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The Shadow of his Heart	By : Catspeaker Category: +G through L > The Loud House Views: 12692 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own The Loud House, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 11
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- 13
Competition.

Competition is what drives humanity. The need to push forever forward. The need to improve. The need to see your progress and the work you put in, to feel it, to put it to the test. That is competition.

Competition is what drove humans to crawl out of the mud and take over the earth. Competition is what led to the greatest innovations in the world. Competition is the very essence of life.

It didn't matter if you won or lost(Though it always felt better to win), it mattered that you tried. It mattered that you put skin in the game. It mattered that you tested yourself, you didn't sit on the sidelines, you took life by the balls, literally sometimes, you squeezed and you yelled in it's face, “I'm ready for you!”

There was nothing like the feeling that competition created in you, that desire to win, even if it was against yourself. Sometimes that was the best competition of all, the one where you sought to better yourself, to see if you came further than you did before. To see how much you improved over the last time.

Even if you lost, if you could say that you improved, that was a victory itself.

Competition was about living life to the fullest, it was about embracing every aspect of it, the highs and the lows. Making your life revolve around competition was about making the Grim Reaper exhausted when he finally caught up to you.

When the reaper finally came for her, she knew he'd be out of breath, he'd be panting, and he would be begging her to stop.

When the Reaper came for her, it would only be after she had life by the throat and had been squeezing every ounce out of it, every moment she could, only then would she look back at the bone head, smugly grin, and say she was ready. After a lifetime of knowing she pushed herself to be the best she could ever be. After she had pushed herself, and others to be the best they could be. She would know she had lived a life that was nothing but her beating the ever living hell out of it.

But for now? Well, Lynn Loud was only 20. She figured she had at least six more decades for her to slam dunk on life, body-check it, checkmate it, and score on it, before she had to worry about anything like meeting death.

Lynn had been living her best life lately! She was in her second year at Wolverine University, doing good in all her classes, and working on her Sports Psychology degree. More importantly, she was Point Guard on the Women's basketball team, and was already being scouted by the WNBA.

The best part of course, is that she'd managed to come to Wolverine University with her best friend in the world and teammate Margo, who was playing right next to her. Going to University and having a best friend right with her meant an easier adjustment time. Not only that, her and Margo having such great synergy together meant both had taken off like rockets on the Basketball team and at the end of their Freshman year had even managed to help take them to the finals.

This year though, Lynn was ready to take them not only to the finals, but to the Championship and add another Trophy to her impressive collection.
Lynn still held dreams of being an Olympic Athlete as well. They were going to be coming around again in a few years, and by then she figured she'd be ready. But in the mean time, getting her degree, bringing her team to the championship and going Pro might be good enough.

But even with all of her accolades, all of her success, her best friend with her at college, all the new friends she had made, and the fact her team had just won last night, that wasn't why she was positively giddy right now.

None of that, which typically did make Lynn Jr happy, was the reason she felt her heart almost exploding right now.

Instead it had everything to do with the message she had received from her younger sister Lola only a few hours ago.

Lynn was currently laying in the small bed within the dorm room she shared with her best friend Margo. The room was tinier than the one she had shared with her sister Lucy over the years, slightly more cramped with only a few feet of space between her bed and Margo's own.

Still it was more than enough for both girls. The soft blue and maize colored walls and carpet were already covered with their favorite sports team posters, calendars for the games the Wolverines would be playing, as well as events and parties at the college campus. Their parents had even gotten them a min-fridge the two shared and kept stocked with water and their favorite sports drinks.

At 5'3, Lynn's hope for a larger growth spurt had never come along, and she ended up a very short girl. But that was okay, she'd come to accept it, and even embrace the advantages it came with. Despite being short, Lynn was fast, powerful and agile.

She was a bundle of speed and energy that exploded on the court floor, around her larger opponents, out maneuvering them, and juking around them with ease. She wasn't making as many slam dunks as she dreamed she would be, but she was the queen of lay-ups and shooting from anywhere on the court.

Her chestnut hair had only gotten longer over the years, which sometimes made it annoying when she'd have to bundle it up for a game, but she had decided to grow it out in an attempt to look more feminine. Which succeeded when she let it down to flow over her shoulders.

The freckles on her cheeks still lit up when ever she smiled, which was often, and her deep brown eyes only complimented those smiles as they matched her hair.

While she had never developed in the chest or rear area as much as some of her other sisters, she still at least had a chest and curves, even if they were on the smaller side. In some ways Lynn was satisfied with that, however, as a giant chest or ass would just get in the way when she played.

That and she figured she made up for it with her sheer fitness. Lynn was a very athletic girl, with toned arms that showed her definition every time they flexed. Her calves were made of steel, and her thighs had enough definition to truly crush someone's skull if she wanted to. Her abs were shredded and stood out every time she wore her tank top to exercise in. As for her booty not being maybe as round as some girls, it was the definition of firm and tight.

Lynn was an attractive girl in the end, it came in her infectious smile, bright eyes, and the way she had sculpted her own body into a living roman statue. It drew attention from others and intimidated them. This short athletic firecracker of a girl.

At the moment, Margo was currently out on a date, which gave Lynn the room to herself. Something Lynn was happy about.

She didn't want to have to explain her giddiness or why she couldn't stop smiling right now. Even though Lynn smiled a lot by nature, the size of her smile, and the way she had to keep grabbing her pillow to bury her face into it and squeal every few minutes would have probably raised more than a few eyebrows.

As she laid on her bed, wearing a pair of red gym shorts and a blue Wolverine University T-shirt, she flicked over the message from her sister Lola again.

Lynn
I need to know your class schedule and dorm assignment for next year. I'm arranging things so that Linky will be a student at Wolverine soon. Since you'll be the only person he knows on Campus, I want to make sure he's near enough to you and has a schedule that allows for him to spend time with you so he isn't too lonely. DO NOT TELL HIM THIS. It's a surprise, he doesn't know I'm planning this yet.
Thank you Lynnie!
Your favorite sister, Lola

Her Stinkin was coming to her University! Her Stinkin was going to be going to school with her again! Her little, not so little brother, would be joining her on campus and she would get to see him again every single day!

She flopped onto her back and threw her arms out, staring up at the ceiling and sighed. This news was the best and worst present she could have received.

The giddy part of her didn't want to think about that bad part. The giddy happy part was like an addiction, it didn't want to think of the consequences, or the pain, or the negative feelings that would come after the fact. All it wanted to do was revel in the high, in the fix, in those joyful beautiful happy emotions that were flowing through her. To pump that substance directly into her veins and ride that bliss.

How long had it been since she had her last fix? Really, really had it?

Just about a year. When she stopped going to the same High School as him. When she stopped getting up in the same house as him. When she stopped sharing the same bathroom he used. When she stopped eating at the same table he did.

One year. One full year away from him, from his presence, from his scent, from his sweet smile. One year away from his big blue eyes, and his soft white hair.

Going away was supposed to break the addiction. One year away from him was supposed to be what got her clean. A year of focusing on nothing but her sports and academic career. A year of parties, a year of being 'an adult' with her best friend.

It was supposed to break the addiction and make her normal. She was supposed to become a normal girl, a normal woman, meet some jock on campus with a killer six pack and biceps to die for. One that could match her gain for gain in the gym and out on the field.

It wasn't like there weren't plenty of guys like that at Wolverine University. They were known for their sports programs just as much as their academic, they sought to crush every other University they could in regards to both. Wolverine had serious Ivy League envy, and did everything it could to muscle it's way into that circle.

But despite seeing some handsome and attractive guys out there, ones she could honestly say were good looking, she just...didn't have any interest in them. Just as she hadn't had any interest in any of the guys at school growing up.

It had been enough to where her friends and family wondered if she was gay, or bi maybe like her sister Luna. But that wasn't it either, part of her wished that was it. Being gay would have been so much simpler than what her issue was.

No, she did like a boy, there was one boy that she was VERY attracted to. A boy who drove her crazy with how much he got her going. A boy whose sweat she absolutely adored the smell of. A boy who whenever she competed against him made her so hot and bothered, made her so wet, it was everything she could do to not force herself on him.

How many times growing up, did she tackle him and wrestle with him, 'play fight' with him over the years, just so she could feel his body against her own. Telling him she wouldn't stop until he pinned her, or she pinned him. Just so she could feel his hands touching her. All the times she had fouled him in pick up basketball games, or checked him when they played street hockey. All the times she dunked him, or picked him up and threw him in the pool.

All so she could feel his body, so she could have the right excuse to be close to him, and breathe him in.

And, it wasn't like it hadn't helped him! If she hadn't been there, all he would of done is played his videogames and read his comic books all day! Her being there and forcing him outside, forcing him to play with her had done him good! It had whipped him into at least semi-shape, made it so he could hold his own in several sports, and was the reason he kept fit even today!

So, so all those times she had been pushing him, riding him, dragging him around, forcing him to compete with her, had been for his own good!

Even if it made her sneak off into her room, or into the shower and bite her lip, close her eyes, and frigg herself to an explosive orgasm. Even if it meant she'd stolen his underwear before to breathe in his primal masculine scent. Even if she dreamed about him, if she watched him when he wasn't looking. Even if she had snuck into his room once to lay in his bed and pleasure herself over and over.

As much as she had wanted to, she had never, ever, acted on those impulses, urges and desires with him. She had never forced anything on him. She may have touched parts of him that were intimate many times over the years, just by sheer luck from how often she wrestled with him, but she never really tried anything with him.

Not that she hadn't ever looked for a sign he was interested. Looked for any indication he might look at her in the same way she looked at him. Looked for any reason to go further, any chance to take things to a different level with him. All he would have to do is ask, all he would have to do is express curiosity and she would of done anything for him. Anything.

Anything he wanted, without hesitation.

Happily, with a smile on her face.

But either she was blind to his signs and signals, or they never came.

She remembered hearing about other kids who grew up playing 'doctor' together, and explored one another. She had silently wished her and Lincoln had done so. They were so close in age, only a single year apart. So very close. He had been her constant companion until the others were born. He had been the baby for three years until Lucy had come. She had been his 'big' sister and had done everything with him. They had played together, bathed together, ate together, everything.

She had been the first to go to school and prepare him, the first to walk him to school, the first to protect him from bullies. The first to be proud of him. The first to pick on him and bully him (with love of course), she had wanted to be his first everything.

Even if they were so different, she loved those differences. She loved how he saw the world so differently from her, how he had insight into things she didn't. They were thought and action together, fire and water, yin and yang. They complimented one another, and made up for each other's deficits. He made her appreciate abstract things, take stock of situations and think. She made him get up and move, to get out there and grab life and enjoy it.

She loved him. She loved him so much.

She had loved him the hardest in middle school, when she had even cried herself to sleep over it. It hurt her so much to see him and always greet him with a smile. A hug, a tackle, a headlock, to not tell him she was grinning because she was with him. She was active and happy because he was around.

She looked over to the bulletin board that was hanging up over her bed. It had a number of newspaper articles from middle school and high school written about her and the sports teams she'd been on. They all had the same byline...

Written by correspondent Lincoln Loud.

It was in middle school when Lincoln had discovered he had a passion for journalism. He practically founded the journalism club and the school newspaper. He carried it on into High School, and of course having her brother be the senior editor she INSITED he write all the stories involving the girl's sports teams.

To Lynn's eyes they might as well all have been love letters written to her.

But she had sworn, promised not to do anything to him. She had promised not to try and force anything for him. Herself, Leni, and Lucy. The three sisters with the 'problem'. The three sisters, three of the 'other' sisters made promise to leave Lincoln alone.

Lori, Luna and Luan. They had scolded the other three, Leni, Lucy and herself.

It wasn't fair. Those three all had someone they loved, someone they were already with. They didn't understand the loneliness that consumed her, Leni and Lucy. They didn't get it...

But on some level, Lynn knew they were right. It wasn't normal, and it wasn't healthy. Her crush, her desire, her obsession, it was perverted and wrong. Lynn knew this, she intellectually understood this, but her heart refused to accept it.

Out of the three of them, Lynn believed she was probably the one who understood how wrong it was the most. Leni was, well, she was Leni. Leni didn't get certain things, or she got them and just thought they were so dumb so she didn't care about following them.

In Leni's mind, she saw herself as happy with Lincoln, and thought she would make Lincoln happy, ergo there was no reason she should feel ashamed or bother holding back with him. That's how Lynn understood Leni's mind to work.

Lori had to keep a constant watch on Leni those last couple years, and it was only Leni getting picked up by a design company in New York that really took her out of the picture. Plus with her living with Luan and Bennie, she was taken care of.

Her old roommate Lucy was a weirdo Goth girl, and was completely into those forbidden romance stories and all sorts of other strange things that Lynn didn't quite get. So of course Lucy was drawn to the morally wrong nature of her attraction.

But Lucy had made a promise, Lucy had promised she wouldn't act on her feelings either. It was for Lincoln's sake after all, she had at least said that she loved Lincoln enough she preferred him being free to seek what ever girl he wanted on his own.

And there was another girl, or at least had been. There had been Ronnie Anne, and Lynn really liked Ronnie Anne. Ronnie had the best traits of both Lucy and Lynn. She was athletic, and sporty, but she also liked some of the same dorky hobbies Lincoln did. She complimented him, and she shared interests with him, she brought new things to him while also being able to connect with him.

In so many ways, Lynn had been jealous of Ronnie, but at the same time saw her as evidence that Lincoln could like her too. Ronnie Anne was just as tough as she was, just as physical, and liked to tease Lincoln almost as much as herself. So maybe that meant, Lincoln would have enjoyed being with her too.

But somehow Stinkin had messed things up with Ronnie Anne, which had only made things worse for Lynn because that gave her heart some secret dumb hope that he would suddenly look to her...and like that eager puppy she could be, she would jump on him and give him everything and anything he wanted. She would have been happy just being used to help him get over Ronnie if it meant she had the possibility of knowing his touch, knowing his love.

But that was why she needed to get away. She understood, her thinking was aberrant, dysfunctional, and depraved. Going away for a year, it was supposed to be rehab, it was supposed to break the addiction!

She had even made sure to lose her virginity. Finding the most attractive meat-head she could at one of the parties, and giving herself to him. It had been disappointing, until she started imagining it was Lincoln giving it to her. She got so caught up in imagining that white haired freckled face looking back up at her while she rode him, it had caused her to cum harder than she ever had. She had even spoken his name as she did so.

It horrified her when the deed was done.

That was why she felt horror and joy at the same time. Lola didn't know about her obsession, Lola didn't know about her crush. Lola just saw her older brother as needing someone close by he could rely on in a strange and overwhelming new place and had made sure Lynn was there. After all, who better to keep an eye on him, then his sister, the one only a single year older than him.

She didn't know she was basically offering a junkie her favorite fix on a silver platter.

Lynn made the conscious decision to not feel guilty at the moment. She just, she just couldn't. She couldn't fall down the ladder of self-hatred right now. She made the decision to not loathe herself. There would be plenty of time for that later.

Instead she decided to fall back into her addiction willingly. She decided to shoot up, get high and fall into the bliss that was filling her heart.

Holding her phone in front of her face, she flicked to her social media, and began to gaze longingly at the gallery of pictures involving her brother. Her other hand slowly crept down her toned abs, and into the top of her gym shorts as she gave in to her desires.

Section Break

The first day and night of the convention had been...unconventional to say the least for Lincoln. It had been bad enough he had gone in, knowing his little sister was there, and knowing how he felt about her. Only for her to then reveal she had been feeling the same way about him, and for the two of them to consummate their relationship.

While that had led to a near nervous breakdown and actual full blown panic attack in the middle of the night afterwards on his part, they had weathered that storm together and Lincoln had come out the other side...mostly convinced it was okay to do this with Lucy.

Mostly convinced. He still had his doubts. After all, it was illegal, and highly immoral, and there were societal taboos that came along with it. And everyone in society would consider him a freak and shun him if it were ever found out, and he'd probably go to jail. And his family would probably be horrified... and...

Okay, okay he was starting to talk himself out of it now.

But every time he would start to feel like that, when he would begin to question just what the hell he was doing, he would turn and look at her...and see that beautiful happy smile, see the way she looked at him, and his heart would want to burst.

Just hearing how her typically monotone emotionless voice had picked up the slightest hint of happiness in it ever since their 'official' recognition of their relationship status was enough for him.

He had so much fun with her, he loved being around her. He loved how happy she made him, and how she felt in his arms.

He secretly loved the connection they had, the shared history of growing up together, having fond memories they could already recall together...knowing they were building new ones, enhanced with the new connection they had....

And honestly, honestly...Oh fucking god was she hot. Lincoln kept going back to knowing his sisters were pretty, and also understanding as a brother you were supposed to think that to be a good brother. But he also knew his sisters WERE pretty. All of them.

It was those genes they inherited from their parents, but in particular from their mother. He understood his Dad had been an attractive guy when he was younger, but he knew more it was his Mom who had been considered the looker. Even today, he recognized his mom was a beautiful woman at her age, and she had passed down those genes to all of her children.

Even to him, as much as he hated thinking about it. Lincoln had never been ugly. He was a doofus, something of a dork, but he had always been cute. Boyishly cute, and probably would be all of his life, but he was not plain or unattractive.

But that extended even more for his sisters. What made him boyishly cute made all of them beautiful, adorable, and in some cases sexy.

He had only started thinking of that recently because of Lucy. Lucy was sexy. Lucy was hot.

When he had gave in, and decided to just go with it, the rest of the weekend had more than proven it to him. Lucy and He had snuck off in the middle of the second day, to run back to their hotel room, just to grab a quickie.

Well actually no, they had ran off because Lincoln had wanted to perform oral sex on her.

Heh,even putting it like that was saying it lightly.

No, all day it had been a growing urge, and every moment he was alone, or Clyde had his back turned, his hands were all over Lucy. She kept flirting and playing back with him too. Giggling softly and sweetly, favoring him with smiles, pressing herself back against him.

It had culminated in him whispering in her ear, “I want to eat your pussy.”

It had been a need in him since the day before. When Lucy had given him the best blow job he'd ever experienced in his life. She had completely destroyed him with that act, it had been so sinful and taboo, like a blitzkrieg strike on his senses the way she had done it...that making love to her had seemed the more 'pure and innocent' act by comparison.

Maybe that had been part of her strategy.

But it had built a need in him to return the favor. As much as she said it wasn't a competition, that he didn't need to 'pay her back', he felt a need as a man, to show her he was just as capable dammit!

So the two had made an excuse for the need to return to their room. Trying their best to keep their hands off of one another as they ran into the elevator, as they had taken it up to their floor, and had managed to barely get into their room without making a scene.

In these moments, when he was horny, his misgivings vanished. Maybe it was because he was a guy, or maybe it was because Lucy was just that damn good. Either way, when he was this primed, this ready, those doubts went away.

They had sucked face, fondled one another, gazed at one another (As much as he could with Lucy's bangs always in the way) and after he'd sucked on her tongue, kissed his way down her neck, and grabbed two handfuls of her ass and squeezed, he pushed her over.

Physically put his hands on her shoulders and shoved her over onto the bed. She had squealed and gave him the biggest grin he'd ever seen.

That had been when he went down on his knees, grabbed hold of those cute tights with their pink bats all over them, and yanked those and her panties down far enough past her thighs to where he could squeeze his head in-between them.

He had gone after her, like a thirsty man in the desert going after a water fountain. Lincoln had practically attacked her pussy with his mouth and tongue. He had managed to surprise Lucy with how savagely he had gone down on her, how needing he seemed to stick his tongue inside of her, to suckle her little button, and blatantly make out with her lower lips. There was no hesitation on his part, her brother seemed intent on smashing his face between her legs with all he had.

Lucy had squeezed her thighs around his head, ran her fingers through his white hair, grabbed his scalp, arched her back, and moaned louder than she ever had before. It had been perfect, better than she could have ever wanted or imagined. When his tongue went even further south and plunged into her rosebud, it had almost broken her with the sheer giddy, perverted joy of just how much her big brother seemed to desire her...that he was willing to stick his tongue ANYWHERE on her.

After she had came, several times, and begged him to stop because she just couldn't handle it anymore...he had finally, finally withdrew his tongue, finally pulled his head out from beneath her thighs..

And then rolled her over, pulled his pants down, and fucked her from behind like an animal in heat, the clap of her cheeks against his hips so loud and audible in the room with how hard he was thrusting. Rutting in her, grabbing a handful of her hair and shoving forward until he exploded inside of her, and his sticky mess was left to drip down her thighs.

He had collapsed on the bed next to her after that. Him on his back, his jeans around his ankles, sticky cock having been spent, resting against his thigh, his head turned to look at her. Her, on her stomach, her tights and panties pulled around her knees, her ass in the air, her face turned to look back at him.

They both panted, smiled, and reached their hands towards one another, entwining them and enjoying the moment.

It was a new milestone for the new couple. The first time they had 'Fucked'. Still an intimate act, but not one that was drawn out, it was not love making. It was an eager, happy, physical act that had been based around them both just wanting to satisfy their bodies and one another. It was playful and maybe had taken only 10 minutes total, but it had been immensely satisfying to both.

There was always the temptation to stay in their room the rest of the day. As much of a dork as Lincoln was, right now, in the face of being in his brand new relationship with his brand new sexy girlfriend, superheroes, manga, and anime were less interesting than what was in the room with him.

But, both understood they had a role to play. Much as they discussed faking one of them being sick to take care of the other, they knew they couldn't arouse Clyde's suspicion too much. So they cleaned up and returned to enjoy the rest of the con.

And it went like that for that day and the last. They spent the night enjoying one another, getting in as much sex and cuddle time as they could, well into the morning. Lincoln deciding to put all worry off and enjoy the time he could with Lucy. Lucy only to eagerly happy to accept it all. Both lost count of the number of times they'd ended up jumping one another's bones, and the last day, even with it only being a few hours, it had been near torture to not be able to kiss and hug one another, and hang on one another in public.

Neither Lincoln or Lucy were adverse to PDA. Neither were the type to feel embarrassed to hold hands, hug, kiss, or lean against one another in public. Both had a nature that wanted to be close to the person they love and display it. But they had to tamp it down with Clyde and Haiku around. Lucy hadn't felt comfortable enough just yet to let Lincoln know, just how much Haiku was aware of. She didn't want to spoil the weekend.

Eventually it came to a close. The convention was over, and classes would be starting up again. Clyde would have a long drive ahead of him back to Capital City, while Lucy and Haiku would be back at school tomorrow. Lincoln of course had his own classes, but his started later and he didn't have much of a drive. Clyde decided he would return later anyway, and wanted to spend his last couple hours down in Royal Woods with Haiku, so Lucy and Lincoln dropped the two of them off at Clyde's place.

Clyde promised to call Lincoln later, he wanted to talk to him about a few things from the weekend, and Lucy hugged her best friend, promising to talk to her when they met up in school the next day.

After that, back in his red SUV, Lucy and Lincoln began the journey home. During the drive, Lincoln had reached over to take Lucy's hand in his own and hold it, as he went out of his way to take the scenic route to get back.

Now the real test was coming. They'd be back home, they'd have to hide what they were doing, from all their other sisters. From their parents. Lincoln actually began to look depressed, his face falling into a frown as they got closer and closer...

Noticing, Lucy spoke up, “Lincoln pull over, stop.”

Without hesitation, Lincoln did so, pulling his van over to the shoulder of the road, and throwing it into park. He let the engine idle as he turned to gaze back at his sister.

Lucy brought his hand up and kissed the top of it, she smiled softly at him, “You still have me Lincoln. I'm still yours, even if we have to hide it now.”

Lincoln gave a weak smile in return, before he looked back over the steering wheel and the smile left his face, “I know Luce. But I'm not looking forward to tiptoeing around everyone. This is going to be difficult for both of us.”

Lucy continued to try and reassure her brother, “Lincoln, everyone at home already knows we're very close, that we've become more so after Melanie left the picture, we won't have to hide too much.” She gave a smirk, “We'll just have to wait until everyone goes to bed before you sneak into my room and give me what I deserve...”

Lincoln flushed, his lips turning up into an embarrassed smile, as Lucy giggled at him, noticing it. Lincoln gave a groan before he added, “It's just, we're going to have to do this for a long time Luce. How long until we can have a place of our own so we don't have to worry about what we do in front of others...and even then, if we do--”

Lucy interjected “When we do Lincoln. When we do.”

Lincoln amended his statement, “When we do have our own place, even then, our family and friends are probably going to start asking questions. Hell, we'll probably have to move out of Michigan if we really want to have any kind of a public life together--”

Lucy put her finger up over Lincoln's lips and shushed him gently, “Shhh...Lincoln, you're doing it again. You're over-thinking things. You're getting yourself worked up over problems we haven't even gotten to yet. Just enjoy what we have for now beloved. Enjoy the present, we'll face those obstacles when they reach us.”

Lincoln found himself flushing slightly again when Lucy used her poetic flourish. He enjoyed it. His younger sister the artist, the poet, and her creative soul that saw everything as one big story being told. He slowly looked back to her and nodded.

“Okay Luce. I'll try to worry about today, but we'll have to deal with those problems eventually.”

Lucy smiled in reply, “I know my love. I know. But for right now, why don't you kiss me, in case I don't get to kiss you the rest of the night.”

Lincoln didn't need any convincing for that. He unbuckled his seat-belt just so he could reach further across the front seat, Lucy in turn did the same to her own. The two teenagers reaching the middle together in time for their hands to come up and take hold of one another.

Their lips met, eyes closed, and they kissed one another with a longing and passion reserved for couples being separated from one another, and that might as well have been what was coming with how they would have to tamp down on their activities when they arrived home.

Trying to store up as much of that love and desire to be open with one another as much as possible, their lips parting finally, both panting. They sealed their long romantic embrace with a gentle peck to one another before they pulled back and Lincoln nodded with a long drawn out sigh.

“Alright Luce, I guess it's time to go home.”

Starting up the van again, buckling their seat belts, they held hands the rest of the way home, before they would have to put on the facade of being a normal brother and sister again, not one that also happened to be lovers after the weekend.

Section Break

Hours later, after having arrived home, unpacked and settled back in, Lucy and Lincoln were forced to separate. Well, forced may have been a strong word, but Lucy had some school work she had been putting off, and the girl was honestly introverted and did enjoy time to herself. Lincoln, meanwhile had spent time with the rest of his sisters, having given each of them a souvenir from the convention, though Lily had received the most. Several how to draw books and a couple of manga and comics she had expressed interest in were delivered to the 9 year old by her eager brother.

Lily had practically demanded the rest of Lincoln's time, and Lincoln was only to happy to give it to the baby of the family, his special little companion.

But it was around 8pm when his phone went off and he saw he was getting a call from Lori of all people.

It wasn't overly weird for Lincoln to get calls from Lori, she called all of her younger siblings pretty regularly to keep tabs on them, but he had not been expecting it all the same. He had patted Lily on the head, standing up from where he had been drawing with her, after having given her the practice books to start with, and accepted the call.

“Hey big sis, what's going on?” He casually asked.

Lori's voice was friendly, “Hey little bro! I'm good! How did you like the comic convention?”

Lincoln blinked a little in surprise, it was always eerie how Lori seemed to know what all of her siblings were doing, even though she had been moved out of the house years ago.

“Uh, it was good. Lots of fun, how did you know?” He asked.

“Duh Lincoln, I stalk your social media. Just like everyone elses, how else is Mom and Dad going to get regular updates about what you're all doing?” She responded.

Lori took her job as big sister seriously, to the point she might as well have been a third parent to her younger siblings. Of course, she was the 'cool' parent, more understanding in many cases, and willing to blunt Mom and Dad's wrath or misunderstanding on their behalf. But she also was completely willing to insert herself in your life if she thought you were doing something dumb. Of all the siblings that needed to be kept in the dark about himself and Lucy, Lori was the primary one. At least as far as Lincoln was concerned.

Lincoln chuckled, “Right, you ever going to stop checking up on us?”

He could hear Lori's playful grin on the other end, “Literally never little bro. Anyway, this is more than just a social call, I need to talk to you about something...” Lori paused for a moment, before continuing, “Something that might be a little sensitive...”

Lincoln felt a chill go down his spine. Oh no. oh no. Had the pictures he posted online been too revealing of him and Lucy? Lincoln could of swore they were innocent. That the status updates he shared wouldn't of pointed out anything untoward happening between him and Lucy. But then Lori was always so perceptive, did she see right through them?!

He was anxious, he had to force his breathing to stay level and measured as he responded, “Sensitive? What do you mean Lori? What's up?”

He could hear Lori feeling just as anxious on the other end of the line. Was she really going to ask him about Lucy? About how close the two of them had become recently? Lori had eyes and ears everywhere, were maybe his other sisters talking to her? Had they begun to suspect something?

Lori eventually spoke up, “Lincoln... It's about Ronnie Anne.”

That, had not at all been what Lincoln had been expecting to hear. That had honestly thrown the young man for a loop. Everything he was worried about was suddenly blown away by hearing that name. An entirely different and unrecognizable feeling came over him instead.

He didn't know what it was. Some sort of strange mix of melancholy and nostalgia filled him all at once, just hearing her name.

He found his voice and managed to stammer back, “R-R-R-Ronnie Anne? Wh-wh-what about her? Did something happen?”

He had no idea why his sister was bringing up that name. The name of the girl who had meant so much to him at one time. The girl who had first introduced him to the concept of what a crush was. The girl who introduced him to what it meant to truly romantically love another person.

He had been going with the naive hope he would never be reminded of her again, considering how he had left things.

Now suddenly he was worried all over again. He felt a faint fear, a horror gripping his heart that something happened to the girl he had loved so much once, the girl he still felt like he had so much to say to.

Lori's voice came softly, reassuring him, she almost sounded surprised at his reaction, “Lincoln no, it's nothing like that. Ronnie Anne is fine. She still lives with her Mom and Grandparents on the floor right above Bobby and I.”

Lori could hear Lincoln breathe a sigh of relief. That struck his older sister. Lori was able to pick up Lincoln certainly still cared for the girl. She took that as a good sign.

Lincoln responded, “Okay Lori. Then, what about her?” Finding out there was nothing wrong with his old best friend and former girlfriend, Lincoln was a little taken aback over why Lori was calling about her.

Lori breathed in deeply before she responded, “Lincoln, Bobby and I have been talking. We really think it's unfair we have to tiptoe around the topic of you two around one another, and especially around your nephew and niece.”

Lincoln felt sudden guilt come over him as he listened, already he had an idea of where this was going, guilt filled with a sudden trepidation. He didn't say anything, instead letting his eldest sister continue.

“It's time for the two of you to start talking again. Before all the drama happened, she was your best friend, but more than that.” Lori frowned as she spoke her next words, she knew this was a difficult topic for her brother, but she knew this was also more important than him. This was her mom side coming out, along with her big sister side.

“More than that, you haven't visited down here since you two broke up. You're young and have less obligations than I do. You can travel more freely, I miss you Lincoln. Bobby misses you, and your niece and nephew miss you. I don't want to have to come up there all the time just to see you. I want you to travel down here sometimes and spend time with us. We're your family too, Bobby is, Lian and Marco are. We love you, and I want you to feel comfortable visiting us. That means you have to make up with Ronnie Anne.”

Lincoln had sat silently as he listened to every word Lori spoke. Each of them hitting him like a strike directly to his heart. For a boy like Lincoln, who always put his family first, it made him feel particularly low.

He hadn't visited since Ronnie Anne and he had broken up. He had only seen Lori when she'd come up to visit, and it wasn't fair to her. He didn't have children to think about, or a career. He was a college student who was employed by his own father. It wasn't like his Dad wouldn't give him time off to go see his sister and niece and nephew. She was right.

Lincoln felt so damn guilty, he brought his hand up and squeezed the bridge of his nose and sighed, “Lori, you're right. I know you're right. You know I love you, Bobby and Marco and Lina. I didn't mean to stay away, it's just...something that sort of happened.”

He could hear the softening in his sisters voice as she responded, “I know Lincoln. I know this is also not the easiest thing for you, but Bobby has already talked to Ronnie Anne about it. That's why I'm talking to you too. It's something all of us want.”

Lincoln felt that strange anxiousness fill him as he listened, “Even Ronnie Anne?”

There was a pause on the other end before Lori continued, “She's open to the idea. In fact, she's going to be the one to call you first. She's just been waiting for me to talk to you and get the go ahead.”

Lincoln leaned up against the wall, looking down at his shoes as if they were suddenly the most interesting thing in the world. Listening, the phone against his ear, he couldn't understand everything he was feeling. As if this weekend hadn't been enough for him already.

After everything with Lucy, how much he loved her, how much they had done together already, and the weekend he spent with her, Ronnie Anne coming back into his life was just one more thing to completely throw his life askew.

Of course his feelings involving Ronnie Anne were...complicated. But right now he told himself, it was all for the sake of his family. It was all for the sake of those he loved. Lincoln could undergo anything for the sake of his family. All those confused feelings and emotions could be put aside if he focused on it being for his family.

Finally he responded, “I'm good with it Lori. I'm open to it. I don't hate Ronnie Anne, I never have. It might be a little weird at first, but it's for Lina and Marco and you, and Bobby.”

There was another pause at the other end, before he heard Lori responded, he knew she was smiling. “That...makes me so happy to hear Lincoln. I'm so proud of you, I want you to know that. Not just for this, but for everything else you do. I've always known I can rely on you more than anyone else in the family.”

That made another feeling of guilt wash over Lincoln once more, as he contemplated just what Lori would think if she knew what Lucy and He had been doing all weekend. If she knew that he fully considered Lucy to be his girlfriend at the moment.

He shoved that guilt down and answered, “Aww, anything for you Lori, you know that.”

Lori laughed softly, “I know little bro, it's one of the many reasons I love you. Alright, I'm going to tell Bobby and Ronnie Anne. I don't know when she'll call you, but you should expect a call from her soon. Maybe it means, we'll get to see you again soon too?”

Lincoln genuinely smiled to himself. He loved all of his sisters in different and unique ways. He loved Lori because of how much responsibility she took on, even with her own family now, in making sure the rest of them were happy and doing well. He loved that she trusted him so implicitly with that responsibility involving the others too.

“Of course Lori! I hope so. It would be nice to visit Great Lakes City again.” he replied.

“Alright little bro, I'll hold you to that. I'll talk to you later okay? Love you.”

“Love you too Lori-loo.” They ended their call.

Lincoln folded his arms as he went over the ramifications of the conversation.

Ronnie Anne was going to call him. It had been three years since they'd spoken. Three years since they'd parted ways. Three years since he told her they couldn't be together anymore.

He looked up at the ceiling and thought back. Thought back to when he had broken things off between them, for her own good. She had been so angry, but hadn't she seen what he did? He knew they were drifting apart, and he wanted her to be free to pursue the other guy. That other guy and Ronnie were practically an item at that point, Lincoln had just been in the way.

No, he had made the right decision, and his relationship with Lucy was proof of that. He didn't regret breaking up with her he told himself.

But, Ronnie Anne and him could be friends again, it wouldn't be weird or strange... they would be doing it for their family. Family was just as important to Ronnie Anne as it was to Lincoln. They could come to an understanding based on that.

A small part of him felt something he really didn't know how to comprehend. A strange small little part of him was excited. Why though? Why was he excited about talking to Ronnie Anne again? He knew she wasn't interested in him. That's why they had broken up. He also had Lucy now. He needed to shut that other part of him up, kick it back into the dark recesses of his mind and forget about it. He had something else, something better. Yes, maybe it was difficult for most people to understand, but Lincoln was happy with it.

There was just so much going on in his life now. Hearing all of this, having it all happen was just so overwhelming when he stopped to consider it. Just one of these two things would have been enough to upset him and make his life difficult, but both at once was almost too much. No, No, he refused to let himself dwell on any of it.

It was like Lucy said, take it as it came. For right now, he wanted to spend time with Lily. Lily was his bastion of normalcy, Lily was his bastion of safety. His littlest sister was the one who looked at him with the most honest and innocent adoration. She was the one he was always his best self with. When he was with Lily, all he could think about was making sure he was doing right by her.

She asked him who had called, and he had been honest in mentioning it was Lori. Lily was almost a little sad that Lori hadn't talked to her too, but Lincoln had assured her it was just some boring grown up stuff they were talking about.

Eventually Lily had to go to bed, and Lincoln found himself wanting to be alone in his room. He had been laying on his bed when his phone vibrated and he saw he had a message from Lucy.

Opening it up, his eyes went wide as the contents began to load up on his screen. It was a series of pictures from his gothic sister, ones of her slowly lifting her shirt up, and showing him the goodies she had underneath, with the simple message 'thinking of you' added to them.

He had half a mind to steal down to her room then, but he knew Lana, Lola, and Lisa were all still up. It was the first night home and already he was getting hot and bothered wanting to get down the hall and into Lucy's room to respond to the pictures she was sending him. But it was just too dangerous right now, so he'd have to settle for jerking himself off, looking over the treat she had been so kind to share with him.

He made a mental note to start trying to find reasons for him and Lucy to take trips together, even small ones here and there. Anywhere he could get her alone so the two could really enjoy themselves. He was just thinking that and starting to reach down and unzip his pants when suddenly his phone started vibrating in his hands.

Looking up at it, a number and name flashed across the screen.

Ronnie Anne.

He had never deleted her name from his contacts. It was still there, and his phone continued to vibrate and ring as the call came.

His heart began to beat in his chest faster and faster, nervousness gripping him as he contemplated whether or not to respond. He only had a few moments to think about it or she'd end up going to voice mail.

Despite his fear, despite his anxiousness, despite his worry, he decided he would respond. He was doing it for Lori after all. He was doing it for his niece and nephew.

And he didn't hate Ronnie Anne.

He had never hated Ronnie Anne.

He hit accept with a swallow and put the phone up to his ear, his voice coming haltingly, “H-h-hello?”

There was a long pause on the other end. But part of him had expected something like that. He knew this couldn't be easy for her either. The familiar feminine, slightly husky voice responded, “La-Lincoln?”

Lincoln smiled nervously in response, “Y-yeah it's me. How are you Ronnie Anne, it's been awhile?”

The voice on the other end sounded just as nervous, just as anxious, “Heh, Hey Lincoln, yeah it has been a while hasn't it? I guess I'm good over all. How about you?”

Lincoln's heart was going a million miles a minute. He didn't know why, but a deep flush had come to his cheeks, “Oh I'm good. I'm good I suppose. You know, doing the community college thing so I can help out at home.”

Her voice came back, he knew she was smiling, “That's just like you. Always the family man.” He heard her take a deep breath, “So, you went to youma-con this weekend right?”

That surprised Lincoln, he was curious how she knew that. They weren't friends anymore on social media, did she hear from someone else? “Y-yeah, how did you know that?”

He heard Ronnie Anne's voice respond sounding slightly guilty, “I uh, sort of talked to Clyde while you were there. I was kinda feeling things out. Sounds like you had fun.”

That surprised Lincoln. His eyes went wide. She had talked to Clyde? Clyde hadn't said a single thing about it either. Was that what Clyde had been wanting to talk to him about?

He responded, “Yeah, it was a good time over all. Got to see some interesting panels, picked up a few things I'd been looking for. Hung out with Clyde. Kinda sucks he and I go to different colleges right now.”

He could hear Ronnie Anne nodding, “Yeah, I get that. I bet you miss him. Sounds cool though, I wouldn't of minded going there myself.”

That took Lincoln aback. Ronnie talking about going to an anime convention. But then he had to remind himself...Ronnie was something of a dork herself. Oh yeah, she covered it up well. She was cool, with her skate boarding, athleticism, social activism and just her general attitude and nature. Looking at her, you'd never guess she actually liked Anime and Manga and other things like that. But she had a hidden dork side. It was one of the things the two had bonded over. Videogames in particular.

Lincoln gave a slightly playful laugh, “Would you have cosplayed as Anna again? Remember when you did that for Halloween and I went as Johnny, the horse racer lost on the other side of the border from Season 2?”

Adios Anna, Adios was a telenova Ronnie's family and Ronnie herself had been particularly invested in when she was younger. About a brave village girl named Anna fighting bandits in her home town right across the Rio Grande. In Season 2 they had introduced a love interest for her, a young gringo horse racer from America hot on the heels of the same bandit gang Anna had been fighting.

He heard Ronnie Anne laughing, “You looked good as Johnny! The blue bandanna and nail polish worked for you!”

Lincoln only grinned in reply, “It was a lot of fun, I don't think anyone in Royal Woods would have known who I was dressed as, but everyone in your neighborhood thought we looked awesome together.”

He heard Ronnie Anne sigh happily as she was caught up in the memory, “Yeah, maybe nobody at the convention would have recognized me, but that would just mean I was cooler than the rest of them for being more obscure.”

Lincoln laughed softly, “You would be cooler than all of them just by being yourself Ronnie Anne. Most dorks don't also double as Jocks remember?”

Ronnie Anne laughed as well, “Oh come on Lame-O, you know you were always safe with me. Not like Sid is the coolest person in the world, she's just as much of a dork as you are and still my best friend.”

Ronnie and Lincoln both paused after that. Ronnie had slipped into using his pet name. The one she called him when they were best friends. More, the one she called him when they were boyfriend and girlfriend. Lame-o was the name she gave him when she loved him.

Neither one decided to address it at the moment, instead carrying on, despite knowing what had just passed between them.

Lincoln spoke up, “I missed you.”

There was a pause and he heard Ronnie breathing. She responded.

“I missed you too.”

Lincoln looked up at the ceiling, laying back on his bed, “We were young and dumb. But, you're still one of the coolest people I know. I know Lori and Bobby kinda put us both up to this, but I can already tell, I wished I'd talked to you sooner.”

Ronnie's voice had softened considerably, “Yeah Lame-o, I wished you had too. It's kinda sad I had to be the one who called first you know..”

And here Lincoln knew she was angry, despite the softness in her voice, she was raking him over the coals a little. But she was also using that pet name of his again, as if she were consciously deciding to, despite everything else.

Lincoln replied, his voice also soft, “I should have been the one to reach out to you first. Life's been crazy, but that's an excuse. I should of said something to you after a while. We were always friends, and I missed that. I missed that so much Ronnie Anne.”

Ronnie's voice sounded pained when she replied, “I missed it too Lincoln. I missed being able to tell you things, and vent to you, and share things with you. I missed seeing you.”

Lincoln swallowed, he felt so low right now for letting his friendship with the girl on the other line go. Ronnie Anne had really been special to him at one point, she had even been the most important person in the world to him...and he had ignored her entire existence for three years.

It made him feel confused. They were starting to veer into unknown territory. “Well, maybe you'll see me again soon. I missed hanging out with you too. Lori really wants me to come down and visit.”

Ronnie Anne's voice was back to normal, tough, teasing him, “Well you need to Lame-o.” Yet there was his pet name again. “You need to come down and visit your sister and your niece and nephew. No more excuses if we're getting along again right?”

He smiled to himself hearing that, tapping his fingers on his knee, “Yeah, I guess, if we're gonna be friends again, then I really don't have much of an excuse.”

He could hear the smirk in Ronnie Anne's voice, “Yeah you don't have any excuses. But more than that, you need to tell me your screen name. Someone told me you play Firesupport too.”

Lincoln blinked in surprise, already Ronnie was convincing him to come down to Great Lakes City, but more than that, asking for his gamertag so they could clearly play one of his favorite videogames together once more, “You play Firesupport too? Oh let me guess, you main El Murte don't you?”

He could hear Ronnie Anne practically cackling, “You know me too well, don't you Lame-O? Let me guess, you play Old Soldier? With his white hair and gruff personality like you wish you had, am I right?”

Lincoln was flabbergasted that Ronnie had pegged him so well, “Hey, he's a great DPS! He has healing capability too! Besides, I'm mainly support, I go with Robo-Buddha, I only play Old Soldier if we need extra DPS. Clyde tanks.”

Ronnie Anne was having so much fun, “I should of figured you'd be support. That suits you. Clyde tanks huh? Well sounds like the three of us need to team up and play some rounds together.”

Lincoln was just as giddy as she was, “Yeah it does. I bet the three of us could really do some damage together.”

Lincoln and Ronnie Anne would catch up for the next 3 hours. Talking about everything going on in their lives and what they had been up to. It was as if they had never stopped talking. They only hung up because both had classes in the morning and needed to sleep. They exchanged gamertags with the promise of talking again later.

He had gotten so caught up talking to Ronnie Anne, he had completely forgotten about the pictures Lucy had sent him. Or that he had been waiting for everyone else to go to sleep so he could see her.

When he decided to bed down and realized that, he assured himself that it wasn't because he was conflicted. No he had just been overwhelmed by the sudden appearance of his other best friend. Besides, Lucy and he had spent the whole weekend together.

She'd understand.

Wouldn't she?

A/N: Was that a motherfuckin Jojo reference? For those in the know, yes, yes it was.
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The Shadow of his Heart