Adult-FanFiction.org : Cartoons

Enter the Naked Mole Rat	By : kwh Category: Kim Possible > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 18153 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Kim Possible, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 18
- 19
- 20
Ron had three full days at Yamanouchi before his flight left for Hong Kong, and there was much to be done. He needed to learn the Saru Chonouryoku cover story inside out, because whilst there wasn't very much cover story to learn, what there was had to be so instinctively ingrained as to be second nature to him; after all, as Sensei pointed out to him, the only person who could catch Ron out as Saru Chonoryouko was Ron himself. He was also told he needed to take the pre-feudal edge off his old high Japanese vocabulary and learn enough modern words and constructs that he could credibly explain away his oddly archaic and anachronistic phrasing in his supposedly native language as a mere peculiarity. The best plan, according to Sensei, was for him to speak English as much as possible, but the more fluent and less obviously ancient the Japanese he did use, the better. And he would need to wear the Cuff of Sosumiha for the whole three days, as well; he'd be wearing it for a lot longer than that at the tournament so he'd need to get used to living in Toshimiru's skin full time.
He spent twelve hours on that first day, in character as Saru Chonouryoku, alternately answering quick-fire questions about his life story, and being corrected whenever he made a mistake either linguistically or when answering questions about his 'legend', as he had once seen a cover story described in a cheezy cold-war spy flick. Mostly being corrected, truth be told. It quickly became clear that the single sheet of paper was a wholly inadequate life story for anybody who had 28 years to account for, even if for the purposes of the 'legend' he had spent all those 28 years inside the walls of Yamanouchi following the ascetic life and monotonous daily routine of a fanatical student of Tai Sheng Pek Kwar. The story was embellished to explain each of the handful of scars that defaced Toshimiru's extraordinary physique, and then to cover the names, physical characteristics and specialisms of the most important teachers he would have learned from during that 28 years of monomaniacal study. Finally, critical and memorable events from the last quarter century of the almost two millennia of history of Yamanouchi were added to the mix ("Saru, when did the new dining hall open and which former Sensei was it named for?"). By the end of the day, Ron didn't know who he was, let alone whether any of this new information would stick. He collapsed full length onto his tatami mat and was asleep before he landed again after the first bounce.
Day two of his total immersion in the imaginary world of Saru Chonouryoku began typically far too early at Yamanouchi, but continued in much the same vein. However, by lunchtime, something amazing had started to happen. Ron had started to get it. He really could reel off facts on demand, talk fondly about the big mole on the nose of the nunchaka instructor he had supposedly learnt advanced rice flail techniques from ten years earlier, and describe the decor in the great hall before the last redecoration. The number of mistakes he was making was dwindling rapidly. They hadn't been eliminated yet, but Ron was confident now for the first time that another day and a half of reinforcement and fine tuning would see him transformed into an entirely believable and confident Saru Chonouryoku. By the evening, despite being absolutely exhausted, he was almost impossible to catch out. That night, when he keeled over face-first onto his tatami mat, he was no less exhausted, but a smile of accomplishment played around the corners of his mouth.
Day three dawned all too quickly, but not quickly enough for Ron and the student body at Yamanouchi, who had already been up and at it for half an hour before the sun joined them. The testing was enlivened this morning by a dozen senior students attacking Ron simultaneously with various weapons to try and distract him, while several instructors threw quick fire and deliberately trick questions at him. By ten in the morning, neither the weapons of the ninja nor the probing questions of the instructors had breached Ron's defences even the once, and Sensei called a halt to the testing.
"Master Stoppable, you are ready!", he announced.
Ron bowed to Sensei imperiously. Then he turned and bowed equally imperiously to the students who had spent four hours unsuccessfully trying to clobber him. And then he said "Booyah!!!!!" to nobody in particular.
The remainder of the day was far less frenetic. Ron studied photographs of the missing Yamanouchi alumni until he was sure he would recognise them at a glance across a crowded room, and then he studied the original plans of 'Klaustaffen Island Coaling Station', which Yamanouchi had somehow managed to obtain. Ron was well aware that in the subsequent 80 odd years a lot would likely have changed, but he was also told that while the tunnel and cave network would almost certainly have grown since 1923, it was unlikely to have shrunk. And then he was free to wander the school grounds and enjoy the summer sunshine and the breeze around the summit of Mount Yamanouchi. Somewhere around the school, his supposedly inseparable companion Rufus was continuing to enjoy the fawning attentions of the younger students; he was such a tart for a bit of cupboard love, Ron thought, ruefully. A bit of petting and some premium snackage and he was anybody's. Though, Ron realised slightly guiltily, he hadn't really thought much about the little fellow for the past three days. They had greeted each other cheerily a couple of times as they passed each other during that time, Ron en-route to or from a gruelling session of quick-fire cramming on his new alter-ego, Rufus in the company of one or another group of giggling children intent on skritching him between the ears and feeding him little cubes of Sushi until he popped. He'd enjoy catching up with the little fellow later, but for now the brief separation didn't seem to be doing either of them any harm.
In due course, Ron found himself sitting cross-legged in silent contemplation atop the ancient weatherworn ramparts of the Yamanouchi school, serenely watching occasional small fluffy clouds moving slowly across the otherwise clear blue sky, and casting small scudding shadows across the epic scenery of the range of smaller but still imposing tree covered peaks that surrounded Mount Yamanouchi.
'The calm before the storm', he thought to himself.
He wondered what Kim was doing right now. He realised that he missed her very much indeed. Was she sitting at home, pining for him, he wondered? Draken & Shego would surely be out of circulation for a while, after the whole giant killer robot thing, and he fondly hoped that the rest of the 'usual suspects' would be keeping their heads down for a time in the aftermath as well. But maybe she was even now battling Professor Dementor in some dimly lit lair?
Without him by her side...
She'd probably be doing rather better on her own, if she was currently fighting evil, he reflected sadly. The absence of a clumsy, gawky, blonde youth with intermittently vanishing pants could hardly be regarded as a major crimp to her crime fighting style, he reflected with momentary melancholy.
Then, he smiled to himself as he realised that he would be back in Middleton in almost no time at all, with an amazing tale of intrigue and heroic derring do to share with a rapt and adoring girlfriend.
Also, he thought with a smile, this incredible expanding Ninja outfit they had given him was all one piece. So there was absolutely no way at all that he could lose his pants on Lo Pin's island. Well... Probably. And even if he did, he could definitely edit that bit out of the dramatised version he would recount to Kim, anyway...
He lapsed again into vacant meditation.
It was perhaps half an hour later that he first became aware of hushed whispers and muffled giggling emanating from somewhere nearby. It was half an hour after that before he looked around and was shocked to find a large percentage of the teenage female demographic amongst the student body crowded together a little further along the high wall. But where he was sitting facing the rugged beauty of the Hakami mountain range, they were all sitting together and facing him!
He blushed slightly, and said "Hi Ladies!", self-consciously. It didn't sound quite the same when Toshimiru's vocal chords enunciated it, Ron realised. When it left his brain it sounded embarrassed, self-effacing and goofy. When it came out of his mouth it sounded much more like "The LURVE DOCTOR is in DA HOUSE" than an embarrassed greeting by a cripplingly shy teenage boy. Which probably explained why about 30 hands went up in unison to wave to him, and there were a number of dreamy sighs, a couple of gasps and several low moans, accompanied by some embarrassed shifting about amongst some of the impromptu audience.
Ron tried to return to his serene mountain-gazing, but the whole 'crowd of adoring teenage girls who look worryingly like they might suddenly decide to pounce en masse and eat me at any moment' thing was a little distracting, to say the least.
He decided to go and find Rufus instead.
Springing athletically to his feet, he turned to the ever growing throng and said "Bye ladies!". Again the powerful PA system installed in his throat turned it into something embarrassingly suggestive. Now 40 hands waved back at him, and there was a collective moaning sigh of almost visceral disappointment.
Ron skedaddled as quickly as he could, without risking a look back...
- 18
- 19
- 20
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Enter the Naked Mole Rat