BY : RandomJaz
Category: +S through Z > South Park
Dragon prints: 7362
Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of it's characters, nor do I profit from this fanfiction.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Ayyyy! *finger guns* I knew you'd be back 😎 LOL. Hope you guys enjoyed the double update, today. Chapters 14 and 15 are yours for the taking.

Little side note: The song briefly referenced in this chapter is "Dancing's not a crime" by Panic! At the Disco. Remember how I was dancing last chapter's note? Well, now you know to what 💃

Bigger side note: With the main vamp kids, Mike's group, I know all their real names EXCEPT for Vlad's. So, until the creators of South Park decide to give him a name, I'm taking some creative liberties.

Also, I'm presuming that Bloodrayne's real name is "Katie" because in the first episode that they all appeared in, Butters mentions that a girl named Katie started hanging out with the first vampire at school (Mike), and became a vampire, too. (Annie's specifically singled out by name in the gymnasium as the girl with sparkles on her cheeks, so I know she can't be Katie.)

Of course, Mike, Larry, and Ryan were also specifically named in the show, too.

...So, I think that's all for this author's note! Hope you guys enjoy! Can't wait to hear from you guys! If not, thank you for reading 😊


"Good news, kids! All your pottery survived the kiln. You can come get your projects, after school."

Pottery class wasn't an elective I chose. I got stuck with it. Playing with over glorified mud wasn't whimsical or rewarding how our artsy, hippy teacher endorsed it to be.

Our latest project was to make something using the pottery wheel. There were bowls and vases, mostly. People make it look easy on t.v, but that shit is hard.

The process was frustrating. I didn't have any use for a flower vase. All that time and aggravation making it and painting it, to have no purpose for it.

"Pete!" Ms. Gavin stopped me after school as I walked by her classroom with Mike.

I jumped a little at her overly excited, friendly exclamation.

This lady shat rainbows, and looked like a bird that could dress itself. Her wavy blonde hair was tied back with colorful bandana, not a match to her brown dress. She had feather earrings and big, geeky glasses.

This lady was always a little too happy. Yeah, the callous on her fingertips? Not years of clay work. Those were burns. She totally smoked the happy salad on her own time. Lady needed a roach clip.

"You almost forgot to get your project." She waved for me to come over to her classroom.

"You took pottery?" Mike trailed behind me.

The pottery room smelled like wet soil, and faintly of the glaze we used to paint our projects. It was weird. A natural, organic aroma mixed with that chemical odor. They didn't compliment each other.

My vase was painted an opaque shade of black. All one color, nothing else. Art wasn't my forte. Working the clay went well enough. Painting designs?

May as well put the paintbrush between my butt cheeks and tell me to have at it. Wouldn't come out any different than if you put the brush in my hand. I can't fucking paint, Man.

"You did great, Pete. I run a pottery workshop at the community college, you should come."

"I don't care for pottery all that much...I didn't choose this class, remember?"

"Oh, you break my heart."

The projects lined shelves with sheets of paper labeling each one with class numbers and student names. Everyone else had these colorful pieces, mine sat out of place.

"Pete Thelman." She read aloud, as if she needed any help distinguishing mine from the rest. "Here it is."

Taking my vase down, she handed it over. She laid it in my arms carefully, like a baby. Wonder what would happen if I smashed it in front of her. Because that's what I was going to do with it, anyways.

"She's right, baby bat. Your vase came out nicely." On our way out, Mike appraised it.

"I don't know how. I didn't want to be there." I complained, holding a grudge to this inanimate object.

Mike chalked up my disinterest to having recently survived the flu. I wasn't back to myself, but I wasn't feverish or contagious anymore. No more medicine or daily temperature taking, for me.

We were just waiting for me to bounce back. Today was the first day I felt relatively close to "normal", minus the fact I was still struggling with minor fatigue.

"You'll appreciate your vase when you feel better."

"I'll feel better when I smash it."

"You aren't serious, are you?"

"Yes, I'm serious. What am I supposed to do with this stupid vase?"

Stopping in front of me, Mike held his arms out. He was appalled.

"Give it to me." he said, watching me for any sudden movements. "You're not smashing that vase."

"What's it to you if I smash it? It's just a stupid vase."

"I want it."

"I made it."

"That's why I want it."

How my teacher placed it in my arms like a baby, Mike took it from me and protectively held it to his chest, like a baby.

"It's beautiful. Don't break it!"

"Keep it if it'll make you happy. Drama Queen."

The fake, decorative red roses that Mike had lying on his dresser's vanity went in to the vase. He was such a romantic.

"I'm never going to understand your attachment to that dumb vase I made." I said, placing things up on to Mike's bed as I pulled them out searching my bag for my cellphone charger. "Should've just let me smash it."

That charger I searched for tried to dig its way to China. I had to go to the very bottom of my bag for it. Placing everything back in, I accidently knocked down my notebook as I blindly reached for things.

My elbow hit it, and it fell to the floor. Something slid out from the pages, gliding across the floor to Mike's boots.

"Look what we have here." He chimed, bending over to pick it up with interest.

It was the bat he drew for me. Inspecting it, Mike fluttered the index card-sized stock paper.

"Now that I'm looking at this, I don't think I like it."

Puzzled at his criticism, I reached up from my kneeled position down on the floor.

He pulled it away.

"Ah-Ah." Mike, still inspected it. "...Hm. Yeah, no. I don't like it."

"...there's nothing wrong with it."

"You should let me shred it."

Between his fingertips and thumbs, Mike pinched the paper and made as if it was going to rip it.


"Why?" He challenged me without missing a beat. "It's only a silly drawing."

"But, I want it."

"But, I made it."

...This asshole. He was never going to rip it.

"Okay, okay. I get it."

Bending at the waist, Mike returned the art I secretly treasured. It wasn't a secret anymore, clearly.

"Leave my vase alone." He pecked my nose.

That vase came back to bite me in the ass. Realistically, it was my own ignorance that came back to bite me. I wasn't ready to have that conversation with myself, yet.

Because the flu kicked my ass so thoroughly, Mike didn't make any plans with his friends that involved social outings the duration of it. Today marked Day 8. That was a lot for them to go without.

Mike canceled their club meeting last week, and today's was also canceled. Everyone understood. Next week, their schedule would go back to the way it was.

Headset on, and game controller in hand, Mike laid in bed, propped up with pillows. Vlad, Larry and Annie were online with him. Ryan and Bloodrayne were on a date.

I wasn't playing with them, by choice. I couldn't lie on top of Mike, and play, at the same time.

His arms were wrapped around me, controller on my back while he played Mario-Kart with his friends. Mike had the headset on so he could talk with them, but the audio was coming through on the t.v. He felt it was rude to keep me out of the loop.

Mike was King Boo and Vlad was Bowser. Larry and Annie picked the black Shy Guy, and Rosalina. Per word of Mike, Ryan and Bloodrayne would have been Metal Mario and Metal Peach if they'd been present to play.

I was always a Dry Bones type of man, myself.

"Whoever threw that blue shell, your mom's a ho."

"My mother is a saint, thank you very much, Vlad." Mike rebutted, driving past him unapologetically. "You're a ho."

"I resent that."

"You resemble that."

Larry derailed off the track due to a banana peel. For the fifth time. They were only halfway through Lap 2.

Annie, who was taking up Third place, was cracking up because she'd been the one dropping the banana peels he kept running in to.

"Pete was right. Maybe you are retarded." She cackled as he slipped on another one.

"Annie, I thought we were friends!"

"We are friends! You just royally suck at this game."

Determined to prove himself competent, Larry paid closer attention. He evaded a banana peel that Annie threw backwards.

"Ha!" He boasted. "Missed me."

A stray green shell bouncing around the track came and plowed right in to his kart.


He couldn't catch a break. Wasn't easy being Larry.

"I have an aunt who works with special needs kids, Larry. She's certified to teach you basketball, if you want." Vlad offered.

"My eyeliner is running! Stop!" Annie wailed. "It burns!"

"All of you suck dick." Larry retorted.

He was firmly holding on to last place.

"Annie doesn't." Mike advocated on behalf of the lesbian amongst them.

"Dick is gross." She confirmed, retching at the thought. "I can live without it."

"Can't relate."

That almost sent Vlad in to hysterics. Mike can't live without dick? Who would have thought?

"Ryan and Bloodrayne aren't here, so I'm outnumbered by elite homos."

"If you can't beat us, join us." Vlad suggested, through laughter, once he calmed down enough to get the words out.

"I wouldn't know how. Like, how does butt sex even work?" Larry mused. "I imagine it's like trying to make a peanutbutter and jelly sandwich, but all you've got is dick and ass. So you're like: 'Yeah. Guess that'll work.' Then your mom walks in to the kitchen and you're fucking grounded."

That may have been both the worst, and the best, description I'd ever heard. My ribs briefly rattled with laughter I was silently holding in as to not give away my presence. Mike felt me, and almost laughed because of it.

"And? That's totally worth getting grounded for."

"The trick is to take the sandwich to your room." Mike interjected, coming up on his final lap. "You act like it's your first day being gay."

"Well, if I'm grounded I'm going to be in my room anyways."

"Vladimir, get your shit together. I swear to God."

Annie snorted at the manner in which Mike chose to address Vlad.

"I love how you scolded him as if that's his real full name." She commented, genuinely finding it funny.

That raised a question. What was his real name?

"Vlad", and that silver-haired girl "Bloodrayne" were the only two who went by their vampire aliases. I knew her real name was "Katie". I can't recall if I'd ever heard Vlad addressed as anything else.

"He's been 'Vlad' since the fifth grade." Larry explained the obvious. "He may as well just legally be Vladimir."

"My mother would tear me a new one. I can already hear her: 'I didn't give birth to any Vladimir!' she'll scream, storming in to City Hall before I can sign the paper."

"Dude, how disorientated would you be if we all started calling you 'Vince', again?"

Mystery solved. His name's Vince.

"Uh, very? It sounded weird coming out of your mouth, just now."

"It felt weird when I said it, truth be told."

Mike crossed the finish line, in first place, shortly followed by Vlad. Then, Annie. And, Larry. Annie excused herself for a bathroom break before starting the next race after having laughed hard enough to leak make up in to her eyes. Vlad and Ryan went to get snacks.

"Do you want anything from the kitchen before they all come back?" Mike turned off the microphone on his headset.

"I'll be fine until Dinner."

He took a hand off of his controller to stroke my back.

"You're the first person I've seen gain weight with the flu." He appraised, content that I was less boney to the touch.

"All I did was sleep and eat. You should know."

"Without all that crap in your system you have your appetite back. It's a good thing."

Forced to quit cold turkey via illness, I didn't smoke for eight days. The worst of it got all mixed in with the rest of the misery I already felt. Now, although the habit lingered in my brain, I wasn't craving it.

Remembering the smell of Michael's coat right before I stopped breathing gave me an unconscious aversion that helped steer me away. Negative association.

I missed my coffee, however. That was something I'd wean back on to. In moderation, Mike would make sure of it. Can't take away everything.

"...Mike, could you scratch my back?" I requested, feeling an itch coming on where he was touching me over my shirt.

"Of course."

Pulling up the hem at the back of my shirt, Mike started scratching at my spine with the ends of his nails.

", little to your left." I squirmed to one side. "Other left."

"That would be my right."

"Ah! Just scratch it. I'm itchy." I wriggled, trying to direct him where the itch was killing me.

"You're silly, that's what you are. 'Other left', pft."

He got me on the right spot and I took a clipped breath, curling my back in. Ooo, that's the stuff. Lord, have mercy.

"You got it all." I sighed in relief.

"That was a nice little squirm you had going."

Nails going south, Mike made it to my hip and then swiftly trailed up my side. It tickled, setting me off in to a fit of wiggles with a startled squeal.

Yeah. You read that right. I squealed.

"Ohhhh...what was that?" Devilishly delighted, Mike got a trouble-making gleam in his eye. "Is my baby bat ticklish?"

"You surprised me." I lied through my teeth, prepared to make a break for it. "Fuck off, I'm not ticklish."

"Baby bat's a Liar~"

The loving embrace I sought out from Mike trapped me in his arms. He foiled my escape. I fought tooth and nail to break free with his fingers coming down on me. When I did rip myself away, the escape was short-lived.

"Come back here~" Taking my ankle in hand, Mike dragged me in and climbed over me. "Not getting away that easily."

Jumping in to action, I used my hands to defend myself and bat Mike's away. I thrashed around, evading as many points of contact that I could.

"Mike-AH! Nnhh!"

I caught Mike's hands in a spontaneous miracle. He laced his fingers with mine and chortled at my diaphragm rising and falling with my labored puffs.

"Never do that, again."

"Hm, I wasn't finished~"

"The hell you aren't. Fucking bite me."

...oh no.

"That can certainly be arranged."

Phrasing was everything, and that's where I fucked up.

"Dancin', Dancin', Dancin's not a crime. Unless, you do it without me~" Vlad's voice came from the television upon his mic being turned back on. "Unless you do it without me~"

He sang along to some music he had playing in his room.

Mike pouted because our alone time ended, and he couldn't commence the next phase of his tomfoolery. The expression faded in to smirk. He shook his head a little listening to Vlad doing his thing, getting down with his stereo.

"I'm back! Miss me?" Vlad asked without a reply "...Guys?"

"Larry and Annie aren't back, yet." Mike reached over to turn his headset's mic back on, he didn't wear it.

"Looks like we're on stand-by, Boss."

Vlad's arrival saved me from Mike's mischief. Here I was now, jealous that his attention was going to someone else. No, correction: Vlad. His attention was going to Vlad.

"You're plenty entertained, throwing a party over there. Wouldn't call that 'stand-by'."

"Don't hate 'cause you can't party with me."

Larry returning assuaged my sour feeling, some. He put a wedge in their conversation.

"Back! I made a peanutbutter and jelly sandwich the right way." Larry, proudly, announced on over mic.

"Fuck that sandwich." Vlad scoffed.

"That's what I'm specifically trying to avoid, here. Just let me be straight, in peace. Jesus."

"...this was a bad time to come back." Annie declared, tuning in at an unfortunate moment. "What did I just hear about Larry fucking his sandwich?"

"I didn't mean it literally." Vlad defended. "Whatever floats his boat, though."

Placing himself back in his original gaming position, Mike put the headset on. He gestured for me to go over and resume my place cuddled on top of him.

"Let's get this show on the road." He told his friends.

I went back to Mike, fighting with myself over the emotional blip I encountered.

He could be friends with didn't mean anything. They had great chemistry, they vibed. That made for a strong bond.

…would we ever have that?

"We're all playing online today because you needed to keep an eye on Pete, right?" Annie asked.

"I wanted to." He corrected, happy to do so. "But, yes. Why?"

"Is he okay?"

"He's right here."

Once Mike turned on his headset, I didn't have anything to say. None of them knew I was present until now.

"Tell him 'Hi!' for me." Annie requested.

"And, that he was right about Larry." Vlad added.

A mouthful of peanutbutter and white bread nullified Larry's objection. It stuck to the roof of his mouth and he grunted, dejectedly.

"How's the peanutbutter, Larry?" I drawled with monotone sarcasm.

For the first time since logging on with his friends, Mike laughed.

"I didn't know he could hear us!" Annie busted out laughing with him realizing I was fully present for their antics.

"Mmph-I hate you guys." Larry got out after swallowing the sticky wad of bread. "Ack! Peanutbutter's good though. Thanks for asking."

Vlad asked why I wasn't playing with them. None of your fucking business, Dude.

"I can sit out a round if he wants to sync up a controller and play." Annie offered.

"He doesn't want to play." Mike explained, pointing a look down at me. "It's a shame."

"Pete, play with us!"

Eh, no. I've got the best seat in the house and I'm not giving it up.

"Another time." I declined the invitation. "I'm fine watching."

I wasn't investing much attention to the screen. Mike smirked. I blushed and put my face down to hide it.

"Come on, Man. Play a round." Larry sided with Annie.

"We rotate all the time when Bloodrayne and Ryan are here. It's no big deal." Vlad then joined them.

Mike's lips landed on the skin of my forehead that he could reach with my face all tucked down the way it was.

"Don't you worry about my baby bat. He's right where he wants to be."



Soft, muffled buzzing came from behind me. A lubed vibrating bullet being the source of said sound. In his left hand Mike held the remote attached to it, and in his right was my cock as I sat straddling his lap naked.

Forehead on Mike's unclothed shoulder, I held him with my arms around his neck. This toy of his was one of various others inside a locked safe-box under the bed ... this was the first I learned of his special sin bin.

When Mike signed off from his friends, he sought his next source of entertainment. Me. His original was intent was to have me pick something I liked. I've never owned any toys, so I let him pick.

"Better than a thermometer, wouldn't you say?"

"Could we not…Nn…bring that up right now?"

"Let's talk about that blush you keep trying to hide, instead."

"Let's not."

He buried that thing in me real good. It was easier to fit than something else that could be in there, but the vibrations set this apart from that.

My nerve endings were in an tizzy. My hips twitched as I fought the instinct to squirm down on to the denim of his jeans.

With his thumb, Mike rubbed the underside of my cock head, gliding over the wet sensitive flesh. Pre-cum beaded from the tip, providing the natural lubricant for him to do so.


I was getting used to the toy inside me, focusing more on Mike's attention to my dick. The pad of his thumb rubbed with precision, and gentle pressure. Sensation concentrated in that one spot. I didn't ever want him to stop.

"Enjoying yourself?" Mike coo'ed lowly.

"…you're touching me just right." I moaned softly. "If you keep doing that, I'm going to cum."

The blush that I refused to show Mike stained my cheeks with a pink glow. He found it endearingly cute, trying to coax me out of my defensive shell.

"I'd like to see for myself. Look at me, baby bat."

"You're putting me on the spot…"

"So shy when you're vulnerable..I'm rather smitten with you."

His sweet praise, in unison with the pleasure, turned my insides to hot, gelatinous pulp. The heat wafted up from my lower belly, steaming the cavity of my chest. It escaped my body in tepid, even, pants.

My heart was fluttering like the wings of a humming bird. I thought it would burst with Mike's next words.

"My darling little creature~"

My heart must've been hard-wired to my dick. I wanted to be as physically close as I could be to him.

"…s-so close…don't stop…" Clinging to him, I caved to the urge. "…Ahh-AH!"

There was a single click, and my voice shot up both in octave and volume. I began whimpering helplessly at the intense spike in sensation.

"Did I forgot to mention this has adjustable settings?" Purring the teasing words to me, Mike left the remote to sit on the bedspread.

I began showing signs I was going to finish, restlessly fidgeting and writhing in his lap. He put two fingers under my chin.

"Let me watch."

He pressed up, to urge me to lift my face. I let him guide me to do it. His sultry hazel eyes locked with mine.

"Your eyes shimmer when you're close." He soaked in the glassy, emerald shine.

"I'm so close." I breathed, breaking out in to lilting moans. "Mike…oh…Mike…"

"That's it. Sing me my name, baby bat."

Everything disappeared but Mike. There was just his touch, and him. I was deaf to even myself mid climax.

He heard me. My pleasured cries were no sound I'd produced before. It couldn't compare to Mike's heavenly symphony, but I acquired my own melody. It dwindled out as my body shuddered with the aftershock.

Using some nearby tissues to clean off his hand, Mike chucked the wadded-up ball in to the small trash bin on the floor. With both hands now available, he held me, savoring tension in my shivering muscles slipping away right under his touch.

"You're shaking." Mike said, cradling me close to ease me down the post-orgasmic trembles.

"...I can't stop shaking."

I laid my face in the crook of his neck, debilitated in this euphoric haze. I really couldn't stop shaking. It wasn't an unsettling feeling. My body was just coming down from the rush.

"You've never experienced that before." Affectionately, Mike held me tighter. "Deprived little bat."

I melted more, warm and fuzzy all over as if the sun were kissing my skin in the dead of December. It was Mike. The warmth, it radiated off him, permeating me from the outside in.

His world nurtured life. His world had sunshine.

It wasn't a fairytale.

"I knew you weren't cold like them." Mike relished my receptiveness to his affections.


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