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Plankton's Journey To The Brain Of Sandy Cheeks	By : xandermartin98 Category: +S through Z > SpongeBob SquarePants Views: 7983 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: AFF Disclaimer: I do not own Spongebob Squarepants. Nor I do make profit from it

Chapter List
- 1
- 2
- 3
AT ABOUT 11:00 (A.M.) OF THE NEXT MORNING, AFTER SPONGEBOB AND SANDY HAD RATHER ADORABLY SLEPT TOGETHER IN THE FORMER'S HOUSE WHILE PLANKTON SLEPT IN THE LATTER'S DELIGHTFULLY WARM, SOFT AND SPONGY BRAIN AFTER VERY HORNILY AND FURIOUSLY-MASTURBATINGLY WATCHING THE TWO OF THEM HAVE SEX WITH EACH OTHER...
"Plankton, are you really SURE that you aren't just horrifically torturing Sandy for the pure sake of it so that this episode's writers can get their freaking rocks off?" Karen very sternly and VERY worriedly asked Plankton (who, naturally enough, was still remarkably deep inside Sandy's brain) using her cell phone while EXTREMELY-concernedly browsing her way through the Bikini Bottom Daily News on her rather firmly coffee-table-mounted laptop in the Chum Bucket's living room.
"Oh...why, of COURSE not, sweetie! In fact, I've been the absolute SWEETEST of little angels to her!" Plankton ever-so-despicably lied through his teeth (briefly covering his mouth with his right hand in order to stop himself from laughing as he did so) while holding his OWN cell phone with his left hand and FAR-too-comfortably kicking back (complete with him rather girlishly crossing his legs, no less) in his supremely comfortable and royal-feeling "brain cockpit" seat.
"WELL, then, why am I currently reading an online newspaper headline article about how the poor girl got her already-tick-infested left ear horrifically mutilated by Dr. Gill, got a HUGE portion of her fur torn right off in the most ridiculously agonizing way possible, AND was QUITE nearly raped by an entire nearly TEN-PERSON gang of muscle-headed idiots from the Salty Spitoon so that so-called DOCTOR Gill could freaking MASTURBATE to said rape occurrence?" Karen increasingly-frustratedly-and-sarcastically asked Plankton, already beginning to rather curiously wonder how much WORSE the little demon's ridiculously blatant and downright sadistic (animal) abuse of Sandy would later become (and by "later", I mean as in "over the course of literally one measly day").
"Oh, don't worry, my sweet little techno-pie; that was ALL Dr. Gill's fault, I SWEAR!" Plankton shrugged his shoulders and rather blatantly lied through his teeth while Karen increasingly-irritatedly rolled her (digital) eyes in response.
"UH-HUH...well, don't blame ME if/when you end up with a freaking DEATH penalty for whatever utterly unforgivable things you're most likely about to use your newfound control over my poor little Sandy's brain to do to her; DO YOU FUCKING UNDERSTAND ME, YOU GOD-DAMNED COCK-SUCKING MOTHERFUCKER?!" Karen very politely (albeit rather sassily) warned Plankton...then suddenly went absolutely nuclear and downright-FURIOUSLY screamed at him, causing his antennae to rather humorously get blown off to the side from how ridiculously loudly she was doing so in the process.
"HUH? Was that KAREN that I just heard?!" the now-re-suited Sandy (who was still partially deaf due to the INCREDIBLY major damage that had just recently been dealt to her left eardrum) rather nervously and startledly gasped in surprise while she and the (rather thankfully) re-dressed Spongebob cozily sat together on the latter's makeshift two-person sofa and rather ironically watched the Bikini Bottom Daily News (which, naturally enough, just so happened to be talking about the exact same atrocities that Karen had just mentioned to Plankton) themselves.
"NAH, it was probably just your imagination!" Spongebob swung his left hand straight down like a cat paw, lovingly patted Sandy on the back (of her suit) with his right hand and ever-so-playfully-teasingly chuckled at her (Sandy's) surprisingly unintentional expense while Plankton continued chatting with Karen from deep inside the poor squirrel lady's increasingly-fearfully trembling head.
"Oh, for CRYING out loud, woman, do I REALLY need to freaking spell it out for you? R-E-V-E-N-G-E! That's all I'm doing, okay? I'm just getting REVENGE on Sandy for what SHE'S done to ME!" Plankton exasperatedly threw his arms out beside himself and began increasingly-crankily ranting at Karen while said computer wife VERY annoyedly rolled her (digital) eyes and ever-so-deliciously-sarcastically muttered "uh-huh" to herself in response.
"News flash, honey: SHE HASN'T EVEN DONE ANYTHING TO YOU, YA FREAKING LUNATIC! Well, I mean, apart from maybe damaging your oh-so-precious freaking planet-sized EGO from time to time, I suppose...honestly, could you POSSIBLY have come up with a more utterly PATHETIC motivation for what you're doing right now?" Karen furiously continued nagging at Plankton while said micro-organism ever-so-childishly made downright-comically over-exaggerated "blah, blah, blah" gestures with his mouth and his right hand in response.
"Alright, two things: first of all, again, what are you, my freaking MOTHER?!" Plankton rather surprisingly-politely began explaining to Karen, then suddenly VERY tightly gripped his cell phone with both of his hands and VERY indignantly yelled into it, causing the pupils of Sandy's eyes to suddenly shrink to a nearly microscopic size as she equally-suddenly began to realize just how right she had been when she had accused Plankton of being inside her head back at Goo Lagoon.
"SECOND of all, why should I even freaking NEED reasonable motivations for the types of things that I do? For Neptune's sake, I wear the word 'EVIL' around my neck like a freaking SCARF! I terrorize Bikini Bottom literally just for FUN! Allow me to repeat myself: I! AM! A! VILLAIN!" Plankton transferred his cell phone into his right hand, face-palmed himself with his left hand and VERY aggravatedly continued ranting at Karen at perhaps one of the loudest volumes that he (yes, HE) was capable of while Sandy very audibly and fear-frozenly gulped in response.
"And that's what worries me more than anything else about you..." Karen dejectedly sighed as she and Plankton finally hung up on each other, leaving Sandy too nervous to even move, let alone speak.
"Umm, S-Sandy? WHY do you look so scared right now?" Spongebob gently poked the still-motionless-and-basically-speechless Sandy on the left shoulder (of her suit) with his right index finger and increasingly-worriedly asked her, somehow STILL not realizing what was going on inside the poor girl's central nervous system as he did so.
"Because I've lost control of my life." Sandy curled herself up into an adorably helpless and bushy-tailed little upright-sitting ball and flatly explained to Spongebob while Plankton EXTREMELY-sarcastically went “AWW, YOU POOR THING” in response.
"Uhh...what exactly do you MEAN by that, pardon my asking?" Spongebob incredibly-ignorantly asked Sandy, scratching his head with his left index finger as he did so while Plankton ever-so-eagerly-and-snickeringly began re-taking control over the brain within said squirrel lady’s own head.
"I've (suddenly goes cross-eyed and wildly twitches all over the place before then contorting her face into a freakishly huge ear-to-ear smile) become utterly unable to CONTAIN how incredibly happy I am to be with you, Spongebob! Come ON, you silly goose; let's go out and have all KINDS of fun together!" Sandy EXTREMELY-hyperactively sprung right back up onto her feet and began maniacally (not to mention VERY obviously mind-controlledly) laughing and giggling, hastily turning the TV off with her right hand and then VERY forcefully grabbing Spongebob's own right hand with her left hand so that she could THEN proceed to just-AS-forcefully drag him straight out of the front door of his house and into his Boat-Mobile.
"GEEZ, Sandy, what's gotten INTO you?" Spongebob increasingly-frightenedly asked Sandy, somehow STILL not realizing just how amusingly literal the answer to said question actually was as Sandy frantically leaped into the passenger seat of his Boat-Mobile while also rather brutishly throwing him into the driver's seat of said boat-shaped automobile.
"HAPPINESS! HAPPINESS! HAPPINESS!" Sandy began bloodshot-eyedly and dementedly-grinningly chanting over and over again like a broken record while Spongebob just weirded-out-ly glared at her and increasingly-confusedly went "UHH" in response, still not quite sure what to make of what(ever) he was now seeing.
“Geez, how freaking gullible can Spongebob GET?” Plankton rather amazedly thought to himself.
ONE ENTIRE MINUTE LAY-TERR...
"Gee WHIZ, I freaking GET it, okay? You're HAPPY! Now PLEASE just TELL me where you want to GO, before I go completely freaking INSANE!" Spongebob, after twitchy-eyedly and teeth-grittingly listening to Sandy's incessant "HAPPINESS" chanting for...well, literally an entire minute, finally ran out of patience, grabbed Sandy by the arms (of her suit), pressed his face directly into the front of her helmet and EXTREMELY-aggravatedly yelled at her, clutching his chest with both of his hands and heavily breathing for several seconds in order to re-gain his energy after doing so.
"Oh, I've got SEVERAL places in mind, sweetums, and every single one of them is absolutely FUN-TASTIC!" Sandy ecstatically cheered with delight, rather mushily wrapping her arms around Spongebob and floating-heart-symbol-producingly cuddling him as she did so while he just irritatedly shoved her away from himself and yelled "GET THE HECK OFF OF ME, YOU FREAKING HYPERACTIVE NUT-CASE" at her in response.
ONE HALF-HOUR LAY-TERR, AFTER SPONGEBOB HAD SOMEWHAT RELUCTANTLY DRIVEN SANDY OVER TO HER TREEDOME AND THEN DRIVEN HER OVER TO BIKINI BOTTOM'S QUITE LITERALLY-NAMED "FANCY!" RESTAURANT FROM THERE...
"TEE HEE HEE HEE HEE! Oh, sweet HEAVENS, you're just utterly SPOILING me so MUCH, Spongebob!" Sandy (who was now suitless and therefore footwear-less and was also wearing a fancy purple dress from her personal wardrobe back at the TreeDome) tightly clutched her chest with both of her hands and INCREDIBLY-merrily laughed with delight as she and Spongebob ever-so-charmingly sat together at their (rather exceptionally nice-looking) dining table and ever-so-eagerly waited for their main course to arrive.
"I mean...FOOT WORSHIP between courses?" Sandy very ticklishly and toe-wigglingly giggled as the servant squid underneath the table lovingly, blushingly and even DROOLINGLY caressed and licked her lovely, lovely bare feet, even going so far as to very passionately (albeit rather creepily and downright pervertedly) suck on her ever-so-adorable little toes multiple times as he did so.
"CARICATURES?" Sandy gleefully laughed in her ludicrously thick Texan accent as she rather-excessively-proudly held and looked at her exaggeratedly buck-toothed new portrait of herself.
"Ludicrously nonsensical plot devices that somehow enable me to breathe underwater when nothing else will?" Sandy increasingly-happily (albeit rather disbelievingly) chuckled, rudely shoving her aforementioned caricature of herself underneath the table and then using her index fingers to indicatively point at the ACTUAL gills that the Gill Pill that she had swallowed in her bathroom back at the TreeDome right before being driven over to "Fancy!" had somehow caused her to temporarily grow on her neck (for an entire DAY, no less, with her lungs still remaining fully functional all the while) as she did so.
"Honestly, how much more stupidly perfect can this lunch-eating experience of ours GET?" Sandy threw her arms out beside herself and very satisfiedly chuckled while Spongebob (who was now wearing a tuxedo from his Boat-Mobile's glove box) shrugged his shoulders and ever-so-playfully joked "I dunno; you tell ME" in response.
"Oh, I'll freaking TELL you, all right...you damned NUMB-SKULL..." Plankton ever-so-deviously rubbed his hands together and increasingly-sadistically cackled to himself in Sandy's brain control cockpit while Spongebob somehow STILL remained blissfully unaware of what the poor girl's incredibly bizarre recent mood swings had been artificially caused by.
"And now for your delightfully extravagant main course, dashing young patrons of ours!" Spongebob's and Sandy's designated (octopus) waiter suddenly arrived to serve them said meal and then VERY pompously stated as he grabbed exactly two plates of lovingly crafted but probably WAY-less-healthy-than-it-looked pasta (topped/drenched with clam sauce for Spongebob's plate and spinach alfredo sauce for Sandy's) off of the giant silver platter atop his rather un-necessarily fancy-looking four-wheeled food-delivering table and incredibly-gracefully set both of them atop said couple's aforementioned dining table, then proceeded to grab exactly two lemon-wedge-topped glasses of blood-red wine off of that exact same platter and more-or-less equally-gracefully set THEM atop said (couple's) dining table.
"Now PLEASE make sure to eat and drink this LOVELY culinary art of ours as politely as possible, for our reputation's sake!" said (octopus) waiter rather sternly warned Spongebob and Sandy, causing Spongebob to very worriedly and tremblingly nod his head in agreement with said command while Sandy just blankly stared off into space with a downright-stupidly big smile on her face.
"Well, you know what they SAY; truly, rules were MADE to be broken!" Plankton increasingly-excitedly laughed as he suddenly re-took complete control over Sandy, causing her to just-as-suddenly COMPLETELY forget how to eat (and drink) like an actually civilized and non-wild animal (not to mention how to control/moderate the intensity of her Southern accent) in the process.
"Boy HAYOW-DEE (HOWDY), hwat (what) rooty-toot-tootin' FINE coozane (cuisine) this right hayer (here) is! Why, ah (I) could just scarf it right day-yown (down) like a wild HAWG (HOG), right HAYER (HERE) and nay-yow (now)!" Sandy suddenly began loudly chuckling and giggling with delight in a quite-plainly-ridiculously stereotypical “hillbilly voice” as she immediately dug right into her spinach alfredo pasta with her bare hands, ravenously devouring it by the handful and chewing it with her mouth as wide-open as she could possibly manage while literally everyone else surrounding her (ESPECIALLY Spongebob and the restaurant’s aforementioned waiters) disgustedly, motionlessly and COMPLETELY-speechlessly stared/glared at her in response.
"And I'm MOWER (MORE) than willin' ta (to) bet that the bayer (beer) is just plain HAVENLY (HEAVENLY)! Nay-ver (Never) bay-fower (before) have ah (I) feyelt (felt) quite so HWITE (WHITE), lemme TAIL (TELL) you!" Sandy, after indeed maniacally scarfing down her entire plate of pasta like a wild animal while the restaurant employees and customers surrounding her were too shocked to even be able to do anything about it, uproariously laughed (guffawed, if you will) as she then proceeded to ferociously grab her wine glass with both of her hands (after very daintily removing its complimentary lemon wedge and then setting said lemon wedge down onto the tabletop with her left hand, for some reason) and then immediately chug (more or less) every last drop of wine within it RIGHT down as if it was a giant frothy mug of beer, getting numerous blood-red wine stains all over her dress in the process while the now-empty-handed waiters surrounding her formed incredibly fierce-looking fists with their hands and turned bright steaming red with pure, blood-boiling and about-to-become-unbridled anger that was actually a rather hilariously unusual emotion to see them expressing so publicly.
"BLOOOOOOGH!" Sandy burped as loudly and as drawn-out-ly as she possibly could, causing the fellow customers surrounding her (surprisingly excluding Spongebob) to COMPLETELY-disgustedly gag in response while Spongebob crossed his arms over his chest and UNBELIEVABLY-disappointedly glared at her with downright soul-piercing intensity; meanwhile, the waiters surrounding her reluctantly swallowed their already-heavily-damaged pride and began thunderously stomping their way toward her.
"Sir and ma'am, we really are DEARLY sorry for interrupting this so-called ‘FINE dining’ session of yours, but I’m terribly afraid that we're going to have to kindly ask the two of you to leave this restaurant…preferably NOW!" the exact same (octopus) waiter who had previously set Sandy's and Spongebob's drinks and meals atop their table rather impressively-politely (but still downright SEETHINGLY) explained to said couple...then suddenly lost his patience altogether and VERY furiously yelled at them due to their increasingly blatant refusal to obey him while Sandy ever-so-merrily shoved her aforementioned lemon wedge directly into her mouth using both of her hands so that she could then proceed to downright-OBNOXIOUSLY-loudly-and-sloppily suck/chew the juice out of it and then VERY rudely spit it out onto the floor.
"Now HOLD ON a minute, you uppity jerks! I didn't even have anything to DO with this sudden outburst of hers! Why, I haven't even gotten to freaking EAT anything, for Neptune's sake!" Spongebob threw his arms straight up into the "air" and BEYOND-aggravatedly pointed out to the waiters while Sandy VERY drunkenly and barely-even-still-seatedly swayed her head back and forth and (spinach-toothedly) grinned from ear to ear like an absolute idiot (which was something that she rather ironically was actually quite the opposite of, needless to say).
"Do we REALLY look as if we care about you and your silly EXCUSES right now?" the waiters scathingly sneered at Spongebob, making downright-nightmare-inducingly angry-looking and Skodwarde-esque faces at him as they did so.
"Well, no (shudders intensely), but before you guys kick us out of here, can't we at least get a complimentary PHOTO of ourselves? Pretty PLEASE?" Spongebob began increasingly-desperately asking the waiters, nervously clasping his hands together and applying a massively over-exaggerated and downright (AHEM) embarrassing "puppy dog" effect to his eyes as he did so...a "puppy dog" effect that (again, needless to say) had absolutely no ACTUAL effect on said waiters, other than making them uproariously laugh at him for his (AHEM) extreme immaturity and sappiness while Plankton and (therefore) Sandy very agreeingly did the same.
"Yeah, sure...for the freaking local NEWSPAPER!" the waiters smugly joked while the restaurant’s main photographer snapped a nice big photo of Sandy cross-eyedly, slack-jawed-ly and droolingly grinning from ear to ear with blood (red wine) stains all over her dress and a MASSIVE amount of spinach stuck between her already-stupidly-massive buck teeth while Spongebob INCREDIBLY-meekly waved at said photographer with both of his hands and nervously, sweatily grinned in the fakest and most awkward way possible.
ONE RIDICULOUSLY MASSIVE SERVICE BILL PAYMENT (MAINLY BY SPONGEBOB) LAY-TERR...
"AND (desperately struggling to hold in their laughter) STAY OUT!" the waiters of "Fancy!" furiously screamed at Sandy and Spongebob while quite literally kicking the two of them out of said restaurant (not to mention right in their asses) after making them pay a roughly-five-HUNDRED-dollar service fee (as opposed to a roughly-ONE-hundred-dollar service fee) JUST for how much Sandy's behavior had indeed utterly humiliated said restaurant's staff (not to mention its customers) as a whole.
"SANDY, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, WHAT IN THE ACTUAL HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!? I'VE NEVER BEEN MORE EMBARRASSED IN MY ENTIRE FREAKING LIFE! AND NEITHER HAVE YOU, FOR THAT MATTER!" Spongebob downright-FURIOUSLY screamed at Sandy at the tops of his ever-loving lungs, grabbing her by the shoulders and frantically shaking her with all of his might as he did so while she just mindlessly flailed her incredibly slender neck and limbs around like a rag doll (Raggedy Ann, to be exact) and continued idiotically drooling in response.
"SNAP THE FUCK OUT OF IT!" Spongebob rather un-characteristically swore at Sandy, ferociously bitch-slapping her right across the face with his left hand, followed by his right hand, and so on...until finally, FINALLY, the poor girl woke up from her Plankton-induced mind-control dream with an intensely aching head and even MORE aching cheeks (of both the face AND butt varieties, no less).
"UGGGH...where in the Hell AM I? What in the Hell just HAPPENED?" Sandy very drunkenly and VERY confusedly slurred, clutching her head with both of her hands and dizzily swaying back and forth as she did so while Spongebob crossed his arms over his chest, looked down at the ground and rather hatefully muttered "with girlfriends like these" underneath his breath in response.
"SIGH...let's just say that you REALLY need to stop taking those freaking Gill Pills of yours and leave it at that." Spongebob dejectedly groaned as he and Sandy immediately walked straight back over to the former's Boat-Mobile without another word so that they could hopefully find at least some kind of way to make at least SOME of their lost money back.
ANOTHER HALF-HOUR LAY-TERR, AFTER SANDY HAD EVER-SO-CONVENIENTLY ANTI-GILL-PILLED HERSELF BACK TO NORMAL IN HER TREEDOME’S BATHROOM AND THEN RATHER HASTILY RE-SUITED HERSELF IN THAT EXACT SAME BATHROOM...
"Uhh...Spongebob, WHERE exactly are we going, again?" Sandy suddenly looked over at the ever-so-obliviously smiling Spongebob (who, of course, had already changed his outfit back into his regular one using his Boat-Mobile’s aforementioned glove box) and rather nervously asked him as the two of them seemingly-aimlessly rode around Bikini Bottom in Spongebob's Boat-Mobile while the local pedestrians, fellow Boat-Mobile drivers, police officers and whatnot of said city ever-so-mockingly pointed and laughed at Sandy and gave her all kinds of weird looks, causing her to very tightly clench her fists and VERY irritatedly growl at said city-dwellers in response.
"Why, to the new Bikini Bottom Comedy Club, of course! Where ELSE are WE going to be able to legally, quickly, non-exhaustingly AND non-fraudulently make our lost money back in OUR current mental and reputational states, huh?" Spongebob ever-so-merrily laughed while Sandy briefly opened her mouth as if to suggest the Krusty Krab, but then immediately shut said mouth after remembering how downright-LUDICROUSLY cheap of a boss Mr. Krabs was.
(Needless to say, Spongebob and Sandy still had roughly 9,500 dollars from their sue-ing of Dr. Gill ALONE due to how INCREDIBLY fucked-up Bikini Bottom’s legal and economic systems quite frankly were, so this whole endeavor was pretty much entirely pointless to begin with and also rather ironically made Spongebob himself come across as being almost as greedy as Mr. Krabs...but anyway, on with the show.)
ABOUT FIFTEEN MINUTES LAY-TERR, AT THE BIKINI BOTTOM COMEDY CLUB...
"Knock 'em dead, Sandy!" Spongebob briefly peeked out from behind a nice big set of stage curtains and ever-so-encouragingly whispered to Sandy while said extremely-dorkily astronaut-suited squirrel lady (in addition to suddenly realizing that she REALLY should have kept her gills on after all) nervously, sweatily and very-fakely-grinningly trembled on the (center) stage of the Bikini Bottom Comedy Club's auditorium, tapping on the sound-receiving part of her microphone a few times with her right hand in order to make sure that said microphone was working (not to mention stall for time) while the numerous members of her audience impatiently sat at their rather oddly fancy dining(?) tables and very rudely glared at her in a way that just absolutely SCREAMED "hurry it up already".
"HOO, boy...TALK about some utterly amazing comedic MATERIAL! Despite having only one eye, I can already see EXACTLY where this is HEAD-ED!" Plankton maliciously chuckled as he VERY un-welcomely browsed his way through Sandy's memory banks (using the key-words "embarrassing" and "secrets", of course) and found numerous utterly dreadful things that she was STILL horribly afraid to reveal to a public audience ever-so-neatly tucked away within them, causing him to disgustingly drool with sadistic arousal as he re-took control over Sandy's body and made her confess every single one of the absolute worst of said secrets to the entire movie-theater-esque audience by which she was now being already-humiliatingly scolded, taunted and thumbs-downed.
"WELL, you see..." Sandy suddenly grabbed her microphone and began, briefly going cross-eyed as she did so while her audience uproariously laughed at her in response.
"You see, back in good old Texas, I came from a VERY poor and VERY white family of squirrel people...and would you like to know what our absolute FAVORITE thing to do was?" Sandy already-rather-embarrassedly began explaining to her audience, then suddenly extremely-encouragingly leaned directly toward said audience and ever-so-teasingly asked its members.
"Eat stupidly fattening food?" one of Sandy's audience members guessed.
"Vote for Republicans?" another one of Sandy's audience members guessed.
"Hate black and Asian people?" yet another one of Sandy's audience members guessed.
"Call non-Christian people Satanists?" yet ANOTHER one of Sandy's audience members guessed.
"Drink beer and watch television all day?" a particularly fat one of Sandy's audience members rather hypocritically guessed.
"Dress up as bedsheet ghosts for Halloween?" one of the children in Sandy's audience rather naively(?) guessed.
"NO! We liked to FUCK each other!" Sandy threw her arms out beside herself and uproariously laughed while her audience (rather understandably) resoundingly gagged in response.
MANY EXTREMELY INAPPROPRIATE DETAILS FROM SANDY ABOUT ALL OF THE DIFFERENT WAYS AND PLACES IN WHICH SHE AND HER FELLOW FAMILY MEMBERS LIKED TO HAVE SEX WITH EACH OTHER (WHILE HER AUDIENCE EVER-SO-MOCKINGLY LAUGHED AT HER FOR HOW UTTERLY DISGUSTING SHE NOW-NOT-SO-SECRETLY WAS ALL THE WHILE) LAY-TERR...
"And when I was in my especially late teen years, I also became so utterly fascinated with the concept of 'superior intelligence' that I even used to write novella-length fetish-porn stories about characters going inside each other's brains, and would sometimes even go so far as to straight-up FINGER myself to said stories! I mean, honestly, how fucking crazy is THAT?" Sandy increasingly-nervously chuckled while numerous members of her audience almost-immediately began laughing themselves nearly to death in response after realizing just how "utterly" pathetic she actually was underneath her tough and manly exterior.
"And you wanna know what my craziest secret of ALL is? THE THREE PEOPLE THAT I LOVE MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD ARE A SEA SPONGE, A STARFISH, AND A FUCKING COMPUTER THAT BELONGS TO PLANKTON!" Sandy very awkwardly snickered, then suddenly got down onto her knees and EXTREMELY over-dramatically (not to mention waterfall-cryingly) wailed into her microphone while her audience chokingly, cryingly and gaspingly rolled on the floor from how unbelievably intensely they were laughing at her.
"Oh, COME ON, people; at least I actually more-or-less MATCH Karen's size!" Sandy (surprisingly still-mind-controlledly) threw her arms out beside herself and indignantly whined as her audience members suddenly recovered from their laughter and then downright-revoltedly began throwing numerous (rotten and slimy) tomatoes at her in response, calling her numerous incredibly hateful names such as "computer fucker", "fucking whore", "bisexual bitch" and even "one-dimensional, feminist-agenda-promoting Mary Sue" as they did so.
"WELL, WELL, WELL...this whole 'making Sandy publicly confess every single one of her deepest and darkest secrets' plan of mine may have unfortunately been cut rather extremely short by my DISGUSTINGLY ungrateful audience, but they've DEFINITELY got one HELL of another thing coming if they seriously think that THIS is going to stop ME! Make fun of my freaking HOST, will they? I'LL show them! Hell, I'll freaking show them ALL if I have to!" Plankton crossed his arms over his chest and began increasingly-smugly monologuing, then suddenly COMPLETELY lost his mind altogether and began furiously ranting as he rather forcefully grabbed the SIZE knob on the main dashboard of Sandy's brain control cockpit and then ever-so-recklessly turned it all the way up to its legendary "SQUIRREL-ZILLA" setting, causing Sandy and her suit to both suddenly begin growing WAY beyond their normal sizes while Plankton himself (due to technically being connected to Sandy's body, just like her aforementioned suit) somehow ALSO began growing at the exact same rate!
"SANDY, NO! PLEASE DON'T DO THIS! FOR NEPTUNE'S SAKE, YOU STILL HAVE SO FREAKING MUCH TO LIVE FOR!" Spongebob ran out onto the (center) stage of the Bikini Bottom Comedy Club's auditorium, got down onto his knees, placed his hands together in prayer position, looked straight up at Sandy's clearly Plankton-infested head and downright-laughably-cornily begged her with all of his aquatic might, then suddenly began slavishly licking the rapidly growing and already-roof-breaking squirrel giantess's boots in a miserably failed attempt to remind her about how much he loved her as all of her other audience members immediately threw their arms straight up into the "air" in manic fits of panic and EXTREMELY-frantically fled from the building while screaming for dear life all the while.
"GET out of my WAY, you mediocre burger cooker!" Sandy (who had finally finished growing and therefore was now roughly AT LEAST as tall as the absolute tallest buildings in downtown Bikini Bottom) rather dominantly pointed her right index finger straight down at Spongebob and VERY rudely growled at him, lifting up her right foot as if she was about to stomp on him with said foot as she did so.
"MEDIOCRE?" Spongebob puppy-dog-eyedly sobbed and sniffled as Sandy more-or-less-instantaneously smashed the entire Bikini Bottom Comedy Club surrounding him and her into downright pitiful little pieces using her various karate moves and then immediately began going on an increasingly-obviously mind-control-induced Godzilla rampage through downtown Bikini Bottom, destroying quite nearly everything in her path (except for Spongebob, Spongebob’s rather distinctly yellow-and-porous-paint-job-sporting Boat-Mobile, and Spongebob’s pineapple house, interestingly enough) as she did so while said downtown area's residents immediately got into their boring old normal-looking Boat-Mobiles (and whatnot) and drove away from her as quickly as they possibly could.
"Stupid worthless cars and whatnot! Who even needs THOSE when you have giant freaking ROBOTS?!" Plankton increasingly-maniacally laughed as he purposefully made Sandy brutally flatten as many Boat-Mobiles (and bikes, buses, et cetera) as possible beneath her boots in the process of her ground-shaking jog through the streets of downtown Bikini Bottom, making especially sure to get rid of the Bikini Bottom Police Department's vehicles (which, barring a scant few undercover ones whose drivers rather surprisingly actually WERE, in fact, smart enough to evacuate Bikini Bottom before it was too late, were all very explicitly labeled as police vehicles due to the general idiocy and arrogance of quite nearly all of said police department's employees, naturally enough) as she did so.
"HEY! Watch where you're going, ya FREAK!" Frank suddenly walked out of his house's front door in an adult baby costume, spat out his pacifier in shock and then VERY angrily yelled at Sandy (looking straight up at her and shaking his rattle at her with his left hand as he did so) after seeing that she had just stepped on his fancy vintage Boat-Mobile and therefore crushed it into pieces.
"Stupid apartment/business towers, always having to look so ridiculously high and mighty! I sure hope they don't mind being CHOPPED down to size!" Plankton INCREDIBLY-hypocritically laughed as he made Sandy horizontally karate-chop several of Bikini Bottom's tallest buildings (all of which were indeed apartment/business towers) in half, causing their rather thoroughly sliced-off top halves to thunderously crash onto the ground as a result while Spongebob desperately chased after her in his OWN Boat-Mobile, deftly maneuvering his way past all KINDS of vehicle/building wreckage as he did so.
"HMPH! This is EXACTLY what these freaking hypocritical idiots DESERVE for treating me as if I'm somehow not ALLOWED to function as a normal member of aquatic society! Let's see how freaking nice their houses are NOW!" Plankton downright ego-maniacally and VERY enviously sneered as he made Sandy brutally kick and stomp nearly every single house in Bikini Bottom (except for her TreeDome, Spongebob’s aforementioned pineapple house and the Chum Bucket, of course) into rubble.
"Maybe THIS will get Mr. Krabs to finally join forces with me once and for all!" Plankton hatefully growled as he made Sandy wildly wave her arms (not to mention her fists) up and down and repeatedly jump on top of the Krusty Krab (as if she was throwing a physical temper tantrum in order to represent his mental one) until there was absolutely nothing left of it except for its "secret formula" safe (which, amazingly enough, was so obscenely durable that it actually HADN'T been broken by Sandy's tantrum; in fact, it had barely even been DENTED at all).
"OH, NO! WHAT HAVE I DONE, WHAT HAVE I DONE, WHAT HAVE I DO-HO-HO-HONE?!" Spongebob self-blamingly screamed and cried as he frantically drove his Boat-Mobile straight to (what was left of) the Krusty Krab, only to find that Sandy had indeed already finished her rampage by the time that he had finally managed to catch her.
"WAAAH HAA HAA HAA HAAAH!" Sandy suddenly (not to mention thunderously and ground-shakingly) got down onto her knees, pressed her palms against the front of her helmet and began hopelessly crying and wailing like a sad little baby as Spongebob pulled out a megaphone from the front pockets of his pants and then immediately began using it to try to talk to her and hopefully comfort her in the process.
"SANDY, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, PLEASE JUST FREAKING TELL ME ALREADY; HOW IN THE ACTUAL HELL IS YOU BEING MOCKED AT A FREAKING COMEDY CLUB NOW SUDDENLY ABLE TO PROVOKE YOU INTO DOING SOMETHING LIKE THIS?!" Spongebob EXTREMELY-furiously-and-confusedly yelled at Sandy through his megaphone while said squirrel lady suddenly removed her hands from her helmet and then clinically-depressedly looked down at him in response, still ever-so-pitifully crying, sobbing and sniffling as she did so.
"I DON'T WANNA FREAKING TALK ABOUT IT, OKAY?! PLEASE JUST FREAKING GO AWAY ALREADY, WOULD YOU PLEASE?!" Sandy VERY childishly jumped up and down yet again and ever-so-humiliatedly-and-frustratedly screamed at Spongebob while Plankton then suddenly made her blatantly-responsibility-fleeingly and EXTREMELY-thunderously run straight back over to her TreeDome with her crying face once again miserably buried beneath her hands (and, of course, her helmet) in what increasingly-clearly appeared to be a very genuinely manic fit of insecurity-and-paranoia-induced insanity.
As for the aforementioned Bikini Bottom police, they could already pretty clearly tell, despite their generally immense idiocy, that Sandy was indeed being mind-controlled by Plankton (due to her remarkably robotic-looking movements during her rampage, her rather oddly specific refusal to destroy the Chum Bucket despite the fact that she had utterly decimated the Krusty Krab, the fact that a person suddenly growing to Godzilla size for literally no reason simply wasn’t possible, and most especially her COMPLETELY out-of-character attempt to quite literally break the Krabby Patty secret formula’s protective safe open, of course) but were just too lazy and quite frankly too cowardly to actually do anything about said problem.
YET ANOTHER HALF-HOUR LAY-TERR, IN THE BATHROOM OF SANDY'S TREEDOME (HER TREEHOUSE, TO BE MORE PRECISE), AFTER PLANKTON HAD FINALLY SHRUNK HER, HIM AND HER SUIT BACK DOWN TO THEIR NORMAL SIZES (USING HER BRAIN CONTROL COCKPIT’S AFOREMENTIONED “SIZE” KNOB, OF COURSE) IN ORDER TO ENABLE HER TO ENTER SAID TREEDOME WHILE SPONGEBOB DROVE HIS WAY OVER TO IT USING HIS BOAT-MOBILE…
"Sandy, PLEASE tell me what's wrong, I'm BEGGING you! You've been acting so freaking crazy and WEIRD lately that I quite frankly haven’t even known how to freaking RESPOND to some of your recent behavior! Did that ear tick of yours somehow manage to lay eggs in your freaking BRAIN or something? Seriously, Sandy, I NEED to know; WHAT in the actual HELL is your freaking PROBLEM?!" Spongebob (who was now once again wearing his water helmet, of course) desperately and increasingly-frustratedly begged the now-once-again-suitless-and-bikini-clad Sandy as she rather hastily and fearfully gulped down yet another Gill Pill while a rather intimidatingly large chunk of the rest of Bikini Bottom's remaining population immediately began VERY intently approaching her TreeDome on foot from literally every possible direction, carrying exactly EIGHT absolutely MASSIVE battering rams with which they were now VERY clearly planning to strike said dome on all eight "sides" of its outer rim in one great big "Zerg Rush" attack as they did so.
"Spongebob, there's something that I've been trying to tell you for quite some time now..." Sandy rather shifty-eyedly began explaining to Spongebob, suddenly re-growing her incredibly plot-convenient neck gills RIGHT in the nick(elodeon) of time as the numerous "soldiers" in Mr. Krabs' personal army finally reached the outer rim of her TreeDome and increasingly-eagerly readied themselves to hit said dome (and therefore break it) with their aforementioned battering rams.
"You see, the little demon who just so happens to be controlling my brain from the inside right now...is...h-his name is..." Sandy got down onto her left knee, cupped her hands around one of Spongebob's numerous (left) ear holes and began increasingly-nervously whispering into said hole...but alas, surely enough, her explanation was once again cut short at quite literally the last possible second as Plankton suddenly cranked her submissive-ness level all the way up to its absolute maximum possible setting yet again, somehow making her too SHY (rather than too arrogant) to actually admit (in a non-vague manner, at least) that Plankton had indeed snuck into her brain and (rather ironically) completely outsmarted her in the process (mostly because she was quite frankly beginning to very strongly suspect that Plankton would indeed brutally rip said brain apart from the inside as punishment if she actually DID, in fact, tell anyone else about her increasingly ignominious defeat by him and therefore reveal the fact that he, indeed, was quite literally inside her head).
"HEAVE...HOOOOOOOOO!" Mr. Krabs and his numerous Bikini Bottomite “soldiers” surprisingly-valiantly yelled at the tops of their lungs, simultaneously and repeatedly slamming all eight of their battering rams directly into Sandy's TreeDome at full force (not to mention "from all eight compass directions") as they did so until, surely enough, they actually managed to COMPLETELY shatter said dome (also breaking the limit of how much damage it was able to self-repair in the process, naturally enough), thunderously and ground-shakingly setting their battering rams down atop the VERY clearly grass-indicated outer edge of said dome's floor in a way/arrangement that deliberately covered as much of said outer floor edge as possible (after fiercely battering-ramming the place's front doors down and thoroughly covering said outer floor edge with literal bucket-loads of water-proof "world's strongest" super-glue, no less) immediately afterward just to be EXTRA-sure that said dome wouldn't be able to regenerate itself while Sandy and Spongebob increasingly-reluctantly walked out into Sandy's yard and then immediately began horrifiedly (not to mention helplessly) trembling in response to the downright-RIDICULOUSLY angry mob that was now surrounding them.
"Um, G-GUYS? Y-You DO k-know that I actually w-wasn't even t-technically in c-control of my own f-freaking ACTIONS when I d-destroyed your b-buildings, v-vehicles and what-n-not, RIGHT?" Sandy sweatily, shifty-eyedly, wobbly-kneedly, stammeringly and generally-extremely-nervously asked the Bikini Bottomites with an ever-so-adorably-fake smile on her face, folding her arms behind her back and VERY meekly crossing her legs as she did so while Spongebob suddenly removed his water helmet and then inexplicably slipped it into the back pockets of his pants as if it was literally nothing.
"Yeah, and I suppose that WE aren't going to be in control of our KICKING OF YOUR FREAKING ASS, are we?" Squidward ever-so-smugly-and-condescendingly shrugged his shoulders and INCREDIBLY-snarkily quipped while the rest of the Bikini Bottomites nodded their heads in unison and extremely-loudly cheered "OF COURSE WE ARE" in agreement.
"Um, C-CITIZENS? Can we P-PLEASE just s-settle this l-like civilized and NON-b-barbaric people? P-Pretty PLEASE?" Spongebob performed a rather distinct "jazz hands" gesture and increasingly-fearfully stammered, slowly backing away from the Bikini Bottomites in front of himself as he did so while both them and the additional Bikini Bottomites BEHIND him (not to mention generally around him) slowly but surely began creeping their way closer and closer to him and Sandy.
"Spongebob, for Neptune’s sake, PLEASE just get the hell out of here already; this doesn't even freaking CONCERN you, disregarding your lovey-dovey CRUSH on this psychotic bitch!" Mr. Krabs rudely (but rather understandably) commanded Spongebob, then began childishly and EXTREMELY-hypocritically mocking him for his incredibly mushy "boyfriend/girlfriend" relationship with Sandy.
"Spongebob and Sandy, sitting in a tree; K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Patrick obnoxiously sang, amazingly being able to actually spell the word "kissing" correctly as he did so while Squidward, Sandy and (especially) Spongebob exasperatedly rolled their eyes in response.
"Oh, SHUT UP, Patrick!" Spongebob embarrassedly shook his right fist at Patrick and yelled at him.
"Anyway, Sandy, the REAL question here is this: what would you like to have us do to you as a substitute for us actually killing you? Personally, if I were you, I would probably choose the "death" option at this point, just between you and me..." Squidward shrugged his shoulders and ever-so-boredly-and-depressedly explained to Sandy while Plankton immediately and FAR-too-excitedly began cranking her sexual sluttish-ness level all the way up to its absolute maximum possible setting in response.
"Oh, I do believe that I've got JUST the thing for YOU guys...you freaking horny little DEVILS..." Sandy suddenly went cross-eyed (although thankfully only for a few seconds) and began incredibly-seductively-and-sluttishly teasing the Bikini Bottomites surrounding her as she very slowly and gracefully removed her already extremely revealing clothes (as in her bra, underwear and skirt, basically), leaving her utterly gorgeous naked body fully exposed for everyone around her to see (tits, vagina and all) while said Bikini Bottomites immediately began love-strickenly panting and drooling in response (not to mention absolute amazement).
"Nothing to see here, people; move along!" Squidward sarcastically chuckled, wiping the Sandy-induced nose blood off of his face with his arms as he did so.
"Now THAT right there is what I call the type of beauty that money can't buy! WHEET-WOO!" Mr. Krabs uproariously laughed (and then wolf-whistled at Sandy).
"I think I have a stiffie." Patrick rather flatly stated while the fellow Bikini Bottomites surrounding him speechlessly nodded their heads in agreement.
"I wanna die..." Spongebob rather relatably hung his head in absolute shame and dejectedly sighed as his fellow Bikini Bottomites increasingly-eagerly readied themselves to rape Sandy utterly senseless, shambling their way toward her like zombies and even mindlessly DROOLING like zombies as they did so; needless to say, Plankton was already having the time of his life in the control cockpit of Sandy's poor, POOR brain as he FAR-too-proudly readied himself to downright-FURIOUSLY masturbate as if he would quite literally NEVER get another chance to do so.
AFTER ALL OF THE BIKINI BOTTOMITES SURROUNDING SANDY (INCLUDING SPONGEBOB, PATRICK, SQUIDWARD AND MR. KRABS, OF COURSE) HAD FINALLY FINISHED STRIPPING THEMSELVES NAKED SO THAT THEIR CLOTHES WOULDN'T GET IN THE WAY OF THEIR RATHER WEIRDLY INTENSE DESIRE TO HAVE SEX WITH SANDY CHEEKS...
"OHH, YEAAAH...HERE WE GO, BITCH..." Plankton ever-so-pervertedly drooled, panted and moaned with delight, opening up the "pants" compartment of his suit and then immediately beginning to furiously stroke his micro-cock with his right hand yet again while the massive crowd of Bikini Bottomites surrounding Sandy finally decided, once and for all, to straight-up FUCK her.
"MY, MY...now THAT'S what I call digging for gold..." Plankton continued moaning with delight as Mr. Krabs laid Sandy face-up on the ground, tightly grabbed her meaty and juicy thighs with his claws, and then finally began ever-so-greedily digging his way into said squirrel lady's vagina with his inexplicably extendable tongue, licking it almost-spotlessly clean as he did so while Sandy VERY loudly and orgasmically moaned in response.
"OHHH, SWEET BLOODY HEAVENS, IT'S SO IRRESISTIBLY DELICIOUS!" Mr. Krabs loudly cried in a fit of pure joy as he ravenously slurped up every last drop of Sandy's freshly ejaculated and utterly delicious pussy juice, causing Plankton to somehow become even MORE envious of said crab as a result while said squirrel lady ecstatically threw her head WAY back and downright-ear-splittingly shrieked with arousal in response to the massive vaginal orgasm that said crab had just given her.
"Now THAT is one AWFULLY big son-OF-a-bitch right there..." Plankton blushingly (not to mention hungrily) licked his lips and increasingly-excitedly laughed as Patrick violently forced Sandy onto her hands and knees and then immediately began ramming his ridiculously huge and violently throbbing penis directly into the ever-so-adorably dainty and soft little hole between Sandy's big fat (ass) cheeks.
"FINLAND!" Patrick overjoyedly yelled at the tops of his ever-loving lungs as his penis shot out numerous gooey, creamy and sticky streams of cum into Sandy's mesmerizingly plump and curvy butt, causing both him and Sandy alike to dizzily sway back and forth and rather absent-mindedly drool with pleasure.
"OOH...It's just like one of my Japanese ANIMES..." Plankton dizzily and sweatily whispered to himself, beginning to stroke his tiny green dick even harder (not to mention faster, and with his left hand instead of his right) as Squidward suddenly walked right up in front of Sandy and then immediately began wholesomely wrapping his ever-so-delightfully slimy and moist tentacles around her irresistibly beautiful naked body, even going as far as to forcefully-yet-gracefully shove his intensely pulsating penis (as in the one between his legs, not the one on his face) straight up into her wonderfully cozy and fleshy vagina while ever-so-delicately-and-lovingly tongue-kissing her as he did so.
"Please forgive us for not using condoms for this..." Squidward shockingly-politely begged Sandy as she rather hilariously shoved the entirety of his nose (in other words, the dick on his face) into her mouth and began wholesomely sucking on it while the dick between his legs squirted out scrumptiously thick rivulets of squid semen into her deliciously dainty little mammal minge.
"Would somebody PLEASE just freaking PINCH me already? For Neptune’s sake, I must be DREAMING right now!" Plankton ever-so-merrily laughed as Sandy increasingly-obediently got down onto her knees and began passionately sucking on Spongebob's cock, ever-so-teasingly looking up at him with her eyes and rather surprisingly-girlishly fluttering her eyelashes at him as she did so.
"Uhh...t-THANK you, S-Sandy...tee hee hee...that, uhh, t-tickles quite a b-bit..." Spongebob awkwardly, nervously, shifty-eyedly and rather embarrassedly giggled as Sandy meticulously licked all over his veiny, spongy shaft with her tongue and lovingly massaged it with her lips before then finally biting down on said shaft with her buck teeth while ever-so-playfully tickling and squeezing his nut sack with her left hand; needless to say, the result of this was rather orgasmic to say the LEAST.
"SWEET MOTHER OF JELLYFISH..." Spongebob overjoyedly gasped in astonishment as his penis uncontrollably began spurting out every last bit of built-up sea sponge semen that it had to offer into Sandy's eagerly awaiting mouth, causing him to exhaustedly (albeit incredibly lovingly) faint onto the ground as his cum supply was indeed CUM-PLETELY depleted.
"Holy maggot-infested SHIT; these guys really are downright-INSANELY desperate for something to fuck, aren’t they?!" Plankton increasingly-disgustedly gasped in absolute disbelief as the rest of the Bikini Bottomites INCREDIBLY-shamelessly began dog-piling themselves on top of Sandy and fucking her in literally every single way imaginable, to the point where even PLANKTON (of all people) was actually beginning to very seriously object to the quite frankly APPALLINGLY complete lack of moral decency in their (sexual) behavior; luckily, however, said micro-organism was indeed already fapping so ridiculously hard to said utter degeneracy that he STILL didn't even really care about how VERY truly awful and despicable it was.
"YEE-HAW!" Sandy overjoyedly yelled with delight as she gave a halibut a handjob, treated a haddock to another handjob, provided Frank with a footjob, got her clitoris stimulated by a catfish, allowed Barnacle Boy to suck on her breasts, let a pair of escolar(s) ejaculate directly into her ear canals, inserted a mackerel's penis directly into her mouth, generally made everyone around her ejaculate all over her as if there was quite literally no tomorrow, et cetera, et cetera, ad nauseam.
ONE ABSOLUTELY UNBELIEVABLE AMOUNT OF UTTER DEPRAVITY LAY-TERR...
"Oh, COME ON; seriously, what in the actual FUCK is wrong with these people?" Plankton nauseatedly (and also rather hypocritically) groaned in downright-extreme disgust as Squidward and Squilliam, after making the already-completely-cum-drenched-from-head-to-toe Sandy ever-so-submissively get down onto her knees for them, used their bare hands to yank her eyeballs right out of their sockets (causing said eyeballs to rather grotesquely dangle back and forth while their optic nerve cords just BARELY kept them attached to said sockets, naturally enough) so that the two of them could THEN proceed to increasingly-violently thrust their (crotch) penises directly into said eye sockets until FINALLY, at long last, Sandy had officially been fucked in what Plankton personally considered to be undoubtedly THE most absolutely repulsive way in which he had ever seen someone be fucked in his entire (utterly pathetic joke of a) life.
"JEEZ, do you THINK that MAYBE we should just leave this poor girl alone now? I mean, COME ON; she CLEARLY is NOT mentally stable! Like, AT ALL!" Spongebob BEYOND-revoltedly scolded his fellow Bikini Bottomites, gently putting Sandy's eyeballs back into their sockets (where they belonged) as he did so while said poor, POOR (squirrel) girl exhaustedly fainted onto the ground and became completely unconscious from how downright-OBSCENELY brutally she had just been gang-raped by said Bikini Bottomites.
"BOY, you sure can say THAT again!" Plankton rather worriedly agreed as he suddenly began to VERY genuinely notice just how much the internal condition of Sandy's brain was already quite-visibly deteriorating as a blatantly direct result of her rather clearly ongoing physical and mental abuse; her neuron wires were very clearly starting to become an extremely tangled mess, and her brain tissue itself was also beginning to rather quickly rot due to the fact that Plankton had made serving as his mindless slave her only actual purpose in life. Despite secretly feeling almost as bad for the poor, POOR thing as Spongebob and Karen did, however, Plankton just didn't know when to stop when it came to being evil; in fact, to make a (rather ludicrously-excessively) long story short, he was quite frankly utterly insane himself.
"Well, I suppose that we HAVE pretty much milked her completely dry by now..." Squidward increasingly-self-loathingly sighed while Squilliam downright-horrifiedly nodded his head in agreement.
"What do you MEAN? She's never looked MORE alive to ME!" Patrick crossed his arms over his chest and indignantly pointed out while quite a few of his fellow Bikini Bottomites surprisingly-revoltedly gasped at him in response.
"SHUT UP, PATRICK!" Spongebob shook his right fist at Patrick and VERY furiously screamed at him.
"FINE! I suppose I WILL, then! HMPH!" Patrick continued crossing his arms over his chest and annoyedly grumbled, rolling his eyes as he did so while Spongebob rolled his OWN eyes, shrugged his shoulders and increasingly-exasperatedly thought “with friends like these” to himself in response.
"You know what? Just...just do whatever you want with her, but please don't blame US if/when the freaking crazy bitch ends up brutally attacking you and/or trying to steal all of your money, okay?" Mr. Krabs hung his head in truly immense shame and reluctantly told/warned Spongebob as Sandy suddenly began rather abnormally and presumably-psychological-trauma-inducedly twitching in her sleep.
"Don't worry...I won't..." Spongebob clasped his hands together, hung his OWN head in nearly incalculable shame and exhaustedly sighed, with INCREDIBLY genuine tears trickling their way down his face as he did so.
"Come on guys, let's go..." Mr. Krabs surprisingly-regretfully groaned as he and his fellow Bikini Bottomites (excluding Spongebob and technically Sandy) immediately walked off to who-knows-where (hopefully to downtown Bikini Bottom, so that they could perhaps try to rebuild it), leaving Spongebob and Sandy completely alone in the absolute most soul-crushingly depressing way possible.
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Plankton's Journey To The Brain Of Sandy Cheeks