feel tingly right on my birth canal. Yet, I felt uncomfortable. Even though I was embarrassed to expose myself to him, I feel like I would do that again. I feel like I would want him to use his thing down there to touch my thing again.

While I was singing at rehearsal, I was thinking about what Eric and I were doing at the same time. I was reliving it just as I was belting out and dancing singing out always helps me with my emotional problems. I love him, so I can almost never get him off my mind. I somehow feel like I want his thing to go in my birth canal. I don't know if that's necessary. Despite of the fact that I hate showing him my privates, it really felt good having him touch them.

I am so confused. When I see Eric's friends, I should ask them for advice. Those boys are younger than me and they know all about this stuff. Sometimes I feel like somethings wrong with me. It's just getting to me. It took my love for him to be able to do what he wants despite of the fact that it made me uncomfortable. I just love pleasing him. I just feel even more tingly when I see him happy. I hear his laugh and I feel the burning in my mask area. His laugh really gets me going. I've noticed that he just loves to be close to me. He always has his head near my body. I don't know why somehow I get tingles just knowing that he loves to be close to me. I love being close to him just as much.

Dear diary,

After Mrs. Cartman gave me her last call about the next time I "babysit" him, I went downtown to South Park and got to see Stan and Kyle. Kenny, I reckoned was busy. Stan and Kyle are such nice boys, I figure I take advice from that. "Hi, Stan. Hi, Kyle. How are you boys doing?" "We're doing just fine, Miss Caroline." Replied Kyle. "Oh, that's great for you boys. I am confused." "Again?" "I talked to Eric about my dysmorphia." "You did," ask Kyle. "What did he say about it?" "Well, he really wanted me to do it. I just love it when he's happy so I did it because I love him." " Did what ," asked Stan. "What did he want you to do." "This time, I took off my pants for him." "Miss Caroline," added Kyle. "You don't have to take off any of your clothes off for him." "I know, but yet somehow I also wanted to. I'm embarrassed about my downer body more then the top, and very ashamed of exposing myself to a boy, but yet I felt the tingles just doing it and on the other hand I kind of liked what he was doing to my body. I somehow kind of felt loved just to be pleasing him because what he was doing was pleasing me too." "I see," replied Kyle. "I can see that your body is confused also." "Yeah I guess it is because I have 2 sides." "What was he doing to you anyway," asked Stan. "Well, he was doing a lot of things to me. At first I just  have my fly open and he was rubbing my down area." "Mmhm, go on" commented Stan. "Also I touched his thing in his down area a little bit." "Do you mean his…um… Penis," Asked Kyle. I was shocked to hear the real word. "Ewww! And yes." "What's ‘ew’ about that?" "Never mind. The last thing that happened which is the part that I am most confused about, is when I took off my pants I exposed my down area to him. He touched..... um... my bare birth canal with his thing down there, not his hands." The two boys were trying to clear their minds of what I'm getting at. "Ohhh!!" Exclaimed Kyle. "So what your saying is, is that Cartman had sex with you." "No, you guys!" I was really frustrated that he didn't get me. "Ok. Sorry, Miss Caroline." "Boys, he didn't stick his thing inside my ... 'V'. He laid his, um, 'P' on top of my 'V'. He used his down thing to touch the outside of my 'V'." The boys paused there faces for a moment then both exclaimed, "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!" "Okay," replied Kyle. "So basically, Cartman didn't exactly have sex with you. He just used his penis to touch your vagina on the outside. Is that what you said?" "The way you put it, yes." "Miss Caroline, why do you put it the way you do?" "It's not appropriate to use those words. I think it's more sound to use words that define it." "Miss Caroline," added Stan. "The word 'penis' and 'vagina' is the scientific term for those body parts." "Yeah. Plus, you're twenty years old so you're mature enough to use those words. It's not inappropriate at all." I said, "But my mother says its not okay to say that in public." "First of all, your mom's not here," responded Kyle. "Second of all, we're your friends right? So, it's okay to say that to close friends. Just not random people." "Oh, I see. Just, I can't get it out. I hold back from saying it." "You dnt have to be afraid to say it. You won't get in trouble," said Stan. "Yeah, you'll feel better when it's off your chest," said Kyle. "Try saying 'penis' now. Take your time." I took some deep breaths and tried closing my eyes. I try mouthing it first. Then lightly whispered the word and made the whispers stronger and stronger. Then just used a soft voice. "Miss Caroline, say it again," exclaimed Kyle. I kept my eyes shut tightly, puffed out my chest, and just said out loud "PENIS!" I opened my eyes! "You said it! You can say penis!" Exclaimed Kyle. "Do you think you can try saying the opposite?" So I basically used the same technique as the word "penis". I finally got the word "vagina" off my chest and I felt a lot better.

"Okay, so the problem with term usage is solved. I still need to overcome my dysmorphia so I can just feel loved and tingly." "Okay, Miss Caroline," replied Kyle. "It sounds like your interested in being sexual with Cartman, but apparently your too nervous to expose yourself. So it's making it hard for you to explore your sexuality. Is that the case?" "Yes, Kyle." "Okay. I just wanna assure you that you don't have to undress if you don't want to. It's your body. But if you do, well, I would suggest you just do what you're comfortable with and turned on by doing for now. If you ever feel your ready to pursue further, then that's your choice. Just don't do what you're not comfortable with; just do the things you are aroused by and comfortable doing. Don't do things just because the one you love wants you to." I thought about it for a second. "Well, I guess I can try that. And Kyle and Stan, I have to say that at the same time as having a boyfriend who's way younger than me, the way I see it I've got a couple of great friends as two young boys." And then I smile at them. After they both smiled back, I had to head back to the hotel.

Dear diary,

When I made it back to the hotel, I immediately took a relaxing shower to wash off all of this confusion. As soon as I got out of the shower, I dried my hair with towel, thoroughly, then crawled into my bed, naked. I opened the drawer of my night stand and took out my little mirror. I opened my legs and looked at my...... vagina.... to see if there is anything to be ashamed of and if there's anything Eric put on it with his.... penis. I saw the love that Eric was talking about from the tingles that was melted exiting the hole of my vagina. I think, "so that's what love looks like". I just looked at my vagina trying to see what boys like about it. Before I met Eric, I loved looking at other women's vaginas because I thought they were beautiful. I guess that's how Eric felt about mine. Maybe he wasn't gonna humiliate me. Maybe showing him my breasts and my vagina isn't so bad. I touched my own breasts and felt my nipples where Eric was touching them. That was where it felt most ticklish. I touched them lightly to try to get used to that feeling. The center part of my nipples rised. I gave them a little pinch too.

I threw on my panties and sports bra, and just watched some TV with some relaxation. I needed to rest my with this confusion.

Cartman's side

Dear diary,

So my goal is to officially have sex with Sandy next time I see her. When Sandy came over I was home alone again. I was getting so damn hard knowing I was alone with Sandy. I just made some light moves and started small. I started by feeling the beautiful features I always see on her. I could tell she left her hair natural. I couldn't help but feel it. I hear that women fall for your sexual move when you tell her she's beautiful. I just told her she has beautiful hair and her face was blushing. As soon as she seemed flattered, I was ready to tell her that my penis was so damn hard because of her. I told her how beauty makes my wiener stand up. I just needed to feel her touch on it, so I took her hand, dragged it onto my penis and held her hand there. While I was holding her hand on my wiener I pressed her hand against it and mmmmmh that felt good. So then I asked her to keep doing it. She went a little too hard eventually so I asked her to stop. Mmmmmh, I love the way she was rubbing my head. Then she started to rub her head against mine. I was confused at first but as soon as she explained that she was head butting me, I was completely turned on. I stopped kissing her and asked her to open her fly for me. I wanted to see her panties so damn bad. I'm already appealed by her beautiful crotch with her skinny tight jeans on. I can't tell you how erect my wiener was when she opened her fly and I ended up spreading it out and I officially got to see what was behind those jeans. Just how stupid was she for not knowing why I wanted her fly open. She is just as beautiful as she is stupid. I got to see her crotch with her pants and her panties on, but the next step was to see every piece of it before I can make my penis enter her vagina. The part that made me feel good is rubbing on her vagina over her panties. When she told about how she felt the tingles in her stomach and her vagina, I came up with the best lie to get the pleasure I want! I told her that everything she feels is from my love towards her. Oh, my God! I'm glad she's stupid. Filling her head with things to get what I want, I was really pulling it off. She really believe that the tingles were pieces of my heart tickling her inside.

As soon as she was feeling loved, I was finally ready to get to the real part in the basement. As soon as we got down, I sat on top of Sandy and made out with her heavily. As I was kissing her neck, she needed to take a breath. So then I wondered why her pants were closed. She said that she didn't want me to fall down which pissed me off but I kept it together. I told her to undo them again. As soon as she opened those pants I asked her to take them off. She told me about how she had this thing called dysmorphia where she hates her body. I told her to suck it up and take off the pants. She was taking forever to take em off so I wondered if she was going to. Her pants were off but her panties were on so I had to please her into taking her panties off. I, of course did love her sexy panties. She finally did even though she has body issues. So I told her to put her feet on the bed and spread her legs in a frog position. I officially got to see that beautiful vagina of that country singer. Oh, my God! I've been waiting to see it since I first saw that crotch of hers at Shaky’s. I finally got to see her whole, bare vagina. It was wet as hell just how I expected. She ended up asking me what the secretion was and I had to lie about the love thing again. She thought she peed in her pants. She was so funny. She's an idiot.

Meanwhile, I started to get in the process of having sex with her. I had her touch my wiener a bit. I laid my penis on top of her vagina just warm her up a little before I insert my wiener inside. I think to myself, "Yes! It's finally come!" Just as soon as the tip of my dick is heading inside, Sandy ends up getting a call. I thought "Hurry it up, girl." As soon as she hung up, it turned out she had to go. I'm just like, "but we were getting so close to the fun part!" It turned out it was her manager Blake Shelton, so she didn't have a choice. She said that she would get to the fun part next time for sure. How should I believe a woman. She kissed me goodbye before she left so I pretended to be nice.

Dear diary,

As soon as Sandy officially left the house, I took the opportunity to yell, "Goddamn it! No!" I am so fucking pissed off that I did not get 100% of what I want. Okay, I got to see her wet vagina, but seeing it is not the same! I didn't get my pleasure! My dick is sad. It is dry and sad. Went from totally-standing erect to sagging down. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't help but walk into my mom's room and slash of the cock of her love doll figure of Leonardo DiCapprio. I chopped it like chopping a carrot. I was proud of it but I was still not happy.

Dear diary,

I just stayed wrapped up in my blanket like a cocoon in the closet, especially when my mom came home. I heard her scream as soon as she was upstairs. She came in the room and I heard her call my name. Unfortunately she found me in the closet. "Eric Theodore Cartman, what is the meaning of this?" I just say, "I guess Leo DiCapprio lost his cock." "Why didn't you tell Miss Caroline that Leo is mine, young man?" I was so shocked that my mom believed that Sandy did it. "Sandy didn't do it! I did, mother!" "You?" "Yes! I chopped it like a carrot! Penises are carrots! I guess Leo feels my pain!" "What are you talking about, Eric? You know how much I love Leo DiCapprio." "I guess you feel my pain too! Now it's run-your-mouth-on-Eric time! Okay!" My mom finally had sympathy. "Honey, did something happen when Miss Caroline was over that you need to talk to mommy about." "What good is it to talk to you? You are no help! It's none of your business and for the most part you are too busy sleeping around to care!" I turned around to take a deep breath. "Mom, just leave me alone. Okay?" She finally left me alone.

Dear diary,

I was at the bus stop with the guys, all pissed off. I did not wanna talk to anyone today. I did not play at recess, sat by my lonesome at lunch, I was all anti social today.after school, while Stan and Kyle went to hang out down town, I just went to get ice cream because I needed it. It cost me a fortune but it was worth it.

On the way back home, Stan and Kyle came up to me and Kyle said to me, "Cartman you've been ignoring us all day." "Yeah," added Stan. "Can't you tell us what's wrong?" I sighed, "Alright. If you're so desperate I suppose I should tell you if you really wanna know." "We're listening," said Stan. I sighed again, "you guys, my dick is sad. It was standing, but then it sank." "Okay, Cartman," replied Kyle. "What are we talking about?" "I was so Goddamn close! So close! Only one inch away! And I took a fall!" "What are you talking about, Cartman," asked Kyle, more firmly. "My dick was just about to enter the warm, moist cave! Just as it's getting close, Sandy has to skip out because this Blake Shelton guy has to call her in the middle of the biggest moment! Then he tells her to get her ass to Shaky’s!" They both pause and look at me, then Kyle says, "I think I know what you're talking about! Miss Caroline told us that you touched the outside of her vagina with your penis. Is that what happened?" "Sandy told you? What exactly did she say?" "All she told us, Cartman, is that you had your penis on top of the outside of her vagina and that it gave her the tingles." "She would've gotten more tingles right there if that Western asshole hadn't called that no-brained woman, and I had gotten to have my penis inside her vagina not on top of it!" Stan and Kyle stared at me. "Wait a minute," reacted Stan. "When you were laying your cock on top of her twat, you were actually trying to have sex with her?" "No. I just laid my cock on top of her vagina because I wanna be retarded. Yes, you stupid ass!" "Cartman," exclaimed Kyle. "You ignored everyone all day ..... over sex?!" "Yes because Blake Shelton had to blow up her goddamn phone!" Kyle had to run his Jew ass mouth on me. "Cartman, Miss Caroline has a singing career. She had to do something important. I don't know what it is but if she had lost her job, I don't see how you can live with yourself." "Kyle, you're such a Jew." "Kyle is right, fat ass," said Stan. "It's already enough that you could've interfered with her career but you have confused her body and pressured her into serious things that she is apparently not ready for." Fuck Stan too. "Oh, really guys. I'm Eric Cartman; I always get what I want." "You have got to be kidding," blabbed Kyle. "You should be happy that you have a girlfriend who, better yet is a famous country pop singer!" "Yes. A famous country singer with a country body." Kyle just stairs at me and says, "Cartman, don't be like Kenny. He's a bad role model." "If he steals my beloved Sandy then he sure is." "Cartman!" "Oh, look at the time. Well, screw you guys; I'm going home."

Dear diary,

Fortunately, my mother set up another "babysitting" time. I was happy at least because this might be my chance to get her. My mom said that she was gonna talk to Sandy to find out why I'm upset but Sandy is not gonna know either. I will hunt Sandy down. I'll make her feel good just much as myself!



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