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The Aftermath	By : GhostHelwig Category: +1 through F > Ed, Edd, and Eddy Views: 6920 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Ed Edd and Eddy, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 3
- 4
Disclaimer – I do not own or profit from Ed, Edd N Eddy. This story was created purely for my own perverted amusement. Rated R for reasons I’m sure anyone who’s gotten this far already knows.
Author’s note – I bet you all thought I’d forgotten, didn’t you? Fooled you! *grins* Seriously, I apologize for the horribly long time between updates, the tense I foolishly chose to write this in makes it very hard to write each chapter... However, I swear I will finish this story! You have my solemn vow. *gulps*
If anyone’s curious, there is a mention (but only a mention, I swear!) of an OC in this chapter, & no, you’ll never meet her in this or any other fanfic. However, she belongs to myself and darthelwig, and you will meet her in my original stories (found at fictionpress under this pen name & at my own web site, if you really want to know...). She’s not in any stories yet, now that I think about it, but she will be...
This chapter is dedicated to ShellyG, who’s class=SpellE>fanfic “Smooth Criminal” just got deleted from fanfiction.net for reasons unknown to the both of us. I know this isn’t the same as having your baby back up there, dear, but I hope it cheers you a little all the same.
Anyway, enjoy. Peace, all.

The Aftermath
Chapter 4 – That’s The Way The Edd Crumbles

They know, they know, they know.
They know what I am, they know what I’ve done. That must be what they’re discussing.
They know, they know, they know.
I’m running through the cul-de-sac, to I-don’t-even-know-where. All I can do is run, the stitch in my side slowing me down. I hate running.
But they know.
They know, they know, they know.
I’m back in my house and stumbling up to my bedroom before I can think. Finally I collapse on my childhood bed, weak-kneed and gasping.
I’ve never really left this place. I tried. Six wasted years of community college got me various degrees and many accolades, but I still hate who I am.
I think my parents hate me, too. All they wanted from me was perfection, and I delivered for a very long time, give or take a few ‘habits’ they never approved of (like my friends, for instance). But then I really failed them. I was accepted to countless Ivy League schools, on scholarships even, but where did I go?
Community college.
With Eddy for the first year, which made my parents even more resentful of him. But then he dropped out, and I kept going.
To my parents I was a failure. Sticky notes all around the house glared at me in yellow-eyed displeasure and disapproval. But I’d long since stopped caring what those notes said.
I’ve long since stopped caring about anything.
Except Ed and Eddy. I always care about Ed and Eddy.
But they know. They know, they know, they know.
I want to run, to go, to escape, but I have nowhere to go... I have nothing. Nothing besides them.
And they know.
They know who I am.
I’m weeping, but I didn’t notice it until now. I can’t stop, either. The last two people who ever had any faith in me at all now know the truth. For all my brains, for all my promise, a slut is all I ever became, all I probably ever was.
And now my two best friends know it.
*******
I don’t know when I fell asleep, but I must’ve slept for awhile – by the time I sat up it was dark outside my windows.
I find it funny that crying myself to sleep is the only time in who knows how many years that I’ve slept without nightmares.
...He comes to me in my dreams, you see. Always.
It’s then I hear a knock. I know who it is. I wonder, fleetingly, why they bother knocking. They don’t have to.
I stumble downstairs, unable to fully wake up. I’ve been utterly worn out and exhausted for what feels like years now... I guess that happens when you’re afraid to sleep, and have bad dreams when you finally manage to...
I’m at the door before I know it, and as the doorknob turns beneath my palm I feel a sudden, inexplicable dread. I shouldn’t open the door.
But that’s irrational, illogical, and thus it has no place in my life.
I shake off my strange thoughts with an irritated sigh. The isolation and cold I surround my heart with must be affecting my sanity, for me to be thinking this way...
I open the door, and instead of seeing Ed and Eddy-
There’s Eddy’s brother.
I scream. And all he does is smile in that sickening way he has, that way that is so like Eddy’s cocky grin that it causes me physical pain to look at it. I try to slam the door, but he blocks it with his foot. And while I struggle to push the door forward he suddenly moves, ramming his way into my house – it’s only my quick and fearful backing up that keeps him from colliding with me.
But he moves towards me quicker than I can walk backwards, and he’s reaching for me, and his hands are on my shoulders and I’m screaming. And he leers at me and his lips are descending and I’m screaming even louder and he’s shaking me, shaking me roughly, shaking me...
And calling me Edd?
Suddenly my eyes are opening, and I find myself staring into Eddy’s concerned face. His warm hands are on my shoulders, and behind him I see Ed staring at me, too...
Even though I know it will only confuse them, even though I know I have to hide, I let the tears fall. What does it matter anyway, since they already know my sins? They’ve seen the evil in me – showing them weakness is nothing compared to that.
I expect Eddy to move then, to let me go quickly – emotional outbursts that don’t involve anger but pain have always embarrassed and upset him. But he just stares at me, and his hands begin to rub my shoulders, gently. I think... I think he’s trying to comfort me. And the shock that causes it not nearly so bad as the guilt I suddenly feel – I do Eddy a huge disservice by being surprised at all by his care.
I rub my eyes, trying to halt the flood, barely hearing Ed’s worried commentary on the situation. He’s such a good person, Ed is... They both are good people. Better than I feel I deserve.
I pull away from Eddy, earning myself a strangely annoyed glare from suddenly veiled blue eyes. Eddy has a secret, or so he thinks, that’s easy enough to see. And with baited breath I wait for him to speak, to tell me what he knows, while inside me a great font of chaotic desperation swells and spins.
Eddy was never patient, never the type to wait long. Soon he’s opening his mouth-
But before he can speak words are spilling unchecked out of mine.
And I damn myself with each one.
*******
“You don’t know how it was! When it started – it was just Kevin at first, I swear! He found me after school in the library, I was working late, you know, shelving books when I had my job there? And he was looking for something, “The Iliad” if I recall correctly, and I helped him find it, and afterwards he grabbed me, and he kissed me, and okay, I know it was stupid, but I just let him! I didn’t ask him to, I didn’t want him to, but he wanted me, and so I–“
In a small voice I say, “I did what he wanted.”
They don’t speak, don’t blink. And their stark silence spurs me into hurried speech once more.
“It stopped when we went to college, Kevin was here, at the jawbreaker factor, so it had to stop! But I – okay, there were boys at college, too, never the same ones more than once... And girls, a few, but... I had a girlfriend for a while, you remember, don’t you, Eddy? Cassie was great, but I couldn’t – she knew there was something wrong with me, y’see. She knew. Oh, but Ed, you should’ve met her, she would’ve loved you...”
I know I’m losing focus, getting off-track, so I switch gears. And still Ed and Eddy are utterly quiet, Ed staring at me with a kind of mystified unease, Eddy looking at me like he’s never seen me before.
It breaks my heart.
“When I came back here after college I swore I’d be better. But I – I couldn’t change. I can’t change. Kevin found me the day I came back, and then when I visited Rolf he... I think Kevin must’ve told him, because he was really open with what he wanted. We were in his barn, and he-“
I stop when I see Ed’s jaw twitch. Too much information is flooding in, I think I’m losing him. And I really shouldn’t be giving them details of my first ‘encounter’ with Rolf, anyway...
I continue, but I’m losing steam. I wish I hadn’t started. I wish Ed wouldn’t stare. I wish...
I wish Eddy was still staring, because now he can’t even look at me.
“Jonny was next,” I practically whisper. “Him and... and Plank.” I stifle an inappropriate giggle. That piece of wood isn’t even a shell of it’s former self, it’s still long but so skinny it’s starting to resemble an overlarge toothpick, but he uses it on me, and it’s degrading beyond words... I can’t bear to say any more about Jonny and Plank, so I move on.
“And then there’s Jimmy,” I say softly. This time Eddy’s cheek twitches. He and Jimmy have a history that is as colorful as mine with Jimmy’s is dark. And both Eddy and I know it, now.
“Jimmy – he explained it to me as an experiment, as helping him find out who he is,” I add quietly. “But it was a lie. I could tell the first time he touched me that he knew precisely what he was doing, and why. He uses me. I think... I think he uses me to get to you, Eddy.”
That’s enough to make Eddy finally look up, locking eyes with me. I’m nearly sent off into hysterics again when I see that the reason Eddy couldn’t look me in the face was because he was crying. I know how much his own tears embarrass him.
But before I can offer any words of comfort, he speaks, in a soft, broken voice that is quite terribly unlike him.
“Is that... everyone?”
My turn to lower my gaze. I shake my head.
A strangled sound escapes Eddy, and I look back up at him. In a choked whisper, he asks, “not Sarah?” He can’t help but glance over his shoulder at Ed, who’s still standing where he was when I first saw him, processing my words but having thankfully not heard Eddy’s. Or so I know we both pray.
Again I shake my head, and Eddy’s eyes go disbelieving and wide. “Nazz?” he asks in an unmistakably amazed tone. All I can do is shake my head one more time. My words have dried up.
Eddy’s eyes narrow, a look I instantly recognize. The wheels in his head are turning, and he doesn’t like what they’re showing him. The anger will follow. To stem its flow, I force myself to speak through lips gone utterly dry.
“They kept saying, ‘we’ve only got a little bit of time left’. Do you remember? They’d say that, and they’d grab us, and say how ‘tonight’s the night’, and ‘nothing will be the same’ and I... I panicked. I went to their home after school. I offered myself, to keep both of you safe. I thought, ‘if one of us has to suffer this, it might as well be me’.”
I look at my lap, at my hands twisting around each other, at my useless, powerless, ugly fingers.
“They agreed,” I say softly. “They took turns with me. My first experience with women.” I laugh, bitterly, tasting bile in the back of my throat. “But it was fitting, don’t you think? The Kankers were my first kisses from women, too, after all.”
I shake my head, a few worthless tears falling down my cheeks. I force myself to keep on, though the room feels so cold now, and tense, and harsh...
It’s so harsh it hurts.
“They laughed at me when it was all over. It turned out, they were moving away that night... And if I’d bothered to use my brain before panicking like I had, I would’ve noticed the boxes all around their trailer, the packing tape... But I lost my head, because I was scared. I didn’t want you and Ed to suffer like... I didn’t want you to suffer.”
I bite my tongue, glad I caught myself before I revealed too much. How would Eddy feel if he knew what his brother had done-
And that I’d let him do it?
But before I can pursue that thought, Eddy has shot up from the bed, distancing himself from me with hurried, angry steps. I suddenly want to vomit.
He spins back towards me, and his loud voice even causes the poor, still stunned Ed to flinch.
“Don’t you dare say you did this because of Ed and me! We would never have asked you to sacrifice yourself like that! And what the hell did you think the Kankers were gonna do, anyway? Rape us? Even if they had, I would’ve preferred it to you turning yourself into some kinda whore!”
He’s breathing hard, while I suddenly can’t breathe at all.
For whatever reason, Ed chooses then to burst into tears. His anguish stops both Eddy and me cold. Hurting him is something we both, whether Eddy will admit it or not, studiously avoid.
But I can’t comfort Ed, not now, and Eddy’s never known how. So all Eddy can do is tell Ed to go home, that he’ll meet him there-
And all I can do is... nothing.
Ed leaves after a lot of prompting and practically pushing from Eddy, while I just sit and watch... and wait. Eddy’s not through with me yet. If he was, he would’ve left with Ed.
Sure enough, he turns to me as soon as Ed is out the door, and for a moment I think he’s going to yell some more, or maybe spit on me. Rolf did that once. But though I can tell Eddy wants to yell, he doesn’t – when he speaks, his voice is low, hard and sad all at once, and it cuts me all the deeper because of it.
“We came here to tell you... we were both in love with you.”
I can feel my own eyes widening, filling with tears, as Eddy just stares at me, hard. There’s so much in his dark gaze that I can’t read it at all.
He leaves. And I sink down to the bed, unable to see through the haze of my tears. They didn’t know.
...But they do now.
- 3
- 4
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The Aftermath