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The Ladies of Steven's Universe	By : ShadowProc213 Category: +S through Z > Steven Universe Views: 61659 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Steven Universe or any associated characters or properties. I do not make any money from this story and no negotiable goods have been exchanged.

Chapter List
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Lapis Lazuli was sitting down with Connie, "You said a word that I don't understand. Addiction. Could you elaborate?"
Connie held up a chocolate chip cookie. "See this?"
"Yes. I definitely see it." Lapis assured her.
"Humans enjoy it because it's sweet, and gooey, and--"
"Like Steven?" Lapis interrupted. This was met with a slap from Connie's empty hand, actually leaving a bruise. "Why did you hit me so hard?"
"Do you want to get over this magically amplified crush on Steven or not?" Connie demanded.
"Yes..." Lapis sighed, sounding defeated.
"Well then, you can't assume that every positive thing in the universe is Steven. You spent all of last night staring at the sky. When asked, you told me that the moon and stars were Steven!" Connie yelled.
"Well, how did you keep from falling into it like everyone else?" Lapis asked.
"I've never slept with Steven." Connie explained.
"But, Garnet and Jasper have both talked about 'that night with us and Steven and Connie'. Didn't you have sex with Steven then?" Lapis begged, trying to get any amount of permission from her pseudo-counselor.
"I didn't have sex with Steven, we had sex together." Connie tried.
"Huh?" Lapis responded, mouth agape.
"We were fused together, as Stevonnie. Both Jasper and Garnet wanted to give it a try." Connie explained.
"Sadie said that being a girl and boy fused together doesn't work right." Lapis pointed out.
"Not for Steven and Sadie, but it works just fine for he and I." Connie explained. "A little appreciated psychological disorder among humans lets me dive deep into the conceptual body created by Stevonnie. One that is completely male."
"You don't just redefine a body to suit your needs when you're generating a new one?" Lapis asked.
"Not really. When Steven and I are Stevonnie, we're a boy. I like being a boy. I also enjoy fucking the other gems, and Sadie, but not Steven." Connie explained, biting into the cookie.
"So... you're a non-shapeshifter, who enjoys being changed into the wrong gender?" Lapis asked.
"Little bit." Connie admitted. "Once I get out of school, Steven and I were actually talking about some kind of rotating calendar for who's sleeping with who, and when."
"That sounds like a fun project, actually." Lapis admitted, rubbing where Connie had slapped her before.
"Does your face still sting from where I slapped you?" Connie asked.
"Yes..." Lapis pouted.
"Are you going to rely on Steven to fix it?" Connie asked further.
"I guess I shouldn't." Lapis looked up at her.
"There's your first step." Connie declared. "Have a cookie." She offered a fresh chocolate chip cookie to the blue woman. "This has been plenty of progress. Now Steven and I have a date with Sadie!"
"Can I join you?" Lapis begged.
"Nope." Connie said before rushing out the door.
Lapis got up to try and follow her to coax more out of her, but stopped in the living room when she saw Amethyst in front of the fridge, and thought of a new plan.
"Oh, Amethyst, you want to transform into Steven and..." she stuttered and grabbed the random novelty subway sandwich sleeping bag before continuing. "Use his bed?" Lapis asked the striped violet woman, fluttering her eyes.
Amethyst closed the fridge, revealing Jasper behind the door, then elbowed her in the ribs. "I told you one little moment with Steven wouldn't come between us."
Amethyst then walked off to her room with Lapis following close behind. Waiting until the purple gem and blue gem were both gone from the room, Peridot who was in the hall, looked to Jasper. "Why did she say that?"
"Not sure." Jasper shrugged. "Why isn't your little green mouth licking some part of me?" the bulky orange woman smiled.
Peridot paused, then smiled up at her companion. "Considering the parameters, namely that the only other people in the house are going to be very distracted for a protracted length of time, that is an excellent question." Peridot agreed, reaching up to Jasper's shoulder and pulling on the strap, dragging her green finger along the orange flesh. She'd only been without those limb enhancers for a short while in the grand scheme of things, so getting to really feel someone was still new to her.
Jasper was far stronger, and liked to display it. She picked up her little friend, letting the diminutive green gem sit on Jasper's well-muscled orange forearm as Peridot's hands rested on Jasper's huge shoulders. Peridot pulled on the other strap as well, and watched as the top half of Jasper's uniform fell away. It slipped down off that robust orange chest to reveal a pair of burgeoning breasts before it disappeared along with the lower half of the uniform.
"Have you noticed that, ever since we got captured, taking our clothes off has become far more interesting?" Peridot teased, placing a kiss on Jasper's forehead.
"That's because it's not just for inspection." Jasper agreed in her gritty voice. She lowered Peridot down just far enough to kiss her on the mouth, sliding both of their tongues together. "You're overdressed." She ordered, and Peridot willed her outfit to vanish. Pressing her smaller avocado self against this tangerine titan, Peridot licked her crooked lips as Jasper wrapped a huge hand around Peridot's lanky thigh. She prodded with her fingertips at Peridot's recently-formed labial lips. "I don't remember you having this little accessory the last time I inspected you."
"That's a Steven-only opening... so far." Peridot leaned her forehead to just barely touch Jasper's own forehead. "Wanna be the first girl in my pussy?"
Jasper curled the tips of her fingers to slip inside of Peridot, drawing a husky sigh out of the green woman. The fingers were meaty enough to press on Peridot's insides, and Jasper twisted them around until her friend started squealing. "Is this the first time I've gotten you to scream that loud?"
"Not the first time, but definitely the first time I've wanted more." Peridot begged.
While the two of them continued their open tryst, Connie had arrived at Sadie's pickup truck behind the Big Doughnut. She wasn't living there, but she did enjoy having a place away from her mother's house. Steven and Sadie were both standing beside the old wreck of a vehicle, and Connie ran right up to them. "Sorry I'm late. Lapis wanted help getting over her Steven addiction." Connie explained, planting a kiss on Steven's cheek.
"Wow. Why so affectionate?" Steven asked, looking down at her.
"That kiss wasn't really for you." Connie winked at Sadie, punching Steven in the arm. Despite her putting extra force behind the punch, it didn't hurt Steven. In fact, as Steven's soft exterior absorbed the punch, it also absorbed Connie entirely. There was a brilliant glow, and the two of them were replaced by a far more lithe and muscular version of Steven. This new being had hair down to its thighs, an extra-tight tanktop shirt filled with an ample bosom, and a pair of hotpants that had a huge bulge in them. Out of those incredibly short pants were dangling a pair of very long and sinewy legs, and the eyes fell just into the magenta end of the spectrum.
"Hi, we're Stevonnie, and we've got something in our pants for you." He introduced himself, giving a little bow to the blond girl. Their voices came out as one, leaving a dissonance between Connie's higher pitch and Steven's lower speaking register.
Sadie blushed up at Stevonnie. "Okay, you're incredibly hot, but if you talk like that again, I swear I'm gonna pee my pants. That voice is terrifying, and it's coming out of a person who is at least ten feet tall." She reminded them, backing up until she ran into the open tailgate of the truck.
"Sorry. We're pretty good at fusing, but it's never perfect right at the start." Stevonnie explained, then put his hand to the ground, making a circle of grass spring up all over this parking lot. "I don't think we'll fit in the truck." He added, then gently took Sadie's hand, first kissing it, then sliding fingers into the sleeve of Sadie's shirt, pulling that off of her and tossing it in the truck.
"Okay, I think I can deal with the fifteen foot tall fusion, but why do you keep saying 'we'?" Sadie asked, stepping out of her pants, tossing them next to her shirt.
"Because true fusion comes from love." Stevonnie answered. He put his hands on Sadie's shoulders, and gently pushed the meaty girl onto her back. "Steven and Connie are friends, and not lovers. Since they're cheating at fusion, their union can't make a whole new gem. But..." Stevonnie knelt down to slip Sadie's panties down her abundant thighs, revealing the dripping lips of Sadie's luscious pussy. "So long as Steven and Connie are both agreeing about something, like how delicious you look..." Stevonnie stuck out a tongue that may well have been stolen from a giraffe, and that sloppy pink tendril tasted along the full length of Sadie's torso.
It dragged along the bud of her clitoris, and slithered up Sadie's love handles, wrapping coyly underneath the bra and around a breast before sliding into Sadie's mouth. Sadie was a strong woman, but felt powerless between the combination of Steven's literally cosmic powers and the ingenious ways that Connie was using them. She didn't feel helpless, but did know that she'd never gotten her own body to feel this way. Probably due to a previous lack of polymorphic alien magic. Her eyes rolled back into her head, and she started reflexively sucking this thing in her mouth. The grass beneath her back was cold, and this magical tongue was so warm. Sadie dug her fingers into the grass and moaned with delight, her bare fingertips clawing up the dirt beneath.
Sadie put her heel's on Stevonnie's shoulders, then bucked her hips toward Stevonnie's face, and he let it hit him. The squishing noise as Sadie slammed her crotch into this giant's face was loud enough to echo. It worried the smarter part of Stevonnie, since Sadie wasn't usually that strong. Luckily, the smarter part wasn't in charge right now. The bulge in Stevonnie's pants had control, and it made him grind his face into Sadie's sopping mound. Drawing in a deep bouquet as he rubbed his nose into her clit, the tongue still wrapped generously around most of Sadie's body.
Another wave of heated pleasure rocked every inch of Sadie's body, and she lost the grip she'd been keeping with her legs. The bottom half of her fell, but Stevonnie caught her by the flesh of her ass. Stevonnie smiled down at Sadie, his tongue still sticking out. Sadie sat up some of the way as Stevonnie retracted his tongue the whole way back in. Trying to smile wider, Stevonnie forced his mouth to unzip from ear to ear, showing off those happy teeth.
"Holy doughnuts!" Sadie yelled. "How are you even making your mouth do that?"
"We can reshape our bodies into whatever we want." Stevonnie reminded her gently, and the gaping maw mostly resealed itself. "So, was the mouth too much?"
"I'm... adapting." Sadie answered. "I like what you did with your tongue a lot better than what you did with your mouth. The tongue actually felt good, it wasn't just creepy."
"Sorry about that." Stevonnie offered, kneeling in close to Sadie. Hugging her, bringing her in tight. "You know we don't mean to scare you. We love--"
Steven was still there, kneeling right on the freshly grown grass, still hugging a nude Sadie. He was glowing for a moment, but only long enough for Connie to be ejected from his luminescent torso. She landed on the grass as well, on her hands and knees, then turned around to look at her two friends.
"Special note: emotional dysphoria can cause just as much dissonance in a fusion as gender dysphoria." Connie said aloud.
"Wait, what?" Steven asked. "What's not to love about Sadie?"
"I don't think you're quite getting the point, Steven." Connie slowed it down. "You love Sadie a lot more than I do, and that keeps us from forming Stevonnie for a protracted period of time."
"More?" Sadie asked, standing up.
"Maybe not 'more'." Connie corrected herself, walking around the both of them. "But I don't really know Sadie nearly as well as you do." She tossed the chubby girl her clothes from the truck.
"How do you plan on fixing that?" Sadie asked.
"Simplest thing in the world. We're going to spend the day together. It'll be a girls' day out." Connie announced, hands on her hips, striking a triumphant pose.
"That sounds like so much fun! The three of us can-" Steven's enthusiasm was waylaid by Connie putting a hand over his mouth.
"Steven, you know I care about you. But as your best friend, I have to ask you for a favor. Please don't ruin my chance to..." She leaned in and whispered the last part. "... My chance to fall in love with our favorite human being. Let us fall in love. Let us be alone together."
"I'll leave you both to it, I guess." Steven agreed. "If you need me, I've got my phone." He said as he walked away, straightening up his clothes as he went. Connie was being blunt because she'd seen Steven playing matchmaker before. Much of the time, both people ended up in tears, and one of them ended up injured. No need to test luck now.
"What exactly are you planning on doing?" Sadie asked Connie.
"No idea. I've never been on a date before." Connie smirked at her.
"I could still use some of Steven's... you know what." Sadie pouted a little, looking up at Connie.
"You can get that later. For now, it's you-and-me time!" Connie took Sadie's hand, and the both of them ran off in the opposite direction from Steven.
"Well, that seems kind of harsh." Pearl commented as Steven walked past her.
"You get to watch me as much as you want. You should really ask permission to eavesdrop on everyone else." Steven turned to look at her.
Pearl recoiled somewhat. "If I did that, it wouldn't be eavesdropping. Also, you're not the least bit mad at Connie for blaming the failed fusion on you?"
"She doesn't blame me, Pearl. She blames herself." Steven explained. "The big risk of listening to someone else's conversation: you can't always hear the whole thing." He chided.
"So what did she whisper to you?" Pearl raised an eyebrow.
"Something private." He explained, only to get a confused look from Pearl. "Don't look at me like that. Her love is her business, and as her wingman, I'm ready to keep that secret."
"Fine. Whatever that means, it doesn't matter. I found this in Peridot's work area." Pearl held up a piece of paper with a few dozen names on one side. Next to each name was a dot of color from a crayon. On the opposite side of the paper, there were dozens of dots. Each set was blocked off into a separate color combination. Some of them were even five or six dots together. "I need you to 'do your thing', and get Peridot to tell us what this masterful encryption means."
"It's a pairing chart." Steven told her.
"Pairing what-now?" Pearl demanded, eyes actually going cross-eyed for a second as she said it.
"She likes to calculate tactical potential for different groups." Steven explained, pointing to one of the sets of dots. "See this one? That's beige, purple, red, and blue. Get it?"
"It's Alexandrite." Pearl gasped. "This is like coded combat statistics. If this fell into the wrong hands--" Steven took the page from her.
"You see me holding this chart? It's now in the most powerful hands in the galaxy." Steven smiled big at her. Looking for a moment at the paper, he poked one of the sets of dots. "This one is beige and gray."
"So? What's so special about gray?" Pearl demanded.
"Gray is the color she's using for my Dad." Steven answered, only to be met with stunned silence.
"What are you implying?" Pearl stumbled. "What does Greg have to do with anything?"
"Pearl, you need to relax." Steven just about ordered. "I'm not implying anything. Peridot made the chart, and who knows what it means." Steven tried to verbally maneuver. "It could be anything from a romantic pairing, to a team of musicians who use instruments as weapons, to the two of you running an auto body shop together."
"Well then, I'm gonna go prove her wrong on all fronts." Pearl declared, grabbing the paper and running off.
"Let's see... if things go well by my standards, then Dad's gonna get laid. Don't wanna be there for that." Steven thought aloud, walking back toward the sandy beach. "And if things go well by Pearl's standards, then she's gonna start in on me with that 'I told you so' ballet that she's been working on. Nobody should have to be there for that." He laid down in the sand, and the tide came tapping just barely to his feet. "Hope Dad can handle it."
Just under ten minutes later, Pearl was already furiously trying to explain the situation to Greg. "And, apparently, that Homeworld bitch thinks I might actually be attracted to you! Can you believe that?" She yelled.
"To be fair, Peridot's not that perceptive." Greg poured two tall glasses of lemonade. "Drink?"
"I don't drink. Anything. You know that." Pearl crossed her arms to emphasize this rejection, trying to extend it as best she could.
"Okay. More for me, then." Greg started nursing one of the cups of lemonade. "Why are you even spying on Peridot? Little green gal isn't gonna do much, especially since Jasper seems so chill about everything."
"You're trying to use your son's slang, aren't you?" Pearl asked, getting that frustrated expression, and picking up the untouched glass.
"I thought you didn't want it?" Greg asked, finishing his glass off, swallowing that last drop.
"It's not about me getting it. It's about you not having it." Pearl argued.
"So we're having trouble sharing?" Greg suggested.
"What? You're not a therapist!" Pearl yelled.
"I may be stupid, Pearl, but I can see the obvious." Greg prodded.
"Fine. But it's not what you think. Or, it's not just what you think. There are other things, too. Things you definitely wouldn't have considered..." Pearl admitted.
"I hope you're not gonna say you're sleeping with Steven, because he introduced me to his chubby blonde girlfriend." Greg smiled big, "I always knew the boy's 'tastes' would take after his old man."
"Tastes? What tastes!?" Pearl shouted, actually jumping onto the table and throwing her glass onto the concrete below, shattering it. "He's been at an all-you-can-bone buffet for a month, with every gem in the, and that nice blonde girl."
"So?" Greg shrugged. "That's basically what I did for years before I came here and found Rose. Blame the boy's rock-star half. Stop focusing on the... regular-star half."
"That's just it, Greg! It's not just something that he does. It's like, first he does it, then that behavior spreads to everyone that he's done it with. Or in front of." Pearl explained. "When it was a thing with Sadie, fine. It's not like things could turn out the way they did with R--" Pearl stopped herself, then swallowed hard before facing Greg again. "Everybody is paired up, and they don't even have the common decency to stay attached to a single partner."
"Not everyone finds a single special someone." Greg tried, fiddling with the waistband of his sweatpants. "I mean, do gems even have the ability to have sex?" He backpedaled verbally, "Without transforming, I mean."
"Gems can engage in romantic rituals with the more sensitive parts of their bodies, but we didn't really have a concept of sex until getting to an organic-populated planet." Pearl started projecting images from her head to further elaborate. "Even then, most gems are either monogamous or completely unattached."
"So, what? Are you just here to yell at me and claim my son is broken again? Because every time you say that, he proves you astonishingly wrong." Greg reminded her, walking over to retrieve the broom from its place leaning against a wall. "Maybe he's just his father's son."
"No..." Pearl jumped down from the table, taking the broom from Greg. "He's his mother's son." She swept up all the glass shards in one motion, then tossed them all at once into a nearby trash can. "I can tell. He even kisses me the same way she used to." Pearl got that dreamy look in her eyes, only broken from her reverie when she saw Greg's jaw hanging open. "I'm sorry, that was inappropriate." She started sweeping the rest of the dirty concrete floor, which was covered in the grime from all of the cars that had been through that morning.
"Like that thing where she licks the inside of your lips?" Greg asked.
"Runs her finger along your tummy?" Pearl added.
"Rubs her nose along the back of your neck, hugging you from behind?" Greg hadn't realized it, and neither had Pearl, but the two of them were now standing just inches apart. "Do you feel that?" He asked, his eyes unblinking.
Pearl dropped the broom, bringing her arms up to wrap around Greg. "This is beyond inappropriate." She rubbed her pointy nose against his little button nose, knocking him over with that surprise. Pearl brought her hands up to cup the grizzled, bearded cheeks of Greg's face. She started singing her reminiscing. "Human man, I never planned, to find you, quite so entertaining..."
Greg caught the drift of those lyrics, and quickly started adapting them from his and Rose's song, into something new. "Do you like the way, human beings play? Do you like my song?"
Pearl kissed him deep on the mouth, then broke it for a moment just to further sing. "I certainly like... to play along."
"What can I do for you?" Greg sang, asking a vital question before resuming their kiss.
When Pearl broke the kiss again, partially to let Greg breathe, she sang the answer. "You can do what no one else can do." She pulled the sweatpants all the way down to Greg's knees. He wasn't hard yet, and he was small compared to Steven. Then again, Steven was a veritable giant. "Show me all of you..." Pearl suggested, her ballet outfit vanishing in a burst of light.
Greg saw all of her lithe flesh atop him. "With each other, we'll discover..." Greg placed his hands gently on Pearl's neck and back. "Something new."
He wasn't being literal with that declaration. Pearl lowered her dripping self onto him, rolling her hips and trying to get the best feel for him being inside her... but she couldn't actually get a focus on her loins. It wasn't a lack of penetration, just the fact that she was enjoying far more the kissing of this human than most of the efforts her fellow gems had put into fingering her. She didn't mind Greg's hairy human chest and face, just so long as he had this loving-ness attached to it.
They weren't being all that creative from Pearl's perspective, but her impressive efforts drew a rapid response out of Greg. It might not have been rapid for some guys, but after just five minutes, he saw her eyes go wide, then started to cover his face. "Oh, Pearl, I'm so sorry..." Greg started to sob before Pearl pulled his hands away from his face, holding them gently in her hands.
"Greg, relax." Pearl smiled at him. "I'm not gonna get mad at you."
"You're not gonna get mad that I had sex with you?" He asked, and she shook her head 'no'. "That I came inside you, and didn't even warn you or ask permission?" And another shake of 'no'.
"It's not like there's a womb to worry about." Pearl reassured him. "But there is one thing I'd like to do if we're gonna keep going."
"Sure." Greg perked up immediately. "Anything you want."
"A door." Pearl motioned to the pair that had just walked up and started watching them.
"Hi, Pearl." Sadie giggled. "It's good to see that you and Mr. Universe are getting along."
Greg pulled his pants on and stepped in front of Pearl, trying to preserve her modesty. This was quickly crushed by Connie's comment. "Mr. Universe, this would hardly be the first time either of us has seen Pearl naked."
"That's not the point, Connie. The point is to be nice, and not force someone to stand there, exposed to everyone's stares." Greg scolded. "Your mother definitely taught you that doing that just wouldn't be... appropriate." Greg's eyes went wide as he said that last word. A flash of light behind him, and Pearl was now clad in a flowing blue dress.
She offered her hand, "Don't worry about what I said before, Greg. I think I know a place." Pearl led him past the girls, toward the temple. She turned back for a moment to address the girls. "Shouldn't you both head back to Steven, now?"
"Can't." Connie pointed at the beach, where Steven was laying. "He's asleep."
Pearl just shrugged. "Come on, Greg. Let's go to my place." Pearl was excited, practically dragging Greg as she skipped toward the temple. Hopping across the sand, and towing a now-panting Greg, she had an idea. "Don't get too used to this next part." She warned, picking up Greg and tossing his legs up onto her shoulders. "I can carry you for now, but we're gonna have to get you in shape." She chided, their fun clearly fading into her usual controlling nature.
"Round is a shape." Greg joke.
"Maybe for some people, but I don't want you passing out because of exhaustion." Pearl reminded. "I want you passing out because I'm lithe, flexible, and I... love... I've gotta tell Steven something!" She yelled, taking off at full speed with Greg atop her shoulders.
Stopping just short of stumbling over Steven, she was about to yell to wake him up, only to see that he was already looking right at her. "Pearl, carrying a human on your shoulders is not the same as fusion."
"Very funny." Pearl frowned. "Steven, I don't love you!" She said excitedly.
"That's kind of mean, don't you think?" Steven smirked at her.
"You know what I mean, Steven." Pearl didn't cross her arms, since she was still balancing Greg atop her. "I love you, but not to the extreme degree that I did yesterday, or even an hour ago."
"What did you do in the past hour?" Steven asked, already feeling uncomfortable from the oncoming answer.
"She did, um, me." Greg waved down at his son.
"Congratulations." Steven commented, standing up. "Listen, I'm still waiting for Connie and Sadie to get back from their date, so I'd really just like to get back to my cloud-gazing."
"You don't think that this is vitally important information?" Pearl asked.
Steven plucked Peridot's chart from between Pearl's petite breasts. "No. It's not that important. I'm a lot more interested in the fact that you two even got along long enough to discover something so personal." Steven smiled wide at both of them, then just snapped his fingers and started floating up into the air.
"Steven, what are you doing?" Greg demanded.
"I'm gonna see if the clouds look any different from up above, as compared to down here." Steven answered, floating away.
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The Ladies of Steven's Universe