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Aventure Amoureuse	By : Baron Category: +M through R > Miraculous LadyBug Views: 5012 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction for adults. Miraculous Ladybug and its characters are not mine, and are the property of ZAG-inc. I make no profit from this and all characters are 18+.

Chapter List
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The elevator makes it back to the lobby as the doors ding open. You sling the duffel bag over your shoulder and carry the Davy Crockett gun on your other shoulder as you nod goodbye to Jean. "Be careful out there. Don't fire that nuclear weapon at anything close range or you'll get a lethal dose of radiation. If possible, fire it from a rooftop or a helicopter." Jean warns you. "Thanks, Jeano. Don't worry, I'll be back to squeeze Chloe's ass and have a brandy with you telling you all the details." you grin with a sly smile. "Godspeed." Jean says with a smile as you walk out the door. You survey the city as you spot the giant ape far out in the harbor smashing the French navy ships like a spoiled child bored with their toys. Many of the buildings and landmarks around Paris lie in heaps of smoldering ruin. Some of the cars are flattened where the large ape stepped on them. Several police cars speed through the streets toward the giant ape with their lights and sirens wailing in the distance. You walk out into the street forcing a motorcycle with a side car to slam on its brakes. You notice the sidecar has "Vito's Authentic Pizzaria" written on the side of it. "I'm sorry, but I need to borrow your bike." you say as you pull the driver off of the motorcycle and toss the duffel bag into the sidecar. You speed off towards the ape as the driver swears at you in Italian flicking their chin at you with the back of their hand. You ride over to the crater where you last saw Ladybug and park the bike. You look into the crater and see Ladybug in a painful-looking contorted position laying still. "I hope her back isn't broken, cause we gotta get out of here." you say lifting the limp body of the young heroine and carrying her back to the motorcycle. You carefully set her into the sidecar making sure she the nuclear waste doesn't drip on her. "Hang on, bug girl. If you die, Chat will be furious. Oh shit! I almost forgot about Chat Noir!" you say as you see the young hero still unconscious in the fist of the giant blue ape. You kickstart the motorcycle and speed toward the harbor to save your young love. As you pass under a bridge something heavy lands in the sidecar making you swerve and almost crash the bike. You look over to see Viperion perched on the back of the sidecar holding onto your shoulder. "Nice of you to drop in, Viperion." you say looking at him out of the corner of your eye as you speed through traffic. "I never miss a party." he says climbing into the sidecar with Ladybug and your weapons. "I could probably use the help... friend." you smile at your former enemy. "I take it you're applying for a job at the post office?" Viperion says looking at all the firearms in your bag. "Animal control." you reply as you swerve between cars on the road. "Um... I think one of your guns is leaking." Viperion says as he watches the Davy Crockett gun drip slime onto the road behind you. "Don't worry, I'll be using that soon." you reply with an almost giddy grin. "Did anyone ever tell you that you get a real scary look in your eye sometimes?" he says leaning away from you. "Yeah, I get that a lot." you chuckle madly. "I take it there's no extra helmets in here either." Viperion says eating a slice of pizza. "No, I should have taken the driver's helmet when I jacked the bike. By the way, where did you get pizza from?" you ask him curiously as a police car speeds down a sidestreet. "I found it on the floor. You want some? I think it's sausage and mushroom." Viperion says analyzing the flavor. "Nah, I just ate a clam earlier." you grin as you smash through a barricade that says "Route Barrée" on it. "Who taught you how to drive? Grand Theft Auto?" he says brushing the wooden splinters off of his costume. "No... Outrun." you say as you rev the bike to its maximum speed forcing Viperion back into his seat. "Oh, shit! The bridge is out! Are you illiterate or something?" he asks covering his eyes. "No, I just can't read French. I'm sorry, Viperion." you say as you continue watching the road. "You don't have to apologise, we're past being enemies. We're friends now!" he says in an attempt to reassure you. "No, you misunderstand me. I said, I'M SORRY Viperion." you say holding up the peg that connects the sidecar to the motorcycle. "Wait a minute... what are you doing?" he screams as the sidecar begins to separate from the motorcycle. "Saving my friends." you say as you grab the weapons out of the rolling sidecar before it breaks to the right sending Ladybug and Viperion softly careening into a large bush. "Take care of her, Viperion!" you shout as you weave through construction equipment heading towards the giant ape. It's still in the harbor holding a limp Chat Noir smashing navy ships with its free hand. You notice the bridge ahead of you is missing and the giant ape has its back turned to you. "The crazy shit I do for people I love." you quip as you steer toward a stack of planks on the side of the unfinished bridge. You yank back on the handlebars making the motorcycle rear up on its back wheel as you collide with the planks propelling you off of the bridge and high into the air above the water below. "Wow, look at that view. It's beautiful!" you say before screaming in terror and diving off the bike. The motorcycle collides with the ape's lower back as you land on it and grip its fur in your fists. The impact of the motorcycle causes the giant ape to yell out in pain before it turns around and smashes the bridge you were just on into a cloud of pebbles and rebar. You notice how high up you are when a hand grenade falls out of your duffel bag and freefalls for a while before landing in the water below with a splash. You grip the ape's fur and start climbing up its back. The ape attempts to shake you off and grab you, but it's unable to reach you between its massive shoulders. You continue to climb until you reach the back of its neck and see it still clutching a nearly-lifeless Chat Noir in its fist. If the ape drops him, he'll probably drown before you can swim to shore with him. "Get your stinking paws off of him, you damn dirty ape!" you yell as you unload your Striker into the side of the giant ape's head. The ape screams in pain not liking the buckshot in its face or your cheesy Planet of the Apes reference. It flails it's arms wildly trying to swat you off of its head as you lob a grende into its mouth infuriating it even more. It grabs its mouth in pain and drops Chat Noir. "Oh, shit! What have I done?" you yell as you fire the FN MAG into its face and dive backwards off of the ape's shoulders. Chat lands in the water with a large splash and disappears beneath the waves. You land in the water nearby having difficulty swimming with all the additional weight of the guns you're carrying. You search the water for Chat Noir and find him rapidly sinking to the bottom with a trail of bubbles coming from his mouth. You swim down and grab his wrist pulling him back up slightly. You strike him hard in his sternum with your palm making him open his eyes. You quickly grab him by the back of his head and press your mouth tightly against his as you sacrifice your oxygen to refill the air in his lungs. You clasp your hand over his mouth to prevent water from seeping in as you struggle to swim to the surface. You put your head above the waves and take a much needed breath as you pull Chat Noir onto your shoulder keeping his head above the water. You barely make it to shore but manage to drag Chat's broken body onto the beach and pull out your M79 grenade launcher. "No more monkeyshines, asshole!" you say as you point the weapon at the rampaging ape and pull the trigger. The hammer hits the grenade with a hollow soggy click. You look at the M79 with confusion as you open it and a stream of water pours out of the useless firearm. "Oh, shit. Heh. Did I ever mention how much I loved BJ and the Bear?" you say to the furious ape as you grab Chat Noir and run away in terror across a large pier. The ape wastes no time following you as it slams its fists into the pier swinging its legs and rapidly closing the the distance gap between you. "Chat, I need your powers! Wake up!" you say as you gently shake and slap the young hero. "Huh? L-Ladybug?" he says barely able to move his shattered body. "No, listen to me! I need your powers! Now! Like right now!" you plead with the injured hero as you hold his hand in front of his face showing him his ring. "Powers? My... destruction?" he asks seeming to be having trouble breathing. "Yes! I need your destruction power right now! Please!" you urgently shout as the giant ape barrels down the pier almost on top of you. "Cat... a... clysm..." he says weakly as his right hand glows black with the power of destruction. "Bad monkey! No fuckin' banana!" you scream at the giant blue ape as you grasp Chat Noir's wrist and slam it into the pier causing it to crumble beneath your feet. The ape's massive weight proves disadvantageous as it topples backward and the pier collapses beneath it. You run across the crumbling pier and dive into the sand with Chat Noir as you watch the ape plummet behind you and land in the water with a huge splash. You carefully set Chat Noir down on the beach. "Heh... my... hero." he says weakly putting his hand against your cheek and coughing up blood. His ring beeps and flashes as you hold his hand. You notice one of the footpads on his paw ring flicker and disappear. There were four pads, now there's only three. "Chat, wake up! What does this mean?" you say shaking his wrist and pointing at his ring. He doesn't answer. He's unconscious again and you can see his injuries are quite severe. One of his arms is twisted and his legs appear to be broken. You touch his chest and feel broken ribs and his labored breathing. "Fuck, don't die on me damn you!" you say as you push yourself out of the sand and get back to your feet. "I can't take you to the hospital or they'll discover your identity. Maybe Jean can help me or Viperion if I can find him." you say to the unresponsive young cat boy. His ring beeps again and another foot pad disappears. "Is this some kind of countdown? What happens when it runs out? Is it some type of life monitor?" you attempt to ask the limp cat boy in your arms as you carry him into the street. "HELP ME! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME!!!" you scream with urgent despair in your voice.
A car behind you slams on its brakes as you hear a voice shout: "Hey, I remember you. You're that cool-ass spy! You need a lift?" You turn around to see the hip young taxi driver from earlier sticking his head out of the window of his cab while Natural Born Killaz by Dr. Dre and Ice Cube blares on his radio. "Lamar? Man, am I fuckin' glad to see you!" you say happily to your ebony savior. "Hurry up and get in! There's a crazy giant monkey attacking Paris!" Lamar says as you load Chat Noir into the backseat. "Uh... yeah. About that..." you say as you see the ape climb back up onto the beach and make a furious dash towards Lamar's taxi. "Oh, HELL no!" Lamar says as he stomps the accelerator into the floor knocking you back into your seat and forcing the rear door closed. "Take me to Le Grand Paris, Lamar!" you say as you dry out your weapons in the backseat. "No problem, it's not too far away. By the way, is that Chat Noir?" the cab driver asks curiously. "Yeah... it was." you say as Chat's ring beeps again and another footpad disappears. You put your arm behind his head to try to stabilize his breathing. "Please hurry, Lamar." you say looking at his eyes in the rearview mirror with desperation. "I'm going as fast as this bucket will go. We're almost there, just hang on!" he says as he recklessly weaves through traffic honking his horn. You see the blue gorilla running behind the car as your guns finish drying. You stick the FN MAG out of the rear window and dump a belt into the charging.ape. The blue gorilla is injured, but seems to only get angrier as it continues its relentless pursuit. "You better think of something fast! This car isn't Kong-proof!" Lamar shouts looking at you in the rearview mirror as he swerves. You sacrifice the tire of a passing car making it lose control in front of the charging ape. The gorilla hits the car with its legs tripping over the vehicle and landing on its face as Lamar makes a sharp 90° right turn forcing you and Chat Noir into the rear passenger door. You cradle him in your arms and take the brunt of the impact as you try to keep Chat's body still. "Watch the turns, man!" you shout at your panicked driver. "Sorry about that, but I think we lost him." Lamar says looking behind him. "The hotel is two blocks over. We're almost there!" he continues as he zig zags though a few sidestreets to ensure the ape won't follow. "We're here. That shit got a little too real for me back there." Lamar says as he exhales in relief. "Thanks, Lamar. Let's get a beer or something sometime. Here, buy yourself a stiff one on me. You damn well earned it." you say as you hand him a large bill. "Just doing my thing." he grins as he helps you carry Chat Noir into the elevator and waves you goodbye.
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Aventure Amoureuse