Off The Clock

BY : Citizenjess
Category: +G through L > Jackie Chan's Adventures
Dragon prints: 4418
Disclaimer: I do not own Jackie Chan s Adventures, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.


Valmont stood over his captive; the messy-haired archaeologist - or at least, his "dark half" since the yin-and-yang talisman had worked its magic and split him in two - slouched lazily in the chair, wearing his smallest Enforcer's sunglasses and jacket. "Bring me the talismans," the crime lord hissed, "and I will make you rich."

He appeared to consider this, lips curling up in a mischievious smirk. "Works for me," he shrugged.

-- from "The Tiger & the Pussycat"


"Leave us," Valmont ordered his men with a dismissive wave towards the door. "Mr. Chan and I have much to discuss." Finn and Chow obeyed, nodding at Jackie as they left to join Ratso in a game of cards.

"Nice guys," Jackie noted, taking in the room's sparce furnishings; in its off-time, it served as Valmont's private studimlyimly lit, a chair sat at the opposite end with the desk and a scrutinizingly bright lamp at the other; behind them stood a cabinet, non-descript but obviously very expensive. He nodded at Valmont, arms still crossed rebelliously over his chest. "You had terms to discuss or something?"

"Er, yes," the crime lord replied, slightly taken aback by Jackie's forcefulness. When he was "whole", the Chinese man was rather polite, even before he ceremoniously went about kicking his opponent's ass. His newfound dominance - normally hidden behind a sound judgment, according to Shendu* - was exciting. Plus, it occured to Valmont that he had never really talked to Chan; he never really "talked" to anyone, but perhaps they could have a moment's peace. Together. Or something.

"Well?" Chan said with a hint of impatience.

Valmont tore himself away from thoughts about his nemesis; he had never noticed just how chiseled Jackie's jaw was, how surprisingly strong his biceps appeared to be . . . "You will bring me the talismans," he replied. "All of them, and once they have been obtained, infinite wealth will be accessable to the Dark Hand. You will likewise be party to it, as well," he finished.

Chan still looked bored. "Sounds about right," he replied. There was an uncomfortable silence before he added, "are you gay?"

The crime lord nearly jumped out of his skin at the abrupt change of subject. "Excuse me?"

Jackie raised an eyebrow. "I've just always been curious. Besides," he added, "it's not like I've never noticed you staring at me."

Valmont felt his normally bronzed complexion turn crimson. "I-I . . ." he began, trying to come up with *some* way to steer them back to a safer topic. He normally would never have put up with anybody questioning him, let alone about something so personal, but Chan . . . Chan was different. Licking his lips, he finally forced out, "s-so what?"

"No reason," Jackie resed ced cheerfully, standing up and crossing his arms over his chest. "I'd better get those talismans, then." He began to cross the room, but turned and walked behind Valmont. "Unless there was anything else?" His prompting tone was light, playful, and only made the other man's heart pound more furiously. How could he seem so passe after getting such a rise out of his nemesis, Valmont wondered. Half of him wanted Jackie to saunter out the door with nary another word, but the other half wished Chan would press him for more details, if nothing else, to know that the original question was popped for more than just as a way to catch him off-guard.

Valmont seemed to regain some of his vigour. "You're awfully sure of yourself today, Mr. Chan." He turned around to face the Chinese man and realized with a start that they were standing only scant inches apart. His breath quickened; "perhaps we can rectify that."

Jackie pulled Chow's sunglasses off and placed them atop his head; mischievous brown eyes crinkled in the corners. "Is that a promise?" he grinned. And before the other man could stutter a response, Jackie tugged him closer by the lapels of his jacket and kissed him.

Valmont's head swirled; he had never been out-and-out kissed by another man before, least of all, the one he would have hand-picked for his partner, and the same person who was currently sliding his tongue languidly along Valmont's teeth, probing for entryway into his mouth. The crime lord conceded, then attacked the intruder excitedly with his own tongue. The two men waged a silent war for several moments, battling fiercely for control. When they finally parted for air, Valmont panted, "you really go for the gold, don't you, Mr. Chan?"

Jackie grinned and toyed with Valmont's tie, unknotting it and flicking open the top buttons on the other man's silk black shirt. "You've said that to me before," he replied, reaching around to finger Valmont's long ponytail. "You can't expect me not to when you're worth the chase." He leered and leaned in for another plundering kiss, again ing ing off Valmont's current train of thought.

"Don't you think," Valmont sputtered, trying to recompose his snobby British facade and retain some dignity, "that somebody might be wondering what's going on in here?" Despite the protest, he allowed Jackie to slip off his green jacket, but squirmed when Chan slipped a hand down the front of his pants. "I mean, don't you care that somebody might happen upon us?"

"Not particularly," Jackie answered. "They all seem pretty good at taking orders, and you told them to get lost." His mouth quirked in the corners; "scared?"

Valmont's eyes flashed; he may have let his guard slip beyond dangerously low levels in this particular situation, but nobody talked to him like that, not even Chan, and not even if it turned him on even more. Trying to make a good show of being angry, he pulled Chan to him forcefully, holding fast to the Chinese man's collar and planted a hard kiss on his mouth, biting down sligh Jac Jackie groaned, obviously approving, and Valmont felt compelled to begin undressing the other man; he pulled Chan's blue sweater up and over his head, revealing a white tank top which quickly joined its predecessor on the floor. "I am never afraid," Valmont retorted finally, voice husky and (hopefully, he thought) fierce with passion. He willed himself not to look nervously at the door; Chan made it much easier to concentrate on their current situation, however, when he unbuckled Valmont's trousers and slipped them down.

"You've always been good at pretending you're not scared," Chan responded. "It's a nice attempt, but I can see through it." He reached down to cup the front of Valmont's boxers for emphasis, grinning wickedly when the other man keened at his touch.

"Have you . . . been planning this?" Valmont asked breathily, hands resting on Jackie's bare chest. He wanted to tell Chan just how much of a prat he was for teasing him like this, but he was afraid to let his quivering voice indicate how much he was enjoying it.

"Maybe," Jackie said slyly, continuing his ministrations. Valmont, not to be outdone, rubbed his palms against the Chinese man's nipples, eliciting a groan. "Or maybe I just wanted to make you beg."

"I do not beg," Valmont responded, giving one of the nipples a sharp pinch. He could feel the hotness creeping back into his face.

"We'll see about that," Jackie said matter-of-factly. Without another word, he tugged down Valmont's underwear and positioned himself at face-level with the other man's crotch in one swift movement. Valmont let out a strangled gasp as Jackie Chan went down on him.

The crime lord sighed pleasurably as Jackie's mouth worked; hands nestled in tufts of messy dark hair, Valmont felt his head swim. It was only in his most desperate fantasies that he had fancied doing anything like this with Chan, and he always willed those away quickly. Chaste he most certainly was not, but the idea that anybody, be it through magical means or otherwise, should find out and use the information against him was a humiliating prospect. Right now, though, with waves of bliss washing over him and Chan artfully positioned at his feet, lightly caressing the other man's thighs so he shivered like a high-strung horse, Valmont's only thought was how perfectly *wonderful* this arrangement was.

He moaned indignantly when Chan suddenly stopped. "More," he gasped, trying to force Jackie's head back down, but the Chinese man stood and finished disrobing Valmont, removing his shirt deftly.

"That was only a warm up," he murmured, clutching Valmont's shoulders and wrenching him closer so he had better access to the other man's neck. "I told you I was going to make you beg," he continued, planting kisses along Valmont's throat.

"Are you now?" the other man responded, hoping he didn't sound too needy. Intrinsic need for comfort got the better of him and he added, "I suppose we're going to copulate standing up?"

"Well, now that you mention it," Jackie trailed off, eyes resting on a piece of furniture on the other side of the room. "That yours?"

"My chair," Valmont started, not wanting to sully his precious plush red armchair that had served him as a place of solitude on so many occasions. He'd always been slightly germophobic, even as a kid, and even with Chan giving him that come-hither stare . . . "Oh, alright," Valmont grumped, allowing Jackie to lead him across the room.

Jackie stared at the invitingly overstuffed cusions for a moment and then turned back to Valmont, who eagerly met his lips. The two men ki art artfully, eventually fag ing into the chair, Valmont splayed sideways across the arms with Jackie posed nimbly atop him. He motioned for Valmont to get on his knees, and the other man complied, cursing himself for being so doggedly obedient. "Wait," he managed to gasp before Chan did anything. "There's a jar of Vaseline in that cabinet over there." It had only ever been used to brighten his teeth on a couple of occasions, but Jackie didn't need to know that.

Chan retrieved the canister and dipped his fingers into the sticky concoction, stroking himself a few times for good measure. He positioned himself deftly behind Valmont and traced the other man's spine, making him quiver. "Ready?" he questioned softly.

"Y-yes," came the almost whispered reply. Jackie entered him in one fluid movement, grasping the other man's member with his already-Vaselined hand to contrast the pain wtih pleasure. Valmont grunted as his erection sprang to life once again, hands gripping the armrest like there was no tomorrow.

Chan sped up his pace, making both partners' breathing accelerate. Valmont wanted to say something, anything, but he couldn't articulate past keening and moaning with pleasure-filled gasps. Just as he neared orgasm, Jackie stopped; "beg me," he ordered, and Valmont shamelessly complied. It did not take long to finish either man off after that, and they both came with loud groans that left them breathless and shaky.

Valmont collapsed back against Jackie in the aftermath, who propped himself into a sitting position in the recliner. The two exchanged satisfied kisses, more slow and languid and sweetly sticky than before. When he could speak again, Jackie noted idly, "well, I suppose we discussed those terms in detail."

Valmont's lips curled. "That was most certainly some off-the-clock training," he responded.

"We had better get back to work, then," Jackie continued, not missing a beat.

"Yes, we should," Valmont agreed, not yet budging from where Chan's arms were wrapped comfortably around him, where their legs were tangled as they reclined like two secret lovers in a soiled chair. The yin-yang talisman, the satiated crime lord decided, was definitely his favourite of the set.


* I realize that Uncle actually explains this during the episode, but it's nike ike Valmont conferences with him, and the scene right before the one I reference at the beginning of the 'fic does show Shendu explaining to his cohort about the power of spiritual balance.

Also, I've decided that the hardest thing about writing slash isn't making sure not to feminize the male characters too much, or even knowing what goes where and when, but the pronoun utilization. When it's a guy and a girl, it's simple enough to say, "he kissed her" and use almost all pronouns for the rest of the sentence, but with two guys it gets really confusing. I've proofread this a couple of times (it was originally penned for twelve messy pages in my notebook), and it seems to be pretty sound to me, so I hope nothing's too confusing. Er, you know, and that people enjoyed the story; please feel free to leave a review, by the way!


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