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Borealis: A Zutara Story	By : jaded_priceless Category: Avatar - The Last Airbender > AU/AR - Alternate Universe/Alternate Reality Views: 34026 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 4
Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender, Avatar: The Legend of Korra, any historical figures or events, or easily recognizable persons, places or things. I make no profit from this work of fanfiction

Chapter List
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Chapter 18

The doctor said to use the oil if he was injured so Zuko deduced it should work for Katara’s injuries. He laid her in his bed on her side then went to run the water for a bath. She screamed when he lifted dress and Zuko noticed it was sticking to her back.
“What is this?” he said getting a pair of scissors and cutting off the garment. He ran his fingers back and forth over the inside of the fabric then pulled it away when he pricked himself – steel wool. He put the dress down and looked at her skin immediately understanding why she was still crying and begging for him to make it stop. Someone had steel wool inside her dress. It lay flat so long as the wearer was relatively still but chafed and scraped away the skin with every movement of the fabric.
Katara had been laying on this while he took her and it had been scrubbing away her flesh. He’d put pressure on her body when he crawled on top of her and moved her with every thrust. Most of her back was raw and bleeding, she was also covered in sweat. He’d caused her to scrape off her skin and now her own body was adding salt to her wounds.
He’d been an active child so he knew exactly how it felt. He had often suffered the same punishment when he was younger. His mother had sewn it inside his clothes to teach him not to fidget. Zuko carefully lifted her once more and carried her to the bathroom apologizing every step of the way, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,”
He washed the pitcher the servant had used earlier and laid her sideways on the bathroom floor and began rinsing her back of any loose particles. He left her lying there and returned with a magnet to remove any shards that had been imbedded in her flesh. Lu Ten had taught him that trick.
He was stupid. This was his entire fault. Lady Munashii, the head concubine was Azulon’s favorite mistress at the time of his death. It was standard custom that concubines leftover from the previous ruler be removed from the palace so the incoming Fire Lord could build his own harem. His father didn’t take advantage of the concubine system so Munashii retained the title and position since there wasn’t an active royal companion to take her place.
Now that he was involved with Katara she would assume that role and the perks that come with it. Munashii and the rest of Azulon’s would be stripped of their titles and retired to a country estate of Zuko’s choosing to make room for any woman he appointed to the position. He never should have gone to her to request clothing for Katara. She was in unnecessary anguish and it was entirely his fault.
Zuko continued to berate himself even after he felt it was safe to allow her to heal herself. He wasn’t sure how it worked and he didn’t want to risk her skin closing around a tiny bit of metal causing infection. He wanted to make sure he’d gotten it all before helping her to the bath, “Do you feel better?”
She didn’t respond.
“I’m sorry Katara. I didn’t realize she’d put that in your dress. Does it feel like that anywhere else?” Zuko asked picking her up and carrying her to the other side of the bathroom so she wouldn’t step in the metal splinters he’d just removed.
Katara nodded and lowered her head sobbing.
“Where? I can make it better,” Zuko claimed but Katara shook her head and tried to push him away. “Katara, please let me try. I helped your back didn’t I?”
She sniffed and looked up at him with bloodshot blue eyes, “You can’t make it better. You’re the one that made it hurt.”
Zuko showed her how to operate the knobs on the tub and left her to bathe. She’d closed her legs when she said he was the one who made it hurt. He closed the door behind him he threw a fireball against the wall he’d left bare for that purpose and unleashed a screaming fireball from his mouth. This was not how things were supposed to happen. He was supposed to tell off his father, free his uncle, then leave and beg the Avatar to let him join them.
His uncle was not supposed to already be gone. He wasn’t supposed to lose his nerve at the last minute. His father wasn’t supposed to come out of the bunker before he regained his courage. The Avatar and the Water Tribe kids weren’t supposed to be captured and they weren’t supposed to be taking a tour of the Earth Kingdom to flush out the little Earthbender and the rest of the rebels.
He wasn’t supposed to be put in a position to protect the girl by making her his royal concubine. He wasn’t supposed to become a rapist. He wasn’t supposed to commit the act his mother abhorred above all others. He wasn’t supposed to become the type of creature that she despised while doing something she would approve of. His mother would have been angry and disappointed in him for using such a despicable method to protect Katara but she would have hated him if he didn’t do what he could to keep an innocent girl from being tossed to the lecherous buzzard-wasps that comprised his father’s court.
Every last noble from the surrounding islands had converged on the capital and military leaders from every division were at the palace planning a counter strike since the measures they took during the eclipse still failed due to the Water Tribe reinforcements. Katara was Water Tribe. She was a Waterbending Water Tribe woman. She was the Avatar’s teacher and she was at the failed invasion of the North Pole. She’d even managed to hinder Azula.
They’d pass her around like a bowl of fire flakes during the summer solstice festival. She’d be forced to submit to their every depravity. At least he would only use her in the normal manner.
Zuko crawled under his bed, removed the loose brick from the floor, and pulled out the last drawing that was made of his mother, “Mom, I don’t know what to do. I know I promised you I’d never dishonor a woman, but I had to dishonor her to keep the crew and the nobles from doing so. I can’t help her without hurting her, but she’ll be hurt worse if I’m not the one doing it. It is the only way I can defend her and keep her from being completely ruined.
“I don’t want to hurt her. I’ve never wanted to hurt her; even when we were fighting I’ve never wanted to cause her pain. I only wanted to get her out of the way so I could get the Avatar and come back home. I’m scared Uncle Iroh was right and I might like her. She’s the only girl I’ve been around for the past year. She’s pretty and she was nice to me when I didn’t deserve it. She offered to help Uncle and remove the scar Father gave me,” Zuko tearfully explained.
“I don’t want to violate her, but I know what the others would force her to do would be much worse. Am I deluding myself to justify my actions because I dreamed of touching her while I was on the ship? I thought it was because Katara was the only girl I consistently saw after being around men for three years but I dreamed of her touching me again after we got out of that cave. I still dreamed of her even after I was with Mai. I’ve made them both cry but her tears make me feel worse than Mai’s. I don’t want to hurt either one of them.
“I’m so confused. I wish you were here to tell me what to do. I miss you. I need you. Can you send me a sign from the spirit world telling me what I should do or ask great-grandfather to tell the new Avatar what I should do?” Zuko added completely unaware Katara was listening.
- 18
- 19
- 20
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Borealis: A Zutara Story