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SpongeBob SexPants	By : DoctorGryffindor Category: +S through Z > SpongeBob SquarePants Views: 10283 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Spongebob Squarepants, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Chapter Two: Patrick's Rock
"Firmly grasp it!" Patrick shouts at Princess Mindy, who in response, grips his erect pink penis tightly. Princess Mindy is royalty, the mermaid-daughter of King Neptune, the ruler of the sea. Additionally, she is strikingly beautiful, a result of her mother being a siren. She would have no problem finding a handsome Prince Charming-type to sweep her away. So why is it, she thought, that she ended up in such a ratty, low-class place like Patrick's Rock, performing sexual acts on a commoner?
Maybe she was just tired of playing by her father's rules. "Mindy," He would say. "Prince Flounder has travelled all across the Pacific to court you today. Go with him, and do as he wishes." Well Prince Flounder was fifty years old, balding (like her father), and really into butt-stuff. No way would she dare spend the rest of her life with him. But is this really what fuels her frequent urge to sleep with Patrick? No, she thought, it must be something else entirely.
He has the bravery of a knight, of course, having traveled from Shell City to get the crown, save the town, and Mr. Krabs… but in no way does he bear any kind of shining armor. He is fat, to say the least, and smells like dirty socks. And worst of all, his level of intelligence is comparable only to the coral flooring that lined the ballroom in her castle. She is better than this, she thought, and most certainly shouldn't be here. But, on the other hand, Patrick is crazy about her. She knows that her mere presence in his rock, is enough to make him rock-hard. And surprisingly, while he is in no way physically attractive, he loves her gently and tenderly… almost like a teddy bear, if that teddy bear had an eight-inch penis of course. Yes, it was eight-and-some-inches alright, and could last an astonishingly long time. Best of all, Mindy thought to herself, he cuddles afterward. Prince Flounder would never.
And so, she's crouched down, jerking off Patrick Star. Forward, her hand moves up his shaft, and then backward, all the way down. Back and forth, she strokes his cock, as Patrick breathes heavily in uncontainable ecstasy. "Oh, Neptune," Patrick mumbles, causing Mindy to stop her stroking completely.
"Patrick," Mindy says. "What have I told you about saying my dad's name during sex?"
"I'm sorry!" Patrick replies. "You know, some girls are into the whole daddy-thing. I just thought maybe you-"
"Just," She takes a deep breath. "Stop talking." And SHLURP, goes the sound she makes as she engulfs Patrick's penis into her mouth. She sucks him up and down, bobbing her head in a steady, metrical motion. As she continues blowing Patrick, she brings her hand down to the front of her mermaid's tail. By a spell of her mermaid magic, her long tail begins emitting a bright light and millions of sparkles fly out and shimmy down her, revealing human legs where her tail used to be. Now, by her hand, lies a perfectly human pussy. She slides a finger into her precious folds, slipping them in and out at an even pace. "Mmmpffh…" Mindy moans over Patrick's cock as she pleasure herself. As she becomes increasingly more horny, her bobbing on Patrick picks up speed, rapidly.
"Oh, Mindy…." Patrick breathes deeply. "This is so much better than jerking off."
"Oh, I bet," she attempts to say in response, but it is muffled. So, instead she says, "Mmm, mmm, mmpfh." She continues to masturbate, fingering her slippery folds. One finger isn't quite cutting it, she thinks, maybe two will do the trick. While she adds a second player to her pleasure, Patrick lays his hands down on her head, pulling her up and down at an even greater speed.
"Faster, faster, faster!" Patrick shouts. Up and down, goes Mindy's head, and up and down and up… Her eyes flutter mindlessly as she pleasures both herself and Patrick. Shlick, shlick, shlick, shlick. Mindy, who is usually quite apt at thinking, finds herself losing all cognitive function. Her mind seems to only be able to process one word at a time, and currently that word was: fuuuuuuuuuck. Patrick was focused on only one thing as well, unloading in the Princess's mouth. He was getting extremely close. As her sucking reaches maximum speed, Patrick starts to shout, "Oh…. I'm…. gonna…. CUM!" and spluuurt, he does. The still mindless Mindy's mouth is filled with Patrick's warm love and she swallows it all. She's not done working on herself, though.
Mindy finally unlatches her mouth from Patrick's penis as she leans backward and grinds her pussy forward, still fingering herself. "Oh!" she squeals. "Oh! Oh! Oh!" Patrick watches her, breathlessly. She grinds and grinds until finally… she climaxes! "Ahhhh," she exhales, smiling. "Come here and kiss me you big, pink doofus." She hops onto Patrick and straddles him, kissing him deeply. They both fall back onto Patrick's bed as their tongues intertwine with one another. Suddenly, he stops and looks into her eyes, lovingly.
"I love you," Patrick says, much to Mindy's surprise. Not knowing quite how to respond to that, she bites her lip and looks down.
"Well, Patrick, I-"
DING-DONG chimes the doorbell. Mindy thinks to herself, "Whew, saved by the bell!"
"Huh. I didn't know I had a doorbell," Patrick says as Mindy removes herself from him. "I better go see who it is."
"Oh, well," Mindy starts. "I should probably go then." Saddened, Patrick frowns. "Aw, come on, Patrick! You know it wouldn't look good for us to be seen together like this… it could cause a scandal! My dad would kill me." Patrick turns away from her, nodding his head in reluctant agreement. "But, you know what?" He turns back to her. "I love you too." They share a smile with one another. "Now, do you have a back door?"
~ A Few Moments Later ~
DING-DONG. DING-DONG. After around two minutes ringing, Patrick finally answers the door to find his best friend, Spongebob, looking worried. "Uh, hey Spongebob, what's going on?"
Spongebob walks into Patrick's house, shaking his head. "Girls, Patrick,"
"What about them?" Patrick asks.
"I don't get it," Spongebob says. "Growing up, we're taught that girls are icky and gross, but then you get to high school, and all of a sudden… you're supposed to love 'em! It just doesn't make any sense!"
Patrick thinks for a moment before replying, "Uh, I think girls are pretty cool."
"Well, I don't."
Patrick, processing this, gets wide-eyed all at once and backs away from Spongebob. "Oh no, I think I know what this is about."
"What?" asks Spongebob.
"I can't believe this is happening, and to my own best friend!"
"What?!"
"I mean, Squidward, that I can see… but Spongebob! My BFF! How can this be happening to me?!" Patrick wails.
Spongebob, visibly frustrated, yells, "What?! Just tell me!"
Patrick takes a deep breath…. "You're gay."
"Oh, no!" Spongebob shouts. "No, no, no, no… that's not it at all. I mean, not that there's anything wrong with that! But it's just… no… I'm not gay, Patrick."
"Well, how do you know you're not, Spongebob?!" Patrick questions him. "I mean that explains all the bubble-blowing and the way you dress!"
"What's wrong with the way I dress?" Spongebob asks.
"Well, I don't know," Patrick says. "But it definitely doesn't help your case." Patrick starts pacing around. "I just- well, I can't believe this!"
"Patrick," Spongebob says. "I promise you, I'm not gay, okay?"
"And give me one good reason to believe you're not." Patrick replies.
"Because I like Sandy!" As soon as he says it, he covers his mouth. After their day at the beach, he had been unable to keep her off his mind. When he woke up, he would think of her. When he went to sleep, he would dream of her. And when he was in the shower…. No, he couldn't dare think of it. His feelings must be all screwed up. It was strange enough to come to terms with the fact that Sandy was beautiful, but now, another word came to Spongebob's mind and echoed through his head all day long…. Sandy is sexy. He knew it was true and it scared him. Patrick gave him a big hug.
"Oh, thank God," Patrick cries. "I thought that we lost you there, buddy."
"Patrick, there's nothing wrong with being gay."
"Nope, enough about that," Patrick says. "Tell me about Sandy. When did you realize you liked her?"
"Well," Spongebob pondered. "I'm not really sure. I mean, I've always admired her, you know? She's smart, funny, athletic-"
"And sexy!" Patrick shouts.
"Well, yeah," he replies. "That too. I mean, I don't know. The other day, we were at Goo Lagoon, and I just… saw her in a different way." He sits down on Patrick's couch, as he explains. "Almost like I was seeing her for the very first time."
Patrick takes the seat next to him and throws an arm around him, brotherly. "Let me tell you something, Spongebob," He starts. "I think you need to get laid."
"Ew, Patrick-"
"Now, Spongebob, here me out," he continues. "Sandy is a mammal. Those things are hot-blooded… and horny as fuck." At his cursing, Spongebob shifts away uncomfortably. "I think the only real option you have here is to go over to her tree-dome and have sex with her right now."
"But, Patrick," Spongebob says. "I haven't even had my first kiss."
"Then start with that! It's a base-system, Spongebob. You start with base one, move to base two, then pretty soon you've got yourself a touchdown!" Patrick laughs. "Honestly, Spongebob, you should go over there and tell her how you feel."
"Like… ask her on a date?"
"Exactly!" Patrick replies. "But you should do it as soon as you can. I know Larry the Lobsters' had his eyes on her for awhile."
"Oh no!" Spongebob shouts. "You're right. I better go and ask her out while I still have a chance! Thanks Patrick!" He starts out the door but is suddenly stopped by Patrick.
"Wait," He says. "Remember: when in doubt, pinky out." And with that, Spongebob was on his way.
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SpongeBob SexPants