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Very Sexy Babysitters	By : Jayrich Category: +1 through F > Fairly OddParents Views: 59001 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 8
Disclaimer: I do not own Fairly OddParents, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Very Sexy Babysitters

“(Sighs) Another day of Boring, Dull, not at all exciting School.” Timmy Turner sits at his desk, bored and expecting the worse of today, since just a few days ago, Mr. Crocker got the closest to catching Timmy with his Fairy Godparents. Timmy looks down at his Green Pencil & Pink Eraser, who are really his Fairy Godparents, Cosmo & Wanda. Wanda looks up at Timmy with motherly worry. “Timmy, what’s the matter? You seem so glum, today?” “I don’t know. I’m just afraid that Mr. Crocker is gonna catch you one of these days and reveal our secret, then you’ll have to go away forever.” Wanda smiles up at him. “Aw, don’t worry, Timmy. Crocker’s about as Dim as Cosmo when he’s playing 20 Questions.” Just then, Cosmo interrupts, thinking it’s a Game. “OOH! I love 20 Questions! Is it a fruit? Can you eat it? Can you take it into the Bathroom?” Timmy ignores Cosmo’s ranting. “Still, I don’t want anything to happen to you.” Just then, someone is heard coming to the Classroom Door, which makes Timmy start to panic. “QUICK! I wish you two was back at my house till School ended!” POOF! In an instant they’re back at Timmy House.

A Gentleman carrying a Suitcase walks into the room. He puts the Suitcase down on the desk and begins to address the crowd. “Hello, Students. My name is Mr. Dreary. I’m the Substitute Teacher for Mr. Crocker, who’s being held at the Dimmsdale Sanitarium until further notice.” The Kids in the classroom wait a moment, then start partying like they won the Lottery. A.J. & Chester begin dancing on their desks, as Timmy leads them all, with a big smile on his face. “Substitute Teacher Day! The Greatest Day in a 13-year-old’s life…like me! I should’ve wished for Cosmo & Wanda to stay her and help me slack off.” While the kids keep partying, Mr. Dreary sets up a TV in front of the Chalkboard. He plugs up a VCR into it and puts in a Tape, before turning to the kids and clearing his throat to get their attention. “AHEM!” The Kids stop their elevation to see what the Teacher wants. “Now, Students. We will be watching a film to educate your primitive little minds. Enjoy.”

The Kids sit down, expecting to see a great movie. Timmy waits impatiently. “Boy! I hope it’s the Crocodile Special they showed last week. It was Violent & Educational! But mostly violent. YAY VIOLENCE!!!” The VCR plays as an Announcer can be heard starting off the movie. “Welcome children. Today, we will be learning about the Birds & the Bees. This is Johnny…and this is Susan…” And with that, Timmy and the rest of the Class watch the film, and learn more than they ever wanted to know.

A few hours later…

The video ends as the entire class stands there in shock of what they just watched. Timmy’s the first one to say anything. “Whoa…” A.J. backs him up. “You said it.” Chester finally breaks the trance. “I don’t know what that was all about, but I refuse to believe that THAT can be done with Girls! Don’t they know that they have Cooties?” A.J. snaps out of it himself. “Chester, for the last time, Girls don’t have Cooties. I did every scientific test and they were all Conclusive.” “LIES!!! All of your tests and computers spit out Lies!!!” Near the back of the class sits Trixie & her best Friend Veronica and others. They were also all shocked by the movie. Trixie breaks her silence. “That movie was…interesting. Hmm, I wonder what Tad & Chad thought about it. Did it give them some ideas?” Veronica has a devious grin on her face as she stares at Timmy without him noticing. “Like, I’m getting some ideas of what I could do with Timmy Turner.” “What did you just say?” Veronica snaps out of it and realizes Trixie was listening. “Uh…I mean, Timmy Turner. ICK! He’s such a loser!” Trixie shrugs and goes to talk with her other friends as Veronica goes back to staring at Timmy, which sends a cold shiver down his back! “BBRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! Where did that cold chill come from?”

A few more hours later…

Timmy returns home and heads straight for his Room, where he sees Cosmo & Wanda having a Magic Fight. Cosmo’s a Boxing Glove, and Wanda’s a Bar-B-Q Grill. Timmy walks past the two not paying attention. “Hi, Cosmo. Hi, Wanda.” He jumps on his bed and lays down as the 2 Fairy Godparents turn back into themselves. Wanda looks concerned again. “Well, what’s wrong this time, Timmy?” Cosmo interrupts. “Yeah! You look like something the Vicky dragged in.” Timmy sits up from his bed. “Nothing. I was just thinking about today. We had a Substitute Teacher for our class and he showed a movie about Sexual Education.” Wanda’s eyes widen and a look of fear is on her face. “Oh, no. No! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Both Timmy & Cosmo look at her strangely. “Uh…uh…I think I left my Casserole on in the Castle!” POOF! Wanda turns into a Goldfish and lands in their Fish Bowl, swimming back into the Castle. Timmy continues. “The movie taught me about my body parts, and how to use my penis & stuff, but I still have a lot of questions. Is this ‘Sex’ thing Good or Bad?” Cosmo gets a wide grin on his face. “Boy, Timmy. It’s the best thing ever. You can have Sex with anyone, anywhere. Hell, you can even have Sex…” POOF! A Gag appears over Cosmo’s mouth as Wanda Poofs back from the Fish Bowl. “Underwater! Cosmo meant to say Underwater.” Timmy figures out something is up with Wanda. “Hey, why are you being so…Oh, Crap. BATHROOM!!!” He gets up from his bed and runs out of the Room as Cosmo Poofs the Gag off himself. “Well, you won’t find it that way!”

As Timmy turns the corner, Wanda turns her attention to Cosmo. “Oh, no. OH, NO!” Cosmo looks confused (as usual). “Why are you freaking out this time, Wanda?” “Because, I was hoping that we’d leave Timmy by the time they taught him ‘The Birds & The Bees.’” Cosmo gets offended. “What’s so bad about Birds & Bees? They’re creatures, too. How can you be so cruel?” “I’m talking about Sex, Idiot!” Cosmo finally gets it. “Oh. Well, what’s so Bad about Sex?” “Cosmo, don’t you remember the last Godchild we were with when they taught him about Sex? He made me wish my Breast were huge and my ass were Gigantic. We had 3-ways each & every night. It was horrible, Cosmo! Cosmo?” She looks over to see Cosmo drooling uncontrollably, with a huge grin on his face, as he remembers everything she said. Wanda gets pissed off. “COSMO!!!” He snaps back to normal. “What? I wasn’t thinking about the Good Old Days!” “Yeah, well just don’t mention to Timmy that it’s not against the Rules to have Sex with your Godparent. I’ve had enough Freaky Sex to last forever.” Timmy comes back from the bathroom and lies back down in his bed. “You know what, I’m not gonna think about this anymore. Because Tomorrow’s Saturday! And my Parents are taking me to the Beach! It’s gonna be nothing but Sun & Fun.”

The Next Day…

Timmy sits in the backseat of his Parents Station Wagon, wearing Swim Trunks. Cosmo & Wanda are there with him as his Bucket & Shovel. Timmy’s Dad is driving the car as he pulls into the Parking Lot. Timmy’s Mom is in the Passengers seat. “We’re here, Son.” Timmy smiles and grabs his Bucket & Shovel, before jumping out of the car, ready to seize the day. “Alright! Time to Surf till I drop!” He runs onto the beach and gets close to the water when a long leg comes out and trips him, causing him to land face first into the Sand. He gets up and spits all of the sand out of his mouth, then looks up to see the Perpetrator…Vicky. “YOU? What are You doing here?” “Shaking Down twerps for their Snack Money. I’m saving up to buy a new Book. ‘How to make a Buck-Toothed Child’s life a Living Hell.’” She laughs fiendishly as she walks away, kicking sand in Timmy’s face. He rubs the sand off and picks himself up. “You know what, I’m not gonna let anything ruin this day. Not even Vicky!” He digs Cosmo & Wanda out of the sand, but Cosmo looks upset. “Hey! You ruined my Ostrich impression.” “Quiet, you! I wish you guys were Surfboards.” POOF! Cosmo & Wanda turn into separate Surfboards. Timmy grabs both of them and makes a beeline towards the water.

Vicky is walking off feeling proud of herself when she sees a Cute Lifeguard that she goes Gaga over. She moves closer and leans on him, looking at him with Seductive eyes. “Hi there, Hunk-sicle. Let’s say you & me make some Waves.” The Lifeguard looks at her, then turns his head. “With a Chest like that, Dudette, you couldn’t make a tiny splash.” He walks away to his elevated chair, leaving Vicky feeling dejected. “DAMMIT!!! It’s not my fault my breasts haven’t grown. WHY CAN’T I HAVE HUGE TITS?” She storms up the beach angry, knocking over a huge Sand Castle and burying several kids who were building it under the sand. “GRRRRRRRRR!!! I need to blow off some steam!” She looks out to the water and sees Timmy performing tricks on his 2 Surfboards on a Big Wave. An evil smile comes on her face. “And I know just how to do it.” She turns her back and heads over to a Surfboard Shop, as all you can hear is her evil Laughter. She walks into the shop and sees a Green Trick Surfboard hanging on the wall. Evil thoughts formulate in her mind as she grabs the Board and slams some money on the counter to pay for it. She leaves the shop as the Clerk calls out to her. “Wait, Dudette! That’s a Trick Surfboard! It’s set to fall apart when it hits water.” She looks back at him with an evil grin. “I know.”

Timmy’s pulling off great tricks as he rides a Big Wave with Cosmo & Wanda holding him up. He does a Handstand, with each hand on the Board and looks to the Beach, where he sees Trixie lying on a Blanket in the sand, watching him. “This is it. This is my chance to totally impress Trixie, and make her my Girlfriend.” Wanda’s face appears on the Pink Surfboard as she looks up at Timmy. “What’re you gonna do, sport?” “I’m gonna attempt a Triple Back Flip Timmy Tuck Somersault. That’s sure to get her attention. Here I Go!” Timmy jumps up in the air and attempts his flip, when Vickie tosses her Trick Surfboard into the wave. The Board hits Cosmo, taking his place and knocking him off course. Timmy successfully performs his Triple Back Flip Timmy Tuck Somersault and tries to stick the landing when his foot hits the Trick Surfboard…and the Board shatters. Timmy goes face first into the water, and after a moment, is washed up ashore with a Starfish on his face & Cosmo & Wanda buried face down in the sand (as Surfboards).

Vickie laughs maniacally as she dives in the water and swims out to get her Surfboard. Timmy slowly pulls off the Starfish from his face, to show a look of Pure Rage. He turns to see about Trixie, and catches her being impressed by Chad & Tad and their Money, which just ticks him off more. “I was so close. I was so close to impressing Trixie…and Vickie ruined it for me.” He stands up and looks at her laughing in the water, as Cosmo & Wanda Poof themselves out of the sand, since no one’s close by. “She’s always ruining things for me. I’ll never get anything as long as she’s around!” Timmy starts thinking about her being heavier, so she wouldn’t float and she would drown to the bottom. “GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!! I WISH VICKIE HAD A HUGE CHEST!!!!” Cosmo’s eyes light up as bright as his wand. “YOU GOT IT!” Wanda dives trying to stop him. “Cosmo, NOOOOO!!!!” POOF! It’s too late. Cosmo grants the wish, and Vickie’s chest develop Melon-sized Breasts. This takes her by surprise as Timmy stands there with a Superior Smirk.

“Good. Now Vickie’s heavier, and she’ll sink underwater. And I didn’t even wish her dead.” Wanda floats over to Timmy to break the news. “Um, Timmy. It doesn’t really work like that.” Cosmo floats over to the other side of Timmy. “Yeah. Actually, what you gave her are kind of like Floatation Devices. BIG Floatation Devices.” Cosmo starts to Dream & Drool like last time, as Timmy get even angrier. “WHAT? You mean she won’t sink? Screw this, I’m handling this myself.”
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Very Sexy Babysitters