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Borealis: A Zutara Story	By : jaded_priceless Category: Avatar - The Last Airbender > AU/AR - Alternate Universe/Alternate Reality Views: 34026 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 4
Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender, Avatar: The Legend of Korra, any historical figures or events, or easily recognizable persons, places or things. I make no profit from this work of fanfiction

Chapter List
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Katara was woken by the sound of horns blaring and Zuko’s cursing, “Shit. Wake up hurry. We went to sleep up here! We have to hurry before Chu-hua does something to your brother! Get up!”
Katara scrambled to her feet and out of the door behind Zuko. She didn’t wait for him to undo the ropes and lower the platform. She created an ice slide and grabbed Zuko. His screams could be heard across the Ursa and all five escorts as they sped down it. She began running as soon as her feet hit the deck, “He’s alive. I haven’t hurt him. Don’t hurt Sokka!”
Zuko could barely keep up as her smaller body wove through the bulkheads on the way to the brig. When they got there Chu-Hua and Azula were standing outside her brother’s cell, “Zuko’s alive. I haven’t hurt him! Don’t hurt Sokka.”
“It’s true. I took her to the watchtower to see the whales and we fell asleep,” Zuko blurted.
“As nice as it is to know you continue to uphold our clan’s traditions your mother would not be pleased at the circumstances at which you’ve shared them,” Chu-Hua hissed.
“My mother would not be pleased at either of us,” Zuko replied tersely.
Azula laughed, “No, Zuzu, as usual you are wrong. I haven’t given a crown to a peasant or committed her least favorite action. I think if Mommy were here she’d smile at me from her ashpile.”
“You bitch!”
Azula danced away when Zuko lunged at her but Chu-hua snatched her collar, “Princess Azula, you would do well to remember the full identity of the woman you disrespect. I imagine such language would also upset your father.”
Azula paled. She had forgotten Chu-hua and her mother were close. She had not considered someone would tell her father and did not want to think of what he would to to her if he learned of them. She shrugged, “Yes, I suppose you’re right but it is just so much fun to make Zuzu upset. He’s almost as much fun as this Water Peasant.”
Katara stared at her brother. He was standing but knew it was only because he was being held by a guard. One of his eyes was black; his lips were split and swollen. His arms were bruised as if they had been pummeled while he had held them in defensive position.
Chu-hua noticed Katara’s gaze and nodded for the third person with them to let go of Sokka, “Come along Azula. There is nothing more this trash can tell us.”
Zuko’s arms locked tightly around Katara’s body kept her from running to him as he fell, “The worse off he looks the better off he will be. In a few hours everyone will have forgotten about him. We must leave him be until then.”
Katara was about to argue then she noticed Mu and one of the stable hands. The woman turned away and covered her mouth unable to look at Sokka’s condition. Mu’s hand was clenched on her shoulder. One by one their gaze found hers and Katara knew they would do something to help her brother.

The first thing Zuko noticed when they walked back into the room was the bed. It was perfectly made although they’d left it disheveled. He removed his boots after asking Katara if she wanted breakfast.
“I’m not hungry but you can get something. I’m going to take a shower. We still smell like the kitchens.”
Zuko shook his head and began to undress. Katara removed a nightgown from the dresser and took it into the restroom. Zuko threw up twice in the shower. Someone had taken their bedsheets; someone knew he had allowed a day to pass without taking her. His father was impatient and unreasonable. He’d fed Azula’s pet koi to a larger one the first time she forgot to change the water. He didn’t want to think of what he’d due to Katara, his pet, if he believed he’d lost interest in her. He could not let what happened to the leader of the Kyoshi warriors happen to her.
Zuko lay down and waited until she had settled next to him to breach the subject.
“Someone has been in here. They know that we haven’t….Father will claim I’ve lost interest and take you away from me. We left the bed unmade. Can I....? Our sheets have been taken. Will you…? I don’t want him to give you to the nobles,” Zuko was agitated. His words were jumbled and it took him a while to finally blurt out, “Will you have sex with me Katara?”
“Are you stupid?”
“No, I’m not. He’ll give you to the nobles. There’s this room at the palace…I can’t let them do that to you!” Zuko hissed frantically while moving closer to her.
He placed a cuff around her left wrist while pleading, “Don’t fight. I don’t want to hurt you!”
Katara managed to free her arm and swung at him.
“Don’t fight me Katara. I don’t want to hurt you.”
The unattached golden cuff split the flesh beneath his right eye as it made contact but she knew it wouldn’t be enough. It was never enough. Her legs had already been captured and he was crushing her with his heft. She bit wishing she’d never suggested showering. Fan had fried several hundred dumplings and the stench of spices and grease had soaked into their skin by the time they left. It would have been better than blood and soap to mask the sweaty taste of Firebender.
“I’m sorry, Katara I’m sorry. I don’t want to hurt you. Please just stop fighting.”

Zuko lowered his head, unable to look at her expression. The sun was up and she was lying on her back. He could see each one of her tears as they were forming. The creature between his legs had spewed against her thighs; this time he had remembered the danger of getting her pregnant.
There was a hollow empty feeling in his heart. It would have been better, so much better if she would have accepted the massage the day before; if he could have claimed her as his concubine without her ever having known it. If she didn’t fight, didn’t struggle; he wouldn’t have hurt her. She wouldn’t be lying beneath him crying because he’d hurt her. She wouldn’t be in pain because it was necessary to do something so vile to protect her.

Zuko was on top of her; before he had turned his head she had seen her reflection in his eyes. It was worse than looking in the mirror. At least in mirror she could pretend she didn’t know what it felt like to have him holding her down, pushing inside of her, spewing lies in her ear, panting against her neck. The feeling of shame in her heart, skin stuck between her teeth, beneath her nails, hair wound around her fingers, stickiness between her thighs and pain between them wouldn’t let her lie. She could no longer lie to herself, could no longer feign ignorance.
Her voice was brittle and if she didn’t feel her lips moving she would not have recognized the scratchy voice was hers, “I know why you’ve been taking me to the spa.”
Zuko’s body stiffened on top her.
“I know what you’ve been doing to me Zuko. I just didn’t say anything. I thought it would be easier for me if I didn’t acknowledge it. I could pretend it didn’t happen. I know what you’ve been doing to me Zuko,” Katara whispered as the tears rolled down her cheeks.
He closed his eyes and said nothing as continued, “I knew I knew but I didn’t say anything. Why I didn’t say anything when I knew what you were doing to me? Why didn’t I say anything? Why didn’t I say anything to stop you? Why did I pretend like I didn’t know what you’d done? Did you think the Water Tribe peasant was too dumb to notice she was wearing different underwear?”
“I don’t think you’re dumb, Katara,” Zuko replied as he moved off of her.
Katara winced in pain as the bed shifted; she had forgotten this pain; this feeling that everything beneath her waist and between her legs had been ripped apart. She couldn’t let the pain distract her. She needed to know why he had done something so cowardly and unforgivable, “Then why? Why did you do that to me and act like it never happened?”
“Why did you?” Zuko whispered next to her.
He raised his head and looked at her, “Why didn’t you say anything the first day when you noticed your underwear had been changed? You knew I had to have done something? Why didn’t you say anything the next day or the next? Is this way better? While you’re awake and can fight back? You’re bleeding Katara. A woman is only supposed to bleed the first time she has sex but you bleed every time. Is it better to know that you’ve fought even though you always end up hurting?”
“I don’t want to hurt you Katara, especially not there. I’ve never wanted to hurt you Katara but now its….” Zuko said letting his voice trail off as he helped her to sit up, “I would rather kill myself than see you in pain.”
“So why haven’t you? If you’d rather kill yourself than see me in pain why are you still breathing?” Katara pushed his hands away and leaned against the wall. There was blood on the bed where she had been laying and she could feel it dripping out of her. It hurt so badly to even sit. She didn’t want to think how much it would hurt to get up.
“Because I know there are others who would do much worse to you. The terrible things I've done would seem like nothing compared to them,” Zuko said quietly as he lifted her and carried her to the bathroom.
He placed a towel in the shower then sat her down on top of it. “I know you don’t believe me when I say I made you a concubine for your benefit. I don’t deny mistreating you. I am willing to make you my queen and spend the rest of my life taking responsibility for you and my actions. I did what I did while you were asleep because I don’t want to hurt you. I’m willing to bet that’s the same reason you didn’t say anything.”

The water went cold and reheated itself twice before Katara left the shower; or rather Zuko had done something to reheat it for her. If this ship was like the one they’d stolen the cistern was a part of the ships steam power system. The water should not have reheated that fast. He had said he used her while she was sleeping so he wouldn’t hurt her. He said she hadn’t said anything because she didn’t want to be hurt.
Zuko had said he had violated her while she was drugged because he didn't want to her her. She couldn't deny there was some truth in his speculation that she had remained silent for the same reason. In those four short days she had forgotten the agonizing misery of healing herself. She had been raped each of those four days but not once did she have to endure the excruciating pain of forcing her flesh to reknit. Six. It had been six days since she’d left the infirmary. The first he’d caged her beneath her weight and oiled her. The next four he’d done it while she dozed after leaving the infirmary.
Today she’d been awake. She didn’t allow him to roll her onto her stomach when he tried. Today like all the others she had fought. Today like all but five times she thought she was dying but there was no way in Koh’s darkest abyss she would allow herself to submit.
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Borealis: A Zutara Story