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My Own Public Idaho	By : Jake Category: +G through L > Hey, Arnold! Views: 234 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Hey Arnold! and I make no money from writing about it.

Chapter List
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1. Friday
At the County Recorder's Office in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, the Deputy Clerk looked up from the sheaf of legal documents on her desk at the expectant faces of the two blond kids who were standing on the other side, each with an appropriate adult next to them.
'So,' said the Clerk, 'you say you're both sixteen years old and residents of Washington State?'
'Yes,' said Arnold.
'Okay, that all checks out,' said the Clerk, glancing back at the papers for a moment. 'And sir, you're this young man's legal guardian and his grandfather?'
'Eh? What's that?' said Grandpa. 'Oh, yes; I most certainly am both of those things.'
'You must've seen that before,' said Helga.
'Unless you're very new to the job,' Miriam added.
'I have indeed seen it before,' said the Clerk, smiling slightly. 'Well, Arnold and Helga, do you plan on getting married today?'
'Yes!' Helga said eagerly.
'That's okay, isn't it?' Arnold asked, slightly anxiously. 'When I looked all of this up –'
'Certainly it's okay, if you can find a venue,' said the Clerk. 'Do you have a booking at City Hall?'
'We sure do,' said Miriam. 'We made it online, you know.'
'We didn't just wander in here off the street,' Grandpa added.
'That's become more than obvious by now,' the Clerk nodded. 'Okay, let's get those affidavits of consent filled out and signed, then I'll issue the marriage licence right away.'
'Thanks,' Arnold beamed.
'Wonderful,' Helga sighed.
When Arnold emerged from the street entrance of the County Recorder's Office, he spotted Helga sitting on a low wall nearby, staring reverently at their marriage licence. He went to sit next to her.
'Are you okay, Helga?' he asked.
'What do you think, Arnold?' she replied, fixing him with an enormous smile.
'I think you probably are okay,' said Arnold, smiling back at her, 'but I know you've thought about this day for a long time and I just wanted to ask... I mean, I thought I should make sure...'
'Make sure of what?' Helga asked quietly.
'Is this whole thing – the trip to Idaho, the wedding at City Hall, only having your mom and my grandpa here – enough for you?'
'You think I'm secretly pining for some enormous ceremony where everyone in the world turns out to congratulate us?'
'Not really,' said Arnold. 'But even so, I couldn't help wondering.'
'I've dreamed about that kind of wedding, sure,' said Helga. 'I guess because it's how they're usually presented on TV and stuff. But all I want is you, Arnold. You're enough.'
'That's exactly what I needed to know.'
'We'll have our party tomorrow, and it'll be a lot of fun. But today, I just want to marry you.'
'That certainly fits in with my plans,' said Arnold, treating her to a half-lidded look.
'Oh yeah?' Helga grinned. 'So I'm enough for you, huh?'
'Yes, you are,' said Arnold, taking her right hand in his left. 'You're definitely enough, Helga. Some might say you're too much, actually. But not me.'
'Good,' said Helga. 'I was worried for a second back there that you might be getting cold feet.'
'I didn't wake up at four and then sit behind the wheel for almost five hours, just to get cold feet.'
'Wonderful. Let's go get married, then.'
'Yes, let's,' said Arnold. 'After we've gotten some lunch.'
'After lunch, of course,' Helga agreed.
Miriam and Grandpa sat and watched with smiles on their faces and tears in their eyes as Arnold and Helga stood in front of a judge at Coeur d'Alene City Hall and completed a simple but heartfelt wedding ceremony.
'Do you want to say anything to each other before we move on to the vows?' the judge asked.
The bride and groom turned face to face, joined hands and exchanged slightly awkward smiles.
'Helga, you've taught me what true love really is,' said Arnold. 'That is, you've shown me what it actually means. I love you, and I want to marry you... so all in all, I'm glad we're here right now.'
'Oh, Arnold,' Helga laughed. 'Listen, you know what this means to me. You are my life – you are my soul! It was always going to be you or no one. I'm glad it's you.'
'That was truly touching,' the judge smiled benevolently. 'Are you both ready to declare your intent now?'
Arnold and Helga nodded eagerly.
'Then we'll proceed,' said the judge. 'Do you, Arnold Phillip Shortman, take Helga Geraldine Pataki to be your lawfully wedded wife?'
'I do,' said Arnold.
'Do you promise to love, honour and cherish her, in sickness and in health, for as long as you both shall live?'
'Yes, I do.'
'And do you, Helga Geraldine Pataki,' the judge continued, 'take Arnold Phillip Shortman to be your lawfully wedded husband?'
'Oh yes, yes, yes!' Helga squealed. 'I mean, I do.'
'Do you promise to love, honour and cherish him, in sickness and in health, for as long as you both shall live?'
'You bet I do!'
'Helga and Arnold have exchanged promises and affirmations,' the judge said in a conclusive tone of voice, 'pledging their continuing love and faithfulness to each other. Therefore, with the authority vested in me by the State of Idaho, I now declare that they are husband and wife. So, let's see that kiss.'
Arnold and Helga grinned at each other, then she leant downward slightly, he craned his neck upward a little, and their lips met. Grandpa and Miriam stood up and applauded; the judge joined in.
Arnold climbed into the driving seat of the Packard and smiled at Helga, who was already sitting next to him.
'You feeling all right, Helga?' he asked her.
'I've never felt happier in my life, Arnold,' she assured him. 'How about you?'
'Yeah, me either,' Arnold grinned. 'I can't believe we're actually married now.'
'I know,' Helga giggled. 'What the heck did we just do?'
They laughed together for a few moments, then they kissed each other.
'Let's make a move, huh, Short Man?' Grandpa said from the back seat. 'Maybe we can get home in time for a not-too-late dinner.'
'Okay, Grandpa,' said Arnold, reluctantly pulling out of the kiss and then turning the ignition key. 'Let's roll.'
'Are you sure you don't mind taking the time to drop me off?' Miriam asked.
'Of course not, Miriam,' said Arnold, shooting his mother-in-law a winning smile in the rear-view mirror. 'After what you did for us today, it's the absolute least you deserve.'
'It was my pleasure, Arnold,' said Miriam. 'I can't remember the last time I enjoyed a day so much.'
'How about when you last saw that Carlos guy, Mom?' Helga suggested.
'Hmm, yeah,' Miriam smiled. 'Maybe that day.'
The Packard pulled out of the parking lot and headed for the interstate.
As he turned onto Vine Street, Arnold stifled a yawn.
'Tell you what, Short Man,' said Grandpa. 'Just to prove I'm not too old to be totally useless, how about you pull up outside the house and leave the Packard to me? While you two go get freshened up, I'll put her in the garage and then see if there's anything edible in the kitchen.'
'Great plan, Grandpa,' said Arnold. 'But you were very useful today, you know.'
'I was glad to be,' said Grandpa.
Arnold brought the Packard to a halt outside the Sunset Arms, then he and Helga got out and headed for the front steps. While Arnold ferreted out his house key, Grandpa climbed out of the back and then into the front of the car. As he drove it around to the rear of the building, Arnold pushed the front door open.
'Well, Arnold?' Helga said expectantly.
'What?' Arnold laughed.
'Aren't you going to carry me over the threshold?'
'Do you want me to? I thought maybe you'd think that kind of thing was outdated and silly.'
'It is. But I'd still like you to do it.'
'Okay.'
To the accompaniment of a good deal of laughter, Arnold took hold of Helga by her shoulders and the backs of her knees and then hoisted her into his arms. As he had been instructed, he carried her over the threshold, then he put her down in the hallway.
'Excellent,' Helga remarked. 'Now I'm going to carry you upstairs!'
Arnold squealed in mock-alarm as she grabbed him around the middle and slung him onto her left shoulder, then she ran up the stairs as quickly as she could. He had been expecting the ride to end on the landing, but Helga dashed all the way to the far wall and pulled the cord of his drop-down staircase, then she carried him up that as well.
The door of Arnold's room burst open and the giggling mass of formal but attractive clothing and billowing blond hair thundered over the threshold. Helga hurled Arnold onto the bed, causing him to breathe out heavily, then she leapt on top of him.
'Oh God,' Arnold laughed, 'I don't think I'm gonna survive this marriage.'
'Are things getting a little too rough for you, Arnold?' Helga purred. 'Well, you did ask for it. You just signed up for a lifetime of Helga G. Pataki, bucko, and there's nothing you can do about that!'
'Don't you mean Helga G. Shortman?' Arnold grinned.
'Ah, so now you show your true colours!' Helga declared triumphantly. 'You want to possess me, don't you? Maybe I need to remind you just who wears the pants around here.'
'You only ever wear shorts,' Arnold giggled. 'But you're right – I do want to possess you, always!'
'Oh yeah?' Helga said, raising her eyebrow. 'Then why don't you get busy and consummate our marriage, right now!'
'There isn't time for that,' said Arnold. 'Grandpa's preparing some dinner for us, don't forget.'
'Oh, it'll take him hours to back that old boneshaker into the garage first.'
'I don't think it will, Helga.'
'In that case,' Helga smiled, 'maybe we should aim for something a little quicker.'
So saying, she scooted down the bed a short way on her hands and knees, then she started to unzip Arnold's fly.
'What exactly do you have in mind?' he asked, his breath catching slightly in his throat.
'I'm going to blow you,' Helga informed him, 'as a reward for all your long-distance driving.'
'Are you sure you want to do that right now?' Arnold asked. 'I probably have a ton of road mustard.'
'Mmm,' Helga grinned, 'that's my very favourite condiment. Well, yours is!'
With tender fingers but great enthusiasm, Helga extracted Arnold's cock and balls before stroking his semi into a full-on erection. She then proceeded to lick and kiss every inch of his genitals, causing him to gasp at regular intervals and dribble pre-cum from his urethra.
When she had quite finished this activity, Helga took Arnold's granite shaft into her mouth. She caressed it with her tongue as she moved her lips up and down its entire length, then he moaned in rapture as she started to suck on it. After several minutes of dedicated fellation, Arnold's mouth was hanging open and he was gripping the bedclothes tightly with both hands.
'Oh, jeez,' he panted. 'Helga, I'm really close here!'
She redoubled her efforts in response to this announcement, and did not flinch even for a moment when Grandpa's voice wafted in through the open bedroom door, sounding uncomfortably close.
'Arnold, I'm making soup!' it called. 'It'll be ready in a couple of minutes!'
'I'm coming, Grandpa!' Arnold yelled in response.
'What was that, Short Man?'
'I'm coming!'
This statement was immediately proven true as Helga felt the warmth of Arnold's boy juice filling her mouth. She quickly got to work swallowing it all.
'All righty, then,' Grandpa's voice barged in on the scene, mercifully further away now, 'I'll see you in a moment.'
Helga gulped down spurt after spurt of Arnold's sperm until the lengthy ejaculation ceased, then the two dragged themselves to their feet, giggling uncontrollably once again.
'We'd better get down there as quick as we can,' Arnold panted, as he tucked his cock and balls back into his formal but attractive trousers and zipped up the fly.
'I already had my soup,' Helga grinned, licking her lips.
'Helga, stop it,' Arnold laughed. 'Let's see if we can control ourselves enough to have a nice, civilised meal with my grandpa now, okay?'
'Okay,' said Helga.
Arnold entered his bedroom dripping with water and with a towel wrapped around his waist. Helga was waiting for him on the bed, completely naked. She grinned at him, he grinned back, then he dropped his towel and rushed over to embrace her. The two lay there kissing and caressing each other's bare bodies, their breathing quickening with each passing moment.
After a while, they rose to their knees. Arnold's left hand cupped Helga's right breast as he took the nipple into his mouth and licked it sensually, causing her to gasp in delight. As they adjusted their positions slightly, his glans brushed against her pubic hair and left a long trail of glistening pre-cum. Their hands then roamed all over each other's backs as their lips met in a deep, passionate kiss.
'I need to put my dick inside you now, Helga,' Arnold whispered a short time later.
'That certainly fits in with my plans, Arnold,' Helga assured him. 'Your reward isn't over yet, you know. The first thing you're going to do is drill me from behind like I'm a... a farm animal or something!'
'Always with the farm animals,' Arnold laughed. 'Are you sure you wouldn't like to do something else first? I owe you one from earlier, after all.'
'All you owe me right now is a damn good pounding,' Helga persisted. 'So, get to work!'
'Well,' said Arnold, 'if you insist.'
Helga turned her back to him and positioned herself on all fours. Arnold then bent his head and planted a series of kisses all over her buttocks.
'This is new,' Helga giggled.
'And fun,' said Arnold.
'Very,' Helga agreed.
After what seemed an appropriate amount of time, Arnold rose back to his knees and took out a foil-wrapped condom from one of the small drawers beside his bed. He removed the contraceptive device from its wrapper and started to roll it onto his rock-hard cock.
'No kids yet, huh?' Helga asked mischievously, peering at him over her right shoulder.
'I thought, probably not,' said Arnold, with mock severity. 'You agree?'
'I guess so,' Helga laughed. 'I definitely want to have your babies someday, Arnold. But not today.'
She turned her head back into a more comfortable position and smiled as he braced himself behind her. Slowly but eagerly, Arnold slid his sheathed dick into Helga's dripping pussy and began a series of pelvic thrusts. These built up steadily to an impressive speed; Arnold's hungry cock soon felt the full benefit of Helga's tight, gripping snatch.
Helga experienced a thrill of excitement at the thought of Arnold continuing to pound away at her trembling girlhood until he achieved orgasm; he proceeded to do exactly that. In time, Arnold threw back his head and yelled in ecstasy as he ejaculated unrestrainedly into the condom, then he withdrew his dick from Helga's vagina, pulled himself to his feet, picked up the empty wrapper and walked across the room to the trashcan, panting heavily all the while.
Helga stood up and watched as Arnold threw away the ripped foil before he reached down to pull the condom off his penis. A smile spread across Helga's face as she drank in the sight of the used sheath bulging with Arnold's jizz, knowing that she was the one responsible for putting it in there.
Arnold tied a knot in the open end of the contraceptive and dropped it into the trash, then Helga marched up to him and kissed him passionately. It was not long before her right hand was wrapped around his cock, encouraging the recently unsheathed organ back into a state of full wakefulness.
'Oh, God,' Arnold breathed. 'What are you trying to do to me, Helga?'
'Reward you a little more, Arnold,' Helga purred, still stroking his shaft. 'I'm determined to make you come one more time before I even think about coming myself.'
'I... I'm really not sure I can,' Arnold gasped. 'Not again – not so soon!'
'I guess we'll see, won't we? Just relax and let me do the work, huh?'
'Okay.'
Helga was soon pumping Arnold's cock as though her life depended on it, and Arnold was panting and sweating profusely. His vocalisations and facial expressions showed high levels of sexual pleasure mixed with extreme physical strain.
With a huge gasp and a full-body shudder, Arnold ejaculated once again. His testicles flushed red as they discharged their load; two decent spurts of semen shot across the room, then an impressive final surge dribbled onto the carpet in one long stream.
'Good boy!' Helga enthused. 'Criminy, that was hot.'
'Okay,' Arnold panted, 'now it's definitely your turn! Sit on the couch and spread your legs so I can eat you out.'
'If you insist, Arnold,' said Helga.
On his knees in front of his pop-out couch, Arnold's face was buried between Helga's thighs as he ate her pussy with gusto. She moaned approvingly while he licked up and down her slit, then she gasped in joy as he went in for a concluding round of clitoral stimulation.
Arnold worked with dedication and enthusiasm until Helga's pussy juice flooded into his mouth, then there was a surprise for them both as another surge discharged from her Skene glands and spattered across his face in several explosive squirts. As usual, Helga screamed in ecstasy all the time she was climaxing.
Arnold rose to his feet and waited patiently until his partner had regathered herself. When her breathing was finally back under control, Helga fixed him with a look of utter devotion.
'That was amazing, Arnold,' she sighed.
'Let's go to bed now,' he suggested.
'To sleep, you mean?' said Helga.
'Not yet,' Arnold grinned.
'Excellent,' Helga smiled. 'But before we do, let me take a look at that beautiful back of yours.'
Arnold turned through one hundred and eighty degrees; Helga took a minute or so to admire his ridges, dips and contours with keen interest. The two then got into bed together, kissing and caressing each other once more. It was not long before another condom was being rolled onto Arnold's penis.
'God, I want you inside me again,' Helga breathed.
'I will be in a minute,' Arnold assured her.
'I have to say, Arnold,' Helga grinned, 'I'm really enjoying our marriage so far.'
'So am I, Helga,' said Arnold, as he began to adjust his position on the mattress. 'Clearly it's gonna be at its most enjoyable when neither of us is wearing the pants... or anything else, for that matter.'
Helga laughed appreciatively at this as Arnold stroked her right thigh with his left hand, then he hoicked the whole leg out of the way and thrust his sheathed cock into her pussy. Their lips then locked and they kissed each other deeply, as Helga hooked Arnold's hips with the backs of her knees and drew him even further inside her. They made love passionately and unrestrainedly; Arnold's pelvis was soon hard at work.
'Oh, God,' Helga gasped, 'oh, yes! Fuck me, Arnold!'
'Whatever you say, Helga,' Arnold panted.
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My Own Public Idaho