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Aventure Amoureuse	By : Baron Category: +M through R > Miraculous LadyBug Views: 5012 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction for adults. Miraculous Ladybug and its characters are not mine, and are the property of ZAG-inc. I make no profit from this and all characters are 18+.

Chapter List
- 69
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- 71
You wander naked around Adrien's bedroom. Your clothes are in the laundry hamper and you're the only one in the room. Adrien left for his Chinese lesson and took Plagg with him. You put away your belongings making sure to hide your duffel bag under his bed, but you keep your MAC50 in your jacket pocket in case you need it. You put on your jacket and decide to pass the time by smoking one of Jagged's joints on the balcony overlooking the front yard. Adrien's dad must be pretty paranoid and insecure as there's a thick concrete wall surrounding the entire mansion that's about a meter thick and several meters tall. As you stand there smoking and looking at the wall, you notice a black guy climb over it and sneak through the yard. "Who the fuck is THIS guy? What kind of an idiot robs a mansion in broad daylight?" you ponder as you watch the young man creep closer to the house. You hide in Adrien's room and stay out of sight as you continue to watch him. You notice that he's climbing the trellis below you. He was sneaking into Adrien's bedroom! "You just robbed the WRONG house, asshole!" you mutter under your breath as you hide behind a corner and pull your MAC50 out of your jacket pocket. You glance over at Adrian's trophy case watching the young man climb into Adrien's window and enter the room in the reflection of the glass. You take a moment to get a better look at him. He was a tall, thin, black guy with a blue shirt, a red baseball cap, and thick Buddy Holly glasses. He also wore a pair of orange headphones around his neck. He looked a bit too nerdy to be a robber, but you weren't taking any chances with him. He looks around the room with his back turned as you take this opportunity to sneak up behind him. "Adrien? Are you home? I got these fresh new tracks I just finished working on, and I want you to listen to-" he begins to say as you press the muzzle of your pistol against the back of his head. "Good morning!" you say with a smirk as you prepare to paint Adrien's wall with a fresh coat of the intruder's brains. "Adrien, bud! I was hoping that I'd catch you!" the inruder says happily as he turns around and sees you. His happy smile quickly fades into a panicked expression as he realizes that he's looking down the barrel of a powerful French handgun. "On the contrary, I believe it is I who have caught you!" you grin at him as you cock the hammer back and press the gun into his forehead. "Oh, shit! Lemme guess... Adrien's new bodyguard, right? Did Mr. Agreste fire Gorilla or something?" the young robber asks you as he crosses his eyes attempting to focus on the gun pressed between them. "I have the gun, I'll ask the fucking questions around here! Let's start with an easy one: Who the fuck are you?" you ask the young man angrily as you're in no mood for his games. "Uh... I'm Nino. Nino Lahiffe! I'm Adrien's best friend!" the young man informs you. "Right... do friends usually break in through the window?" you ask in response. "Well, how did YOU get in here then? And why aren't you wearing any pants?" Nino asks gesturing to your bottomless lower body. "You're asking questions again. What did I just say about questions? I take it you're not a very fast learner." you say as you begin to lose your patience. "Hey... wait a minute! I know you! You're that person from all those wanted posters! How do I know that YOU'RE not the one who doesn't belong here? Adrien never mentioned you before, and your hair is too long and you have WAY too many tattoos to be hired by Mr. Agreste! Why don't I just scream as loud as I can and find out which one of us Gorilla rips apart first?" Nino sneers at you defensively as Adrien walks into the room and slowly blinks in shock. "Um... what's going on here?" Adrien asks as he watches his bottomless fiance point a gun at his best friend's face.
"THIS ASSHOLE IS TRYING TO ROB YOU!" you and Nino both say simultaneously as you point your fingers at each other. "Ugh. I was afraid something like this might happen, I'm just surprised it happened so soon. Please put the gun down, my amour. This is my friend Nino. Nino, this is my fiance and lover." Adrien says as he rubs his temples in frustration. "You're getting married, Adrien? We should throw a party! Um... can I ask you something? Isn't this one a little uh... rough-looking for you? You're a model, you could aim higher you know." Nino says as he points his thumb at you. "Do you want to end up as a grease spot on the rug, Nino?" you sneer at him. "Ok, stop it! Put the gun away so we can talk! And why aren't you wearing any pants?" Adrien asks you sounding annoyed. "My clothes are in the laundry so I decided to Porky Pig it today." you inform him as you uncock the handgun and return it to your jacket pocket. "Listen... I don't want another incident like what happened at the airport, so I want you two to shake hands and be nice to each other. Thank god I forgot my Chinese textbook or there might have been some serious trouble!" Aidrien says sounding frustrated. "Did I miss something? What happened at the airport?" Nino asks him. "My flight was cancelled." you explain to the young man. "It's a long story, Nino. Look, I gotta go to my Chinese lesson. Please don't kill each other while I'm gone! Baby, why don't you go out on the balcony and smoke a joint with Nino? He's good people and will keep you company until I come back. Does that sound cool to you, Nino?" Adrien says trying to smooth over the rift between you and his friend. "Yeah, that's cool. Just make sure they don't shoot me!" Nino says sounding justifiably worried. "Baby? Let me see your gun!" Adrien demands sternly. "Aww, man! But I need it to shoot people!" you protest. "Give it to me now, or NO sex when I come home!" he says as he folds his arms. "Damn, dude. Seriously?" you ask disappointedly. "Which gun would you rather play with? That one? Or mine?" Adrien says as he grabs your wrist and puts your hand down the front of his pants as he rubs his warm penis against it. "Fine, here." you say as you hold the gun by the barrel and begrudgingly hand it to him handle first. "How do I get the bullets out?" he asks as he curiously inspects your MAC50. "This button." you say as you press the clip release button allowing the magazine to fall out into his hand. "Here, you can have this back. This is mine now. You can have it back when I come home." Adrien says as he playfully bops you on the head with the ammo clip and happily kisses you before returning your empty handgun to you and pocketing your ammunition. "Daww! That's so sweet!" Nino teases you and Adrian as he clasps his hands together. "Nino, I will smack the fucking shit out of you!" you threaten the young wiseass. "No! None of that! I want you two to be friends! Now shake hands and apologize to each other!" Adrien demands as he crosses his arms angrily. "Fine, I'll play nice with the little weasel." you grumble. "Shake hands, BOTH of you!" he repeats. "Whatever, nice to meet you. I'm Nino." Nino grumbles as he holds out his hand. "Pleased to meet you, Nino. Sorry for trying to kill you and stuff." you say as you shake his hand and tell him your name. "There, was that so hard? I'm going to my Chinese lesson now, promise me you won't murder each other or blow up my house while I'm gone!" Adrien says as he grabs his Chinese textbook and happily waves you both goodbye as he leaves for his lesson.
"So are we smoking or fighting? I'm not scared of you, so either one is fine with me." Nino says to you surprising you with his bravery as Adrien shuts the door. "We'll smoke first and see how it plays out. If you piss me off, you're not too heavy to throw off the balcony." you smirk at him as you walk outside. "So you're Adrien's fiance, huh?" he asks as you light one of the magic joints Plagg rolled and pass it to him. "Yeah, he gave me this sick ass engagement ring when I mentioned that I like skulls." you reply as you show him your skull engagement ring with the diamond in its mouth. "That's fucking badass! Adrien's a cool dude!" Nino smiles as he hits the joint and passes it to you. "Yeah, he surprised the fuck out of me when he gave it to me. I never planned on getting married. I'm not exactly the settle down and meet your parents type." you shrug as you hit the joint and return it to Nino. "Yeah, you don't exactly look like someone Mr. Agreste would approve of. I know how that is, he doesn't approve of me either. I think he's a little bit racist and doesn't want Adrien to have any black friends." he says as he hits the joint and passes it back. "I never met Adrien's parents. I came in through the same window you did." you explain as you hit the joint and give it back. "You fucking hypocrite. You came in through the window and you almost kill me for doing the same? Are you racist too?" he teases you as you both begin to get high and enjoy each other's company. "I'm not racist! I'm an equal-opportunity ass kicker, and my fists are colorblind. I would have tried to kill you no matter what color you were. I didn't make you black, your fucking parents did." you snicker as Nino hits the joint and passes it to you. "I suppose that's fair enough. So how did you and Aidrien meet anyhow?" Nino asks you. "We uh... we had a few run-ins with each other and it kinda grew from there." you explain vaguely as you toke the joint and return it. "Can I be blunt with you?" he asks as he hits the joint and passes it. "Sure, go ahead. I respect people who are honest with me." you say as you smoke the joint. "Adrien is my friend, and I love him like a brother. If you hurt my friend, I'm going to hurt you." Nino says protectively as he watches you smoke the joint and hand it to him. "Allow me to be blunt with you in return, Nino. I respect the fact that you want to protect your friend, but don't cross the line with me. I love Adrien. I may have a lot of problems, but kicking your balls up into your throat ain't one of em'. I think it would be in both of our best interests to try to get along with each other for his sake. We both love him, just in different ways." you say as you pass the joint as a symbolic peace offering. "As long as you don't fuck with Aidrien or break his heart, I'm sure we'll get along ok. Just don't cross MY line either, Porky." he says as he tokes the joint and gestures to your nude lower half before passing it. "I respect that, Nino. You kind of remind me of a buddy of mine." you chuckle as you smile and hit the joint before passing it. "Do I? Who do I remind you of? If you say Raj from What's Happening, I'm going to hit you really hard!" Nino teases you as he smokes the joint and passes it back. "Huh. I guess you kinda do look like Raj if I squint a little bit. I was going to say that you remind me of this cabbie I know named Lamar." you explain trying to remember What's Happening episodes as you squint at Nino and hit the joint. "Lamar is my cousin." Nino informs you. "No shit? Lamar is my buddy! We've been on a few crazy adventures together. How is he doing anyway?" you ask happily suddenly having considerably more respect for Nino. "He's in the hospital. He T-boned a cop car and got whiplash. He'll be ok, but he'll be laid-up for a while." he explains as you pass him the joint.
"Fuck! I was there! It's my fault he got into a wreck! The cops were chasing me. I got thrown out of the windshield during the crash. He hit the airbag, I thought he was ok." you explain suddenly feeling guilty about getting your friend injured. "He didn't seem to upset about it, but he was pretty bummed about his cab getting wrecked." Nino explains as he hits the joint and passes it to you. "Damn, he lost his car too? I'm a fucking asshole!" you say as you take a toke to relieve your stress. "I'm sure it wasn't your fault. He'll figure something out, don't beat yourself up about it. What did you do to get the La PP on you anyway?" he asks as you pass him the joint. "It's a long story. They probably think I'm a terrorist or something." you shrug shaking your head. "Wait, La PP thinks you're a terrorist? What the fuck did you do?" Nino asks as he coughs up smoke. "Oh, the usual. You know, shot a few cops, blew up municipal property, robbed a bar... actually I didn't rob the bar, I just shot up the place, drug possession, public sex and public nudity, public intoxication..." you explain as you try to remember your rap sheet. "Holy shit! Are you a rapper or something? Because I'm a DJ at the club..." he explains as he hits the joint and passes it to you. "Nah, I'm not a rapper. I'm just a person at war with society." you shrug as you give Nino the rest of the joint to finish. "Shit, I thought you looked familiar! Alya has videos all over the Ladyblog about you! You look just like your wanted poster too!" he says as he finishes the joint. "Ladyblog? You mean that Ladybug info site that weird girl made? Why would I be on there? What videos?" you ask Nino in confusion. "Um... that weird girl is Alya. She's my girlfriend. She has a few videos of you. One is a pretty sick motorcycle jump, one is you shooting a nuclear bomb off of the Eiffel tower, one is you strangling Stormy Weather with a jump rope, and one is you getting your bare ass slapped by Chat Noir. She might have other ones too, but those were the ones I watched. She posts videos of anyone associated with Ladybug and Chat Noir." he explains as he tries to remember videos involving you. "I can't believe she recorded the ass slap one, damnit! Hey, wait a minute... Alya is your girlfriend? I fucking remember you! You were the dude who streaked the festival yesterday! You went slapping past us during the pub crawl!" you say as you try to envision him without clothing from yesterday. "Heh. Yeah, that was me. I dropped some acid and got bodypainted. I think I scared Nathaniel." he chuckles with a small blush.
You and Nino continue talking and getting to know each other becoming friends quite quickly. Adrien will probably be pleased with both of you. You should go see how Lamar is doing too.
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Aventure Amoureuse