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Total Drama Universal Restraints Inn	By : Flashlight & Zetastrophe-Now Category: +S through Z > Total Drama Island Views: 14143 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: This is a non-profit fan-based parody. Total Drama and it's characters are copyrighted property of Teletoon, Fresh TV, Tom McGillis, and Jennifer Pertsch. Please support the official release.

Chapter List
- 8
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After walking through the cherry wood doors, Ira watched his nurses take Lindsay and Beth to the inn, where they will be promptly cleaned. Once the girls were out of his sight, Ira walked up the stairwell of the four-floored palace. Note to self... Give Heather a bit of customer service.
Upon setting foot on the top floor, Ira heard the sound of footsteps, growing louder and louder as they approached him. Upon turning to his right, he saw Chris McLean walking down the halls. Chris approached Ira with some news. "Ira, I have a perfect idea for Leshaw-"
"Screw that! I'm going with Blaineley this time!"
"But what abou-"
"Shut it and trust me on this one. You'll like this."
"Uhh..."
"Heck, I got my favorite Total Drama World Tour song on my iPhone." Ira pulled out his cell phone and pressed the play button on it. The iPhone played the song Her Real Name Isn't Blaineley, a song sung by a Total Drama contestant solely to make a mockery out of Blaineley. Ira sung along with the contestant's words throughout the minute the song played. Upon finishing the song, Ira looked at an annoyed Chris with a smile.
"Fine... If it will stop you from acting like a weirdo, we'll go with Blaineley..."
"Okay then."
"Besides, she claimed that she was going to be the host Total Drama, which bugs me so."
"Well, the reason why I dislike her was because she panned my hotel without giving it a chance. Unreasonable bondage my ass! If you back art into a corner, than art will fight back!"
"How?"
"By humiliating her, only in a way worse than Geoff could think of."
"How?"
"Diapers..."
"Really, Ira? Really?"
"Well, Blaineley messed with el toro. Now, she'll get los cuernos."
Chris shrugged and walked away. "If you need me, I'll be at the Daemon Wing."
Ira speed-dialed an operator and gave him a call. "Hello, operator? I'll need a few numbers."
Thirty minutes later, Ira is at an auditorium. Ira is at the far left side of a stage, grilling some hot dogs for a quick snack. Perhaps this was something Ira is doing since little is known about Ira's cooking skills. His culinary talent is perhaps why Ira wanted to make Universal Restraints Inn a 5-star hotel.
From a distance, Blaineley glared at Ira. Blaineley is a sexy chick whose golden hair reached below her F-cup breasts. Her eyes were as blue as turquoise earrings. Speaking of earrings, Blaineley wore a large, red pair of them on her ears. Blaineley's red dress covers her body all the way to her thighs, and her high-heeled shoes bore the same shade of red all over.
An eyeglass-wearing girl whose orange hair is tied in a bun appeared behind Ira.
"Scarlett... Just in time."
"Thanks. It's nice to meet you, Mr. Spooner."
"I'll say the same to you, too. Well, good luck on your audition,"
"Okay then."
Ira went up to Scarlett's ear, as if he was hiding something from Blaineley. "Remember," Ira whispered. "Hope that Blaineley meets your aunt."
"Okay, sir." Scarlett walked onstage and approached a wooden bar stool in the middle of the stage. She sat down, prepared to make her audition.
"Scarlett. Looks like you're here for a new Total Drama competition. Are you ready to answer a couple of questions?"
"Yes, Blaineley."
"Okay, what are your qualities?"
"Well, I am both intelligent and resourceful. My favorite school subject is physics."
"Right... Now, for the other question. What would you do if you won the million dollars?"
"Well, I'll have you know, green is the color of money and my eyes. If I win the million, then I'll probably use it to study at a university of my choosing."
"Boring... Next!"
Scarlett went off the stage, and another girl came. The girl with tan-skinned girl who had the appearance of Snooki entered the stage.
"Anne Maria... Looking good..."
"Thanks."
"So, is there anything that will help you throughout the season?"
"Well, I'm sure my looks will have the boys come running for me."
"Okay then... Now, for the other question. What would you do if you won the million dollars?"
"Well, I think I could use some of it to fund a porno I'm thinking about doing."
"Really?"
"Yeah, I'm thinking about a Jersey Shore parody."
"Okay... Next!"
Out went Anne Maria, and in came a hillbilly with short, orange hair. The hillbilly had freckles on his cheeks, and he had dark, bluish-gray eyes. Above all, he had a severe case of bad body odor.
"Man..." Blaineley pinched her nose. "What is that stench?! Is that you, Scott?"
"I haven't used any cologne for months."
"Ugh... Is there anything besides your b-o that would help you make it to the top?"
"Who eliminated a psychic from a reality TV series?"
"Um... You?"
"Exactly. All I needed to do is use some cunning motives and BAM! No more psychics..."
"Right... So, what would you do if you won the million dollars?"
"I'd probably use it to make Courtney and Dawn my personal maids for a year, even if the duties are sexual."
"Ugh... Would you get out of here you creep?!"
"Fine..." Scott walked off the stage, taking his horrid odor with him.
"Okay, who's next?"
A Hispanic man with a soul patch under his chin appeared. His green eyes instantaneously captured Blaineley's attention.
"Alejandro... Man... You're so... Hot..."
"¡Gracias, señorita!"
"So... How will you win this season?"
"Easy. With a little charm and a hint of manipulation, I will win the prize."
"Nice... Speaking of which, what will you spend the money on?"
"You know, I'm hoping that Heather and I go on a date at my homeland. I'll use the money for a nice, Mexican vacation with her."
"Okay then... Next!"
Alejandro left the stage, giving Blaineley a smile along the way. After Alejandro left, Owen entered the stage, carrying all 300 pounds of his weight with him.
"Hey Owen. Long time, no see."
"Thanks, Blaineley," Owen laughed shortly after speaking.
"You know, I think you have the guts to win this. What would you do if you won the million dollars?"
"I'd say... Party at Camp Wawanakwa!"
"Um, no offense, but the island's never coming back."
"Aw, man!"
"Sorry, hon. I guess it wasn't meant to be."
"Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!?"
Blaineley got up and walked onto the stage. Upon approaching Owen, she hugged him, comforting Owen in the process.
Ira watched the scene, annoyed by the sudden sense of compassion Blaineley showed to Owen. Okay, that's just cheesy.
Ira looked at the line, looking for something to help him capture Blaineley. He saw Sugar at the back of the line, sensing a bit of hope in her. Sugar is an ugly girl who weighed just as much as Sadie. Sugar's blonde hair is bundled into a large bun at the top, and the rest of it reached past her shoulders. Her blue eyes do not help fix Sugar's ugly face; they only allow her to stare into people's souls.
"Sugar, I'll need you at the front of the line."
"What for?"
"Just get up there..." Ira pushed Sugar to the front of the line, much to the group's disappointment. Ira watched the stage, waiting for Blaineley to get back on stage.
Blaineley returned minutes later, bearing a sympathetic look on her face. She walked back to her table, making sure that everything is settled before the auditions carried on.
"Okay, who's next?" Blaineley asked.
"Me!" Sugar shouted in enthusiasm.
A disgusted Blaineley watched Sugar run onto the stage. What the fuck is that thing?!
"Hello! Are you the hostess?"
"Yes..." Blaineley tried to hold back an urge to puke. "Could you wait there for a moment? I have to go to the bathroom."
"Okay then."
Blaineley briskly walked out of the auditorium, making sure that Sugar is out of her sight. Blaineley looked around for a dressing room, hoping to find something to protect herself. She found a room at the third door on her right. Yes! Blaineley opened the door and looked inside. Blaineley saw a plague doctor mask and a matching uniform sitting on a hanger at the other side of the room. "Just what I need." Blaineley walked inside and closed the door behind her. While walking in the room, Blaineley heard a mysterious woosh beside her. She shrugged it off and walked toward the outfit, only to hear a louder woosh. "What was that?"
Eventually, a domme appeared in front of Blaineley. The domme's amber-colored eyes looked at Blaineley with an intention to stare her down. The domme's brown hair was wrapped in a bun much like Scarlett's. The domme was, indeed, Scarlett's aunt. "Hello..."
Blaineley ran for the door as fast as she could. She ran and ran and ran until she tripped and fell before the door. Blaineley stood up and tried to turn the handle of the door, but it was locked. "Hey..! What's going on?"
In a confessional, Scott gave a smirk to the camera while holding a key.
"You know, acting is fun, especially when you lock an annoying celebrity in a wardrobe with a dominatrix from the Daemon Wing a few minutes later."
Back at the scene, Blaineley backed herself against the door as Scarlett's aunt approached her.
"You've been a bad girl, Mildred..." Scarlett's aunt said.
"Hey..! What did I do?!"
"It's not what you have done, but what you're doing now. Now, remove your garments."
After hearing such words from Scarlett's aunt, Blaineley stood up against her. "What do you think I am?! A prostitute?!"
Scarlett's aunt smirked with confidence. Scarlett lashed at Blaineley with a riding crop, giving Blaineley the Mark of Zorro as the cane stripped Blaineley of her dress. Curiously, Blaineley was not wearing any lingerie under the dress.
"Hey!" What was that for?!"
"You should have listened to your superior, Mildred..." Scarlett's aunt pulled out a large diaper that was sitting between her breasts and tossed it to Blaineley. "Now, put that diaper on."
"Hey, I don't have incontinence, you creep! Besides, you have to be crazy if you think that I will wear this!"
"Well, if that's how you're going to behave, then so be it." Scarlett's aunt swung her crop against Blaineley's vagina and landed a couple more whacks against Blaineley's large breasts.
Blaineley groaned. "Fine... I'll do it if it'll get you to stop hitting me."Blaineley slipped on the diaper, which caused Blaineley to lose some of her dignity.
"Now..," Scarlett's aunt walked to a couple of boxes and grabbed a bodysuit designed specifically for humiliating Blaineley. The suit was a heavily-padded leather suit that appeared to be an enlarged version of a baby's pink bunny costume save for the attached cuffs around the wrists and legs. The mitts and boots of the suit appeared to be bunny paws. The attached hood, on the other hand, had a more peculiar appearance. It appeared to be a full-enclosure hood with a pacifier and a baby bonnet with bunny ears. "I order you to wear this."
"And what if I said no?"
"You're getting annoying, Mildred."
Blaineley sighed. "Fine..." Blaineley took the suit and put it on. It was easy for Blaineley to put herself in the leggings of the suit, but the difficult part was getting her arms in the sleeves. Scarlett's aunt tugged at the sleeves, making sure that Blaineley was secured in the suit. Scarlett's aunt then zipped the suit shut, leaving Blaineley in an embarrassing situation.
"Okay, Scott! You could unlock the door now!"
Scott unlocked the door and opened it for the two girls. He then took a look at Blaineley and laughed. "Looks like the Easter Bunny's got a girlfriend!"
Scarlett's aunt watched Scott walk away in his laughter before making Blaineley move.
"Get moving, bitch!" Scarlett's aunt raised her crop into the air, ready to hit Blaineley again.
"Mlrmmt, Mlrmmt! Mm gmming!"
Blaineley slowly walked out of the room, blinded by the thick hood over her eyes. Scarlett's aunt followed along, guiding Blaineley with the cane.
Upon entering the stage, Blaineley heard the sound of people laughing. Blaineley's eyes widened in surprise and embarrassment. I've been hoodwinked... Blaineley thought.
To keep Blaineley from running into the crowd, Scarlett's aunt hit Blaineley on the side, persuading Blaineley to move away from the group.
"Stop!" Scarlett's aunt said.
Blaineley stopped dead on her tracks, unsure about what is going on.
"I'll see you later, Scarlett." Scarlett's aunt ruffed up Scarlett's hair.
"I'll see you later as well, auntie.".
Scarlett's aunt lightly pushed Blaineley with her left hand, making Blaineley move in the process. Upon taking Blaineley outside, Scarlett's aunt stopped Blaineley. Scarlett's aunt then picked Blaineley up and carried her to a crib sitting at the back of a carriage. The crib was larger than a normal crib: large enough to fit Blaineley in and keep her from getting out. The crib's door was already opened, allowing Scarlett's aunt to put Blaineley inside. Scarlett's aunt set Blaineley on the floor of the crib, further putting Blaineley in her position. Scarlett's aunt closed the crib door and locked it before walking to the passenger seat of the carriage.
Ira and Chris watched the carriage spirit away with Blaineley, enjoying the last moments of her embarrassing moments outside the inn. Ira and Chris shook hands with each other, congratulating each other on their victory.

Author's Notes: Blaineley was put in the Daemon Wing because of Zetastrophenow's disdain towards her. I, personally, would rather remain neutral. Of course Blaineley was shown to be self-conscious in the series.
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Total Drama Universal Restraints Inn