Adult-FanFiction.org : Cartoons

Curse of the Devilspawn!	By : acsoundwave Category: Transformers > G1 > Crossovers Views: 1033 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers, Gobots, Spider-Man, X-Men, GI Joe, Iron Man, The Black Panther, The Fantastic Four, nor The Avengers. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 2
- 3
- 4
TRANSFORMERS: CYBERTRON SAGA
CURSE OF THE DEVILSPAWN! Special #3: ICONOCLAST, Part One.
byline: Anubis C. Soundwave
Scene: 1
Grimlock watches as Sludge finishes packing. "Am you Sludge ready?" he asks.
Sludge closes his supply pack and shunts it to subspace, then nods.
"Not that," sighs Grimlock.
"Then what, Grimlock?" asks Sludge.
"Am you ready to command Dinobots is what me Grimlock ask," says Grimlock.
"No," says Sludge, "but him Optimus tell me Sludge to lead Dinobots in mission, so me Sludge do."
Grimlock growls. "Me Grimlock no understand order," he says. "Am me Grimlock bad leader?"
"You Grimlock am good leader." Sludge smiles, placing his hands on Grimlock's shoulders. "Me Sludge no get order either, but Sludge work hard to be good leader too. No am want Dinobots to fail."
Grimlock studies Sludge, then gives the latter a salute. "Then me Grimlock will work at being best follower," he says. "Keep Sludge from making Grimlock's rookie mistakes."
"Thank you," says Sludge.
Scene: 2
"Why would you put Sludge in command of the Dinobots?" Turbo asks Optimus. "Grimlock has the command experience, and is the lead Dinobot."
"Are you seriously lecturing me on my own troops?" counters Optimus, chuckling. "I know the Dinobots. I've seen them at their worst."
"I'm just trying to get at your reasoning," says Turbo.
"One," says Optimus, "Sludge is the Dinobots' expert on our destination. Two, Grimlock already leans on Sludge as a second," he continues, "so it's not as much of a stretch as you think."
"But Sludge is a born follower--or built, I should say," says Turbo.
"Has it ever occured to you to question Leader One's orders?" Optimus asks.
"Sure, although he's almost never wrong," says Turbo.
"I see." Optimus grabs a datapad. "This isn't just a learning experience for Sludge; it's one for Grimlock as well."
Turbo gives Optimus a skeptical look. "Now really isn't the best time for on-the-job training," he says.
"The Dinobots are one of my most solid units," says Optimus, "and they have the potential to be one of my best. Furthermore, they insisted on this."
"The Guardians don't have green fighters on the field taking on dangers even vets had a hard time handling," says Turbo. "Scooter's a survivalist," he continues, "and we're not bringing him into this."
"I expect that you and Leader One both know what Scooter can handle. Likewise," continues Optimus, "I know what the Dinobots can take."
Turbo strokes his chin.
"Besides," says Optimus, "the Autobots don't have an Academy, or any place for our junior soldiers to train safely. Unfortunately, it's sink-or-swim: not just for the Dinobots, but for the Aerialbots as well."
"Leader One's offered the Academy for the Aerialbots," Turbo notes, grinning. "Even so, those air jockies have the finesse needed for this mission."
"And the Aerialbots will join the mission," says Optimus, "when we need them. Right now," he continues, "we need the Dinobots."
"Led by Sludge," says Turbo, dubious.
Optimus nods.
"This will be...illuminating." Turbo leaves the Control Room.
Ironhide shakes his head. "I hate to give that hothead any credit," he says, "but I'm leery of letting Sludge lead, too."
"Sludge is one of our best listeners," says Optimus. "He will prove himself."
Scene: 3
Braxis stares at the walls of his cell inside Autobot Headquarters. "Are we leaving yet?" he asks.
Leader One levels a mean grin at the scientist. "You are still our prisoner, Doctor," he says.
"Are you still upset about that business with the Puzzler?" he asks.
"Do you want to live?" asks Leader One, scowling.
"Yes!" says Braxis. "As long as possible."
"Ah. 'Yes' is also my answer," says Leader One.
"May I at least ask why you would deign to guard me yourself?" Braxis asks.
"At the moment," says Leader One, "we need you alive. Most of the Guardians on tap for this mission are in a black mood."
"But Turbo's my usual guard and overseer on these field trips," says Braxis.
"And I just stated that we need you alive, Doc." Leader One studies a large fedora.
Braxis sighs dramatically. "When do I get the notes on this project so that I can bring myself up to speed?" he asks.
"When we head to the planet," says Leader One.
"No trust at all." Braxis shakes his head.
Scene: 4
"Will you be okay?" Scooter asks Small Foot. "Turbo won't let me go; they're taking Hound. Hound."
"I'll be fine, Scoot," says Small Foot. "I've got a score to settle with the Devilspawn."
"Hound?" Scooter winces.
"He's the Autobots' tracker, and he generates holograms," counters Small Foot.
"And he has functional weapons systems," Scooter sighs.
"Turbo and Pumper were both fragged by that...thing." Small Foot seethes.
"Look: I know I'm not the bravest or most level-headed Guardian in a crisis," says Scooter, "but I'll do what I have to do when you need me."
"And you're upset because you sense that Turbo needs you, am I right?" Small Foot asks.
"Bingo," says Scooter.
"Turbo...needs to know you're safe," says Small Foot, "and nowhere near a monster that only lives to ream other creatures."
"But I'm a Guardian, right?" asks Scooter. "I have to deal with scrap like this sooner or later, don't I?"
"Our lieutenant senior has decided that it will be later," says Small Foot curtly, "and you must accept that."
"But I can help him!" Scooter tenses his fists.
"If anything happened to you on Turbo's watch, Naotoki," says Small Foot, "I think he'd crack."
Scooter scowls. "I understand logically," he says, tapping his head.
"It's not your courage or frailty that's in question." Small Foot places a hand on Scooter's head. "It's Turbo and Leader One's sanity."
Scooter stares at Small Foot.
"You're their lighthouse," she continues, "their port of call in the storm. Thus, Turbo has you right where you need to be: for his sake as well as yours."
Small Foot walks toward the Guardian shuttle parked outside Autobot Headquarters.
Scooter drops to his haunches. "Turbo really needs to talk to people."
Scene: 5
Leader One enters the main control room, silently watching Fireflight at Teletraan One.
"Hello, Leader One," says Fireflight, still inputting data into the computer. "I take it that someone else is guarding Dr. Braxis?"
"Yes. You heard me enter?" asks Leader One.
Fireflight continues with his input. "Peripheral vision," he answers. "My dad installed the best visual sensors credits could buy when he built me."
Leader One laughs. "My parents were loaded too," he says, "but my optics are shot."
"They're not that bad," says Fireflight. "I've seen them sputter occasionally. Your optical relays are just burnt out. Ratchet or Rest-Q could fix them."
"I guess...I just like the way my visor looks." Leader One places a hand on Fireflight's shoulder as he observes Fireflight's work.
Fireflight stops typing, turning to Leader One. "You want to know what I'm doing?"
"No; I'm just surprised that you've already generated a topographical map of our target planet," says Leader One. "We haven't even left your base."
"We don't need to," says Fireflight. "The Ark was originally a spacecruiser," he continues, resuming his input. "The long-range visual sensors on here, when connected to my own sensors, gives me great shots of the planet."
"And Teletraan helps you generate a global map," says Leader One. "That's pretty resourceful."
"Thank you," says Fireflight, blushing.
"Why doesn't Optimus send you on missions with Slingshot?" Leader One asks. "It would save your partner time and grief, and reduce his injuries."
"No one sends me on missions." Fireflight shrugs. "I get distracted on the field unless I'm with the whole team."
"Really?" asks Leader One. "Because you're splitting your focus between your map, a small solar system past the Kuiper Belt, and me without any trouble."
"Space, this confining volcanic cave of a base, and you aren't distracting," says Fireflight. "Outside, Earth has a lot of natural beauty that I notice."
"To the point where you can't always see the forest for the trees," Leader One says, smiling.
Fireflight winces.
"Why are you doing all this ground work?" Leader One asks. "Did Optimus ask you to?"
"No. The five of us are making sure we hit the air flying when we do arrive," says Fireflight.
Leader One stares at Fireflight.
"Slingshot's finished with intelligence briefs on everyone heading out. Silverbolt's flying sorties with Air Raid," continues Fireflight, "and Skydive's helping Swoop with air maneuvers."
"Then why...?" Leader One begins to ask; he trails off as Fireflight turns to face the Guardian leader.
"Sludge was there first," answers Fireflight. "Also, he and Snarl know symbolic languages--they're fluent in Hika-go; folklore, and Earth history. Swoop's really, really smart; between him and Sludge, they can take care of science and math."
Leader One's jaw drops.
"Grimlock can analyze a situation quickly," continues Fireflight, "and all five Dinobots are adaptable. You can drop them anywhere in the universe, and they'll pull through."
"Are you serious?" Leader One's optics widen at Fireflight's information dump. "Optimus wasn't able to rationalize any of this to Turbo."
"Optimus hasn't observed half of this," says Fireflight, "but he knows the Dinobots are a good team, and he trusts them to get the job done. Besides," the Autobot jetwarrior adds, "the Dinobots can break the communication barrier that tripped you guys up the first time. We can't."
"Why not?" asks Leader One.
"Silverbolt and Air Raid wouldn't take the natives seriously, and Skydive would hit a mental block at the natives' primitive lifestyle and speech; I'd fly off on tangents about the environment, the wildlife, or the people. Slingshot, meanwhile," continues Fireflight, "...is fragging Slingshot: he'd be even less likely to listen to some bearded old man ranting like a biblical prophet."
"Less likely than I would, you mean," says Leader One with a wry smile.
"Yep." Fireflight returns to his work on Teletraan.
Scene: 6
Optimus contacts Skywarp. "Have you picked your partner for this mission yet?" he asks the Decepticon.
"Yeah," says Skywarp. "I had him picked the moment Megatron gave the order."
"Please listen. Neither of us like surprises," says Optimus. "Which one of your cohorts will we be dealing with?"
Skywarp snickers at Optimus. "The only one alive I trust to help me with this mission," he answers, giving Optimus a thin smile as he traces his left ring knuckle.
"Skyfire is experienced with exploration," notes Optimus.
"I owe it to Small Foot, and to her memory," says Skywarp, "to avoid traitorous frags. I already have to work with you, after all."
Optimus glowers at Skywarp. "There's always Soundwave, if you truly want to honor her memory," he states.
"Look, Prime: we need you alive for this fragging mission," grins Skywarp crudely. "I've made my choice, and you'll meet him when we head out. Cheerios." Skywarp ends the transmission.
Optimus rolls his optics. "It's 'cheeri-o', not the breakfast cereal!"
Scene: 7
In his quarters at Deceptibase, Starscream reads Slingshot's intelligence brief on himself.
"It's so dry," muses Starscream aloud as he continues reading. "'Age: 10.2 M-cycles.'" Starscream rolls his optics. "'Top-level graduate of the Cybertron War Academy. Air Unit Commander of Six Sigma squadron Stars of Heaven, classification: Tier One.'"
Starscream preens, looking at his old Academy livery. "Can't take this with me."
Starscream resumes reading his own brief. "'Former member of the Cybertron Exploratory Science Symposium (C-ExSS).' Until I was drummed out after Skyfire crash-landed on this rock. Should have left the bastard in Antartica."
He continues to read his brief. "'Clan history: Diasporan Arwing Class Five Faust, modified to Class One during the Second War.' In honor of the original Arwing, who died in that conflict! There's no damned context!" Starscream spits. "Slingshot's after-action reports must be even more dull."
Starscream shakes his head. "'Creator: Lucifer. Brother: Sunstorm.' How did he learn that? Almost no one connects me with that living EMP generator."
He continues reading. "'Personality analysis.' Ah, finally: some real commentary. Even his inane insults would be refreshing at this point. 'Starscream's sense of personal entitlement is out of proportion to his abilities.' Is Slingshot referring to me or himself?" Starscream scoffs.
The jetwarrior laughs as he continues reading. "'Adaptive and resourceful when presented with limited resources.' In my line of work, I have to be."
Starscream grins. "Now it gets interesting. 'Current rank: Air Commander, Decepticon Battle Fleet. Air Unit Commander of Twin-Trine squadron Seekers of Vilnacron, wing commander of primary trine Angels of Destruction. Reports to: Megatron, Supreme Decepticon Commander.' If we are ever to win this damned war, this obnoxious fact must change," he mutters.
"'Weaponry: standard issue Class One forearm rifle (2), rectifier special: systems nullification ray.' So...boring!" Starscream rants.
"Ah," Starscream continues, "there's a recommendation for 'Field Leader'. Yes; let's see what Slingshot's advice to my dim-witted Field Leader is. 'Recommendation: Utilize Starscream's analytical abilities fully. Send him on exploratory runs with either Guardian Road Ranger (KUWARI Kazuki) or Guardian Pumper (KAWASHIMA Jurougorou).' As though I care about their real names."
"Hmm," Starscream muses as he continues reading. "'Avoid extended contact with Governor General Leader One (native Gobotron name unknown), Lieutenant Senior Turbo (SHICHIGOROU Taichirou), or Autobot Commander Optimus Prime.' Why--oh, wait. Slingshot's listed some stupid reasons: 'Leader One's temperament is too similar to Starscream's, and the clash of egos will be detrimental to the mission. Turbo's temperament is highly bellicose, and he tends to bottle his emotions until they are poked by obnoxious remarks. Starscream goads others on a regular basis; in Turbo's current emotional distress, Starscream may not survive.' Oh, give me some credit! I have to deal with Megatron's tantrums--I think I can handle whatever Turbo can throw at me."
Starscream sighs. "Alright, I must admit that this crossed my mind: 'Starscream will attempt to terminate Optimus Prime in a bid to replace Megatron as Supreme Decepticon Commander.'"
"The end at last," says Starscream. "'Conclusion: Starscream is a valuable, yet problematic asset to the mission. End report: Aerial Ground Troop Support Specialist C-53.' Which iteration are you?" he demands. "Slingshot obviously knows military report formatting protocol; he's supposed to identify which iteration he is. Given his chronological age, he's probably Mark 18."
Skywarp enters Starscream's quarters.
"Then again," continues Starscream, "The Autobots only have about four thousand Arwings, and most of them are Two-As."
"Also," says Skywarp, "Autobots don't bother with iteration marks in their after-action reports; most of their reports aren't even in military format."
Starscream notes Skywarp. "How would you know that?" he asks Skywarp.
"Sometimes I have to read whatever Ravage or Laserbeak ganked from the Autobots, whenever Soundwave pulls me from our trine for RECoN duty." Skywarp chuckles. "Did you read mine yet?"
"I have no interest in reading another dull missive from Slingshot," says Starscream. "I've been more entertained reading galactic traffic reports." Starscream packs away the intelligence brief.
"I see you're almost ready," says Skywarp. "I just want to clear up a few things."
"Skywarp." Starscream holds up a hand to halt Skywarp's spiel. "I'd like you to spare me any threats, denunciations, or attacks on my personal character."
Skywarp snorts at Starscream, but lets his wingleader speak.
"What do I possibly have to gain from betraying you?" Starscream asks.
Skywarp stops Starscream. "Please remember: I'm the stupid one. That means I don't have time for any multi-tiered schemes connected to your slagging objective that interfere with this mission."
Starscream winces. "I'm hurt that you'd think so ill of me," he says. "If you can't trust me on this, then why consult me in the first place?"
"Really?" Skywarp stares at Starscream. "You're asking me why I'm taking you?"
"I can't believe this. Megatron put you in charge. You." Starscream shakes his head. "Since I must submit to your command for this mission, I'd like to know your reasoning."
Skywarp laughs. "Who do you think I should take?" he asks, grinning.
Starscream begins. "Soundwave is an astute scientific mind. Ramjet is highly capable. Finally, Thundercracker is your damned sidekick--whenever you're not his."
"So?" scoffs Skywarp.
Starscream folds his arms. "You'd prefer any of them for company over me on--based on my assessment of Leader One's report--a backwater world so primitive it makes Earth look like Cybertron."
"Go on," says Skywarp.
"Also," continues Starscream, "Skyfire is--objectively--the best explorer; his treason aside: Skyfire's scientific knowledge and skill, along with his affinity toward organics, would ensure the mission's success."
"You want me to go alone, the sole Decepticon among a bunch of Autobots?" Skywarp gawks at Starscream. "Including Optimus fraggin' Prime?"
"It's not what I want," says Starscream. "I actually am thinking about what's best for this mission. If I were in charge," he continues, "and Megatron stuck me with just one choice, I'd take either Skyfire or Soundwave: I've worked with both of them before."
Skywarp studies Starscream.
"Given your personality," Starscream continues, "your natural complement is Thundercracker. If I imagine myself as you, I'd take either said natural complement or Ramjet."
Skywarp sighs, then snickers. "That was predictable...and wrong."
"What?" balks Starscream.
"You can work with anybody toward a goal, Starscream," says Skywarp, "because you're smart, resourceful, and adaptive. Personality obstacles don't exist to you because you just don't give a damn about other egos."
"Is that why you think I can safely work with the 'bellicose' Turbo?" asks Starscream.
"Slingshot has no fragging command experience; you can work with Turbo just fine," says Skywarp. "You could probably figure out how to escape his kill zone if it comes to that--you've survived worse."
"More than you know." Starscream grins. "I still don't know why my choices are wrong."
"You don't realize that I'm not a smart guy," says Skywarp.
Starscream raises an optic ridge.
"I need everything laid out for me," Skywarp continues. "I can't deal with fraggers who's motives I don't understand and who I can't control."
"Control...?" Starscream laughs.
"Yeah. Let's look at your choices: I couldn't work with someone as serious as fraggin' Ramjet. He's capable, but he's no science geek like you. He also has no personality in or out of after-action reports," Skywarp continues. "Slingshot, by comparison, only keeps his personality out of his reports."
Starscream nods, waiting for Skywarp to continue.
"Soundwave is very hard to work with, because nobody can really command the guy." Skywarp continues, "Not even Megatron.""Soundwave kisses Megatron's aft all the time!" counters Starscream. "It's 'As you command, Megatron' this, 'Megatron must be informed' that!"
"Right. When you get a questionable order from Megatron," says Skywarp, "you immediately point out all the flaws in his fraggin' logic and piss him off. When Soundwave gets that kind of order," he continues, "he does one of two things. If the order is sound and there are just a few holes, he'll say something like 'Order received, Megatron'. Once Megatron leaves, we end up obeying Soundwave's orders instead."
"But if it's doomed to fail...?" asks Starscream.
"Like this Devilspawn scrap," says Skywarp. "Soundwave knew I was right the whole time."
Starscream nods. "As did I," he says. "We've already lost Capricorn--a veteran soldier--to Megatron's retarded tunnel vision."
"And you would have basically repeated what I said," says Skywarp.
"Of course. You may not be bright, but you can at least read basic summaries." Starscream shakes his head.
"Anyway," continues Skywarp, "Soundwave took total control of everything the moment I handed him the data drive. His thought process was: 'Megatron wants to control the Devilspawn. Any efforts to dissuade him from this will prove fruitless. He must be made to realize that he is wrong. Megatron will demand more proof. Also, I suspect that one of the Aerialbots is actually a stray Decepticon; I must flush him out.'"
"Wait--what?" Starscream holds up a hand to stop Skywarp. "What does that have to do with anything?"
"Soundwave's got ten plans running at once, and some of them work out better if a bad plan of Megatron's plays out as Megatron wants. In this case, Capricorn had to die to confirm a fact for Soundwave."
"Did he flush out the Aerialbot?" asks Starscream.
"Yeah. But do you understand now why I can't work with Soundwave? He'd take over my mission to weave it into his fraggin' master plan." Skywarp scowls. "It'll help the Cause, but at the cost of the mission: which I can't afford, because I'm stupid and relatively expendable--keep that in mind."
"What about Skyfire?" Starscream asks.
"If this were your mission," says Skywarp, "then yeah: you'd go it alone and harangue Skyfrag the whole way through."
"But it's your mission," says Starscream.
"That's right. You could push Skyfire to see things your way; I can't." Skywarp notes a holoimage of Starscream and Skyfire outside the C-ExSS building. "If I have to get rough with the natives to get the job done," continues Skywarp, "that idiot might try to stop me the way he defied you that day; I have no backup to get his other Autobot friends or the Guardians to see things my way."
"Especially since the primary reason for your involvement is because of Small Foot," notes Starscream.
"Can't deny that." Skywarp shrugs, a hard look in his optics. "She's pretty damn special."
"I thought so." Starscream smiles thoughtfully. "I've seen that look in your optics before. You even took a shot from Megatron to prove your point."
"What do you think my point is?" Skywarp asks.
Starscream snorts. "It's quite obvious: 'Don't trifle with me, Starscream. If you do anything--planned or not--to screw with me, I'm authorized to deal with you. When I get through with you, then if you survive, you'll wish you were dead.' Is that about right?" he asks with a smirk.
"Precisely." Skywarp smiles thinly. "As far as Thundercracker," he continues, "his High-and-Mightiness is right where I need him to be."
"That's cold, Skywarp." Starscream's optics widen in shock. "You two normally work so well together. Ah, well," he continues, "It's in the best interests of the mission. I must defer to your judgment."
"Good. I know I made the right decision," says Skywarp. "Guess you'd better finish packing: we'll be there for a while." Skywarp leaves.
Starscream grabs an item off his nightstand: a portrait of himself and the Stars of Heaven in formal War Academy livery. "I can't take the old livery," he muses aloud, "but I do take perfect holoimages."
Starscream tosses the portrait into his bag with the rest of his equipment, subspaces the bag, then leaves his quarters.
Scene: 8
Skywarp and Starscream leave Deceptibase, transforming to their alt modes.
Thundercracker follows suit. "So, where are we headed?" he asks as he catches up with his trine-mates.
"We are headed--*" begins Starscream.
Skywarp cuts him off. "Starscream, head to the rendezvous point," he orders.
Starscream sighs, then complies with Skywarp's command.
Skywarp transforms and lands.
Thundercracker does likewise, then stares at his wingmate and friend. "What was that about?" he asks.
"I gave you your orders," says Skywarp in a curt tone.
"That I know: spacebridge duty. I think there might be a mistake," says Thundercracker.
"You're not authorized to think, Thundercracker." Skywarp glares at Thundercracker. "I will repeat myself once: Starscream and I are going on the mission; you are on spacebridge detail until I give further notice. Is that understood?"
Thundercracker scowls at Skywarp. "I understand, and I read your order," he says. "I just disagree."
"I don't need you on this mission," says Skywarp, "and you won't question my orders."
"How dare you?" Thundercracker snarls. "You'd take Starscream over me? We've flown together from the start of our Academy days!"
Skywarp snickers. "That's why, chief. For this mission, you're worthless to me."
"Starscream's worth even less than that, then," counters Thundercracker. "Just in case it skipped your memory banks, Starscream has tried to frag us over numerous times."
"So? Screamer's scrap ain't nothing personal against us, or new." Skywarp rolls his optics. "I've already settled things with him. Now," he continues, "obey my orders."
"Not without an explanation," counters Thundercracker.
Skywarp backhands Thundercracker. "I told you that you won't question me."
"You defied Megatron to his face and are lucky to be alive," says Thundercracker. "I'm within my rights as your wingmate to question your judgment," he continues with a sneer, "Small Foot be damned."
Skywarp smiles. "Fine. I know that you're too blinkered to figure out the reason for my orders on your own."
"Excuse me?" balks Thundercracker.
"You're not excused, oh scion of Arwing the Valiant," says Skywarp mockingly. "To be blunt," he continues, "this mission is way out of your league."
"This mission is out of your league," says Thundercracker. "Megatron's just giving you enough drop cable to hang yourself and twist in the wind."
"I don't care. Megatron gave me the mission," says Skywarp, "and I will carry it out."
"Why Starscream?" asks Thundercracker.
Skywarp shakes his head. "Sorry to pop your elitist bubble, old chum," he grins, "but there's the simple fact that you're not as magnificent as you think you are."
Thundercracker leans his head to one side.
"Remember that mission in South America, when Megatron had that weapon you and Starscream failed to guard?"
"That was several cycles ago, Skywarp! I was just trying to take Starscream down a peg," Thundercracker continues, "and Skyfire was just a tool for that purpose."
Skywarp places a hand on Thundercracker's shoulder. "Relax. If I thought you wanted to outright stab Screamer in the back," says Skywarp, "you wouldn't be standing before me making uninformed demands."
"I'd be dead," says Thundercracker, grinning. "So why dredge that up at all?"
"Still don't get it." Skywarp shakes his head. "You're not smart enough for this mission. Starscream is."
"What do you mean?" demands Thundercracker. "I was also a Tier I cadet back in the Academy."
"Yeah? You think that's supposed to impress me?" Skywarp scoffs. "It won't faze Ratchet or Perceptor, both of whom are smarter than you; then again, even some of the fraggin' Dinobots are smarter than you."
"Now you're just insulting me," scowls Thundercracker.
"You don't understand. Your vaunted Arwing noble title doesn't mean scrap," Skywarp continues, "and that 'I'm above you all' attitude of yours is only going to cause me grief."
"I don't trade on my title," says Thundercracker, "but on my own pride as a jetwarrior."
Skywarp laughs for several seconds.
"What's so funny?" asks Thundercracker.
"I needed a good laugh, Thunder; thanks." Skywarp grins. "You're out of your league, genius. I brought up the South America operation," he continues, "to get you to remember that you failed in your fraggin' double-cross on Starscream."
Thundercracker raises an optic ridge. "So?" he asks, pouting.
"Starscream is smarter than you. So are the Guardians," says Skywarp.
"They're smarter than you!" scoffs Thundercracker.
"That's why I'm taking Starscream. Your conceit is out of proportion to your intelligence," continues Skywarp, "and those five Gobots will ream you for it."
"Do you mean the brilliant Turbo?" asks Thundercracker. "If I want information on any ridiculous Earth video games," he continues, "I'll be sure to ask him."
"Turbo's one of the smartest Guardians, moron," counters Skywarp. "The Guardians are the smartest and most powerful Gobots on Gobotron. They will eviscerate a Decepticon team of you and me if we come at them the wrong way."
"Oh, come on!" Thundercracker snorts.
"They won't mind me," says Skywarp. "but you'll get pushy, and then Small Foot and Leader None will just sit you in the fraggin' dunce corner. 'Stand aside, fool: leave this matter to those of us who can actually think' will be their attitude."
"Starscream's the pushiest mech in our army," counters Thundercracker.
"But he has the brains and the skills to back him up: when we ditched his aft on Guadacanal," Skywarp continues, "he came back at us with a fraggin' gestalt."
"That gestalt team double-crossed Starscream and tried to send us into the sun," notes Thundercracker.
"And Screamer had a backup plan to disable said Bruticus. Of course," says Skywarp, "all six of them played into Soundwave's hands--but nobody can compete on Soundwave's intellectual level."
"Why not take Soundwave, then?" asks Thundercracker.
Skywarp stares at Thundercracker, annoyed. "Nobody's on Soundwave's level--especially not me. Starscream will at least telegraph his moves, so I can track him," Skywarp continues.
"Whereas Soundwave's too fraggin' cagey for you to work with," says Thundercracker.
"Bingo. At least I don't have to elaborate on that bastard again." Skywarp sighs.
Scene: 9
In Deceptibase's Intelligence Center, Soundwave monitors Skywarp and Thundercracker's conversation through an autoscout's live feed.
Frenzy grins. "Didn't you want that dumb fragger to take Starscream?" he asks.
"Factor known," states Soundwave. "Probabilty: ninety-nine point thirty-two percent."
"What about that spatial blob that Fireflight caught near the planet?" asks Rumble.
Soundwave nods. "Contact with Shockwave made. Confirmed nature of readings. Related to Prime," Soundwave continues.
"So?" Rumble asks.
Soundwave turns from the feed. "If Skywarp wants total control of the mission," he states in a perfect Skywarp cadence, "then he's got it."
Ravage chuckles; Soundwave pets him.
Frenzy shakes his head. "When will these fraggers learn that you're always in control, Boss?"
Scene: 10
Optimus, Ratchet, Perceptor, Trailbreaker, Hound, and the Dinobots stand with Ironhide and the handcuffed Braxis outside the Ark.
The Guardian shuttle lands in front of the group of Autobots; Road Ranger and Pumper exit the ship.
"Are you all ready?" asks Pumper.
"Just waiting on Skywarp and his partner," says Optimus.
Leader One, Turbo, and Small Foot emerge from the Ark with Anya, A. J., and Mrs. Newcastle.
"Are you sure you want to go, Mrs. Newcastle?" asks Ratchet. "This will be very dangerous."
"I know," Mrs. Newcastle sighs. "But I'll go crazy if I stay here, waiting."
"None of you have to go, ladies," says Turbo.
"The argument is closed," says Anya. "I'm a biologist; Dr. Braxis, while knowledgeable, is not."
"And I am going, period," adds A. J., folding her arms.
A US military helicopter arrives.
"Anita!" Major Newcastle says to Mrs. Newcastle as he jumps out just before it lands. Dewey and Raleigh climb out behind their father.
"Mama!" Raleigh runs to Anita, hugging her.
"Came to see me off?" Anita asks, smiling.
Raleigh nods, as does Dewey; the older Newcastle boy struggling with a large military green duffel bag.
"What's all that, Dewey?" asks Turbo, grinning.
"We're packed up for Grandma's," says Dewey.
"I see." Turbo looks up at the sky, noting Starscream and Skywarp. "Let's pack it in and roll out, as Optimus would say."
Optimus winces as he spots Starscream and Skywarp flying towards the Guardian shuttle. "I hate Skywarp. Put that on the record, Ironhide," he says.
"I've hated him for a while, Prime," says Ironhide.
"You think they'll catch up to the ship?" asks Pumper as he boards.
"We need to get going, now," says Turbo, grabbing Dr. Braxis and boarding the ship. "Say your good-byes, Mrs. Newcastle," he says to Anita, "and keep them short and sweet."
Optimus and Ratchet board the shuttle; Perceptor walks over to the crates behind the Dinobots.
Dewey takes Raleigh by the hand; they follow Perceptor.
"I can go with you," says Major Newcastle.
"No, Hughes. I'm a big girl," says Anita. "Take the boys to their grandma."
A. J. salutes Major Newcastle. "We'll protect her, sir," she says. "I promise you that."
"Take care of yourself, Corporal Foster. The general and I want to see you back at UNECOM." Major Newcastle nods, then turns to leave the group. "Boys, come on: back to the helicopter."
"We're coming, dad!" says Dewey. He and Raleigh return to the helicopter.
"That was oddly obedient of them," muses Leader One as he boards the ship with Anya, A. J., and Anita.
"Let's not question it," says Small Foot, boarding with Road Ranger.
"I don't know," muses Road Ranger, watching as Major Newcastle boards the helicopter. "They're both very smart boys."
The helicopter takes off, leaving for UNECOM.
Turbo stands at the door of the shuttle. "Come on, Dino-brothers! You and Percy need to get your afts in gear," he says.
Slag picks up Perceptor. "We am hearing you, Turbo," he grins, bringing Perceptor inside the shuttle.
"Put me down!" demands Perceptor. "Those instruments are highly delicate, and...."
The other Dinobots sigh in relief.
"Now we am carry equipment in peace," says Grimlock, carrying two crates.
"Us am go now; to get him Turbo off our afts," adds Sludge, shaking his head as he enters the shuttle with two crates.
"Why am Turbo in such a rush?" asks Swoop, also carrying crates into the ship.
Snarl shrugs. "Not sure." He grabs the last three crates and brings them into the shuttle.
Skywarp and Starscream transform and land; Starscream enters the shuttle.
"See you when I'm back, Auto-dope." Skywarp grins at Ironhide.
"I expect to see Prime back in one piece," says Ironhide.
Skywarp's smile hardens. "That's up to him, ain't it?" He boards the shuttle.
The Guardian shuttle takes off. Ironhide scowls. Be careful, Optimus....
Scene: 11
The helicopter lands back at UNECOM headquarters. Major Newcastle and the pilot exit the craft, meeting a worried General Newcastle.
"Have you seen the boys, Hughes?" asks General Newcastle.
"Yes," says Major Newcastle. "They came with me to see Anita off. They were packed to head to her mother's house," the major continues, "but Dewey had so much stuff."
General Newcastle stares at his son, smiling in resignation. "Where are he and Raleigh now?" he asks blandly.
"Probably still inside the heli." Major Newcastle and General Newcastle both approach the helicopter. "Come on, boys: your granddad's worried," he grins.
The two boys fail to exit the helicopter.
"I'll go in," says the pilot. "Those two rascals are probably hiding."
General Newcastle shakes his head, turning to enter UNECOM. "We'll need to contact Leader One before their shuttle leaves our solar system," he says.
"Why?" asks Major Newcastle.
"Because those two sure as hell aren't on that helicopter." General Newcastle enters the UNECOM building.
They wouldn't.... "Dewey?" says Major Newcastle, boarding the helicopter. "Raleigh? Don't play around...."
"They aren't on the chopper," says the pilot, fiddling with an electronic device.
"What's that?" asks Major Newcastle.
Scooter runs to the helicopter. "My spare power chip's missing," he says. "I checked the security cameras and...." Scooter notes the pilot with the device.
"What?" ask both the pilot and Major Newcastle.
Scooter transforms. "Hop on; we'll need to get you to the comm center at UNECOM before the shuttle hits hyperdrive."
Scene: 12
"I'm getting crumbs of crushed grains and...bits of a solid milk-and-oil emulsion all over me!" whines Starscream.
"Cheese and crackers," says Turbo in a matter-of-fact tone. "We're already in hyperdrive, and should be punching through the Kuiper Belt in about fifteen seconds."
"Is your ship infested with rats?" Starscream asks.
"Only the big pair with the Decepticon logos," says Ratchet.
"Frag off, Doc," says Skywarp. "I've detected an extra pair of human life signs."
"...got to pee," hisses a small young voice in an attempt to whisper.
"Is...that Raleigh?" asks Leader One.
"If it is," says Starscream to Anita, "then order him to hold his urine. I will not stand the--no!" Starscream shudders at Raleigh as the boy finishes relieving himself on Starscream's leg."
"I'm sorry," says Raleigh. "I had to go."
"That's okay, runt," grins Skywarp. "Mr. Starscream doesn't mind being a makeshift tree for you."
Starscream scowls at Skywarp, then at Raleigh, and finally at Turbo. "Help the brat and his brother locate a restroom," he says. "This is the last time I shall allow such humiliation."
"You can come out now, Dewey," says Road Ranger, hand on his forehead.
Dewey emerges from their hiding spot, pouting as he pulls out a roll of paper towels and wipes Raleigh's urine.
"You do know you're grounded when we return," says Anita, glaring at Dewey.
"I understand, Mama," says Dewey.
Pumper enters the main body of the shuttle. "General Newcastle's on the line. Can we turn back and return the boys?" he asks.
"We're already through the Kuiper Belt, aren't we?" asks Turbo.
"Yeah," says Pumper.
"And we're still in hyperdrive?" Turbo asks.
Pumper nods.
Turbo laughs.
"This isn't funny," says Leader One.
"We ain't turning back," says Skywarp.
"It am okay," says Sludge, dropping to his haunches and facing Dewey. "You Dewey and him Raleigh am want to help, right?"
"We're the men of the house when Dad's away," says Dewey. "Mama's hurt, and we want to help her."
"It's extremely hazardous to have children here," says Perceptor.
"So what?" grins Skywarp. "You Autobots are child endangerment experts."
"I'm almost five," says Raleigh. "I'm older than the Dinobots.""Dinobots am created in Earth year 1984," says Grimlock.
"Raleigh am born in 1983," says Swoop. "Him am older than Dinobots."
"Him Raleigh and him Dewey am human children. Us am robots," says Slag. "Have to take human children back."
"No," says Sludge, looking through Dewey's duffel bag. "Am too late now. Let them stay."
"Sludge is right; unfortunately, we can't turn this shuttle on a dime," says Leader One.
"This is why you were trying to hustle our afts onto the shuttle, isn't it?" asks Optimus.
"Yep." Turbo shakes his head, then pouts at Dewey and Raleigh. "They're really sneaky."
"Then the smaller whelp should have purged his bladder before he left," says Starscream. "Preferably on an Autobot."
Scene: 13
Fireflight reenters Autobot Headquarters, where Slingshot paces angrily near Teletraan One.
"I need to get there, Slingshot," says Fireflight. "I did promise to have that map ready for Leader One and the others when they reached the planet."
"Leader One ain't the leader of this outfit!" spits Slingshot. "Let him wait."
"So we're going to disobey direct orders from Silverbolt and Optimus Prime?" asks Fireflight as he sits at Teletraan.
Slingshot sits next to him. "No. I don't know who Silverbolt's trying to fool though: he talked all tough to us," he continues, patching his targeting computer to Teletraan, "but I know he's shaking like a fraggin' blender up there."
"If Silverbolt says he'll be okay," says Fireflight, "then he'll be okay. He reamed me up there."
"With your stupid attempt at improv, no wonder Silverbolt's mad," grins Slingshot. "We ain't his nursemaids, you know."
Fireflight sighs while resuming work on his map. "That's how I made it sound, I guess," he says.
"An 'implied order from Optimus'. I ought to hit you for that, since Silverbolt won't," says Slingshot.
"If Silverbolt hit us every time we said or did something stupid," says Fireflight, "our whole unit would only see the inside of med bay."
"Don't even mention med bay to me," scoffs Slingshot.
"You have a permanent berth in there," Fireflight quips, "primarily because you take on more than you can handle alone."
"I can handle a lot more than you give me credit for," counters Slingshot.
"You were about to try to do my job," says Fireflight. "The whole reason we're doing all of this is to keep you from wrecking yourself."
"Yeah, I know: 'we're a team; we're supposed to work together'." Slingshot shakes his head.
"Yes. We are," says Fireflight, scowling. "If you had worked on this alone," he continues, "you would have overtaxed your systems trying to map an uncharted planet with your pitiful flight range and mediocre visual sensors."
"Hey--I get the job done," says Slingshot.
"I know. Optimus appreciates your hard work," says Fireflight. "We're helping you get more done by working smart."
"...I got nothing." Slingshot smirks.
"That's right: I'm lecturing you on working smart." Fireflight returns the smirk. "At some point, you'll have to actually trust us."
Slingshot winces. "I do trust you guys," he says.
"Uh-huh. That's why you switched our duty rosters," says Fireflight.
"No; this is my routine shift," says Slingshot. "I honestly didn't know you were taking over my monitor duty shift to work on your map."
"You could have asked," says Fireflight.
"You're right," Slingshot admits. "Then Leader One wouldn't have poleaxed me with 'Where's Fireflight?' The fragger was trying to take over Prime's job."
"He thinks he can do a better job at being the leader of the Autobots than the actual leader of the Autobots," says Fireflight.
Slingshot hits his chair's armrest. "Leader One was stepping all over Prime's cable!" he spits. "Where does he get off?"
Fireflight stares at Slingshot. "This from the worst offender in our unit for stepping all over commanders' input cables," he notes wryly.
"Ah, that's Silverbolt," says Slinghshot, "though I sometimes do question Prime's orders."
"Sometimes?" Fireflight hits Slingshot on the back of his head. "On day one of landing on Earth, you were giving our command element grief. You thought Prime was stupid."
"At times I still think Prime's kind of stupid. Anyway," continues Slingshot, "most of that scrap was stasis fog."
"Including flying right into a Decepticon trap designed to kill us?" asks Fireflight.
"No; that was me being a fraggin' idiot combined with stasis fog," says Slingshot. "Why'd you guys follow me anyway--I thought Silverbolt was our leader."
"We were all suffering from the same bout of stupid," grins Fireflight. "Really, though: we just thought that jetwarriors shared common ground--or sky, as it were."
"We got a rude wake-up call on that front." Slingshot grins ruefully. "They're going to regret crossing me."
"Careful, buddy: you're channeling Starscream a bit there," says Fireflight.
Slingshot shudders. "Thanks for the warning, Flight," he says.
"The map's about done," says Fireflight.
"Yeah. I notice that you spotted this weird blob that's orbiting it," says Slingshot.
"That's a spatial anomaly. I'm not sure what it is," Fireflight continues, "but it's there, and I want to make sure it's accounted for."
"Optimus does hate surprises. I'll help you get a better bead on that anomaly," continues Slingshot. "I think it's either a cloaked ship or some kind of interdimensional field."
"Do you think the Renegades might be causing all of this?" asks Fireflight.
"You're thinking too hard about the cloak," says Slingshot. "Besides, Cy-Kill loves Gobotron--he'd never do anything to endanger it."
Fireflight stares at Slingshot.
"Yeah; I had a chat with both Renegade faction leaders," Slingshot continues. "We are fellow 'subversives', after all. Optimus wanted to figure out what Cyk and Zero's opinion of Megatron was."
"What did you find out?" asks Fireflight.
Slingshot laughs. "Stuff. Just...stuff."
Fireflight smiles. "Silverbolt's right: you are cute when you laugh."
Slingshot stares at Fireflight, blushing slightly. "Let me just tell you before I change my mind."
Scene: 14
Alone, Slingshot followed Water Walk to Rogue Star. Undetected, Slingshot entered the base.
Hn...it's kind of dark, Slingshot noted to himself. I'll have to be careful.
The lights flooded on, and Slingshot was surrounded by Gobots from both Renegade factions: Bike Hero and Wing Zero.
"Welcome, Slingshot," smiled Cy-Kill. "We've been expecting you."
"How?" demanded Slingshot. "There's no way you goons could track me."
"True; you're quite skilled," said Zero. "However, this fellow following you is not nearly as skilled," he added as Stinger and Vamp revealed a captured Air Raid.
"What the hell are you doing here?" said Slingshot to Air Raid.
"I saw you sneaking off somewhere, and I was bored," grinned Air Raid, "so I followed you."
"You tipped these fraggers off, you moron," spat Slingshot. "I was on a mission."
"What kind of mission?" asked Cy-Kill.
Slingshot scoffed at the Renegade leader. "Like I'm telling you, Cycle," he quipped.
Crasher groaned. "That wasn't even clever. Turbo used that one three M-cycles ago," she said.
"We have numerous means to make you talk, handsome," added Snoop.
"Yeah, I get it--interrogation. Fine. Do what you have to do to me as an intruder," continued Slingshot, "but could you let him go? Air Raid ain't got nothing to do with this, and you sure as slag won't get any intel out of him."
"Leave our Hornhead out of this," pouted Air Raid.
"We shall be the judge of this," said Zero.
"Furthermore," added Fitor, "both of you are intruders, and you both are now our prisoners."
"Not prisoners, Fitor," said Cy-Kill. "As subversives themselves, these two Autobots are potential allies."
"Why would we be allies?" balked Air Raid. "We ain't like you."
"We have a common foe," answered Cy-Kill, turning to Slingshot. "Don't we?"
"I ain't sure what you mean," said Slingshot.
"Come now," said Cy-Kill cannily, "Optimus Prime wouldn't send you after us without a reason."
"If you sought to kill us," added Zero, "you could have done so quite easily. It wasn't idle flattery when I praised your skill."
"I was hoping to corner the leadership alone," said Slingshot, scowling at Air Raid. "But you're right: I'm just here to talk."
The Renegades remained silent, watching Slingshot.
"Let's clear the air between us," Slingshot continued, "subversives to subversives."
"You have questions for us, then," said Zero.
Slingshot nodded. "Are you pursuing an alliance with the Decepticons?" he asked.
Zero's optics widened; Cy-Kill's optics narrowed.
"Autobot Intelligence has spotted Crasher, Snoop, and Soundwave chatting about it," Slingshot continued, "so we're concerned."
"Why would Soundwave do this?" asked Fitor. "Allying with us would rescind the non-aggression treaty between Cybertron and Gobotron."
"Between the Decepticons and Gobotron, exactly," grinned Slingshot. "You were a Guardian too, Fitor; so you're still stuck on the 'legal' ruling body business."
Fitor snickered. "You are correct. Your abilities are wasted with the Autobots."
"Hey--his abilities fit in perfect with us!" countered Air Raid. "You're worse than Leader One."
"Fighty, Leader One, and Cy-Kill were the Three Guardian Musketeers," grinned Crasher. "That's why I was surprised when Fitor joined us along with Cy-Kill."
"Be that as it may," said Cy-Kill, glaring at Crasher, "I must indeed clear out this foul misconception."
"Oh, what did I do wrong?" asked Crasher.
"You imbecile!" spat Cy-Kill. "Having Megatron as an ally? It would undermine all of our objectives."
"Wouldn't having Megatron's massive army make it easy for us to take over Gobotron?" asked Cop-tur.
Zero scowled at Cop-tur. "Are we so weak and spineless," he said, "that we would bend the knee to Megatron as simpering vassals?"
"Besides," added Cy-Kill, "we are the champions of the people, Cop-tur. No one wants to be ruled by some thug who blew up our ancestral sun."
"I did point that out," said Crasher, hanging her head low, "in my paltry defense."
"It's all right," said Cy-Kill. "I must remember that some of us lack imagination and vision."
"No." Zero turned to Cy-Kill. "Her actions are borne of frustration with your lack of results, Cy-Kill."
"It's like Megatron and Starscream all over again!" grinned Air Raid.
"Don't you dare to lump us in with Megatron!" shout the two Renegade leaders in unison.
"What about Starscream?" asked Slingshot.
"I am a jetwarrior," said Zero, "so that error is understandable."
"And Starscream is a worthy intellect," added Cy-Kill. "Now, to the business at hand."
The Renegades turn to Cy-Kill.
"We are not interested in an alliance with the Decepticons. As Gobots ourselves, that would be high treason against our beloved homeworld," continued Cy-Kill, "and my loyalty to Gobotron is absolute."
"Aren't you trying to take over your 'beloved' homeworld?" asked Air Raid.
"I am inaugurating a grand revolution," said Cy-Kill, making dramatic gestures. "Our goal is to bring true prosperity and peace to Gobotron; we are not the vagabonds that the Guardians claimed us to be."
"You ain't blowing smoke up my aft?" asked Slingshot, bemused with Cy-Kill's theatrics.
"I speak the truth," Cy-Kill smiled. "Enough of this! Begone."
"Release Air Raid," added Zero calmly to Stinger and Vamp.
"You be nice, Vampy," said Air Raid, winking as he rejoined Slingshot, "and I'll hook you up with one of the Insecticons."
"Yech! They're not my type," said Vamp, shuddering.
"Air Raid, let's just get out of here before the Guardians storm the place again," said Slingshot. "We don't need Leader One jumping to conclusions."
The two Aerialbots left Rogue Star. The troops of Bike Hero left to board Thruster One, while the Wing Zero group boarded Thruster Rei.
"Yukimaru," Zero stopped Cy-Kill. "Is it possible for you to speak the truth?"
"No lies were spoken...Surinain," answered Cy-Kill. "Again: my loyalty to Gobotron is absolute." Cy-Kill boarded Thruster One.
Zero boarded Thruster Rei. We shall see.
Scene: 15
The Guardian shuttle lands on the planet, and the Guardians, Autobots, Decepticons, and humans all disembark from the craft.
Moelgru and the village headman greet them.
"The Seer expected that you'd be back," grunts the headman.
"Indeed," states Optimus. "Have you had any further problems with the Devilspawn?"
"Not since the last," says the headman.
Moelgru gazes at the ground, holding several books and a letter.
Small Foot notices Moelgru's subdued expression. "Hello, Moelgru," she says, grinning. "It's me, that stubborn wench."
Skywarp chuckles. "She had you pegged, eh?" he asks.
Small Foot turns to Skywarp. "Stay out of this, you clown," she says.
Moelgru looks up at Small Foot and Skywarp. "This is from the Seer," she says quietly, presenting the letter. "Do any of you know an 'Elisha'?" she continues. "It's supposed to go to that person."
Turbo unlocks Braxis' handcuffs. "Not off the top of my head," he says.
"I know a girl in my class with that name," says Dewey, "but I don't think it's for her."
"No one in our party is named 'Eli--*'", begins Leader One.
"Give it to Dr. Braxis," says Anita.
"His first name is Renard," counters Turbo quizzically.
Braxis turns to Moelgru, ignoring Turbo. "Was it addressed 'from Elijah to Elisha'?" he asks the alien woman.
Moelgru nods.
"Then Mrs. Newcastle is correct, Turbo," says Braxis. "It is addressed to me. Dr. Edelstein would often refer to me as 'Elisha'," he continues, "as it was a biblical reference and an old in-joke regarding his remedial English class.""Elisha was the prophet Elijah's successor," adds Anita.
"Which means that our 'Elijah'--that is, Dr. Edelstein, the Seer...is dead." Braxis gives his group a thin smile.
Scene: 16
The party assembles in front of the Seer's cabin.
"According to the villagers," says Road Ranger, "the Devilspawn killed him two weeks ago."
"Where are his remains?" asks Optimus. "His next of kin will need to be notified."
"Oddly enough," says Turbo, "underneath the cabin. The men of the village put his corpse in an icebox there after cleaning it with Deathwater--to make sure no blood was on it."
"Why bother?" asks Skywarp. "I don't notice any shrines or grave markers around."
"No religious iconography anywhere," adds Starscream.
"Them no have religion," says Snarl. "No am have history of gods."
"Not quite true," says Road Ranger. "There is the N'vabu Rim legend. The villagers here dismiss it as an old folk tale," he continues, "but their lifestyle is based on his teachings, which are practiced in the next village over."
"Another village?" asks Leader One.
"Yes. It split off from this one fifteen generations ago," says Road Ranger.
"It's only a day's journey," Small Foot adds, "and they have more people, supplies, and food."
"Then why doesn't this dying pack of seventy-five people just move to the bigger village?" asks Skywarp.
Small Foot rolls her optics. "The headman won't allow it," she says. "It's run by a council of women."
"So what?" balks Skywarp. "Are the women malfunctioning?"
Anya smiles. "Nyet, though the village headman seems to think so," she says.
"We're still working that out ourselves," A. J. adds. "You're right to be confused."
"That other village may have a way to purge the Devilspawn without drinking the Deathwater," says Ratchet. "The reason the women can't have kids anymore is because they're imbibing that scrap to kill the Devilspawn in their bodies."
"And the Deathwater is scrambling their eggs," adds Anya.
"So I was right not to drink it," says Small Foot.
"But you're damned whether you do or don't," says Skywarp. "I don't appreciate this worm knocking you up."
A. J. tenses her fists. "We appreciate it even less," she says.
"I'm frankly amazed that it's not already an epidemic on Earth," says Braxis. "It would be pandemonium."
"'Peril unspeakable'," says Pumper. "That's how your old professor put it."
Braxis sighs. "And rightly so: humankind would destroy itself."
"You're a pessimist when it comes to your own species, Braxis," counters Turbo. "The human race has survived the Black Plague, eradicated smallpox, and even the HIV virus isn't going to put a dent in a population of over five billion."
"None of those diseases--a bacterium and two viruses, by the way--are going to stomp our mating urges flat," scoffs Braxis. "Our so-called 'venereal' germs sure as hell didn't."
"We're not dealing with viruses or bacteria, Doctor," says Anya, "but with alien sperm performing its natural function."
"That is why the Book of Revelation would have been rendered a whimsical fairy tale," says Braxis, "had the Devilspawn ever reached the wider population."
"Right now, it's only our problem," says A. J., frowning.
"We need to help our host village solve this problem," says Leader One. "The village headman must realize that the key is for the villagers to cooperate with their neighbors."
Scene: 17
Turbo watches Braxis as the scientist studies a journal.
"You seem out of your element, Doc," says Turbo after a moment.
Braxis lowers the journal. "If someone you admired, someone influential in your life died," he says, "you'd be out of your element as well, I imagine."
"Why was a science professor teaching remedial English?" Turbo asks.
"Oh, that was a new concept during the 1950s," says Braxis. "There were some really smart but poor students who grew up in backward towns; most of them had to quit grade school to work on the farm. There was one character," Braxis continues, "who was on parole and wanted to turn his life around."
"Did he succeed?" asks Turbo.
Braxis nods. "He became a Baptist minister and handles prison outreach. That fellow's actually not far from UNECOM," he says.
"Earth's a small world," says Turbo.
"If you start singing that Disney song," says Braxis, "you may as well kill me now; I will definitely attempt to flee."
"Like you've groused throughout our trip here: where will you go?" Turbo grins.
"Right now?" Braxis scowls. "Nowhere. Not until I find out who's responsible for Dr. Edelstein's murder--not to mention the suffering of these people."
"Optimus' theory is that this may be a post-apocalyptic world," says Turbo.
"Optimus mocks the word 'theory' with that claptrap," scoffs Braxis. "The village here hasn't even learned agriculture beyond their little vegetable garden. Our surface scans of this planet detected one area that could be called a city," he continues, "and even it's primitive."
"Then what do you think happened?" asks Turbo.
"What I think is based on Dr. Edelstein's observations over the past twenty-five years or so," says Braxis, opening the journal he was reading. "There's an image in here that may be familiar to you."
Turbo walks over to Braxis, then studies the drawing in the journal.
"That...it looks like...." Turbo stares at the drawing. "But how?" he asks. "Edelstein didn't have the tools to detect it."
"He had a radio transmitter, a slide rule, a compass," says Braxis, "and lots of free time."
"So, based on this," says Turbo, "what's your theory?"
"My best guess--I won't insult the word 'theory'--is that something is hiding inside that anomaly," says Braxis, pointing at the drawing. "The entity is aware of the Devilspawn," Braxis continues, "and is likely responsible for their presence on this planet."
Scene: 18
"Sludge," says Ratchet, "you're thinking about stuff."
"Uh-huh." Sludge sighs. "Village am need new blood, or it will die."
"That ain't no good." Ratchet grins. "How do we convince the guy in charge to make peace with the 'Women's Village'?"
"Them no am kidnap women from 'Women's Village' because of Eel-seen story," says Sludge, "so that am good start."
"Men in this village," says Slag, "am need to see women as the same as men."
"Not same," says Snarl. "Equal."
"Women am different," adds Swoop. "Men am need to treat women with same respect as men if village am to survive."
"Then me Grimlock say that us need to make men listen to women of host village and Women's Village," says Grimlock.
"No. No am use force," says Sludge. "Them forget once us leave and do same thing them do before."
"The kind of societal change you want to enforce takes generations to stick," adds Ratchet.
"If them want to live to have more generations," says Grimlock, "then headman and villagers will listen to us and to Women's Village."
Scene: 19
Skywarp and Starscream survey the area with Hound and Trailbreaker.
"How's the energy scene looking?" asks Skywarp.
"Great, actually," says Starscream. "Several nearby waterfalls, and I've even detected a natural gas and petroleum deposit."
"The gas and petroleum are off-limits to all of us," says Trailbreaker, giving the two Decepticons a look.
"That's alright," says Starscream. "With large enough wheels, we can use the waterfalls."
"One of the waterfalls already has a wheel on it," says Hound. "It belongs to the 'Women's Village'. They use it to mill grain."
"I know humans have strict social roles for their genders," says Starscream, "but even they know which side their bread is buttered, so to speak."
"In this planet's case," says Skywarp, "I think it's because of the Devilspawn. Something fragged around with this species' natural development eons ago."
"Prime says that this is the fallout from a post-apocalyptic cataclysm," says Trailbreaker.
"Prime's watched too many dumb Earth movies," scoffs Starscream. "Besides, even in Mad Max the humans had technology that they knew how to operate."
"What's your theory, then?" Trailbreaker asks.
"Hypothesis, you fool!" Starscream shakes his head. "We don't have enough information to form any theories."
Skywarp hits Starscream on the back of his head. "'Lay theory', frag-off," he says. "Most of us ain't science geeks."
"Fine!" Starscream scowls at Skywarp. "For you unenlightened rubes: my 'lay theory' is that there's a retrograde force that has held back this world's natural civilizational development."
"That sounds like Braxis' theory," says Skywarp, "except that he thinks it's hiding inside that spatial anomaly."
"Edelstein was able to triangulate its position in space based on the lights that clean the Deathwater deposits," says Starscream. "I, too, have read the journals."
"I'm just relieved to know that Deathwater pool is cleaned," says Skywarp. "If the villagers had to clean it themselves," he continues, "it would lose its effectiveness at killing Devilspawn."
"I say find out where the Devilspawn's breeding grounds are," says Hound, "then head over there with a tank filled with Deathwater and hose them all down."
"I'm sure even these simpletons considered that option," says Starscream. "It's just too dangerous for them to make the trip on foot."
"They don't have anything we're used to seeing on Earth," adds Trailbreaker. "No tamed animals of any kind--not even a puppy."
"There's a herd of cow-like animals near here," says Skywarp. "The locals call them koiyn. As for the horses," he continues, "they're called kae-phals around this neck of the woods."
Scene: 20
Raleigh colors in his coloring book, while a little girl looks on.
"You want to color?" he asks.
"No." The girl stares at Raleigh's picture: a farmer milking a cow. "What is the man doing to the koiyn?"
"Getting milk," says Raleigh. "He's a farmer, and that's a cow."
Dewey joins in. "There's a herd of animals here that look like our cows, Raleigh."
"Oh." Raleigh continues coloring.
"Maybe I'll ask mother if we can get milk from koiyn," says the girl. She leaves the boys.
"Dang. No milk?" asks Raleigh.
"I don't know why," says Dewey. "Dr. Braxis says they're underdeveloped."
"Turbo says Dr. Braxis is dumb and mean," says Raleigh.
"Yeah," says Dewey, pouting, "but Turbo likes to bogard my Nintendo whenever I come over to visit Granddad."
Scene: 21
The village headman walks over to Anita, upset. "Your sons are filling my granddaughter's head with foolish nonsense!" he says, shoving Raleigh's coloring book into her face.
Anita snatches the coloring book. "Did you hit my son?" she asks calmly.
"No; I figured you'd want to once you see what he's been up to," says the headman.
Anita studies the coloring book, noting Raleigh's coloring on the picture of the farmer milking the cow. "All I see," she says, "is a little boy's scribbling on a picture of a man milking a cow. That's normal where we come from," Anita explains.
"It isn't here," says the headman. "You say the boy did nothing but scribble in this book?"
Anita nods. "Your granddaughter saw this picture," she continues, "and just wondered if it's possible to draw milk from a koiyn the same way this man can draw milk from our cows."
"It's possible," says the headman, "but it's dangerous to bother with the herd too much--especially when the koiyn is carrying young."
Anita smiles. "I think it might have been dangerous for us at one time," she says. "However, many generations ago: our ancestors tamed cows, horses, and other animals for food, work, and even travel."
The headman studies Anita. "You truly are the Seer's people. He said the same thing." He sits next to Anita.
"You're going to tell me that it's impossible," says Anita, "am I right?"
The headman chuckles ruefully. "I'll tell you what I told him," he says. "Every so often," continues the headman, "someone gets a fool idea in his head to tame the koiyn and other animals."
"What happens?" asks Anita.
"He starts to make headway, then a disaster strikes the village," says the headman.
"When was the last time this happened?" Anita asks.
"To my grandfather. I was about your seer-glass wearing boy's age," says the headman, pointing at Dewey, "and I saw burning rocks fall from the sky. One of those rocks killed my grandfather."
"I see. You want to protect the village from any more disasters," says Anita, "so you don't want any crazy new ideas to spread."
"Aye," says the headman. "You're a sensible woman. Is that pale, stringy fellow your husband?" he asks, nodding to Braxis.
Anita balks at this. "No," she says, revealing a photo of Major Newcastle. "My husband's a great warrior who protects my village back home. I'm only here," she continues, frowning, "because the Devilspawn got to me. I...just wanted to protect my son from danger."
The headman stares at Anita, who trembles.
Shaking, Anita hugs the coloring book to her body and sobs.
END SPECIAL THREE
- 2
- 3
- 4
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Curse of the Devilspawn!