Full House

I do not own Hazbin Hotel nor do I own the characters or settings.

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Husk had been watching Angel all day. The entertainer hadn’t acted like himself for the past few days, but the cat knew he would tell him what was wrong when he was ready. He knew Angel needed time to think about situations before coming for advice and he wouldn’t push him before he was ready.

Later that day, the spider demon makes his way to the bar and sits down heavily on one of the seats. Husk gives him a concerned look, “Everything okay?”

“Eh…I’ve been better.” He places his elbows on the bar and props his chin in his hands, “Just stressed I guess.”

“Can I fix you a drink?” Husk reaches for a glass but Angel shakes his head.

He swallows a few times and looks like he might be sick, “Nah…I…um…not in the mood for drinking.”

The cat demon nods, “Wanna talk about it?”

Angel thinks about the two pink lines upstairs in his bedroom and decides to just bite the bullet, “Yeah…it actually involves you.”

Husk’s large eyebrows furrow at hearing Angel’s words, “If it’s about that thing I did in the bedroom the other night then…”

“No, it ain’t that…I liked that.” He sits up straighter as he looks at Husk, “I do need to tell ya something though.”

“Okay.” Husk looks down at the bar as he continues speaking, “I have something I need to tell you too.”

Angel’s face shows his surprise at Husk’s words, “Oh, well you should go first.”

The bartender swallows audibly as he shakes his head, “No, I really think you should go first.”

They both give the other a concerned look and Husk places a closed sign on the bar, “You know, maybe, we should talk somewhere more private?”

Angel nods as he stands up, “Yeah, that seems like a good idea.”

The cat demon walks around the bar and gestures toward the stairs with a nod. Angel follows him up the stairs, his heart pounding. They finally make it to Husk’s bedroom and the cat pushes the door open, “After you.”

The porn star walks into the room and forces his tears back. He refused to cry while telling Husk he was pregnant. He hears the lock click and he turns once again to face the father of his unborn baby. Husk is the first to speak, “I’m all ears, kid. What’s wrong?”

Angel hugs all four of his arms around himself as he turns watery eyes toward Husk, “You remember the night we drank that weird booze?”

Husk nods, “How could I forget?”

“Right.” The spider demon clears his throat before continuing, “Anyway, I…uh…I think that booze did something to me and not just the horny part.” He sighs as he tries to keep Husk’s gaze, “I think I’m…”

Before Angel can finish his confession, Husk interrupts him, “Oh, fuck…don’t tell me you’re pregnant?!”

Angel’s mismatched eyes widen at Husk’s words, “How in the hell could ya possibly know that’s what I was gonna say?”

A guilty expression passes over Husk’s features as he speaks his next words, “Because that’s what I was going to tell you.”

The entertainer feels the room spinning as he grabs Husk’s shoulders in his upper hands, “Fucking come again?  !”

“I’m pregnant.”

“This can’t be happening!” He releases Husk’s shoulders and places his hands on his head, “How did this happen?!”

The cat demon gives him a condescending look, “You’re a porn star…I didn’t think I’d have to explain how babies are made.”

“No, I fucking know that, but how in the hell are we both pregnant?!”

Husk clears his throat before speaking again, “Well, I fucked you over the bar and then you asked if I had ever bottomed bef…”

“Ah! Shit…fuck…that’s not what I meant!” Angel turns away from Husk and starts pacing the room hyperventilating, “Fuck…fuck…fuck!”

Husk lets him spiral for a moment before grabbing one of the spider demon’s lower limbs. He spins him around into a tight embrace and holds him there, “Calm down, Legs. This ain’t ideal by any means, but we’re gonna get through this.”

Angel finally breaks down allowing his tears to seep into the fur of Husk’s shoulder, “Th-This ain’t wh-what I thought was g-gonna happen wh-when I told ya!”

The bartender squeezes his friend even tighter as he responds, “Yeah, how do ya think I feel? I haven’t fucking bottomed in years.”

Angel cries silently for a few minutes before pulling back from Husk’s embrace. He wipes his eyes before flopping down onto the cat’s bed, “How did ya know you were pregnant? What made ya test anyway?”

Husk lets out a tired sigh as he joins Angel on the bed, “I been feeling like shit.” He rubs his paws on his knees as he continues, “Tired all the time, starving but if I eat anything I just throw it up…and I cried watching a cheese commercial the other night.”

The spider demon can’t help but giggle a bit about the cheese commercial, “Same.”

“I got to thinking about that weird booze and how I…I let you…finish inside me and…” He looks away from Angel as his cheeks turn pink, “The timeline made sense…it ain’t the strangest thing that’s ever happened in Hell I don’t suppose.”

Angel nods as he places his lower hands on his stomach, “When were ya gonna tell me?”

“Tonight.” He sighs again as he takes one of Angel’s upper hands in his, “You been working a lot and I didn’t want to tell you before you had to go to work and you had tonight off.”

Angel looks at Husk with a questioning expression, “So, what are we gonna do now?”

“I don’t think we should tell anyone yet until we find out for sure what’s really going on.”

“About that…” A guilty expression plays on the entertainer’s face, “I kinda already told Cherri, but she’s good…I mean she ain’t gonna say nothing.”

Husk gives him a thoughtful look, “Is that why she keeps giving me strange looks?”

“Oh no…she’s giving ya strange looks because I told her what ya penis looks like.”

A confused and slightly offended look spreads across the cat demon’s features at Angel’s confession, “I don’t even want to know.”

Angel shrugs, “I do think we should tell Charlie though. She could probably help find a place to get everything checked out.”

Husk nods his agreement, “Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.”

Husk stands up first and pulls Angel up by the hand he’s still holding. They make their way downstairs and eventually find Charlie. Angel is the first to speak, “Hey, Charlie…can Husk and I talk to ya…in private?”

She looks back and forth between their faces with a worried expression, “Um, sure…is everything okay?”

Husk crosses his arms and scowls, “That depends on your definition of okay.”

She looks at each of them again before responding, “Right, let’s go to the study.”

The two demons follow her down the hall where they reach the study. Charlie shuts and locks the door and turns to face them, “Have a seat and tell me what’s going on.”

The three of them take a seat and Angel begins, “I’m not even gonna beat around the bush with this one.” He looks toward Husk, “Do ya want me to tell her?”

Husk nods and Angel continues, “We’re pregnant.”

Charlie looks taken aback for a moment before letting out a nervous chuckle, “Ha, ha…good one…you’re pranking me, right?”

Husk lets out a frustrated sigh, “We’re not joking, princess.”

Her expression changes to one of confusion, “Am I missing something? I thought…”

The porn star cuts her off, “Oh, we both got dicks if that’s what you’re asking.”

Husk gives him an exasperated look, “I knew I should have done the talking.”

Charlie continues to look confused as she asks her next question, “I don’t understand.”

The cat demon crosses his arms, “That makes three of us.”

Angel looks at Husk again and the bartender nods, “Well, we drank this weird booze, then we fucked a buncha times and now we’re pregnant.”

Husk once again gives Angel a scandalized look, “She didn’t need to know about the fucking. She knows how babies are made.”

Angel shrugs, “Yeah, but that was the best part.”

With a head shake Husk sighs again, “I really should have done the talking.”

Charlie is silent for a moment as she takes it all in, “Okay…so magic alcohol and now there’s a baby, right?”

They both nod and she smiles, “Aw! Congratulations!” When neither demon looks excited, her smile quickly turns into a frown, “Um…not congratulations?”

They both shake their heads and Angel speaks up again, “We didn’t drink that magic shit on purpose to cause this…we didn’t want this to happen.”

She continues to try to think positively about the situation and offers her next statement, “But at least the two of you are in a loving relationship to welcome the baby.”

Angel lets out a defeated sigh, “We ain’t together…we just…um…we just fuck.”

Husk buries his face in his paws, “I’m definitely doing the talking next time.”

Having seemingly given up on positivity, she looks at them in desperation, “Well, at least tell me which one of you is caring out little bundle of joy?”

“Doll face, we were being literal.” He looks at Husk again, “We’re pregnant…it ain’t no play on words.”

When she continues to look confused, Husk speaks up, “We’re both pregnant…we’re versatile.”

When the princess of Hell remains silent Angel responds, “We took turns.”

“But…” She looks between them again but doesn’t finish her sentence.

Angel leans over and whispers to Husk, “Are ya sure she knows how babies are made?”

As Charlie continues to look like she may combust on the spot, Angel speaks once again, “He fucked me then I fucked him…we knocked each other up.”

Husk lets out a groan, “You are never allowed to do the talking again.”

“So…you’re both having each other’s baby?”

The spider demon dramatically claps all four hands loudly, “Winner, winner gets a prize!”

“Oh, wow!” She stands up and begins pacing the small room, “This is not what I was expecting.”

Husk leans back in his seat with a grumble, “Join the fucking club.”

Her smile finally returns and she’s back to her bubbly, positive self, “Then it’s such great news that you quit drugs a few months ago, Angel.”

The entertainer sinks down into the chair and crosses all his arms, “Oh, yeah…so great that I have no coping mechanisms to deal with all this bullshit.”

Charlie continues as if Angel hadn’t spoken, “But the two of you will need to stop drinking.”

Both men gag at the mention of alcohol and Husk responds, “Don’t worry about that…I can barely pour someone else a drink without puking ever since I found out.”

Angel nods, “Same.”

“Okay then.” She stops pacing and gives them both a curious look, “So when are you going to tell everyone else?”

“That’s where you come in, princess.”

Charlie turns toward Husk after hearing him speak, “You want me to tell everyone else?”

Husk shakes his head, “We need help finding a place to get checked out and make sure this is what’s really going on and if it is we need to see if everything is okay.”

Angel nods, “Yeah, we figured if anyone could find a place it would be you.”

She gives them a smile, “Of course I can do that for you guys. I’ll start looking right away.”

Angel gives her a thankful smile, “Thanks, Charlie.”

She finally looks each of them in the eyes in turn, “I know this isn’t what either of you planned, but I just know the two of you will learn to be the best parents.”

Suddenly, Angel and Charlie hear sniffling and they turn to see Husk wiping his eyes. Charlie gives him a worried look, “Husk, are you okay?”

He waves his paw in a dismissive gesture, “It’s this fucking pregnancy…just don’t tell anyone.”

The three of them leave the study with Charlie promising to get back with them once she’d found somewhere to have everything checked out.

TBC…