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Love is Strong	By : harry102 Category: +M through R > New Adventures of Jonny Quest, The Views: 8124 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Jonny Quest, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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Since the moment he hung up on her, Jonny’s been sitting on his bed in a state of shock. He heard her calling back, but couldn’t bring himself to answer. He also saw the little light go off on his pone indicating that she had just left a message, but he couldn’t listen to it. Besides still being in shock by the fact that Jess didn’t tell him the idea of going away with Jordan was crazy, he’s also scared because he knows that he just made a huge mistake. He had absolutely no right to go off on her like that. She has every right to be pissed, and to call back and take his head off. Ignoring that call was a cowardly thing to do, but he figures that she’s stomped on his heart enough today, even if she doesn’t know it.

He keeps replaying their conversation over and over in his head, and the lump in is throat keeps getting larger every time he does it. His heart has yet to slow down, and it physically hurts at the moment. He feels like he’s been thrown into the ocean with his hands tied behind his back. His legs are getting tired, and he can barely stay afloat. He hates that she has so much control over his world, but he can’t make the feelings go away either. He could drown himself in fifty more girls like Mary, and it would still kill him to have to watch her with someone else. He’s never liked to think about her out with other guys, but this new guy has brought that dislike to a whole new level. He’s never hated a man so much without even meeting him. If she’s considering going away with him so quickly, then what else has she rushed into with him?

The thought of Jessie kissing him is incredibly annoying, but the thought of her being with him is unbearable. He knows that she was a virgin before she left for school, but has she given into the pressure? Did she really like this guy that much? He can’t ask her because it’s none of his business, but he still wants to know. If he asks and she tells him, it’s either going to be the biggest relief of his life or he’ll spontaneously combust on the spot. He doesn’t know how two people who know each other so well and share practically ever detail of their lives with one another have managed to dance around such an important issue.

What he does know is that sex is not something Jessie takes casually, and Jonny has gone through great efforts to subtlety let her know that he feels the same way. Jessie loves and respects her father immensely, but Jonny knows that she disapproves of the way he acts with women. In most ways, Jonny is just like Race, but not where women are concerned. He takes more after his father in that area, although his actions over the last few months might make it seem otherwise. He knows that Jessie wants her first time to be special, and for it to mean something every time. No matter how hard he tries to wrap his brain around it, Jonny can’t convince himself that Jordan can give this to her.

Jessie is the smartest person he knows, and her instincts about people are always on point. He’s sure that Jordan is smooth, but Jessie is not the type of person to fall for that crap. The more he thinks about it, the more likely it seems to him that Jessie has not slept with Jordan, which makes him feel a little better. There’s no way that Jordan could love her for real in such a short period of time. If he’s saying otherwise, than Jessie must be seeing right through it. Jonny has to believe that’s true. However, he can never be 100 sure, and that small amount of doubt isn’t something he’s been dealing with very well lately. He can’t believe that he wouldn’t know it if she were in love, but maybe she didn’t want to tell him because she thought he’d tell Race. She wouldn’t go that far if she weren’t in love though. If Jordan’s misled her into thinking he’s in love with her, if that jerk has gotten her to love him and he doesn’t feel the same way, if he’s stolen something she’s never gonna be able to get back, then there will be nowhere on this Earth that he can hide.

All Jonny really wants is for her to be happy, but he wishes he were the one she needed to be happy. He wants to be the one she comes to when she needs an ear to listen, or just a pair of arms to be held in. He wants to be the one she confides in, and spends all her free time with. He used to be all of those things before she left, and he wants to be all of them again plus more. He wants to be the one who kisses her tears away, who lifts her veil, and who makes love to her all night. He wants to be the one she builds a family and a life with. Most people would probably accuse him of being too young to feel this way, but he’s much more mature than those people give him credit for. He’s been to hell and back in his eighteen years, and Jessie’s been right there by his side. He doesn’t think he wants her, he knows that he needs her. It’s taken him twelve years to admit it to himself and, now that he finally has, it’s consuming him.

Thinking about the things you want more than anything else in this world, but know you can’t necessarily have, has this annoying tendency to make you feel helpless and out of control. Jonny has experienced these feelings numerous times over the last few months, but never more than right now. He feels like he could cry or, just as easily, break a window. He certainly can’t sleep. So he does what he always does when his mind won’t shut the hell up. He grabs his shoes and heads down to the ocean for a run. It’s always windy down by the water, but it’s even more so at 1:00 am on a December evening. Once he reaches the beach, Jonny purposely begins to run against the wind, which makes it difficult to pick up the type of speed he normally would. He can find solace for a few minutes in doing this because it’s impossible for him to focus on anything besides fighting the wind when it’s roaring so loudly inside his head. Jonny kept a steady pace for about forty-five minutes before making his way back to the Compound. Unfortunately, the wind isn’t as loud when it’s at his back.

As he’s running home, he can’t get her face out of his head, and he eventually comes to the conclusion that he as to call her back no matter how much he doesn’t want to. He can’t let her go to bed angry, or thinking he’s mad at her when she didn’t even do anything wrong. His heart is not very happy with his conscience at the moment. As he walks through the Compound back to his room, Jonny can’t help but notice all the pictures of himself with Jess on the walls. This makes him want to apologize even more, but he doesn’t know where to start. He’s never been good at admitting when he’s wrong. He still has no idea what he’s gonna say as he climbs the stares, but he picks up the phone the second he walks into his bedroom and dials her number before he can convince himself not to call.

Every ring makes his heart beat a little bit faster, until he finally hears that familiar voice pick up.

“Hey,” he heard her whisper softly.

“Hey,” he repeated, trying not to sound like he felt.

“I’m so sorry,” they said in unison, and an unusually awkward silence followed.

“No,” he started up suddenly before she could say anything else. “You have nothing to be sorry for. It’s all my fault. I shouldn’t have…”

“Don’t,” she quickly interjected. “Just don’t take all the blame, ok. We both lost our heads.”

Another silence followed before Jessie began again with a question.

“Did you get my message?” she asked.

“No,” he answered a little confused, and then remembered the blinking light on his phone. “Well, yes actually,” he backtracked. “I got it, but I didn’t listen to it. I went for a run right after we hung up to clear my head. Sorry I missed your calls,” he lied. “I decided on my way back that I needed to apologize, so I just called as soon as I got back to my room so that I wouldn’t convince myself not to. You know, I’m not the best at admitting when I’m wrong, but I figured, you know, that I should just get it over with, so I called… and now we’re talking, and I guess…”

Before Jonny could finish what he was saying, soft giggling on the other end of the line interrupted his jumbled train of thought.

She couldn’t help but laugh at is rambling. He always rambles when he’s apologizing, or when he’s trying to avoid talking about what’s really on his mind. Jessie has a sneaky suspicion that both of these things are affecting his ability to speak at the moment.

“Why are you laughing?” he asked a little bit relieved. It was good to hear her laugh.

“You’re rambling and making very little sense,” she told him with a smile in her voice.

“I was simply apologizing,” he defended light-heartedly.

“Oh, is that what that was supposed to be?” she joked.

“Shall I try again?” he questioned dryly.

“That won’t be necessary.” She informed him through a subdued laugh. Once the moment passed, however, their conversation took a more serious tone. “So who gave you the idea that I’m not coming home for Christmas?” she asked.

He paused at her question, slightly thrown by the shift in topic. He knew by the tone in her voice that she wasn’t hanging up without the real answer.

“J,” she prompted at is hesitation.

“I was talking with your mom earlier, and she…”

“Oh my God,” Jessie interrupted loudly. “I can’t believe her. She is totally out of line, and she’s driving me absolutely crazy,” Jessie finished heatedly.

She was breathing heavily at this point, so Jonny decided to give her a few moments to calm down.

Jessie’s seething. She is so mad at her mother right now that she can hardly see straight. Her mom has been pushing her into going out with Jordan for the past three months. Now that she finally has a few times, her mom’s dropping not so subtle hints that a long-term relationship is the way to go. Her mother seems to think that God spent the entire sixth day making Jordan Matthews, and she’s been trying to convince Jessie of that ever since she learned they would both be attending Harvard together.

Her mom started bringing Jordan up over summer break, and hasn’t let up since. She even whipped out pictures of the two of them when they were younger, before her parents were even divorced. Apparently her mother’s best friend’s husband got along really well with her dad. Throw in the fact that both couples had kids only a few years apart and, presto, they all spent a lot of time together. Time that Jessie can’t even remember, but really enjoyed according to her mother. If she has to listen to one more story about how cute she and Jordan were together, she’s gonna scream.

Jessie gets really upset every time her mother starts talking about her and Jordan, and it’s not just for the obvious reason that no one likes their mother butting into their love life. Her mom is constant.y talking about how they were such good friends when they were little, and wouldn’t it be so amazing if they ended up together, and Jessie gets really defensive. She gets so mad because Jordan’s not that guy, Jonny is. Jonny’s the one it would be so amazing to end up with after being friends for so long, and she can’t help but get angry when someone puts Jordan into a position that she’s always thought was Jonny’s. It’s like they’re reducing her relationship with Jonny to less than it really is, or placing the minuscule relationship she had with Jordan above Jonny because it happened first. It doesn’t really take much for her to become defensive about her relationship with Jonny. Only Jonny and herself are allowed an opinion. The input of others is not welcomed. She is so stressed and confused right now.

A small part of her also can’t help but wonder if her mother mentioned Jordan to Jonny on purpose to start trouble. Estella has never come right out and told Jessie that she doesn’t like Jonny, or that she at least wouldn’t approve of him as a boyfriend, but Jessie knows it’s true. On the rare occasion that her mother will be spending time at the Compound, Jessie doesn’t miss the disapproving glances that Jonny gets when he does something that reminds Estella of Race. Her mother thinks Jonny is just like her father, and, therefore, doesn’t really hold him in very high regards. Her mom used to make small comments about it, but stopped once she realized it would do nothing but start a fight. Jessie’s made it no secret to her mother that if she didn’t like Jonny than she better keep it to herself.

Unfortunately, Jessie knows that her mother is not always able to control her emotions, so she doesn’t let Estella spend much time at the Compound anymore. Her mom hasn’t even seen Jonny in over two years. Jessie won’t have her around him if she thinks she’ll make him feel bad. In light of all this, Estella has changed her plan of attack from directly insulting Jonny to just pushing guys on Jessie that she thinks are better. Jordan is not the first, but he is clearly her favorite contendor. Jessie will be having a conversation with her mother very soon.

On the other end of the line, Jonny can’t help but wonder what’s going on in her head. She’s been quiet for awhile, and she’s begun to breathe somewhat erratically.

“You still there, Ace?” he asked cautiously

“Yeah,” she answered quickly, her mind clearly somewhere else.

“Earth to Jess,” he said a little louder to get her attention.

“I’m sorry, I’m still here,” she started. “I’m just…aahhhhh.”

“Ok,” he said. “Just breathe, and then tell me what’s going on with you. What’s happening with your mom?” he asked.

“She’s driving me crazy,” she yelled.

“I got that much,” he told her. “Do you wanna clarify? Why haven’t you mentioned this before?”

“I guess I’ve just been thinking about it so much that I didn’t really feel like talking about it too,” she explained. “Ok,” she started with a sigh. “Jordan is my mom’s best friend’s son, and we apparently spent a lot of time together when we were little.”

“Yeah,” Jonny began in a less than thrilled voice. “Your mom filled me in on all that.”

“What else did she say?” Jessie asked wearily.

Jonny almost said, Everything you should have told me, but held his tongue. He tried to keep his voice steady as he spoke. “Well, she told me all about him, and how you guys have been friends for a while.” He’s trying really hard not to sound jealous or bitter, but isn’t so sure he’s succeeding. “She told me you two had been out a few times, and that she really wanted things to work out. She was hoping I could give her the inside track on things since you tell me more than you tell her.” He could feel himself getting angry again as he continued, but kept his tone fairly steady. “I just told her that’s something she should probably be asking you, and that was about the extent of the conversation,” he finished. It certainly wasn’t the extent of the damage, however.

He waited impatiently as she mulled over what he had just told her.

What he didn’t know is that she wasn’t exactly mulling over his words so much as trying to steady her breathing. Silent tears began to uncontrollably run down her face while he was talking. He’s trying to sound like he’s not upset, but she can hear that he is. It’s all her fault too. She doesn’t trust her voice right now, but she knows he’s gonna get frustrated and start a fight again if she doesn’t start talking soon.

“My mom,” she started in a shaky voice, “has been on my case for a few months now trying to get me to go out with Jordan,” she told him.

“Why,” he asked, not even attempting to hide his annoyance.

Without warning, the floodgates opened up.

“Because she thinks he is the greatest thing in the world. She keeps bringing up all of these stories from when we used to play together, and acts like we are reminiscing or something. I was like four years old, I barely remember him. She keeps telling me how her and Suzanne, that’s Jordan’s mom, always talk about how they wished we had spent more time together growing up. How they always wanted us to get together. My mom has always made it a point to tell me what he’s up to, but once she found out that we would both be at Harvard for the next couple of years, she hasn’t let up about wanting me to go out with him. I saw him around campus a few times the first few months here, but we just pretty much said hello in passing. We never even stopped to have a conversation. My mom told me that Suzanne has been telling Jordan about me too and that he was interested, but he sure didn’t act like it. I figured he was just as annoyed with his mom’s meddling as I was. Anyways, about a month ago, my Mom and Suzanne showed up to ‘surprise’ me and Jordan. It really felt more like an ambush than anything else. They took us out to lunch and started in on us about how we should be taking advantage of spending time together before I could even open my menu. It was so unbelievably embarrassing. He eventually did ask me to dinner and I said ok, but it was all so forced. I thought he was just asking so that our mothers would move on to another topic, but when the time came, he actually showed up at my door. I wasn’t even dressed. I mean I was dressed, but not to go out. I never expected him to show up.”

She took a small breath, but continued before Jonny could say anything.

“So I invited him in and we spent a few hours talking, mostly about the pressure from our mothers, and I eventually realized that he really did want to go out with me the whole time. I think he only waited because my mom told his mom that I wasn’t being very receptive about the whole idea. I think he saw his chance at lunch to ask me and just took it. I don’t really know what to think about him though. I’ve been so confused about the entire situation. And it’s not like he’s just some random guy that I can blow off. He seems like he really likes me a lot, so I keep saying yes when he asks me out. We always have a really good time together, but it’s like he’s too good to be true. He’s interesting to talk to. He’s done all of these amazing things and he’s accomplished so much, but sometimes I feel like I’m just another goal he’s trying to conquer, or like I’m the prize. My mom wants me to marry the guy, but I’m not so sure that he doesn’t just want a trophy wife. Maybe I’m completely wrong, but something just feels off about the whole thing,” she finished with a sigh.

Jonny feels like he’s been punched in the gut. It’s not easy to listen to her say good things about this guy, even though it’s clear that she’s not 100 sure about him. Hearing the word ‘marry’ come out of her mouth while referreing to Jordan threw him for a loop, as well. He has about hundred questions going through his mind that he wants to ask, but he asks the obvious one instead. “What do you think is off about it?”

“I don’t know,” she started, even though she really did know. “Maybe it’s all the pressure and expectations,” she lied. “I mean my mother has been on cloud nine for the last month. I feel like not at least giving him a chance would really disappoint her. I know that I shouldn’t feel that way. She should really have no say in who I date, but I just hate disappointing her, especially when I hardly get to spend any time with her,” Jessie finished honestly.

“I know you do,” Jonny sympathized.

“I’m just digging myself in deeper too,” she continued. “The longer I keep going out with him, the more serious my mom’s gonna think things are, but I don’t think I’m ready to break it off yet either.” And she really wasn’t. She’s been trying to get over Jonny for months, and this is the first guy she’s been able to get past the first date with. Maybe he’s the one to help her move on.

“It’s not fair to anyone to keep this up if you don’t really feel it,” she heard him break into her thoughts.

“I know,” she agreed. “The problem is that I’m not sure how I feel.” The truth is that she knows exactly how she feels. She loves Jonny, but wishes that she didn’t and she doesn’t love Jordan, but wishes that she at least could. She knows that Jordan likes her a whole hell of a lot more than she likes him and, even though she can’t understand how someone can like her so much in such a period of time, she knows it’s not fair to lead him on.

At this point, Jonny just wishes she would give him a straight answer, whether it’s one he wants to hear or not. He’s so relieved that she doesn’t seem to like this guy as much as he let his imagination believe she could, but he was still hoping to hear her say that she didn’t like him at all. It seems like she could go either way right now. The predicament that Jonny has is how he should proceed. Should he fight for what he wants, and try to persuade her he’s not the right guy, or should he let her make her own decision and then take things from there. It’s not an easy choice for him to make, and it’s even less easy to make quickly. In the moment he decides that it has to be up to her. He doesn’t want her unless he can have all of her. Anything less would be too painful.

“What does your heart tell you,” he asked her barely above a whisper, waiting with baited breath for her to reply.

His question stopped the quick pace that her mind was running at in its tracks. It wants you is what she immediately thinks, but pauses before speaking.

“And don’t say I don’t know,” he quickly added before she could say it. “Just think about it. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but you need to figure it out. The sooner you do, the quicker you can set things the way they should be and stop being so stressed out,” he told her.

He sounded so sincere. She wanted to pour all her real feelings out to him, but she stepped back and took and deep breath before answering.

“I want,” she started, but then stopped.

“You can trust me. You can tell me anything. I’ll help you if I can,” he told her.

“I know,” she smiled. I love you, she thought.

“I want to be happy,” she said honestly.

“Does he make you happy,” he asked strained.

“He doesn’t make me sad,” she said.

“That’s not good enough,” he told her.

“I know,” she replied. “I think he’s a good guy, but it’s just that…”

“Just what?” he prompted, eager to hear what she had to say.

“He’s moving too fast,” she confided. “That’s a big part of what’s making it feel off for me.”

“What do you mean too fast,” he asked, automatically in defense mode. “He’s not pressuring you at all is he? I’ll…”

“No, Jonny not like that,” she interrupted his tirade. “I meant relationship wise. He’s already asked me to spend Christmas break and the summer with him. We’ve only been on three dates. Doesn’t that seem a little fast to you?” she asked.

“Absolutely,” he quickly affirmed.

“Are you thinking about going?” he asked.

“No, not really,” she told him, and she couldn’t help but notice his sigh of relief. “I mean he’s everything that my mom says, for the most part, but he’s not who I want,” she said. It was the most honest thing she had said all night, but she still couldn’t believe she let it slip out of her mouth

“Who…What do you want,” he corrected himself. She couldn’t help but notice his slip of tongue, and the way he had said it.

She almost told him the whole truth, but was too afraid.

“I want to come home,” she confessed. “I miss my family, and Questworld, and even Bandit,” she laughed. “And I really miss you.”

“I miss you too,” he smiled. “So you’ll be home in a few weeks then,” he asked happily.

“If finals don’t kill me,” she quipped.

“I’m sure you’ll survive,” he told her.

‘Thanks for the sympathy, J.”

“Anytime, Jess.”

“So what are you gonna do about Jordan?” he asked.

“I’m not sure yet,” she honestly answered.

It’s not exactly what he wanted to hear, and he still doesn’t know where he stands with her, but he definitely feels better about things now than he did a few hours ago.

“I’m glad I called,” he told her quietly.

“Me too,” she said.

“Call me tomorrow?” he said.

“Well, only five or six times,” she said. “I have to study.”

“Of course,” he agreed. “The last ting I would want to do is interrupt your scholastic efforts.”

“So, what did you get me for Christmas?” she asked out of the blue.

“Something I’m hoping you’ll cherish forever,” he said before he could think about it.

Before tonight, he had been planning on giving her the locket over Christmas. He had been planning yet again on how he was gonna tell her he loved her, but tonight had thrown him for a loop. He shouldn’t have said that because now she’s gonna expect something special. If he chicken’s out, and gives her something stupid, she’s gonna know that something’s up.

Something in his voice made her heart stop when he told he that, but she’s trying not to analyze it too much though because she doesn’t want to set herself up for disappointment. “Now I’m really intrigued,” she said.

“Well you’re just gonna have to wait,” he said light-heartedly, trying to cover his nervousness.

“Tease,” she accused.

“Hey, hey, hey,” he said. “There’s no reason for name calling.”

She giggled quietly on the other end of the phone, and he knew they were alright.

“Night Jess,” he said softly.

“Night,” she said. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Bye”

“Bye”

“I love you,” he said after she had hung up. He knew she couldn’t hear him, but it felt good to say it out loud.
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Love is Strong