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Fuck Pig	By : ladylaguna Category: +G through L > Invader Zim > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 4696 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Invader Zim, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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As Nirvana came into view, Dib found himself succumbing to nervousness. Always had his family felt like strangers to him, but now, after such a long absence...

He wasn't sure what to say when he hailed them, asking for clearance to land.

"Please state your name and purpose."

Finally, he simply decided on the truth. They only had an audio linkup. Their technology was still primitive compared to the rest of the universe... "I am Dib Membrane. And... I'm coming home."

The ship landed and he took a deep breath as he put Megami on his hip. As the outer doors opened, she blinked against the bright red sun and clung tightly to him, completely silent. Scientists, many he remembered from Earth, were gathered.

"My God-- It really is him!"

"Impossible!"

Dib smiled a little, feeling awkward. They thronged about him, observing, eyeing his prosthetic and his baby. Membrane arrived first, parting his collegues like the Red Sea in order to lay eyes on his son for the first time in two years.

Both men were speechless.

Finally, Membrane closed the distance between them, laying a gentle hand upon Dib's back and guiding him away from the landing pad. "Let us repair to an area with more privacy, shall we?" They walked into the ship station, occupying a small office. Megami stared at her grandfather in frightened fascination.

"And... who is this?" Membrane finally asked gently, ever-interested in children.

Blushing deeply, Dib replied, "This... is my daughter..."

A quiet knock issued from the door and Valerie peeked in. When she saw Dib, the breath caught in her throat. "I... I don't believe it--!!" She instantly fell against him, wrapping her arms around both him and the baby. Sobbing, she buried her head in his neck. "I thought you were dead-- I saw the video-- I-- I--"

"Val--" He curled his awkward prosthetic about her waist, smiling sadly.

Gaz entered the room seconds later. Much like their father, she couldn't find words, only staring slack-jawed at him. Membrane gestured towards a circle of chairs about a small oaken table and they all sat, Valerie barely able to keep her composure.

"...how?" Gaz was able to murmer after they were all situated.

Smiling, Dib recounted his reawakening, at the hands of the Meekrob and why they did it... "They... seem to view me as some sort of hero," Dib chuckled, scratching the side of his head. "I don't know why..."

"If it weren't for you, the Tallests would have turned Zim into chud," Gaz growled, fist clenched.

So odd for her to actually sing Dib's praise... "I suppose... you're right. But I only did... what I felt I had to do... I figured my life was over anyway." He gestured with his bad arm.

Membrane didn't seem terribly keen on continuing the discussion about how his son had died. "...your daughter, you say?" he asked, pointing at the curious little creature in Dib's lap. She still continued to stare at the older man, wide-eyed.

"Yes..." Dib felt awkward. "Um..."

"So all this time we thought you were dead, you were out getting alien poontang, huh?"

Laughing in shock, Dib cried, "No!" He grinned at his sister. "Megami was inside me... Before I died, I think. When the Meekrob revived me, they had to cut her out." They all looked incredulously at him. HE was the mother?? "She's... half Irken, they say."

Jaws dropped. That could only really mean one thing... "So... Zim impregnated you?" Valerie leaned forward. "...after all those questions he asked about human reproduction... I just figured he was curious about US."

"I guess so." Dib didn't really feel like talking about Zim any longer, which was compounded by the death look that Gaz gave Valerie. She obviously didn't know about their little 'repopulation' plan...

* * * * * *

"...yeah. Gaz and I... I guess you could say we're a couple." Valerie shrugged. "It's hard to read her sometimes."

"I thought as much." Dib laughed, but couldn't help but feel a little jealousy. They walked along the edge of day and night, following behind Megami as she played in the grass. Plucking something akin to a flower, she toddled back to Valerie and deposited it (with a handfull of dirt) into her palm.

"Why, thank you!" Val squealed, smiling at her as she accepted it. As Megami nodded in satisfaction and went back to work, Valerie glanced up at Dib. "She's so adorable. Her features are so... odd, though. It's hard to see exactly how the human and Irken genes mixed..."

"Who knows?" Dib said, shrugging himself. "I don't know what exactly Zim did... perhaps he had to mix a little bit of me into the whole mess to make sure my body didn't reject her? He's only a brilliant scientist half the time; I'm sure she didn't turn out exactly as he planned. She might even deteriorate as she grows, or be sterile... God only knows..."

Valerie played with her shirt as the walked. "Do you... really think he just wanted your body to carry a host? I mean... it just doesn't seem like..."

"He's a manipulator. He always has been..." Shaking his head, Dib looked away. "Can we stop discussing this now?"

From a few hundred feet away, Gaz was seen approaching them. She had finally finished her work for the day, and though she would usually go back home and relax, it was possible she was coming to check on Dib and Valerie's activities instead...

Megami tripped on a rock and tumbled on over with a scream. The adults ran to her as she sat up, bawling... She had skinned her knee.

"Oh, it's just a scratch," Gaz insisted as she helped the little thing onto her feet, dusting her off. Dib covered her face in kisses, cooing. "She's never had a boo-boo like this before," Dib stated, studying her bleeding knee closely as she whined.

"You need to be careful when you tend to it. I doubt you'll be able to just wash it off like you would with any other child..." Valerie pulled the toddler into her arms. "I probably know more about the Irken anatomy than you do, Dib. I'll go get her fixed up." Without any further discussion, she took the crying child away, leaving Dib and Gaz alone.

They stood in an awkward silence as they watched her go. "She'd be a good mother," Dib stated quietly.

"You wanted to have kids with her?" Gaz asked, tossing a glance to the side.

Scratching his chin, Dib sighed, "Well, I thought we were the only humans left alive. SOMEONE neglected to inform me of the fact that dad and his collegues were hiding out on some planet in the middle of nowhere..."

Gaz spat, "Don't give me that bullshit, Dib. You know why I did it. I didn't want Zim anywhere near this place... and I was right to do so, wasn't I? Look what ended up happening to you."

After looking at the ground for a moment, Dib sighed. If he hadn't stayed with Zim, though... Megami probably wouldn't exist now. Very difficult, very surreal, to think of it in those terms... Difficult to think that a simple change in plan could have resulted in...

"Do you still not regret the decision?" Gaz asked incredulously as she narrowed her eyes at him.

"To be honest... no. What's the fucking point of regret?" Dib looked up at her, eyes shining oddly as he smiled. "Do you want me to say that you were right about him? Okay. 'You were right.'"

"So, what are you going to do now?" Gaz asked him simply, not bothering to acknowledge his admission. It seemed she knew that he wasn't going to stay.

He sensed that she knew, and felt awkward. "Well... I would like to hunt him down, to hold him accountable for what he's done. Is that wrong of me?"

"Nah. I'd do it too."

"But I'm being pursued. And I would prefer if my daughter were not in danger."

Pursing her lips, Gaz looked up at the sky. "So you want us to keep an eye on her? I'm sure Valerie would be thrilled to do it. But... dad..."

"I know, he's not thrilled about my Irken lovechild."

"I think that I can convince him. Her anatomy alone would be a fascinating study," Gaz replied, putting her hands behind her back. "I'm hungry. Let's go home and make dinner."

Nodding, Dib followed her back to their place.

* * * * * * * * * *

Dib felt that stalling was only going to make the “goodbye” worse... So he left early the next morning, after Valerie agreed to watch Megami for him. Though she wasn't thrilled with the idea of his going to “get accountability” from Zim, she knew that he was too stubborn to try and persuade. With one last, loving look at his daughter and a promise that he would radio home daily, Dib went back to his ship.

“I'll be back before you know it. Don't worry,” Dib reassured the girls. They waved, both appearing rather unimpressed, before he shut the door and took off.

He was back with Tak in a matter of days. Dumping his old ship, knowing the pursuers would recognize it, he joined Tak on her own.

“So, what shall we do?” he asked her as they lounged, nude, on her bed. She was incredibly studious, their mussed covers already causing her discomfort. She pushed him off and made the bed before perching carefully atop it again. When she signaled, he rejoined her and she curled idly against him. “Hmmmm. Look for sightings of Irkens.”

“But that could include the Tallest Host and his crew, couldn't it? If we run into them again...”

“We'll kill them all and then go get some dinner at a nice restaurant.”

Dib laughed a little, pushing his hair back off of his forehead. “I'm glad that you're so calm about this.”

Turned out that ANY Irken unfortunate enough to cross their paths was killed. Heads were turned into Federation outposts for a great deal of money, and Tak earned herself immunity by bringing in her own species. Soon she was being referred to as the “Cannibal Daughter of Irk.”

“Why turn on your own race?” Dib had asked her once.

Shrugging, Tak said, “They'd do the same if it earned them a meal ticket. It's just the nature of who we are...”

“After your condemning Zim for using others...”

The conversation ended when Tak began to unbutton his pants. She always knew how to shut him up.

During Dib's absence, Megami adjusted well to her new home. Taking to Valerie almost instantly, and even having an affection for Gaz (much to her surprise), Megami soon didn't miss her father at all. Though she got to see him every day on the vidscreen. His family wasn't informed about his relationship with Tak, and Tak didn't mind one bit. It was an unspoken agreement that they were only together by circumstance; if one wanted to up and leave at any time, the other wouldn't question it. But both enjoyed eachother and despite having some fundamental differences, got along rather well.

And, of course, they didn't want to be alone.

After about another six months had passed, they ran into Dib's old friends while following another lead from the Federation. The two of them actually came upon the boy first; he was sitting on a rock, soaking up some sunlight while poking at a small vidscreen. Their ship was more than a mile away and no other Irkens could be seen. The planet was largely uninhabited; his caretakers probably didn't consider it dangerous to let him out on his own for awhile, especially considering how stubborn Dib remembered him to be before.

“That's him,” Dib said quietly, pointing.

Tak nodded. “Yes, I'd recognize that Pak anywhere... It's the Tallest Host. He looks just like Red and Purple did at that age.”

Feeling pity, knowing what sort of fate he had been brought into existence for... Dib said, “We don't have to kill him, do we? He's just a kid. Let's just subdue him, huh?”

“And then what?” Tak asked him, lips pursed. “Are you going to raise him yourself? Does Megami need a big brother?”

He didn't have time to consider the answer, because the boy's antlers perked and he whirled about. Dib held up his hands to show that he wasn't a threat. Tak, of course, did nothing. When the boy simply stared, Dib began to take a few cautious steps towards him. When they were about ten feet away, Dib called, “...Vermeil? How ya doin', Champ? Just comin' to visit with you and your traveling companions.”

The boy's eyes narrowed. “You can't fool me again. I know who you are now. I've seen the video.”

Dib looked into the boy's eyes and felt... pity, rather than panic. There was something dark, something dead within them now. They had broken him. What was he to do now?

They had shown him the video...?

Of his parents being murdered. Yeah. What jerks.

“Dib--” Tak breathed in warning, finally making her own decision and advancing on the boy. However, he had already begun pressing a series of keys on his console. As her Paklegs emerged, he scrambled backward off of the rock and began to run.

Reaching out his good arm, Dib screamed, “Wait! Champ--!!”

There was a blur on the grass and suddenly the Alpha male was upon them both, dagger raised and arm rising to rip Tak's legs from her. She fell back unharmed and snarled, “Tzin. What a surprise. Imperial dog to the very end.”

“Oh, so you know this asshole?” Dib cried.

“We failed our Invader exams together,” Tzin laughed, teeth glistening. “I went back to Elitedom, but Tak failed so fantastically that she was assigned to janitorial duty.”

Tossing her head, Tak hissed, “You can't try and shame me in front of Dib. He knows that it was Zim's fault that I failed. You were just a fucking idiot.” Pulling her pistol, she let off a few shots that he easily dodged. “Still are.” He dodged right into a pakleg, grunting as he was sliced through the shoulder.

Dib moved to help but Tak held up a hand. “This is about pride for me, Dib. I can handle this prick.”

Soon, the boy was out of sight, probably heading back to hide on the ship. His female caretaker was probably there, and would soon be coming to help deal with the situation... and there was a third Irken... Were there more? That was probably it. They could handle them all if they took this guy out early. Ignoring Tak, Dib advanced.

“Dammit, Dib!”

She wasn't used to fighting with others and really, neither was Dib. They had trouble coordinating blows so that they didn't hit eachother instead of Tzin... Finally, the Elite landed a good hit against Dib's jaw, having managed to catch him at a moment when he hadn't brought his powers to the surface. Crying out and falling on his back, he scooted away from the scene to recover. It had been broken... He reset it, allowing the Meekrob to heal the injury as he watched. Tak and Tzin tangled more viciously together then, daggers and paklegs and gunshots and Irken curses flying with abandon.

Tak was wearing him down... He was larger and heartier than she, but the female was more skilled and smarter. Dib moved to stand and grab another opening... but suddenly, he felt a horrific burning sensation at the back of his neck. He moved to reach back and deal with it, but as his prosthetic moved he felt his powers and muscles giving away... the fake appendage flew off, skittering over the grass out of his reach.

Trying to turn, Dib let out a pained growl as he felt every muscle in his body complain. His chest was suddenly searing. Looking down, he saw that his shirt was soaked with blood. “Wha---”

A sharp blow to his temple sent him reeling to the ground on his side. Through the haze of intense pain he managed to roll onto his back, looking up. The female was looming over him, another chunk of yellow rock in hand. “Fancy powers ain't so much now, eh human?” Stepping roughly on his neck, she curled to begin beating him in the face with it much like they had done to that poor Meekrob he had seen before... His hand raised to pull her boot away, but his fingers ached as they curled around her ankle; he didn't have the strength to do anything.

Except let out a strangled cry, which is what he did.

Tak's concentration faltered for just a moment as she glanced in his direction, and that was all that Tzin needed. One well-placed pakleg pierced her neck and blood splattered across the ground. Dib could only watch in horror as Tak reached up to pull at the metallic appendage helplessly, her own paklegs flailing for purchase and failing. Cackling, Tzin lifted her into the air. The female Irken left Dib in his agony, moving behind Tak and ripping the metallic legs from her body. She screamed, choking on blood as the female discarded the legs and reached up again, this time ripping the Pak away with a sickening squelching sound.

“Now, watch.” Watering purple eyes were directed to look at the small metallic orb, her tenuous hold on life, as the female laughed and chucked it into the tall grass, completely out of view. “You always thought you were hot shit, Tak. Now what exactly are you? A traitor and a failure. And you'll die alone.”

Tzin dropped Tak into the dirt and Dib howled, rolling on his stomach to try and help her. But the female was soon atop him again, grabbing his hair with a fist and jerking his face up toward hers. “My name is Tenn, you waste of life,” she spat, teeth bared at him. “You will learn to loathe this name.”

The third Irken had arrived at some point, because Dib felt his hands on his body, claws digging in without mercy. His clothes were torn away, new wounds created and old wounds aggravated. Something about that rock obviously nullified Meekrob powers; all of his old injuries were new again as if they'd never been healed. Dib looked back, shoulder grinding against the dirt as Tenn let him fall again. Soon, he realized what exactly was about to occur.

“So, you like Irken cock?”

Dib let out an anguished sob as his body was invaded rudely and with even less consideration than the claws had taken. Flesh was torn, the burning and bruising of sensitive muscle unlike anything he'd ever felt before. Tears began to stream down his face as he spiraled into the pain, eyes soon largely unseeing.

At some point he realized that Tenn was holding Tak's head, forcing her to watch. Her eyes were squeezed shut. She just couldn't do it.... Tzin was nowhere to be found—at first... But soon Dib felt the Irken's strong hands digging into his jaw, jerking his limp body upward. As he was assaulted from behind, Tzin pried his mouth open with the help of a pakleg. “This'll be the best fucking thing you'll ever taste,” he growled as he shoved his large member past Dib's lips. He couldn't bite down due to the pakleg... he couldn't fight back... he was was just too damn weak. Choking, he attempted to clear his tongue out of the way, to somehow avoid suffocation, but it seemed to only goad Tzin onward. “Oh, you do like it, you fucking slut. Look how he's moving his mouth.”

“So damn hot and tight,” the other Irken sneered. “No wonder Zim liked it so much.”

Dib was finally overwhelmed. He vomited violently, the liquid burning Tzin's skin and forcing him to withdraw. When the contents of his stomach, along with any blood and saliva he'd swallowed, was finally free of his body, the sweet embrace of unconsciousness finally claimed him.

******************************************************************
REVIEW REPLIES.

FoxDragon: I'm glad you enjoy my work even without Karisness X3 I know I'm not the best writer in the world but I hope that at least my "passion" for it shows through... I say "passion" because it's still a hobby... but a very virilent one. XDD

I am very pleased by your speculation, very pleased indeed... *Mr. Burns hands* I love seeing what people garner from the characters. We'll just have to wait and see~

Krimzon: Haha, I know that most of the ZADR fans out there are so mad that I am delaying their satisfaction. But THE STORY MUST BE TOLD ZOMG. >_> I am trying to satisfy everyone and not alienate anyone. I probably already have but I suppose the people that only care about the pairing are... not the people I really care about having around?

Keri: Yaaaaaaaay Invaderwolf XDD I apologize because Tak is one of my faves XDD I actually think I like her more than Zim. She's just... so awesome. so... so awesome. But out of consideration for you there was no graphic DATR in this chap. :D;;

Rin: Thank you so much! I really appreciate hearing you say that. I can't and don't plan to adapt this to an original setting, I do have other original works lying around. I have a webcomic I haven't updated in ages that is actually where Megami came from XD

Switch: You're so very welcome :3 I'm so glad you enjoy my work, and I'm glad that you didn't have to sit around for an eternity waiting for my updates ;3 I really enjoy creating more complicated BS inside universes I'm a fan of... It's just fun for me to add onto concepts and/or twist them around to make them work for me.

xpennamex: Hey, look. I updated. XD Hopefully the next updates will be a little more quick; I had trouble with this chapter due to some scenes in it. (surprisingly, not the scenes you'd think XD) I'm glad you like how I'm developing Dib's character. There's still a lot of changes in his future :x

feather: Hehe, yeah, I was trying to illustrate in the cutscene at the end of the last chap that their reading of events wasn't exactly our reading of them-- or rather, Dib's own recollections. Megami's reading Dib's memoirs but they're not quite so graphic as he personally remembers them.
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