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Aventure Amoureuse	By : Baron Category: +M through R > Miraculous LadyBug Views: 5012 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction for adults. Miraculous Ladybug and its characters are not mine, and are the property of ZAG-inc. I make no profit from this and all characters are 18+.

Chapter List
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You find a table in the smoking section with a decent view of the stage. The bouncers have cleared out the people who rushed the stage earlier and now there was a gory hybrid of a magic show and a performance art piece going on. You're pretty sure it had something to do with French politics. The severed rabbit's head was probably meant to represent the working class and the top hat was meant to represent the French government somehow. You didn't really understand performance art. "So what do you want to order?" you ask Chat Noir as a waitress dressed like a zombie version of Marie Antoinette comes up to your table with menus and a program guide for tonight's show. "Are you two ready to order, or do you need more time?" she asks looking at the two of you. "Let's not get AHEAD of ourselves. Give us a moment." Chat snickers as he thumbs through a menu. "Oh you're a scream." the waitress says in a tone implying that she's heard that lame joke several times tonight already. "You'll have to forgive my friend, he's having a rough night. We'll at least order drinks. Give us two double whiskeys, neat." you tell the waitress as Chat continues thumbing though the menu. "Very good. I'll be right back." the waitress says before walking away. "Whiskey? Isn't that a bit... um... strong?" Chat asks looking up from the menu. "We French are more accustomed to our wine." he continues. "Trust me. Let me make it up to you. A stiff drink would do you some good." you say lighting up a coffin nail. The waitress returns with the whiskey on a metal tray. "Here's your drinks. I'll be back to take your order shortly. "Thanks for the HEADS up." you chuckle and wink and Chat Noir. "I fucking HATE nights when I have to be Marie Antoinette." the waitress grumbles as she walks into the kitchen. "Heh heh. Head's up." Chat giggles looking through the menu. "Try your drink." you tell Chat as you look through a menu. "What the hell is a death biscuit? It sounds like a tumor." you ask Chat as you read the menu. "Everything has a weird morbid name here. I think the plague rat is chicken." he says as he takes a sip of whiskey and coughs. "You ok?" you ask him as you take a drink and a drag of your cigarette. "Fine. It's... smooth." Chat says nearly gagging. "Give it a second to kick in." you tell Chat as you see the large bouncer from the main entrance approaching your table. "Uh-oh. I think we got company." you tell Chat clenching your fists in preparation. "Mr. Stone wants to see you both in his office immediately!" the large man informs you. "Sure, French prisons can't be that bad, right?" you say nervously as you and Chat Noir both follow the large bald man.
The gigantic bouncer leads you to an office with a white star on the door with the words: "Jagged Stone" written below it in white lettering. He opens the door to see Jagged get up from his desk happily saying "There's our star! I was hopin' you ain't left yet." smiling widely at Chat Noir. "H-Hi.." Chat squeaks nervously at his hero. "Sorry about that little wardrobe malfunction back there, mate. That codpiece was supposed to come off a lot sooner." Jagged explains to the blushing cat boy. "What about compensation for my client?" you ask Jagged sternly. "Oi?" Jagged responds slightly confused. "I'm his manager. My dancer was nearly trampled to death by crazed fans in your nightclub." you explain to the rocker. "Oh, bloody hell. I can't deal with another lawsuit. Here, have your pay and a bonus. I'll even throw in a few party favors." Jagged says as he puts a large stack of Euros on the desk and places a fat brick of marijuana on top of the pile of money sliding them towards Chat Noir. "What's this? Drugs?" Chat Noir asks innocently. "Uh... better let me hold that. I'll explain what this is later." you say as you pocket the weed and hand Chat his stack of cash. "We happy?" Jagged asks you both. "Oh, yes sir! Very happy!" Chat beams at the rockstar. "Good, I gotta get back to work. Don't let the door hit your arse on the way out." Jagged says flipping through papers on his desk. "Oh, there is one more thing..." you inform the busy rockstar. "Oh? What's that?" Jagged says looking up at you from his desk. "May I have your autograph?" you politely ask him. "Autograph? Sure, I'll sign one of me posters. As a matter of fact, since I'm feelin' generous, I'll give you a signed copy of me new album as well since your mate was nearly trampled." he says as he signs a large poster and a CD. "There you go. Bob's your uncle." Jagged says handing you the CD and poster. "No, my uncle's name was..." you begin to say as Chat elbows your arm sharply. "That's NOT what Bob's your uncle means!" Chat says quietly through gritted teeth as he drags you out of the office before you say something stupid in front of his idol. "Well whatever it means, I got you an autograph." you say smiling at him and handing him the signed CD and poster. He hugs you so hard that he nearly knocks you off your feet. "Come on, let's get back to our table. I still owe you dinner." you smile as he hugs your arm the entire way back to the table.
"I can't believe you got me his autograph!" Chat Noir beams as he inspects the poster. "And a nice payday to boot." you remind the happy young hero. "It's still pretty early. We still have time to have dinner and watch a few of the acts. I'm probably going to order the brain maggots. I think that's a rice dish or something." you say taking a drink of your whiskey. "I think I'll get Napoleon's intestines. I'm pretty sure that's sausages and potatoes." Chat says reading the fine print on the menu. "Are you two ready to order yet?" the waitress dressed like Marie Antoinette asks upon returning to your table. "Yeah, I think so. Don't lose your head over it." Chat Noir says laughing. "You two cheapskates better tip me, I swear to fuckin' God..." the waitress replies having her fill of head jokes for the evening. "Let me get an order of the brain maggots, and Napoleon's intestines for my handsome friend here." you tell the waitress as she jots down your order. "Do you want gallstones with that?" she asks pausing her writing. "Nah, just the entrees." Chat answers as she politely nods and returns to the kitchen. "She liked you I think. Maybe she'll give you a little head." you say teasing Chat Noir and sipping your drink. "Maybe I like it better from you." he says with a sexy wink nearly making you spit out your whiskey. "I-I thought you were mad at me?" you ask as the whiskey burns your nose making your eyes water. "I was a little bit, but you have a way of making up for it. I doubt you intended to strip me in public." Chat says drinking his whiskey. "Honestly, I just wanted to bluff the bouncer and sneak to the bar. I didn't know they'd actually make you dance, but I had to go along with it or I would have blown our cover." you explain to the cat boy. "Heh. You can blow my cover anytime." Chat says looking a bit woozy. "That shit got right on top of you, didn't it?" you ask the slightly drunk young hero. "I told you I was a wine guy." Chat says as the waitress returns with the food. "Here you go. One brain maggots, and one Napoleon's intestines." she says setting the plates on the table. "Hey! Hey! My friend over there said you wanted to blow me." Chat says pointing at you while tugging on the waitresses apron. She gives you a very angry look. "Um... don't mind him. He's NOT a whiskey drinker." you explain to the furious waitress. "Can you please bring him a cup of black coffee?" you ask the waitress pointing at the drunken cat boy. "Yeah, watch how fast I go." the waitress huffs angrily. "Dude, you're going to get us thrown out of here! Eat your dinner and soak up some of that alcohol." you warn Chat Noir as he eats his sausages. "I didn't think you'd get THAT drunk that fast." you tell him as you eat your rice and shrimp. "Sorry, it was pretty strong. By the way, what was that green bag Jagged gave us in his office?" Chat asks you as he tries to absorb the alcohol with his food. "I'll show you when we get back to the hotel. You're staying tonight, right? I don't want you wandering Paris in your condition. As a matter of fact, I'll call a cab to get us home." you explain to the tipsy young hero.
The waitress returns with a cup of black coffee and the check. "Here, I'll get it." you tell her as you fumble for your money. "I'll give you a nice tip for your troubles as well. Share the wealth, right?" you smile at her politely as Chat continues eating. "Thanks, I appreciate it. Some days I really hate this job." the waitress explains. "Well, the trick is not to let it go to your HEAD." you grin at her. "OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!" the waitress yells before regaining her composure. "Get it together, Carol. Count to ten, count to ten..." the waitress says storming off in a huff as Chat Noir laughs hysterically. The two of you finish your dinner and watch a few of the acts at the cabaret. One act is a poodle juggling chainsaws. Another act was a tattooed female fire-eater wearing only a python as clothing. There was another act consisting of nude mimes pantomiming an orgy in what appeared to be slow motion. The final act of the night was Jagged Stone doing a cover of The Last Day on Earth in French before the bartender gave the last call. You hold Chat Noir's hand singing the lyrics to him in your native language along with Jagged Stone's French as you watch the young cat boy's eyes sparkle as he listens intently. When the song finishes, you kiss him until the bouncer taps you on the shoulder and gestures toward the exit. You call a cab in the parking lot as Chat rests his head on your shoulder.
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Aventure Amoureuse