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Losing Control	By : GabrielC Category: Transformers > G1 > AU/AR Views: 4231 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Transformer. I make no profit from writing this

Chapter List
- 15
- 16
- 17
WARNINGS: mechxmechxmech. Tiny hint of sticky smut

bond speak

Chapter 16 - Ties

Autobot Base.

Prowl barely managed to make it to Prime’s office supporting himself against the bulkhead, he palmed the door chime. A low rumbling ‘come in’ sounded from the room before the doors hissed open. Prime was up the instant he caught sight of Prowl and caught the black and white mech as he stumbled.

“Primus Prowl, you shouldn’t be out of the medbay.” Optimus’s brow furrowed into a deep frown as he guided his bond mate to the nearby berth. “Have you even refueled?”

Prowl shook his head weakly, allowing himself to be seated and held upright tenderly in Optimus’s arms. “I’m sorry, I needed to make sure… you were alright.”

Optimus drew back in surprise. “Alright? Surely you can feel that I’m alright Prowl.” He retracted his face mask and smiled warmly at the smaller mech, feeling his way through their bond hesitantly. He felt worry, fatigue and confusion bleeding into his systems and then felt Prowl’s consciousness push him away.

“Prowl what’s wrong?”

His Second took a moment before peering up at him from beneath his striking chevron. “Jazz…” He uttered softly. “Why am I bonded to Jazz?”

Optimus’s optics widened. “Did Ratchet not tell you?”

“He wasn’t in the medbay; he doesn’t know I’ve left.”

Optimus sighed and cast him a small smile. “I’ll comm. him and Jazz they’ll be better at explaining what happened.” He rubbed soothing small circles across Prowl’s lower back struts in an effort to get the black and white mech to relax. His posture had stiffened considerably at the mention of Jazz. Not entirely sure of his apprehension, Optimus broached the bond once more.

Prowl does being bonded to Jazz bother you?

Prowl shrank beneath Optimus’s earnest gaze, not wanting to face that breach between himself and his former lover just yet. There was just too much anger, bitterness, more on his part than on Jazz’s. Everything was a joke to Jazz, he took very little seriously, how in the name of Primus was he going to cope being bonded to him?

We fought. Just before I collapsed, I said some things…

Prowl turned his head away with regret, it wasn’t fair that Prime now found himself in the middle of their rift.

Prowl we’re bonded now, I can feel you both. It’s not as bad as you think.

Prowl frowned up at his leader, he hadn’t expected such a naïve statement but then despite being bonded, how much did they really know each other? Sighing Prowl relinquished part control of his side of the bond and allowed his feelings to seep through.

Not expecting the sudden rush of feeling - of remorse, guilt and anger followed by hurt. A pain so ingrained, so old Optimus was baffled as to how he’d not felt an emotion so powerful the moment he’d bonded to Prowl - Optimus drew back and hissed in startled surprise. His optics narrowed at Prowl, who continued to stare at the floor as if ashamed of his own feelings towards a fellow Autobot.

“I had no idea you felt that way.” Optimus spoke quietly.

Prowl’s shoulders slumped, his door wings drooping on his back. “It’s not something I am proud of; I should have let it go a long time ago.”

“Prowl feelings like that never truly leave us, trust me.” Optimus resumed his ministrations along Prowl’s back struts in an effort to comfort him. He harbored his own pain, his own regrets. These he had freely shared with Prowl during their initial bonding, which raised a worrisome issue.

“Prowl, how are you hiding these feelings from me, from Jazz?”

Ducking his head in renewed guilt, Prowl hesitated to answer. He didn’t want Optimus to think he had anything to hide; he wanted nothing more than to finally be honest with someone, someone who genuinely cared for him as he was. Something Jazz had always struggled with. Jazz had always needed more from him, more excitement, more affection, just more of himself that Prowl in the end couldn’t give him. He had never been enough for Jazz, what if Optimus ended up feeling the same?

“Prowl?” Optimus prompted him from his reverie and smiled at him when he glanced up.

“I tightened the bond on my side. My battle computer allows me to repress my emotions to the extent that you won’t feel anything but the most extreme feelings that I am experiencing at the time. If need be I can repress them completely but I still feel both of you. I can’t prevent that.”

“Don’t you trust me?”

The softly asked question shocked Prowl; he stared intently at his leader the bond momentarily flaring open between them. “Of course… it’s just I…”

Prowl never got to finish when the door chimed. “What in the slag are you doing out of the med bay?!” Ratchet barreled through the door, a flurry of arms and ire. “Have you gone completely out of your glitching processor?!”

“Ratchet please.” Optimus spoke firmly, his frown all the rebuke his medic needed to calm his temper.

Shaking his head, Ratchet approached Prowl. He scanned him and growled softly. “You are in desperate need of refueling Prowl. What were you thinking?”

“I needed to know what had happened. I felt Jazz through the bond but not Optimus initially. I needed to make sure he was alright.”

Ratchet’s brow shot up, surprised at the uncharacteristic show of affectionate concern from the normally cold mech. “Slag, I’m sorry I wasn’t there but you should have comm’d me.” Ratchet produced a cube of energon and thrust it into Prowl’s slightly trembling hands.

“Take that, slowly. It’s richer than what you’re used to, you need it although you may feel like you want to purge once you’ve taken it.”

Prowl simply nodded and proceeded to sip the energon. His optics were distant, staring, his processor mulling over and over the thought of being bonded to Jazz. He heard Prime and Ratchet talking but couldn’t focus on their words. He was bonded to Jazz and Prime, he had two bond mates. He’d gone from being one of the most private and solitary mechs on the base to part of a trine link. He could feel their presence within him, part of him. One chaotic, distraught and the other calm and steady. His processor ached as he went over and over the situation in his mind. How could they have let this happen?

His intakes hitched as his thoughts focused once more on Jazz, the torrent of negative emotion bleeding from the normally exuberant mech was too much. It merged with his own, intensified it. ‘I can’t do this.’ Prowl thought to himself, his panic rising exponentially. He had no control over this; he was part of something he didn’t feel like he belonged to. It wasn’t right; it was never supposed to be this way.

Optimus turned sharply towards his bond mate, feeling a sudden swell of anxiety and panic. The energon cube slipped from Prowl’s fingers and a desperate sob escaped the black and white’s vocaliser. Optimus had never seen, never mind felt, Prowl looking so visibly distraught. He stood to one side while Ratchet tended to the fritzing mech.

“What’s happening?” Optimus was worried, the bond felt erratic, painful. He let out a gasp of pain and clutched at his chest. “Ratchet…”

The medic swore loudly and pressed a needle into Prowl’s main energon line. The mech clawed at him in desperation, his optics wide, frantic. “I’m sorry Prowl it’s for your own good.” Ratchet replied to his unspoken question, the black and white staring at him with what could only be described as betrayal. Prowl fell limp in his arms and Ratchet lowered him gently to the berth before tending to his leader.

“What do you feel?”

“My chest, my spark hurts. It felt like he was pulling away.”

“Hmmm, I was worried something like this was going to happen.”

“Like what was going to happen?”

The door hissed open sharply before he could respond and Jazz burst into the room. His visor flashed brightly when he caught sight of Prowl on the berth. “Doc, what happened? I felt an awful pain in my spark, is he?”

“He’s fine, he’ll be ok. Sit down Jazz, there’s something I need to explain to you both.” Ratchet waited for them both to settle before continuing.

“The forced nature of the bond and the fact that Prowl wasn’t aware of Jazz at the time, caused his systems to treat it as an attempted hack to his cortex. In his panic, he was forcibly trying to break his bond to you both.”

“What!? That will kill him!” Jazz exclaimed, his optics concentrating on the prone black and white frame.

“Yes, I know that.” Ratchet answered gently. “It’s up to you two to ensure he doesn’t allow his systems to reject the bond. Explain to him exactly what the situation is.”

“How did this happen Ratchet? Why didn’t I have the same side effects?” Optimus asked in confusion.

“You had both me and Jazz present in the room with you when you came round. Plus Prowl is an intensely private mech as you both know. To have his feelings so exposed is going to be hard for him. He wasn’t ready for this. Bonds as you know are supposed to be an intimate union between two mechs who are completely committed to each other and while he may have feelings for you both…”

“It’s because of me.” Jazz finished quietly.

“You were an unknown factor to him yes. I don’t think it means that he doesn’t want to be bonded to you. He just has to come to terms with it.” Ratchet sighed and shook his head. “He’ll be waking up in about half a cycle. You both need to be here.” He turned and headed for the door, halting in his tracks, he turned and jabbed a finger at Jazz.

“Whatever issues you two have with each other, you’re going to deal with them, or this will just keep happening. I’d rather not keep our second in command and tactician in forced stasis when we have increased Decepticon activity along our perimeters.” He glared at both mechs. “Deal with it. Fast.”

****

Prowl could hear voices nearby, fuzzy and barely coherent. His consciousness returning, felt like a heavy weight being lifted from his cortex and before he could stop himself, he let out a low groan of complaint. The voices ceased immediately and Prowl felt the presence close to him shift.

“Hey Prowler. Good t’ see you back with the living.”

Prowl’s optics flickered online, his helm turned towards where Jazz was lightly caressing the edge of his chevron. “Jazz?”

“Yeah it’s me. Optimus is here too, don’t worry.”

“Nngghhh…” Prowl groaned once more as he pushed himself up to sitting. Glancing around the room, he found Jazz sat beside him, cross legged on the large berth in Optimus’s office. He turned back to Jazz, for the moment far too dazed and groggy to feel uncomfortable with him. “What happened?”

Jazz flashed him a small, sad smile before dropping his head to fiddle with his hands. “It’s my fault.”

“What, how is this your fault?” Prowl tried to recall the previous cycle but whatever Ratchet had given to knock him out - he could remember that much - was slowing down the recall of his memory files.

“It’s not his fault.” A soft rumbling voice entered the room, gaining their immediate attention. “Jazz we talked about this.” Optimus walked over and sat on the edge of the berth and gave Jazz’s shoulder a gentle squeeze.

“Yeah I know, but I can’t help but feel responsible.”

“We’re in this together Jazz; we’ll work it out together.” Optimus insisted.

“Uumm… I am here.” Prowl frowned his optics flicking between them both. “Would someone like to inform me what happened please?”

Jazz chuckled at Prowl’s nonplussed expression. “You gave us a fright is what happened.”

“Your systems didn’t recognize the bond with Jazz as anything but a hack into your systems.”

Prowl cast a quick glance to the visored mech who sat with his helm still bowed.

“You went into a panic and tried to break from the bond completely.”

Prowl dropped his gaze. He’d panicked; cool, controlled, unfeeling Prowl had panicked. He frowned and shook his head. “That would have off lined me.”

“We know Prowler.” Jazz answered softly.

Prowl shuttered his optics and sighed. “I’m sorry.” He spoke so quietly the other two didn’t quite hear him.

Optimus lifted his chin with a finger. “We do understand we felt what you were feeling. We should have been there when you woke up. We can’t blame you for how you reacted. Ratchet said he’d half expected it anyway.”

Prowl gave him a tiny grateful smile and looked over to Jazz. “What now?”

Jazz peered up at him and shrugged. “We figure it out, I guess. I know you don’t want t’ be bonded t’ me Prowl but I truly…”

Prowl gently placed two fingers on Jazz’s lip components to silence him and dipped his head with tentative shyness. “I know.”

Jazz frowned giving a quick glance to Optimus. “So yer ok with it?”

Prowl drew back slightly, his face once again impassive, controlled. “I know how you feel and I know why you did what you did but…”

“I know… history right?”

Prowl nodded. “I’ll need time Jazz.” He held Jazz’s gaze with earnest intent.

Jazz gave a small nod and a sly grin pulled at the corners of his mouth. He shifted and brushed his fingertips over Prowl’s cheek, moving closer he tilted his helm and hesitantly brushed his lip components against Prowl’s before pulling away with an amused smirk at Prowl’s startled, wide optics. “Take all the time you need. I’m not going anywhere.”

Prowl felt a calmness wash over him, he couldn’t tell if it was from Optimus or Jazz or in this instance both. He allowed a relieved smile to cross his features at the feeling of the bond pulsing quietly within him. He reached out through the bond with some reluctance. Brushing against Optimus’s presence first and then Jazz’s, he felt them as strongly as he felt himself. Feelings of remorse and doubt crept into his processor. He had forced them into this, they were joined but at what cost?

He looked to Jazz, feeling the sorrow and pain at hurting Ironhide. He brushed his tapered fingers along Jazz’s still fidgeting hands, resting his palm on them in comfort. Jazz held his gaze, no words were needed he could feel Prowl’s concern, his genuine care for him and it filled him with a sense of hope. He knew Prowl had always loved him, just unwilling to show it, unwilling to let it cause him pain. Jazz could feel that deep well of emotion from Prowl now. There were no secrets between any of them anymore.

Optimus shifted on the berth and his large palm came to rest atop of Prowl’s. He could still feel the worry and doubt bleeding from Prowl and the vague hint of regret and apprehension from Jazz. The bitterness between the two was still very present, even if they were both willing to look past it for now. He found his own thoughts drifting, how could he help his bond mates repair a hurt that had had stellar cycles to deepen and scar? He let out an imperceptible sigh at a loss of what to do.

Without any warning, Jazz had moved and planted himself in front of Optimus. His fingers brushed over the face mask and amusement danced across his mouth. “Show me.”

Optimus frowned; catching Prowl’s equally surprised expression out of the corner of his optic. Jazz laughed at their confusion and reached them through the bond, making his intentions very clear.

You want t’ help us, remember I can feel that. He tapped lightly on Optimus's chest plates. I want this t’ work. He stole a quick furtive glance at Prowl.

There is one thing I know that can help, will bring us closer.

He brushed the face mask lightly, lifting his hands to tease ear finials along the side of Optimus’s helm. Bringing himself flush with his leader’s surprised frame, Jazz pressed his lips against the smooth metal. It's worth a try, what do we have to lose?

They both heard Prowl’s intakes hitch sharply as Jazz’s intent filled the bond, followed quickly by Optimus’s arousal caused by the soft caress of his sensitive finials. His powerful arms wrapped around Jazz’s waist and held him close. His face mask retracted allowing Jazz access.

The visored mech wasted no time, his nerves already threatening to get the better of him. He crushed his lip components against his leader come bond mate’s and relished the rush as Optimus pushed back into the kiss with tender acceptance.

Jazz broke the kiss with a faint gasp and pulled away from Optimus, turning to Prowl he grinned playfully. Prowl’s optics widened in nervous anticipation as he approached, he stiffened considerably, uncertainty clouding his need.

You need this, we need this Prowler. Relax… trust me…

Prowl's capacitor was pounding in his chassis, his spark fluttering with apprehension intermingled with eager want and faint arousal not his own. Jazz straddled his waist and laid a light kiss onto the center of his chevron, his fingers massaging the smooth red metal up to the tips. Prowl shivered at the touch, his mouth parted in a soft mewl of release allowing Jazz’s glossa to slip past his lip components.

Prowl felt a soft purr from Jazz’s frame as he deepened the kiss. Tentatively his own hands reached up to circle teasingly around the sensory horns on Jazz’s helm. Was he really going to do this, with Jazz and Optimus? Was he even ready for such level of intimacy when so much was still unsaid between the three of them?

Jazz sensed Prowl's sudden reluctance, felt him awkwardly try to pull away from him. This would not do. He buried his glossa into Prowl's mouth in an attempt to distract him, his expert hands finding sensitive spots along Prowl's armour, stroking, caressing hidden sensor nodes, long neglected. Their glossa entwined and stroked the hot wetness of each other’s mouths. They moaned into the familiar touch, their bodies yearning for more. Optimus’s engine revved at the sight of his bond mates’ passionate embrace.

Jazz pulled away and urged an almost coy Optimus closer with a gentle tug of his hand. The black and white mech slid from Prowl’s lap and positioned himself between the twitching door wings. His glossa flicked out and traced the seams along the warm sensory panels eliciting a soft cry from Prowl’s vocaliser.

Optimus smiled at the delightful breathy moans coming from Prowl, he loved to see him lose control like this. Cupping his face in his hands he tipped his head and kissed Prowl’s mouth with passionate abandon. He had never needed any encouragement to kiss him; his only regret was not experiencing such intimacy with the stoic mech sooner. It stung Optimus deeply, that fate had had to be so cruel to Prowl and Jazz in order to bring them all closer together.

Optimus's thoughts faded to trickles as Prowl’s fingers dug into the plating of his waist moaning into the kiss, arching into his frame. Jazz massaged the door wings while teasing the joints with his glossa, grinning as Prowl’s head tipped back at the pleasurable sensations it was causing. Optimus pressed his lips into Prowl’s exposed throat, nipping and sucking at sensitive cabling and sensor nodes.

Electrical static charges pulsed through their bodies at the mutual touches. Prowl tried to shift from in-between his bond mates, only to have Jazz lean back and wrap his legs around his waist tightly.

No yer not in control for this Prowler.

Prowl whimpered his nervousness heightening considerably as Optimus raked his fingers along his inner thigh armour, digging beneath plating to stroke the protoform beneath.

We want to do this for you.

We?

The black and white mech arched and cried out as both mechs increased their ministrations. Optimus’s warm palm pressed against his interface panel, teasing along the lubricated seams.

You… you both planned this…?

Jazz chuckled softly behind him, laying gentle kisses into the crook of his neck. Prowl felt his interface cover retract.

Well actually it is our CMO’s recommendation, to strengthen our bond. Optimus tilted his helm towards Prowl.

"You don't have to do this; we don't, if you're not ready for this." Optimus uttered softly into Prowl's throat and audio, his powerful, rolling vocals subdued to a gentle whisper.

Holding Optimus’s keen blue optics, Prowl quirked a crooked smile. Oh he wanted this, he wanted them both. Still the insecurity buried within him weighed him down, pulling him back. Prowl's smiled vanished as quickly as it had appeared. What if he was wrong, what if they couldn't work this out?

Optimus and Jazz cast each other a brief concerned glance. Prowl would let his worry eat at him, without ever sharing it with them. They knew it was there but Prowl had such tight control over his part of the bond that neither one of them could get close enough to him, breach his inner barriers. Convince him this was what they both wanted.

Jazz bit his lower lip and nodded at his larger bond mate. Optimus focused his attentions solely on a now obviously uncomfortable and embarrassed looking Prowl and did the only thing he knew would help Prowl relax and accept them. Accept their bond.

Prowl's doubts were washed away in a blinding rush of static charge and deep arousal; he sucked in air sharply as his valve was penetrated slowly. His intakes increased pace to quick pants as Optimus’s finger pushed deeper inside him, circling the warm, throbbing lining. Stroking stimulated, charged sensor nodes within.

Prowl felt movement behind him and found himself being laid down on the berth, his bond mates on either side of him. His body still too weak from his earlier ordeal, Prowl had no choice but to lie as another hand, Jazz’s gripped his exposed spike.

He bit back a sharp cry of surprise as Jazz stroked the full length of the pressurized spike. He reached out to grab something; anything to halt a situation that he felt was getting drastically out of hand. His efforts were stopped with a firm but not unpleasant grip on both of his wrists, pinning them both above his helm. Despite his misgivings, Prowl felt heat crawling over his frame, his arousal building, his control slipping.

Jazz and Optimus smiled at the flushed, wanton look on Prowl’s face plates, he writhed beneath their touches. Optimus’s fingers pumping into his clenching valve as Jazz leaned over to kiss the plating over his spark chamber.

Giving in to his urges and desire, Prowl bucked and moaned loudly, far too aroused to even remember what his previous doubts were. He just wanted to feel them, feel them both inside him at that very moment.

Bond with me…please…

His plea pulsed through the bond causing both mechs to moan at the intensity of his desire. Optimus removed his hand from Prowl’s wrist and allowed him to stroke his fingers down his red chassis. He ran his other hand along Jazz’s bumper, tracing circles around his head lights in light feather touches. Sitting up he kissed them both with eager want and desire. He felt Optimus thrust into his valve, filling it with aching need, while Jazz squeezed and stroked his spike with increasingly rapid movements.

The double sensation of pleasure spreading from both of his interface components made him holler as his pleasure peaked. Heat emanated from his frame in waves as Jazz’s lips teased his chest once more, driving his spark wild. With a whimper of release Prowl’s chest cracked open, bathing his bond mates with the warm glow of his pulsing needy spark. They soon followed suit and laid him down once more.

Pushing their chests together, all other movement was forgotten as their sparks flared out and reached for each other. Merging with a blinding flash the three mechs cried out simultaneously, gripping onto one another tightly as pleasure filled their circuits.

Desire, emotion, memories burst through their sparks in waves of increasing intensity. They could feel each other, be a part of each other and the world fell away around them.

Their joining was to be short lived; the affirmation of their bond was cruelly cut short by the alert klaxon of the base screaming through their audios, forcing them apart with desperate cries of frustration.

Falling onto the berth panting, their connection denied, the mechs took a few seconds to recover. Red Alert’s frantic voice sounded throughout the base.

“Decepticons have breached the perimeter, all hands prepare for battle. This is not a drill!”

“Frag!” Jazz swore loudly. “Don’t we get just one fraggin’ solar cycle in peace?”

Prowl already seemingly composed sighed and pushed himself gingerly from the berth. “This is war Jazz. I don’t think consideration of our personal time is part of their agenda.” He held out his hand to help him from the berth.

Jazz raised an orbital ridge at him. “Did you just crack a joke?”

Optimus smiled at Prowl’s incredulous glare and kissed them both in turn. “I’m sorry but we have to go Jazz. Prowl remain here you’re still too weak to…”

“No!”

Prowl’s harsh tone stopped them in their tracks. “They have all of our tactical knowledge Prime, you need me. Allow me to direct the battle from the command center.” He straightened in confident determination. “Unless I am still relieved of my command?”

Jazz smirked. He never thought he’d see the day Prowl answered back to his leader.

Optimus dwelled on it for a brief second before giving him a curt nod. “You’re hereby reinstated. Stay in the command center. I will have Ratchet, Cliffjumper and the Dinobots stay with you.”

“I’ll be fi-“

Optimus cupped his face with one hand, his piercing optics bearing onto his SIC. “Please, just in case.”

Prowl gave him a quick nod and allowed him to lead the way from the room.

****
The command center was a bustle of activity upon their arrival. Optimus demanded a report, Ironhide was the first to respond.

“We got incoming Prime.” His optics darkened ever so slightly upon seeing his three commanding officers arrive together.

“How many?” Prowl was instantly at the main viewer, analyzing the imagery.

Ironhide pressed his lip components into a thin line. “All of them.”

The bridge fell into a stunned silence at the news. Optimus uttered a low growl. “Alright Autobots we roll out, you know the drill. Prowl will be directing from here, do what he tells you to do. It might just save your sparks. Ratchet, Cliffjumper you remain here with Prowl and the Dinobots, protect the base at all costs. Let’s move!”

Optimus squeezed Prowl’s shoulder before he transformed and left. Jazz hung back for a few seconds. “You sure yer going to be alright Prowl?”

Prowl took hold of Jazz’s helm and pressed the center of his chevron against Jazz’s forehead. Jazz gave him an understanding smile and raced after his leader.

Optimus and Jazz both felt renewed determination to defeat the Decepticons for everything that they’d put them through. Prowl’s calming, gentle presence in each of their sparks eased their tension as the Decepticons came into view over the crest of the horizon.

Stay alive.

Prowl’s whisper sounded softly in both their sparks echoing through their bond as Optimus urged the Autobots forward.

The Autobots raced towards their fast approaching enemy. Everything now depended on the outcome of this battle. Megatron had never launched such an all out offensive before. If they fell here, Cybertron would fall with them.

They couldn’t afford to lose.
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Losing Control