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Being Human	By : RotSeele Category: +G through L > Invader Zim > AU/AR-Alternate Universe-Alternate Reality Views: 2485 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Invader Zim. I do not make any money from this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Being Human
- 2-Two
- 3-Three
- 4-Four
- 5-Five
- 6-Six
- 7-Seven
- 8-Eight
- 9-Nine
- 10-Ten
- 11-Eleven
- 12-Twelve
- 13-Thirteen
- 14-Fourteen
- 15-Fifteen
- 16-Sixteen
- 17-Seventeen
- 18-Eighteen
- 19-Nineteen
- 20-Twenty
- 21-Twenty One
- 22-Twenty-Two
- 23-Twenty-Three
- 24-Twenty-Four
- 25-Twenty-Five
- 26-Twenty-Six
- 27-Twenty-Seven
- 28-Twenty-Eight
- 29-Twenty-Nine (Epilogue)
- 18
- 19
- 20
Nineteen - Zim POV
I asked the question out of curiosity. It was some earthling game the meat sacks played, obviously, but I never spent much time learning the nuances of human past-times. I never much bothered with anything that wasn’t directly related to invading or somehow getting the upper hand over Dib. So, socializing wasn’t my strong point. After all, a conqueror really didn’t need to socialize with his slaves - he simply needed to rule them with an iron fist and kill some off now and then to solidify his reign.
Judging by the way Gaz was looking at me, I decided I probably shouldn’t have opened my mouth.
“You don’t know how to play?” Seerah gaped.
I stared at her, suddenly extremely terrified. I pressed my lips together and slowly shook my head. I wanted to look at Gaz, to hope that maybe she would figure out a way to get me out of this. But she wasn’t speaking up. I heard a groan from beside me. I looked at Dib.
“Gaz,” Dib said in an aggrieved tone. “You can’t be serious.”
Gaz looked at him and I saw Dib shiver. I knew why. Gaz’s lips were drawn back, showing her teeth. It wasn’t exactly a smile that entreated good things. “What’s wrong, brother dear? Scared?”
Dib’s eyes narrowed. “No. Let’s play the damn game.”
“Well, is someone going to explain this to me?” I asked.
“Easier to show you.” Dib said in a soft growl. He took hold of my arm and pulled me along with him. I glanced at Gaz, but she had that look in her eyes that promised maximum pain toward whoever talked to her next. I felt my skin crawl. Whatever this game is, I’m completely convinced it’s a significant source of pain.
Dib sat me me down across from him. Beside him sat Gaz, then Seerah, and Lyse sat next to me, so we formed an odd circle on the floor. Seerah set the glass bottle on the floor in the middle of our circle.
I clenched my hands on my knees. “I don’t think I want to do this.” I said.
“Too late, Zeke.” Seerah gave me a brilliant smile, but it was Gaz’s expression that kept me from jumping up and run screaming for my life. I don’t know how she managed to look completely innocent and yet have ‘I will kill you’ in her eyes. If I ran, she’d expose me. If I stayed, she wouldn’t consider me a prey item. My lips drew in a thin line. I didn’t like being a prey item.
“All right.” Seerah said. “The idea behind this is that someone spins the bottle so it rotates in a circle. Like so.” She flicked her wrist, sending the bottle in a centrifugal spin. As it slowed, I began to realize the gist of this game. I began to understand why Dib didn’t want to play this game. The bottle was obviously some sort of selection device that would determine which two individuals would perform an embarrassing action. As the bottle slowed, I found it was far more interesting to watch Dib's face than the bottle. That was how I saw the blood drain from Dib's face as the bottle finally stopped its spin. I looked down. The bottle was pointing to Gaz and Dib. Seerah's face brightened. "Now that the bottle has chosen, we complete the rule. Since you two are related, you have to tell a story about one another."
"Can I pass?" Dib asked.
"No." Seerah said cheerily.
"Aw, are you scared of what I might say, big brother?" Gaz asked in a snide tone.
"No. I don't want you murdering me in my sleep."
"Well, I won't do that. At least, not tonight."
"Gee, thanks, Gaz." Dib said, rubbing his temple. He looked to Seerah then and asked, "What kind of story do you want?"
"Well, what about the story of your first crush?" Seerah smiled too innocently to be innocent.
Gaz tapped her fingers against her lips. "I don't know of Dib's love life and I'd prefer not to, but, there was this kid he obsessed over. They were bitter rivals in elementary school, but they still did everything together. They terrorized the neighborhood and each other. It was kind of funny to watch them try to one up the other, at least until they dragged me into it. But I could tell that Dib started to get weird around him about the time puberty hit."
I felt a strange feeling in my chest. The way that Gaz was looking at me out of the corner of her eye scared me. Was she talking about me? Was she saying that Dib... liked me? No, that's impossible. Dib couldn't... he couldn't want to...
"I'm pretty sure the kid was oblivious," Gaz continued, "but Dib just kept at it, at least for a while. But I know for a fact you're a virgin Dib. You don't have the slightest fucking clue on how to tell anyone how you feel without looking like a total douchebag."
"The hell, Gaz?" Dib snapped, red in the face. He had his hands clenched into fists on his knees, and he looked like he was going to hit her if she kept talking. "Couldn't you have picked a better story than that one?"
"What story, Dib? You mean the one with that imaginary girlfriend you said you had? Please. I knew you were lying the moment you told dad that you and Felicia were going to her summer home to have wild monkey sex."
I stared at Dib with wide eyes. My expression wasn't all feigned. I really was surprised. That summer I remembered clearly - Dib and I had gone out of of the city to the country, to a small lake area. It was Dib's attempt to see if water still caused me to have rashes. I went along because the lake reportedly had a high concentration of raw materials that I believed I could utilize in some fashion. In the end, Dib had failed at his scheme and I lost out on my materials. But... that had been what Dib had told his dad? If it hadn't come from Gaz's mouth, I don't think I could've believed it.
Dib glowered at Gaz. "I know you're a virgin. You haven't had a boyfriend since the ninth grade, after Theo Varnez dumped you for Victoria Putnam because she sucked his cock in the school bathroom, after you told him you weren't going to do a threesome with him."
"Just because I haven't had a boyfriend doesn't mean I haven't had sex." Gaz protested.
"Gaz, when you found out he dumped you and what he did, you took a baseball bat to his house, smashed in all his windows, then proceeded to threaten to cut off his balls when you found his room. Even if you weren't caught officially, the story spread enough that no guy wanted to risk his manhood with you." Dib said in a deadpan tone.
Gaz just stared at him. I could sense the violence brimming within her and knew from experience if I so much as twitched, she'd explode. Seerah must've sensed this too, because she moved, placing her hand on the bottle. "Oookay, enough of that subject," she said. "Let's spin again."
I watched the bottle spin again, around and around. I wasn't really focusing on it, instead thinking about what Gaz had said. It reminded me of the earlier conversation I'd had with her, about Dib liking Zeke in that sexual manner and me breaking his heart when he found out Zeke didn't really exist and was an alias for Zim. But Gaz's story made my squeedlyspooch twist with anxiety. Dib liked me. Liked me.
The bottle stopped spinning.
Dib's face grew pale. My eyes grew wide.
The bottle pointed to me and him.
- 18
- 19
- 20
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Being Human