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Marlene's Log	By : pronker Category: +M through R > Penguins of Madagascar Views: 1781 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I wrote this not-for-profit fanfiction using Dreamworks' Penguins of Madagascar characters and settings and I do not own Dreamworks.

Chapter List
- 1-1/?
- 2-2/3
- 3-3/3
- 1
- 2
- 3
At the first sentence out of Kowalski's beak, Marlene wondered if he had dumbed down the intel just for her. He'd never done that before. He broke from parade rest to place flippers akimbo in unconscious imitation of Skipper, or was it conscious? "You know how all our team likes movies?"
"Well, sure, who doesn't like movies?" Where could this possibly be heading?
"I don't mean just Commodore Danger movies, I mean all sorts. Even animated ones." He and Skipper traded glances, Skipper's face remaining blank as an unshucked quahog.
Still in the dark, Marlene went on, "Yup, all kinds, when time permits. Where are you going with this because I don't know how long Momma Duck can babysit."
Kowalski continued, "Skipper prefers action movies, but I'm open to all sorts and I thought you were, too." Way to go, 'Ski, get me on your side against Skipper. I'm not buying into that, but you're a brainy bird.
"Huh? Yes, I like about anything domestic." Marlene considered. "Foreign, not so much."
Kowalski seized on the point like he would on a baby bluefin tuna. "So you fess up to standards and will understand how the Avian Bechdel-Wallace Test works." He harrumphed. "The Avian Bechdel-Wallace Test prevents boredom in selecting a movie to watch."
Curiouser and curiouser. Marlene blinked. "Huh. Uh huh. Yeah. So this is a movie thing that - applies to real life? Really?"
Kowalski waggled a flipper as if it were a pointer and he pranced at the head of a classroom. "Sassy Mae West said it best: They say movies should be more like real life and I say that real life should be more like the movies."
Skipper and Kowalski nodded as one and if Sally were there, Marlene would have clapped her paws over her little pengotter daughter's eyes so she wouldn't see this. "You can't be serious. It isn't science, guys."
Uh oh, now she'd done it. "Marlene, science is my life. Do not presume to know what science is." Kowalski crossed his flippers tightly over his chest and presented his tall profile to her. "Do not."
It was too much to bear. "So you're saying that Hollywood's Commodore Danger is realistic when he bebops into the Big Bad's hypersecret base, nixes his scheme to take over the world and wins the Big Bad's lady to the side of the angels with one kiss, all without owwieing so much as a hangnail?" The two started to speak at the same time and she cut them off. "Yes, I know that happened in From Sweden With Furniture but we know what a flop that one was. Cubby Broccoli was lucky to get the next one in the series produced."
"Please, Marlene, no mention of broccoli! I have a delicate stomach." Kowalski smothered a burp as he brought himself back on track. "To continue, the Avian Bechdel-Wallace Test insists that the movie has to have at least two birds in it, birds who talk to each other, birds who talk to each other about something other than each other for more than two stinking minutes!" The scientist's voice rose throughout the explanation until the final five words echoed throughout the HQ. Skipper chimed in.
"Did you add that last part upon further research or is that just hysteria, Science Boy?"
Marlene blanked her own face at Kowalski's embarrassed study of his left great toe while he mumbled, "I could see where Bechdel and/or Wallace was going with it, sir."
"Carry on. Tell Marlene what you told the rest of the team and make it snappy before Manfredi and Johnson return from their snack run and/or Momma Duck needs to get back to the park."
She and Skipper were parents together and always would be; they did not have to always be teammates. Marlene prodded her brain to push ahead to a conclusion to help her new friends as she pushed aside notions of adopting a less demanding motto. "Okay, so Manfredi and Johnson spent six years in an aquatic-themed fun park always within ear, uh, earhole shot of each other, same enclosure day after day, same nest night after night for all I know." It must be Kowalski boning up on his stoic side that made him match Skipper's adamantine expression at her speculation. She could parse this later because she must offer her intuition as a duty-bound team member. "That's certain to make any two animals groove on each other more than normal. You'd think our team could handle it."
Skipper was a clever bird himself at forging alliances in difficult situations. "Yes, Marlene, I told Kowalski that but he holds that too much togetherness leads to attachment that could hurt the team if a certain somebody thinks of his other certain somebody first rather than the whole team. Or something like that." A peal of thunder rumbled on this unsettled day and everyone ignored it because May flowers depended on April showers in New York City. There must be a way to make Central Park Zoo better than Seaville incarceration for Manfredi and Johnson, so think smarter, not harder, Marlene.
As the third and non-officer wheel, Marlene felt compelled to leaven the mix of gloom and doom with lighter options. "Security guard duty one at a time in the government weapons lab! You know, rent-a-cop stuff where each could just sit around, be a, a presence to scare away baddies like Hans - "
"Six years, Marlene. They're not getting better from their injuries and they rely on each other more than ever since they returned. I won't risk them physically or tactically in a sensitive and critical position like guarding. And I'm done explaining my position." There it was, silk draped over steel that originally attracted her and now proved a bone of contention. This would not turn into a family fight if she had anything to say about it.
Kowalski broke in with a comment tinged with exasperation. "Sir, I suggested splitting them up a long time ago because they are codependent."
"Yeah, you mean synergized but I'll let that pass." An uncomfortable silence descended as Skipper did that thing with his cup of fish coffee involving sucking the sardine's head and tail to get the last caffeine droplet before downing the fish headfirst. Marlene needed an out.
"I can't breathe in here because it's, uh, sultry. The HQ is crowding on me." She aimed a pleading glance halfway between her commander and her lieutenant while trotting out her winsome look. The two appeared tetchy, bordering on alarm.
"You're not going feral, are you, babe? I thought we had that problem licked."
"Sir, relative humidity in our lair approaches 92 percent and with ambient temperature topside of 75 degrees Fahrenheit, we feel like it's 80 degrees down here. Soon we'll show symptoms of" - he sniffed his pit - "unsociability."
Skipper capitulated. "I see. Let's adj- "
"Last one topside is a rotten Eggy!" Marlene coiled her tail to push herself up the ladder and bounced onto the faux floe under the changeable spring sky. Clouds raced each other up high as the wet cement mirrored their scudding in the puddles of the recent shower. The wind whistled throughout the zoo while Marlene's jaw dropped and she froze. She blocked the hatch as glory filled her soul.
"Hey, babe, I'm in fighting trim but not that trim so move aside to let me pass."
Marlene shifted to the right in a zombie-like fashion while all thoughts of crafting a decision about her team, her new friends and her motto fled. She sidled aside a littleneck clam's width more to allow her love to escape serious issues, too. Skipper halted in the hatch as he took in the sight that his years of experience had never witnessed. Kowalski's voice slithered past the blockage.
"Sir, I can't get by - Skipper?"
A double rainbow glowed in two arches, rarer than rare. Marlene thought her soul could fill no further but she was wrong because approaching were Manfredi and Johnson with Private and Rico trailing behind. Surely this inspiring view of Nature would lead to a solution agreeable to all.
She had to believe that.
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Marlene's Log