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Insecure	By : overthestars Category: +G through L > Invader Zim > Slash - Male/Male Views: 1656 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Invader Zim, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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***Invader Zim, and all related characters, names, etc., are copyright Jhonen Vasquez.
I write for entertainment only, and do not make a profit from his work.
Jake is an original character.***
Is anyone else writing their stories with some sort of outline or plan? I’m not. I don’t think I thought this out well enough, and I’m afraid I’m writing myself into a wall…fast. So if any of the chapters start to seem random or weak, that’s probably just me gathering my thoughts. -Sigh- I’ll work on it.
*****
Chapter Three: Trade
Zim mumbled in his sleep, eyes shut tight and fists clenched. He growled and thrashed his head from side to side as tears welled up in his eyes. Violently, he clapped his arms around himself and screamed. Zim gasped to replace the air the scream stole and rolled over, only to violently strike his head against cold metal. The Irken whimpered and hesitantly opened one eye to inspect the object.
“Hiiee!” Gir greeted excitedly, green eyes lighting up to illuminate the room and his master’s face momentarily.
As the room became dark again, Zim let out a sigh of relief. He blindly reached out for Gir and weakly brought the small robot to his chest. “I’m glad you’re functioning again,” Zim mumbled quietly.
Slightly muffled in the embrace, Gir said, “You was all, ‘No! No!’ during dreamtime!” The small robot’s eyes suddenly flashed red, “And I was all, ‘I’ll protect you!’ Then I put on my cape and saved the day! You can thank me by making me a sammich!” Gir giggled and squeezed Zim affectionately.
Nightmares again… Zim growled inwardly at himself in disgust. Shuddering in the cold, Zim stared down at what he could make out of his ‘heroic’ companion. He smiled and curled around Gir. “I will as soon as I can.”
“Yay! I want turkey – no! Emu! Wait…no. Yes! Five types of bread! And…um…Skettios! And…”
Zim sighed contentedly, listening as Gir’s ‘sammich’ soon became a feast.
After a few moments of Gir’s meal request, there was silence. Zim started to drift off when he felt Gir slipping out of his hold. Startled, Zim clutched at the small robot, heart racing and teeth bared.
“But Master!” Gir squirmed. “I cants breathe!”
Zim didn’t reply, still holding his breath from the scare. When he was sure they were alone, Zim loosened his grip. Lifting an antenna, Zim pointed out, “Gir, you don’t NEED air.”
“Oh yeeahh…” Gir giggled. “I loves—”
The room was blindingly bright as the door was unexpectedly thrown open. Zim squinted and Gir gasped in excitement. “Gir!” Zim looked down at his robot, tears in his eyes. “Think of something nice, okay?”
“Like, squirrels? I misses them so! Master, have you seen the squirrels jump? Oh! And they like to swish their tails, and—”
Zim quickly reached into Gir’s head compartment and fiddled with a makeshift power switch he had been working on. He held his breath as Gir’s eyes dulled and his smile relaxed. Zim smirked – truly he was amazing.
“SLAVE!”
Zim jumped at the outburst and failed to keep Gir securely in his arms as the large beast above him ripped the inactive robot away. Zim whispered sorrowfully, “It won’t hurt this time…” He watched helplessly as Gir was hurled into the wall behind him. Zim still felt his throat tighten at the sight. He refused to cry, however.
“Well, seems like he’s not in the mood to make noise today. Let’s see about you.” The behemoth reached down and grabbed Zim roughly by the neck. Three sharp claws pierced the Irken’s skin and Zim whimpered before struggling weakly. “Now, now. Don’t move too much, we wouldn’t want you to hurt yourself.”
If he had the energy, Zim would have spit in the bastard’s face.
“You’re lookin’ a little thin, Irk child. As a proud Spaackt, I can’t allow that. We’ll get you something to eat. But! It’s a full moon,” Zim was jerked to the blue-skinned creature’s eyelevel. The muscled freak’s breath was foul, and Zim turned his face away as much as he could. “So you get to watch your little friend for awhile. Won’t that be nice?” The Spaacktian released his hold on Zim, only to catch him by the antennae before he hit the ground. Zim bit his tongue to keep from screaming as pain shot down his spine. He tried to reach the floor to relieve the strain, his toes just barely scraping at the rough ground. There was a high-pitched beep, and a small communicator set on the Spaacktian’s trim waist came to life.
“Notam, get the Irken in here already! I’m late for a lunch appointment with Linna.” There was a loud click, and then silence.
Notam growled. “He always acts like I’m wasting his precious time…” He looked at Zim and grinned darkly. He suddenly backhanded Zim, keeping a firm grip on his antennae.
Zim cried out as his lower half swung away from his antennae with the force of the strike. He made a small noise and reached up to grab the hand keeping him off the floor.
“Touch me, slave, and you’ll regret it.”
Zim paused at the threat, breath uneven. The energy to keep his hands up faded and they fell to his sides.
Smirking, Notam shoved Zim to the ground and began dragging him. “Let’s go watch us some tv.”
[][][][][]
As they came up to a door labeled Monitored Subjects, Notam finally stopped dragging Zim, and lifted him, grabbing his neck again. The Irken’s small relief was short lived as he was forced into the door as a means of opening it. As soon as the air had rushed out of him, the Spaacktian tightened his hold on the slim throat, smearing the green blood. Zim choked, and his sore antennae flattened against his head submissively. He continued to struggle for air as Notam entered the room leisurely.
“Here’s the worthless—”
A slender Spaacktian looked up with a disgusted look from a screen displaying a female of the same race. “Put him down already and let’s get this over with.” Turning back to the screen, he smiled. “Linna, this will only take a few minutes. I’ll see you soon.” Linna smiled and winked before the connection was closed.
Zim’s vision was black around the edges, and the tunnel he was currently looking through throbbed as Notam squeezed in irritation. Notam tossed the scrawny Irken aside and sat down next to his coworker without saying a word.
Landing hard on his side, Zim didn’t have the strength needed to curl up in the fetal position he so desired. His throat repeatedly failed to assist in his attempts to breathe. Choking almost too severely for the following gasps to give him any air, Zim clutched weakly at the thin clothing covering him.
“Oh, for the love of…” The thin Spaacktian hurried to Zim’s side and knelt next to him.
Fearing something worse, Zim tried to push away. His effort was less than successful, and he was gently pushed up into a forty-five degree angle; legs still sprawled out on the floor. His torso was stroked caringly as his breathing evened out. The touch, however, reminded the broken Irken of unspeakable experiences he’d had since arriving here, and he began hyperventilating.
“What have you been doing to this Irken?” The Spaacktian leaned away from Zim to stare questioningly at Notam. Zim took advantage of the space given to him and pulled himself toward a corner.
Shrugging, Notam started up a new monitor screen. “I’m not the only one that deals with him, Kinlin,” he said through clenched teeth.
Kinlin felt sick.
Zim stared unseeing at the wall before him, reliving a recent violation. Kinlin rubbed at his temples in silence, glaring at the floor, “I seriously doubt this is what his rulers expected when they made the trade, Notam.”
“Is that so? Well I’m sure if they cared enough in the first place, they would have just given us the requested information instead. Those damned freaks.” Notam pounded the control desk with a huge fist, “It was in no way a fair trade! They gave us the most defective ‘Invader’ they had. This reject’s only good for one thing, and if it wasn’t for that Earthling, it wouldn’t obey us at all…”
Kinlin sighed. They didn’t have the ability to truly hurt the Earth being, but the lie had been enough to get the Irken to be cooperative. Kinlin felt sick again; how many times was this innocent creature going to be lied to? He glanced at the blank-faced Irken and made his way over to him. “Hey, Zim, let’s…get this done with, and then we can go eat. That’d be good, right?” Kinlin reached for Zim, and once he touched the detached Irken, Zim shot up to his feet.
“No! Stop it! Leave me—” Zim pitched forward suddenly, moaning as his strength left him.
The lithe Spaacktian was on his feet instantly, and softly caught Zim, eyes filled with concern. He stood stiffly for a moment, not sure what to do.
Zim blinked several times, finally free of the hellish memory. He just wanted to go home…
Kinlin frowned as something started to soak his white uniform. Looking down, he watched as the green creature crying soundlessly into his chest. He cleared his throat, unintentionally making Zim tense up. “Uh…Notam, go…get me a bottle of Red Star.” Kinlin smirked as his colleague growled behind him and muttered expletives directed toward him. After the door slammed, Kinlin lifted Zim. “Shh… I swear things are going to be different now.”
Zim whimpered, but relaxed in Kinlin’s hold. The Spaacktian set him down before the various monitors and quickly began typing as Zim’s tears slowed. “Let’s take a look at your friend, um…”
“Dib,” Zim choked out.
“Yeah, Dib.”
“I…” Zim swallowed hard. “I’ve made him suffer…”
Kinlin swiveled around in his chair to look at Zim in disbelief. How could this creature still be more concerned by an alien’s well being over his own?
Zim looked to the floor in shame. He hated the moon cycle his observations of Dib were scheduled to. They roughly equaled two Earth months, but time here seemed to pass so much slower. Zim didn’t want to have to continue watching Dib slip deeper into depression. The boy would go without eating or sleeping for days, and Zim couldn’t help but feel that the treatment he was receiving was justly deserved. If only he hadn’t given into his desire to befriend the unique human. If he had remained his enemy, Dib would have probably been more than happy to find Zim gone. If only…
The connection monitoring Dib was complete, and the volume started to pick up Dib’s voice.
“But Zim was my FIRST friend! I NEEDED him! There…”
Zim shut his eyes, and his antennae drooped as he listened to his friend’s strained voice spill from the speakers. Kinlin’s shoulders sagged as he watched Zim. He turned away and focused on the monitor. Zim felt more tears sting his eyes as Dib questioned Zim’s lack of farewell. Zim whispered, “If they would have given me time, Dib… I wanted to see you again.” As a new voice was picked up, Zim’s antennae twitched. He opened his eyes to watch the grainy image of Dib in a car, seated next to someone he had never seen before. He grimaced at the way the unfamiliar human was touching Dib. Zim watched in silence, captivated by the way Dib seemed to be pleased by the attention. He shifted uncomfortably as Dib’s forehead was ‘kissed.’ The words the nameless human spoke after the act felt like a knife through Zim’s chest.
“I promise, I’ll never leave you without saying goodbye.”
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