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Thirty Passionate Reasons	By : IrkSplee Category: +S through Z > Total Drama Island Views: 3129 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own any aspect of Total Drama, nor do I make any money from this writing.

Chapter List
- 1-Afterglow
- 2-In Fantasy
- 1
- 2
To answer a question I got in a review - none of the alters will be involved over the course of this fic. It's all about Mike and Zoey. The alters may come out to give their opinions, but they won't be involved in any sex acts.
As for this chapter, it's a lot lighter than the last one - simply Zoey first realizing that she's sexually attracted to Mike.
Prompt: masturbation

Zoey couldn't sleep.
Nothing about her environment had changed. She slept in her own bed, with her own blanket and her own three pillows arranged just the way she liked them. She wore her favorite silk pajamas, drank her usual caffeine-free citrus tea not long before, and had settled down at the same hour she always did. To all the world, there seemed to be no factor contributing to her inability to rest.
However, one fact sat on her mind that wasn't always true, a fact that made her smile to herself in the dark and excited her too much to want to sleep.
Mike was coming over the next day.
The pair both knew what they were getting into when they agreed to keep their relationship going even after leaving Wawanakwa. It sounded simple enough to Zoey at first; it wasn't as if she'd ever had a regular physical relationship anyway, so the lack of physical contact shouldn't have bothered her.
And yet, it did. It wasn't that she was unsatisfied with the phone calls and Internet chats; on the contrary, she came to look forward to those every day and hated the rare days when they didn't take place. But still, some days, she found herself wishing for a little bit more. Even the little things, like how he always rested his hand on hers when they sat next to each other or how she liked petting his hair before waking him up when he slept in too long, left a void when she went too long without. She could always see and hear him, but she still hated the lack of the slightest touch except for those rare weekends when neither of them had anything going on and could therefore stop by for a day or two.
But tomorrow would start one of those weekends. He didn't even have any appointments that day; the second school let out, he'd drive right out to be with her for the next two nights.
Zoey smiled wider and pulled the blanket tighter around herself as his smiling face filled her mind. She obviously couldn't forget his face, but she could see him particularly clearly as he was just an hour ago when they talked over the webcam. No matter what inane thing they chose to talk about, even if a silence had settled while they browsed on their own for a while, his excited grin never faded during that conversation. And if the silence went on too long, he'd fill it with the reason for his unending smile.
“I get to see you tomorrow.”
She was sure she smiled just as much as he did, but that she couldn't possibly match his expression. She wasn't sure what, but something about her always made him give that exaggerated smile. Whether she spoke to him, hugged him, leaned against him... he was probably the only boy who laughed when kissed in a sensitive area like his neck, not from ticklishness, but from sheer joy to be by his girlfriend's side.
She always loved that enthusiasm.
It didn't just show in his face, either; he was equally enthusiastic when they got their rare opportunities to show physical affection. His love for her always showed in the way he hugged her tight, the way he peppered her lips with constant shallow kisses, the way his hands would travel down her body, savoring every inch of her sides and back, until coming to an abrupt stop at her lower back, right before reaching a more intimate area...
What if, just once, he didn't stop...?
Her face grew hot as she considered that possibility... but no, he wouldn't. He wasn't that type of guy. Mike clearly loved it when he got to touch her, but his excitement always stopped with her comfort. He'd never do anything that could possibly make her uncomfortable.
But what if I told him I wouldn't mind?
Zoey shook that whole concept from her mind. How could she just come out and ask about something like that, anyway? That sort of thing was just embarrassing.
Instead, she decided to change her mental image of her interactions with Mike. Her mind's eye filled with the picture of Mike lying in bed beside her, with his arms wrapped around her waist. The pair didn't need to move as they cuddled like this; they simply sat still and enjoyed the other's presence, just as Zoey liked it. She'd cuddle up to his chest and bask in how warm his body always felt. She'd press her ear against his heart and listen to its steady rhythm; sometimes, when Mike called her in a panic and needed to be calmed down, it would flutter erratically and scare her senseless, but for the sake of her fantasy, she chose to imagine the slow, relaxing beat that would often lull her to sleep. She'd breathe in the scent of spice his skin always held. She'd moan in quiet pleasure as one of his hands danced through her hair. She'd press herself closer to him, inwardly begging him to pull her up and softly kiss her face, or maybe firmly press his mouth against hers, hold her tighter, refuse to break the kiss, drape one long, skinny leg over her hips and squeeze her close-
If he held me like that I bet I'd feel his-
Zoey pulled the blanket over her head to hide her deepening blush from the world. Where did that thought come from? She'd never noticed that sort of reaction from Mike before; she wasn't sure if they'd never before cuddled in a position that would reveal it, or if he wasn't into her enough for that.
Then again, there were a few times when he'd hold her, then suddenly jump up, excuse himself, and make a mad, clumsy run for the bathroom...
She tried her best to rewind that particular fantasy to a less personal position. Just her listening to his heartbeat while his hands drifted through her hair, then his fingers brushed against her neck, then his palms rubbed her shoulders... one hand would slip down from her shoulder and take a button of her pajama top between two shaking fingers-
Zoey's breathing hitched as she squeezed her legs together. She was no stranger to attraction, as the many band guys she'd taken an interest in had proved over her teenage years, but this was the first time her thoughts got so personal. It wasn't that she actively disliked the idea of being physically fawned over by a guy, but due to the lack of romance in her life, there was no one specific to place in that role in her head. But now she had Mike, who doted over her with every fiber of his being. He was much too wary of her boundaries to comfortably risk passing her limits, Zoey assumed, but she also assumed that he'd touch and kiss her in any way she pleased if she only asked.
Would it be okay to ask?
She took a deep breath and rolled over onto her back as she thought that over. What would happen if she asked him to go a little further with her? How much would she be willing to do with him?
Her mind went back to his shaking fingers on the button of her pajamas. He'd kneel over her with that smile on his face, but his body's tremors and his unsteady breathing would reveal how nervous this made him. Of course he'd be nervous; the boy made an unearthly squeaking sound and nearly passed out on her couch a few of the first times she kissed his mouth. She couldn't even imagine how awkward he'd be if she let him get this close. The way he appeared in her head right now possibly gave him too much credit, but then, for the sake of fantasy, things worked out a lot better if he could actually function.
“You're sure this is all right?” he'd ask, his voice shaking as hard as his hand, a small squeak punctuating his sentence. Zoey's emotions right then hit somewhere between a giggle and a swoon. Mike may have been awkward and unsure at times, but she'd take this over some smooth talking band frontman any day. He was the bravest guy she ever knew – he had to be to experience everything he did and still have the will to keep fighting for both himself and for her – and yet he still turned into a scared, quaking puddle whenever they did something physical for the first time, for fear that he'd mess up and disappoint her.
While she hoped to set him at ease about that someday, she had to admit, he was kind of adorable when he smiled nervously like that.
She'd nod in response to his question, and maybe cup his face in her hand to assure him further. He'd lovingly nuzzle his cheek against her palm, then slowly move his other hand to her shirt.
Zoey closed her eyes and pictured him undressing her while in reality, she worked on unbuttoning her shirt. While her fingers worked deftly, having maneuvered this shirt so many times before, she knew Mike would go much slower than this. His trembling would cause him to take a few tries at each button before finally freeing it from the hole, and two or three buttons down, he'd pause. He wouldn't say why, but Zoey knew he'd freeze there, for one more button would begin to expose her chest. If he did pause, she'd gently rub her hand against his face. If that didn't assure him, she'd whisper to him.
“It's okay. Please continue...”
Hopefully, that would comfort him enough to make him continue. How would he react once he saw her topless, she wondered? She could only hope it'd be positive. Maybe like the first time he saw her in a skirt... he'd swallow hard, then start breathing heavy. He'd mumble a compliment, like “so pretty”, as his smile grew impossibly wider. Zoey sat up to remove her unbuttoned shirt; in her mind, Mike lifted her by her shoulders and gently kissed the side of her neck while he slid the fabric down her arms. In both versions, her shirt ended up discarded on the floor once it was removed, where it would be ignored for the remainder of the night. After she laid back down, her memory recalled Mike's nervous squeak once more. His eyes would lock on to her breasts, and that breathing would continue, oh, those heavy breaths, who gave him the right to throw her emotions into such a frenzy with something as simple as breathing?
Zoey's legs squeezed together again, and a small groan escaped from her lips. She was no stranger to tending to her body's needs when her hormones flared up, but very rarely would such an act involve a mental image. Normally, it was simply something relaxing she'd do to help herself sleep. And even on those rare times that she'd call an attractive man into her head, it was simply a static image. She never dwelt on acts, and she certainly never included herself in the image. Would it feel different if she did?
Her mental image froze a moment before Mike could touch her, with one hand hovered inches above her breast. She couldn't decide whether it froze there because Mike probably would, or if she had difficulty bringing the fantasy any further than that. Was it really okay to think about stuff like this? What would Mike think if he knew?
Did Mike think about this, too?
How would she feel if she knew what he thought about?
When did the room start feeling so hot? When did it get so difficult to breathe?
Zoey hovered her own hand above her chest to match the picture she'd formed. She could have sworn she was used to doing something like this, but the idea of someone – someone she knew so well, at that – helping her out gave everything a brand new context. With a deep breath, both she and her fantasy lowered their hand onto her right breast and gently closed their fingers around it. She closed her eyes and did her best to distance herself from reality. She didn't want to be the one doing this; she wanted Mike to come here, to kiss her lips and neck and shoulders and wherever else he wanted while his fingers paid gentle service to her chest. She moved her left hand to her other breast, and while her right hand's movements involved rubbing her fingertips into her flesh, her left hand instead lightly brushed her fingers over her nipple. She put her own hand out of her mind; instead of her fingers stimulating her nipple with light, fleeting touches, Mike had dipped his head lower and begun circling his soft, wet tongue around it. Then he latched his mouth onto her and sucked, occasionally flicking his tongue against her, all while his hand rubbed her other breast.
“Mike...” Zoey whispered to the air. “I love you, Mike...” It was only recently that she began to claim to love him, rather than using early attraction words such as “like” and “crush”. The phrase still felt foreign on her tongue, as if it was something she shouldn't have been saying yet.
The only way to get used to it, she supposed, was to keep on saying it.
“I love you, I love you, I love you...” Her hands would disappear into his thick mess of hair as she professed her love for him over and over again. They'd be past that awkward stage where she wasn't sure she should say it and he wasn't used to hearing it; if anything, her promises would encourage him to move faster and coax out more claims.
“I love you so much, Mike...” His name rolled so easily off her tongue, as if she was meant to say it so lovingly. Meant to whisper it, moan it, scream it; any way he wanted to hear her. What if he did want to get more than a whisper from her? He might run his hand down over her stomach, still shaking against her skin, until stopping on her hip, with the heel of his hand rested against the waistband of her pants. He'd move back up to her mouth, and after a short but firm kiss, he'd half-whisper, half-moan against her lips.
“I love you too, Zoey.”
Oh, what she wouldn't have given in that moment to know what it sounded like to hear him moan her name.
His other hand would move off her breast and follow the first one's path toward her waist, and as that image played, this time, she followed the imagined trail. His likely hesitation showed better this time around. He'd occasionally stop moving as it once again dawned on him that he was actually touching her bare skin. He'd look into her eyes for a reminder that this was really okay for him to do, and after she nodded and smiled, he'd smile back, maybe laugh the way he always did when happily excited, and then continue touching her.
He always started off so timid whenever they tried a new step in their physical relationship. Zoey couldn't imagine him as any different if they tried something like this, and she couldn't even bring herself to want to.
Her original intention when she began this line of thought was for her hand – and therefore Mike's – to reach for her other hip, but a dull ache between her legs demanded otherwise. Mike would never do such a thing without her asking first and him asking ten times if she was sure that was what she wanted, but for the sake of giving her mind and body what they needed, she'd jump right to the part where he actually tried it.
She pressed her fingers between her legs, and right away, her mind switched to Mike holding a kiss with her as his fingers teased her. Two layers of fabric separated her from the sensation, but it was still a good way to ease into more... if she wanted more, anyway... she'd decide that later. For now, she was more than satisfied by the idea of Mike rubbing her most sensitive area like this.
No other boy could ever dare to suggest that he do this to her, but Zoey would invite Mike to try this in a single nervous heartbeat.
It would probably feel so much different if it was really his hand... his hand was so much bigger than hers, so that on its own would provide a different sensation, she imagined. Plus, he didn't know her body as well as she did, so his movements would be clumsy and unsure as he tried to figure out what she liked.
But once he found that sweet spot and triggered her to moan into his kiss, he'd focus there; she was sure of it. She'd kiss him deeper and press herself against his fingers, requesting with her motions that he stay in that spot and press even harder.
His other hand would still be on her hip during this, she remembered. What if he got really into this and decided he wanted more? Maybe he'd slide his fingers into her waistband and start pulling down, moving slowly enough that she'd have time to protest if this wasn't what she wanted... but she had no reason at all to protest. If anything, she'd reposition herself to help him undress her easier.
Zoey's heart rate spiked as she pulled off her pants and underwear in one movement. Without her actively willing it, her mind followed along with her pattern of matching her environment with actions from Mike, and the clear image of Mike pulling her pants down and staring as he exposed her hit her more suddenly than she was ready for. Just last night, she'd never dreamed of sharing more than a kiss with a boy, and now here she was, imagining her boyfriend admiring her naked body with widened eyes and a growing smile that suggested he wanted to do much more than look.
This was so quick. This was so wrong. She wasn't supposed be thinking about this.
Mike dragged his fingers up the inside of her thigh as he told her how beautiful he always thought her legs were.
She was going to keep thinking about this.
Zoey held her breath as she brought her fingers over her clit. This normally didn't feel good enough compared to when she'd leave her pants on to be worth it, but Mike's smiling face in her mind added a surge of emotion that transformed this into an experience she'd never felt before. Her hand lightly brushed against her clit over and over again, with her fingers trembling even harder than she'd imagined Mike's. Irrational fears seeped into her thoughts, almost blocking off her view of her boyfriend. Her door was locked, but what if someone was to somehow walk in and catch her doing this? What if seeing Mike tomorrow made her feel awkward, now that she'd thought of him this way? What if she acted differently enough around him that he could tell what she'd done? What if it made him feel embarrassed?
What if he liked the idea? What if they could get privacy? What if, the second he found out about her desires, he came upstairs with her to make them come true?
The breath Zoey held came out harshly from a combination of that possibility and her fingers rubbing against her flesh in just the right way. Mike would laugh at the noise and kiss her again as he moved his hand in the same way, drawing another gasp from her lips. Zoey's free fist closed around her bedsheets as she pressed against her clit – as Mike pressed against her clit, oh why couldn't this have been him – and in her head, she had the back of his shirt bunched up in both of her hands. Normally, she'd never even consider just pulling his shirt off. She knew the stress that would cause him, especially if she caught him by surprise instead of letting him do it slowly and prepare for whatever it was that crossed his mind when faced with a trigger. Her fantasy froze for a moment as she tried to decide what to do. Would undressing him in her head when he couldn't handle it in reality be considered disrespectful?
But then, she knew he wished he could do simple things like this without having to worry about any consequences...
For the sake of her thoughts, she pretended that Vito could be easily kept at bay, just as she was sure they both wanted. Mike would sit up as she pulled his shirt off, allowing her a view of his strong chest. He may have looked frail when clothed, but Zoey could tell when he hugged her tight that he was much stronger than he looked, and that strength shone through his built pecs and prominent abs. She wanted to run her hands over his muscles as his hand made a hard, final press into her clit before sliding down to stroke her lips between his middle and forefinger.
Her swollen lower lips had become slick with her fluids over the course of all this. Her fear built again for a moment – would he think this was disgusting? But that fear was assuaged by the image of him smiling and kissing her once again. He'd never react negatively to a single thing about her body. Instead, he'd tell her how soft and warm she felt, and maybe ask her if he really made her feel good enough for her body to react like this. She'd nod and make a small moaning sound to confirm her pleasure. In reality, without even thinking about it, she had started moaning as she stroked herself. This felt way better than it had any right to. She caught herself before her voice grew too loud, but if she was alone with Mike, she wondered if she'd let her voice go without any attempt at restraint. What if he liked when she made sounds like that? If he did, he wouldn't miss an opportunity to tell her how pretty she sounded, and he'd encourage her to keep going and ask what he had to do to make her keep making those pretty moans.
Pretty, or even... Zoey blushed at the next thing she imagined him telling her.
“You sound so sexy.”
No one had ever called her that before, not even mockingly. It wasn't as if she needed that sort of approval from people she didn't care about anyway, but she'd never had reason to think that anyone could see her that way. Even the thought of Mike calling her sexy seemed unbelievable. He'd given her plenty of compliments on her appearance – cute, pretty, beautiful – but never, never sexy. Could he have possibly thought she was?
Maybe he did, but thought saying so would make her uncomfortable...
She tried the word again. “You have a sexy body,” he'd say, a hint of arousal in his voice – what did he sound like when he was aroused? She was dying to know that – before running his finger up and down between her lower lips and moving his mouth down to lick her nipple again. She'd keep stroking his firm abs with one hand, and let the other explore the rest of his exposed torso. Give one of his broad shoulders a tight squeeze, then run her fingertips down his spine. Press her hand flat against his upper back so she could feel the way his muscles moved as he sat up to smile at her, then moved back down to kiss her other breast. Slide her hand down his stomach until her fingertips hit the waistband of his briefs and make him groan in anticipation against her skin.
She had to admit, she found him pretty sexy herself.
First, she wondered how Mike would want to be touched if she were to move her hand lower. Second, she wondered why she would wonder that in the first place. But then, if he touched her, it was only fair of her to return the favor, wasn't it?
And maybe she was curious about what it felt like...
But what would it feel like? She knew guys were described as “hard” when aroused, but she couldn't translate that into a tactile sensation. She also had no idea what sort of pressure he would prefer. Should she grip him tight? Would he prefer slow, gentle strokes? Where should she even start?
She simply couldn't picture what it'd be like to please him the way he pleased her. However, she did have some sort of idea about how he'd react. She'd given him shoulder rubs before on her visits, and she always liked all the ways he'd react to them. The relaxed smile on his face, the way his head tilted back, those soft groaning sounds, the words he'd whisper... it'd be a more intense version of that, wouldn't it? He'd even say the same words, so she could picture them perfectly...

“Oh, Zoey, yes...”
Maybe his hips would buck against her hand the way her own hips did.
“Don't stop... that feels really good...” His voice would be low, just enough for her to make out his words, and interspersed with heavy, excited breathing.
She'd tightly grip his shoulder in one hand as she usually did for him, and maybe with her other hand, she should make the same motions against his... against the bulge in his underwear. Yes, that was a way to think of it.
No sense thinking of a more direct thing to call it if any other word embarrassed her enough to stop her thought track.
His lower lip would tremble as he bit down on it and continued rocking into her hand. A high-pitched whimper would emerge from his throat; he normally apologized for the stranger noises he'd make during massages, but Zoey never thought he needed to. Therefore, he wouldn't bother in her fantasy. If anything, he'd make as many moans, whines, and gasps as his body demanded so that Zoey could hear the effect she had on him.
“I love you, Zoey...” She loved imagining him saying her name. It ran through her mind a few more times, just to make that sound stick.
“Zoey, Zoey, Zoey...”
She pressed her finger into her slit and held her breath again. Mike would circle his finger around her opening and gaze into her eyes, reading her expression to gauge her reaction.
“Please,” she'd whisper. She was the last one to take a step further, and now was his turn. Rubbing around the outside felt fantastic – anything his hands could possibly do felt fantastic – but now she wondered how it would feel to have him, even just his finger, inside her. Her index finger pressed against her opening and sank in to the first knuckle.
“OW!”
Zoey yelped and immediately pulled her finger out. Her heart pounded as her eyes drifted toward her door; did someone hear her cry like that? After she could be sure that she wasn't caught, she sat up and looked down between her legs. Wasn't that supposed to feel good? Did she do something wrong?
After taking a few even breaths in an attempt to ease her nerves, she rubbed her finger around her opening again. This part still felt nice, especially when she pictured Mike's hand in her own hand's place and his lips lightly pecking at the side of her neck. He'd slowly open her up and slip his finger inside her...
Zoey hissed through her teeth once she pushed into the first knuckle again. She couldn't bear to go any deeper than this; already she felt an uncomfortable pain. She tried holding it for a few seconds, waiting for the pain to fade and that mythical, world-bending pleasure to set in, but before long, had to pull her finger back out. That wasn't anything like she'd heard it should be; instead, it felt strange, as if she had placed her finger in a place where nothing belonged.
Was something missing?
She once more became aware of the pounding in her heart. Of course... nerves. One thing she'd heard was that without total relaxation, being penetrated would just feel uncomfortable at best, and painful at worst. This was the first time she'd gone this far; with all of these foreign thoughts and new sensations filling her mind, there was no way she could relax. This was too strange. Too guilt-inducing. Too exciting. Too many contradictory things at once. Relaxation was furthest from her mind.
But maybe Mike would be able to change that?
She already knew he'd had girlfriends before her. While she never asked much about his previous relationships – in a way, she really didn't want to know – he'd admitted that nothing they'd done together had been a first for him, although he did swear in the same breath that she was the best he ever had at anything. What other things had he done already? Had he fingered a girl before?
She didn't want to know the answer to that. But if he had done this before, then that would mean he'd know how to set a girl at ease. How to make her comfortable. How to help her enjoy something like this.
She wanted so much to enjoy this with him.
He'd softly kiss her lips and run his hand through her hair, tugging it just enough for her to feel it. If anything could relax her in this moment, him doing that for her would be a great start. Her hands would drift up and down his back, brushing against his tan skin and savoring the feel of his lean muscles moving under her fingertips. His finger would make those circling motions again, but much slower, to give her time to adjust to his hand's presence.
She kept up with the circular motions and didn't push in, but in her mind, Mike did. His hand was so much bigger than hers; if her own finger made her uncomfortable, then surely his would be twice as painful. But this was a dream sequence, nothing more. It could be anything she wanted. And what she wanted was the unbelievable bliss that she always thought should come of this.
Zoey moved her other hand down to her clit and circled a finger around it with the same rhythm as the finger between her lips. Her breaths picked up as in her mind, Mike slowly worked his finger in and out of her body.
“Does this feel good?” he'd ask. His smile would have dropped back down from ecstatic to nervous – he had to be damn sure he was doing this right and she knew it – and he'd be breathing just as heavily as when she stroked him, although her hands were nowhere near there now.
“Yes, Mike...” she whispered aloud as she pressed both fingers closer to her body. “I love you...”
“I love you too.”
Zoey couldn't wait for him to get here tomorrow. Even if they didn't go anywhere near this far, she still needed to hear those three words from him. He still seemed uneasy about them sometimes, but this could be the weekend where she convinced him fully that he could say them as much as he wanted.
“I love you so much...” she whispered to the air as she kept touching herself. His finger sank deeper inside her, and although her own actions didn't demand it, she arched her back as she mentally pressed against him. Her mental self moaned his name as his finger curled against the hot button that supposedly existed deep inside her body; just to add even more fuel, he'd press his thumb against her clit and rub back and forth as his finger slipped in and out of her, occasionally curling and making her back arch again.
“Mike, yes...” she gasped. “Faster...” It wasn't all that difficult to keep herself quiet in that moment, but in her head, she liked the image of Mike doing so well that she couldn't hold in her pleas. He'd respond immediately and increase the pace at which his hand worked her body, which would only make it harder for her to breathe.
“Mike...”
What a perfect name...
“Oh, Mike...”
It felt so good to moan that name, to pretend she couldn't help it...
“Mike, please, Mike...!”
Her own hands picked up speed, but the barrier between reality and fantasy had begun to blur. She'd stopped focusing on her own hands; after all, all they really had to do was hold on to the strong man she had kneeling over her. He wrapped his free arm around her and pulled her into a tight hug as he continued fingering her. Zoey didn't necessarily need a man to protect her, but that didn't mean she didn't value how safe, warm, and loved she felt in his tight embrace. Even the memory caused a soothing warmth to spread over her skin, especially where his body would have pressed against her own.
“I love you, Zoey...” He couldn't whisper that enough. “I need you...”
“I need you too, Mike...” What did either of them mean by that? Did they need each other physically? Sexually? Emotionally? In that moment? For the rest of the night? For the rest of their lives?
Yes. She'd take all of those. She needed every single thing she could get from Mike. This was the first time she'd ever felt so truly in love, and she never wanted any of these feelings – not the deep emotional connection, and not this sudden, primal, physical need – to ever go away.
She needed Mike in every single sense, and she needed Mike to need her, too.
The comforting warmth quickly built into an unfamiliar heat as her hands unconsciously picked up their speed. Her heart pulsed in her chest as if she'd just run a marathon, with sharp, shallow breaths to match. She'd never felt this wonderful before, not even during any of the other times she'd taken care of herself; deep down, she knew she'd never have reached this point if she didn't have Mike in her head. She always had the physical part down, but didn't realize she was missing the emotional component until her head and clit both began buzzing with a strange, incredible feeling.
“I'm close...” she whispered to the empty room, though in her head, it came out as more of a desperate plea than a simple affirmation. Mike pulled her head in for a firm kiss and thrust his finger as deep as it would go, with his thumb pressing and rubbing frantically against her clit. They both gasped when their lips parted; Zoey added an extra moan at the thought of his hot breath against her mouth.
“Cum,” he'd whisper as his finger curled again.
“Miiike...” Her body began trembling. Was this what it was like to be so close? She'd never felt anything like this, so she could only assume it'd hit soon...
“Cum,” he'd repeat before briefly kissing her lips once more. “Please, Zoey. Please cum for me.”
“Mike, yes!” Even if someone were in the room with her, they wouldn't have been able to make out her words as they came between heavy gasps.
“Please cum!”
That last demand, voiced in her head as if Mike would get the same amount of pleasure just from knowing she had climaxed, took center stage in her mind as a rush of tension poured out of her body. She gritted her teeth to hold in a scream, or a moan, or whatever noise it was that wanted to tear out from deep inside her, but her fantasy self let out everything and allowed him to hear every note. She pressed her hands as hard against her body as she could, eager to prolong that beautiful release, but just as quickly as it overtook her, it ended, leaving her feeling the same as she did before she started this whole thing.
Well, almost the same. This satisfied exhaustion wasn't there earlier. Her head wasn't buzzing with new emotions she needed to work out before she started, either.
She groped through the darkness to find her panties and put them back on. She considered redressing entirely, but her fantasy hadn't come to a close yet; it'd be a much better finish if she stayed almost naked.
Zoey wrapped her blanket around herself, making sure to leave enough free to hold in her arms. In her mind, Mike remained beside her, as satisfied as she was from the night's events. She'd press herself against his chest and let him cuddle her to sleep. No movement was necessary, not even his usual stroking of her skin; all he had to do was hold her tight and let her listen to his heart, and she'd be asleep in minutes.
She wondered what Mike was doing right then; maybe, just maybe, he had a similar method of helping himself sleep when he felt too lonely.
Maybe she could ask him tomorrow.
She smiled in the dark and gripped the blanket tighter. She didn't have to make a big deal of it. She didn't have to detail every little thought that went through her head and every movement that came from her fingers that night. But as they made out the next day – and they would make out the next day, Mike could never last more than a few hours into a visit before getting her somewhere private and letting out a month's worth of kisses in the space of a few minutes – she could try to lead things into the one question she wanted to be brave enough to ask.
“Are you attracted to me?”
And if he was...
She squeezed her legs together. They'd figure out how to handle that together.
Zoey could never stand the wait the night before Mike's visits, but this one would be a bit more difficult.
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Thirty Passionate Reasons