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Multiversity	By : GeorgeGlass Category: +G through L > Gravity Falls Views: 31376 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: The authors of this story do not own Gravity Falls, its characters, or its giant lumberjack statue. We made no money from writing this story.

Chapter List
- 6
- 7
- 8
Chapter 7: Flipping Channels
“More extreme?” Dipper replied, looking at Aphrodite with disbelief. “So far, I’ve been to universes where I’m dating a teenager, my own sister, and a mermaid. You haven’t put me in a single normal relationship. Like, with a human girl my own age who’s not related to me.”
Aphrodite gave him that unsettling, crooked smile.
“Well, if that’s what you want…” she said.
“Wait, where are you going to se- aaaaaah!” Dipper screamed as he once again fell through interdimensional space.
The falling stopped, and then his entire front went cold. He realized that he was up against a concrete wall—and naked. When he tried to move, his arm went only a couple of inches before something around his wrist stopped him with a clinking sound.
He was chained up. In someone’s basement, judging from the dim light and the musty smell.
“Oh, Diiiipperrr,” a singsong voice said from behind him.
He managed to turn his head just enough to see Candy standing behind him. She was wearing something like a black leather party dress, along with black stockings and shoes with what had to be the highest, spikiest heels that the laws of physics and the limits of human musculoskeletal anatomy would allow.
But what caught and held Dipper’s gaze was the foot-long black rubber dildo that Candy was strapping to her hips.
“C- Candy?” Dipper stammered. “What- What are you doing?”
She smiled lustily at him. “My mom and dad are going to be gone all weekend, so we have lots of time to play with our new toy. It’s going to be fuuuuuuuun…”
As Candy reached for a big jar of petroleum jelly, Dipper squeezed his eyes shut and shouted, “I’m done with this universe! I’m done with this universe!”
To Dipper’s immense relief, he was pulled up out of his alter’s body and dropped back into his own. He leaned against a tree, panting.
“There’s no normal relationships, kid,” Aphrodite said. “Girls are people. And like the song says, people are strange.”
“Holy crap,” Dipper breathed. Then he looked at Aphrodite with skepticism. “So who’s next? Grenda?”
“Mmm, no,” she said, frowning. “If you didn’t like the Candy situation, Grenda’s not gonna do it for you, either.”
“Seriously? Don’t tell me she’s also secretly a domin- domino-”
“Dominatrix,” Aphrodite corrected. “And no, she’s not.”
“Then why wouldn’t I want to date her?”
“She has a penis.”
Dipper’s eyes widened. “Wow. That…explains some stuff.”
“I’m sure. Now, off you go.”
Suddenly he was hurtling through nothingness once again. Despite the abruptness of his launch, he managed not to scream. He was starting to get used to this mode of travel.
He quickly recognized the environment as the inside of Grunkle Stan’s battered RV. But the circumstances weren’t familiar at all: He was on the built-in sofa—with a girl sitting on his lap. Dipper recognized her as Mitzi, the cute black girl he’d met at Log Land during the tour of Oregon’s roadside attractions that he’d taken with Grunkle Stan, Mabel, Soos, Candy, and Grenda.
“Mmm,” Mitzi said saucily. “This is my favorite place to sit.” She wiggled her bottom sexily, giving Dipper the beginnings of a hard-on.
“Mine, too,” said another girl’s voice, this one with a southern accent. Dipper looked to his left and saw Emma Sue, the girl with the light-brown pigtails whom he had met at Upside-Down Town. She smiled at him and winked flirtatiously.
“And mine,” said a third girl.
Dipper turned his head to the right, and there was Reba, a girl with long, braided brown hair. He had met her at the Corn Maze.
In his own universe, these girls had been angry with Dipper when they found out that he had flirted with all three of them (and Candy; Dipper was now glad to have dodged that bullet). But in this universe, it seemed, they had decided to share Dipper instead.
Wow, he thought, seeing the lustful smile on Reba’s face as she looked at him, while Mitzi continued to make subtle, erotic movements on his lap. I think I could get used to this.
“I’m real glad it’s my turn next,” said Emma Sue.
“Um, no,” Reba corrected sharply. “I’m next, then you.”
“Pretty sure you’re wrong about that, Peaches,” Emma Sue retorted.
“Not so fast,” Mitzi broke in. “I’ve still got five minutes before either of you gets to ride the Big Dipper.”
Glaring at Emma Sue, Reba said, “Don’t call me Peaches, Pigtails! Although I could leave out ‘tails’ and still be right.”
“Oh, that’s it, you stuck-up little prom queen!” Emma Sue shouted.
She lunged at Reba, knocking Mitzi halfway off Dipper’s lap. Reba threw a surprisingly expert hook punch at Emma Sue—who caught Reba’s arm and threw the girl over her shoulder.
Mitzi, infuriated at Emma Sue’s interference with her “lap time,” leaped off Dipper and threw a high roundhouse kick at the southern girl’s head. Emma Sue ducked the kick, then lashed out with her own foot and swept Mitzi’s standing leg, making the girl do an involuntary one-quarter backflip and land on her back on the floor.
Reba, also on the floor, now flipped to her feet like an Olympic gymnast and charged, slamming into Emma Sue from behind and sending the girl crashing into the closed side door of the RV.
“Girls, cut it out!” Dipper cried, leaping to his feet.
Mitzi rolled up to a standing position and grabbed a wooden log painted with the Log Land logo. She brandished the impromptu weapon at Reba.
“Get ready for my log-fu, bitch!” Mitzi shouted.
“Log this!” Reba cried, leaping forward to launch a jumping side kick at Mitzi’s midsection. Mitzi dodged aside, and Dipper took the kick in his gut. He collapsed to the floor even as Emma Sue grabbed Reba from behind in a choke hold.
“Aphrodite!” Dipper squeaked. “Get me out of here!”
He flew up out of his alter’s body and landed in his own. He felt relieved to be back in his own, uninjured frame.
“Wow,” Dipper said in a rapid exhale. “I guess everything has a down side.”
“Pretty much,” Aphrodite replied neutrally. “Now, let’s see…”
Dipper was off again, flying through the void and landing in another body. He found himself sitting at a table for two at Bean There, Done That, an outdoor coffee shop in downtown Gravity Falls. On Dipper’s side of the table was an open bottle of cream soda, while on the opposite side, strangely, there was a hickory log.
He looked up from the surface of the table and discovered an even stranger sight: Across from him was not a chair, but a wooden perch, on which a woodpecker sat. It tilted its head quizzically as it looked at him.
A mustachioed man with another woodpecker on his shoulder walked by. As he passed, he gave Dipper a friendly slap on the back and jovially asked, “Think she’s the marrying kind, boy?”
Dipper looked upward. “Are you kidding me with this?”
He was pulled up into the sky and landed back in his own body again.
“Sorry, kid—that was a glitch,” Aphrodite said. “Let’s try again.”
Dipper was off again, and after several seconds of freefall, he landed in another alter-Dipper’s body. He was standing in the back yard of a house he didn’t recognize. In fact, judging from the shining sun, and the cactus garden by the side of the house, it was clear that he wasn’t even in Oregon, let alone Gravity Falls. If anything, it looked like he was back in California, albeit not in Piedmont.
The back door of the house burst open, and there stood a girl like none Dipper had ever seen. Her golden hair fell down well past her waist and was kept out of the girl’s face by a red clip decorated with what looked like little devil horns. Her eyes were sparkling blue, and on each of her cheeks was a red blush-mark shaped like a heart.
“Dipper!” she cried, a huge smile on her face.
I’m dating her? he thought. She’s gorgeous!
Then he noticed the wand in her hand, decorated with a star. And she’s magical, too?
She ran forward and threw her arms around him, shouting “Hugs!” Dipper was more than happy to return her embrace.
Just as the girl released him, a black-haired boy in a red hoodie emerged from the house behind her.
“Dipper, my man!” the boy shouted in greeting. “You’re just in time!”
The girl pointed at something behind Dipper and said, “Me and Marco can handle most of ‘em. You just need to take out Big Chicken.”
Dipper turned around, and there in the yard stood a gang of bizarre monsters, all looking ready for a fight. Near the front of the group, there was a white, chicken-like creature that had to be seven feet tall.
“Buck-AW!” the chicken crowed angrily. Then it charged at Dipper, looking even bigger and angrier as it came.
“Okay, I’m done here!” Dipper screamed in panic, and then he was flying into the air and landing in his own body again.
“What lesson was I supposed to learn from that?” Dipper demanded of Aphrodite.
“Never let ‘em make crossovers a condition of your contract,” Aphrodite muttered.
“What are you talking about?”
“Don’t worry about it. At least it gave me a minute to figure out where to send you next.”
Dipper held up a hand. “Wait! I’ve been meaning to ask you: How- Oh come on!” he shouted as he suddenly found himself flying free of his body again, and then landing in a new one.
The first thing Dipper was aware of was the sound of rushing water. But when he opened his eyes, the environment around him seemed incongruous with the sound.
The room wasn’t one he recognized. The walls were gray concrete, decorated here and there with rumpled photos that had clearly been cut from magazines, mostly showing landscapes of forests, meadows, and rivers, including one of the waterfall from which Gravity Falls took its name. There were no windows; all of the light in the room came from a single caged bulb on the wall by the door. But the most prominent feature of the room was a sixty-five-inch TV screen that covered most of the wall to which it was bolted. The cot-like bed on which Dipper lay faced the screen, which was black.
“What…Where am I?” he murmured.
Dipper only half-suppressed a yelp as the big TV screen suddenly lit up, and the boy found himself looking at a computer-generated image of a girl’s face.
“Good morning!” the pixelated girl said brightly.
She had violet eyes, a button nose, and red blush-marks on her cheeks. Her long hair was blue and tied into two pigtails with what looked like colorful USB cables.
“I hope you slept well!” the girl said. “If you require assistance waking up, I know just what will help: a round of the Remove-My-Bra game.”
The digital girl pulled off the top of her sailor-suit outfit, then turned around, showing Dipper the buckled strap of her pink bra. Sexily, she looked at him over her shoulder.
“Ready, Player One?” she said, her tone playfully seductive.
“Oh, boy,” Dipper murmured.
- 6
- 7
- 8
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Multiversity