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The Darker Side of New Thundera	By : Crystalandra Category: +S through Z > Thundercats Views: 7628 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the ThunderCats or any character or events associated with it. I do not own or make any money from the ThunderCats or from this fiction

Chapter List
- 10
- 11
- 12
Lumar crawled to the back of the van leaving Schwenk up front alone to pilot the vehicle through the dark streets. He sat hunched with his fists balled up and pressed to his head unable to believe he had been duped. "Gaston..." the tiger called. "Can you pull over to the side of the road please...I think I am going to be sick."
"No....we cannot stop..." His partner answered, "Shit, Lumar...I BRAGGED about killing the priest....we're so fucked...look what they did to Teegara and she only had information...I assume Cobra didn't make it either!!" he said trembling.
"Schwenk--never mind that! I SLEPT with HER! I FUCKED a SH'IAR WARRIOR!" Lumar gave a dry burp. "Please...Schwenk--you've got to stop...my stomach...I can still smell HER on ME!"
"We stop and we risk getting caught!! You really want that? No--puke in the van!"
The tiger lurched backwards and made loud retching noises...When he was finished, he made his way to the front of the van and sat in the passenger's seat. "I feel fucking awful."
"No shit...well don't worry...We'll feel nothing when we're dead!"
Lumar shivered, "How could we have been so easily fooled?! I was told the Sh'iar women were ugly monstrous beasts that could turn a man to stone by just looking at them! Schwenk...she was beautiful...s-she tricked us! Why didn't she kill us when she had the chance?!"
"I have no....Wait...she was asking me about ThunderCats...Why the hell would she do that?" he asked frantically. "Oh by the Gods....she was getting information from us....but why???"
"I don't know...she was asking me questions too about the ThunderCats...Actually she was asking if maybe you were working for them...that perhaps you killed the priest under their orders or something...Why would she ask that?"
"Fucked if I know!! Lumar...Where the hell are we going to go?"
"I don't know..." the tiger replied miserably. "We've got to hide...go underground or something." Lumar was pawing nervously at the dashboard when the glove compartment suddenly sprang open. He took out the paraphernalia of papers that came tumbling out and showed them to Schwenk. "What are all these? Do you think Cobra left them for us?"
"I can't read Cat....what do they say?"
The tiger sighed as he shuffled through the documents. "Well...one envelope is stuffed with money...wow, there is over $50,000 Thunderian dollars in here along with credit cards...Hmmm and this..." Lumar fell silent.
"Yes? What the hell is it??" he asked impatiently.
"Okay Schwenk...there's a CD that simply says, 'Play me'...Hey there are false documents here with our pictures..."
"OK, well play the CD, dummy..." Schwenk growled, "Fucks sake!" he muttered.
Lumar glanced around the small van compartment then finally noticed the CD player in the console above the radio; he pushed the disc into the slot and it immediately began to play--it was Cobra's voice: "If you are playing the CD I have left for you in the van that probably means I'm dead..."
“Do you think he is dead?" the big cat asked Schwenk; his green eyes were large and luminous in the dark.
"Of course he's dead!" Schwenk rolled his eyes over the stupidity of the question.
The Beni quieted; the CD played on: "Since you two have fucked up royally by pissing off the Sh'iar, the only people who MIGHT be able to protect your asses and I do stress MIGHT would be the ThunderCats. Goddammit...I don't know why you had to mess with the Sh'iars...Anyway, I have left you money, credit cards, a change of clothing, and forged documents...These goodies are just in case the ThunderCats run your sorry asses...Then again I wouldn't blame them..."
"...You know...I'm starting to be glad he's dead! Pompous fuckwit! ThunderCats.....riiiiiiight....he thinks we're going to run to those bastards? We'll be locked up forever...that'll be fine for you, it'll be a cat camp....it'll be a disaster for me...I'll be a cat’s dinner!!" he shook his head. "I say we take the money and drink ourselves out of existence!"
"Where would be go? Nobody would want to help us...we're sitting targets!"
"Out of the city...into the endless forests?"
Lumar grabbed his tail and was busy pulling and twisting it. "I'm not keen on the idea of relocating to the forests...we would be too vulnerable out in the open." The CD hissed; apparently there was more. "Okay..." Cobra's voice continued. "Sorry about that delay there I thought I was being followed by those fuckers...false alarm. As I was saying you could go to the ThunderCats but I was thinking they would probably deliver you, themselves, right to the Sh'iars’ doorstep...There is someone...yes, someone who would help...Problem is monkey she HATES humans with a passion..."
"I see a theme developing....and it's another 'she'...Lumar, who ever it is you are NOT shagging her!"
The tiger went an interesting shade of scarlet. "I think I've learnt my lesson...I’m swearing off women!"
"Smart move..." he nodded, "Shhh....Cobra is talking again..."
"...So Schwenk you are going to have to be on your BEST and I mean BEST behaviour if you hope to get any sort of cooperation from this gal...She is BAD news! Now as for you Lumar, you will have to charm her at ANY COST. Listen carefully monkey--I'll give you the directions to get to her place..."
Schwenk listened intently and rolled his eyes. The directions were to a rough part of town--somewhere where he wouldn't normally have gone. "He'd better be right about this or I'm monkey on toast!"
"What did he mean by that I will 'have to charm her at any cost'?" Lumar asked worriedly. "Please don't tell me that I will have to sleep with her! Gods no!"
"Oh no..." he replied sarcastically. "...and you do so struggle with womanizing!!"
The big cat scowled, "I don't know what you're talking about...It's your fault that I wound up in that Sh'iar's bed!"
"Oh really...I don't remember grabbing you by the dick and forcing you into her arms!!" he snorted.
"You had to go and tell her that I was GAY of all things!"
He chuckled. "Well....it was quite funny!"
"To me it wasn't...your goad forced me into her bed."
"Oh pleeeeeeease!!! You are fucking kidding me..." he exclaimed. "Grow up...you make your own damn decisions..."
"I would if you didn't stick your nose in my business!" The tiger harped. "What a mess we're in!"
"Oh....and that's down to me, right??"
"It was YOUR bright idea to kill the priest for his gold...and speaking of gold, you left it back at the house."
"Yeah....and it was YOU who insisted she come to the safe house!!" he snapped back with equal ire.
Lumar's ears flattened against his skull. "How was I supposed to know she was a Sh'iar?! Her frightened act fooled me! I admit, it was my fault...but I didn't kill the priest!" The tiger slumped back in his seat.
"Well, what's done is done and in their eyes we're both equally as guilty!"
"They'll kill us...but we're safe at the moment, aren't we? There's no way they will be able to track us down."
"How could they??" he looked at Lumar.
"You're right, Schwenk...how could they...I just wanted to make sure." The CD made another hissing sound; it seemed that it had not finished playing. The cougar spoke, "Gods, I've got to be crazy doing this but Cheebie begged me to help...Anyway, I've given you the address--your contact is a panther...she is a mean cuss of a woman so watch your balls’ boys! Pandora is her name and I emphasize she is a BAD CAT. When you get to her place, Schwenk, have Lumar go to her door and present her with this CD...got it? Good luck!" The disc popped out of the slot.
"Pandora? What a sissy name..." he snorted. "What is it with me and girly cats? I'm not that bad, right??"
Lumar glanced at the human. "You are bad...in fact terrible."
"What? Nooooo.....stop kidding around..."
The tiger rolled his eyes. "Are we nearly there?" He scratched absently at his furry arms. "I need to shower...to remove her scent...I am disgusted with myself for...sleeping with...HER!"
"Sure...next block..." Schwenk pulled the van over, switched the ignition off, and got out. "Right...get the CD and you lead on, OK?"
Lumar reluctantly grabbed the CD from the slot. "Where are you going to be?" He asked slowly climbing out.
"Standing behind you for protection....this Pandora sounds unpredictable....a hard-arse diesel..."
The pair stood in front of the building--it was another run down motel with a few drunken cats scattered around the steps; one glanced up and fixed Schwenk with a stare. "Are you food?" the drunk slurred.
"Yeah!! Bite my arse!!" Schwenk snorted in response.
His friend licked his chops slowly rising. "Hey boys, looks like we'll be dining tonight!"
Lumar gave a low warning snarl and quickly ushered the human up the stairs. "What's her apartment number?"
"It's...oh great....13!!" he sighed.
"That's a very unlucky number Schwenk...I'm having misgivings about this."
"Yeah....I hear the Sh’iars are covered in lucky numbers!" he snorted.
Lumar shook his head and quickly scanned the doors for 13; finding it, he stood before it hesitating. "Should I knock?" he asked.
"Unless you intend to post us through the letterbox..." Schwenk sarcastically retorted.
The tiger raised his big fist to knock at the door; it wasn't necessary--the door swung open and Lumar found himself staring down the double barrel of a gun. "What the FUCK do you want stripy? You have 2 seconds to speak or I blow your head off your shoulders." The she-cat growled.
"Give her the CD..." Schwenk kicked Lumar's ankle.
"U-uh h-here..." he stammered surrending the disc; the Black Panther’s eyes never waivered from the tiger. "What does it say?" She asked and pulled back on the safety.
"Cobra sent us here...it's all on the CD..." he stammered.
"Did I ask you any of that?" She snarled. "What is written on the CD? One more wrong answer and I'm spraying your fucking brains all over the hallway."
"I...I...don't know..." he handed it over frightened.
She rolled her dark brown eyes. "Gods and goddess you are a stupid moron!" The panther seized the CD from Lumar and held it up in front of him. "You were supposed to read this to me...where it says, 'Play me'! Fuck...can't you read numb nuts?! Cobra told me you were slow--you're Lumar, right?"
"Y-yes....Lumar, ma'am..."
"Don't call me ma'am--for God's sakes I am not old." She pushed the tiger aside and squinted down at the human. "What the fuck did you bring your dinner here for?"
"Hello...you must be Pandora....cute name..." Schwenk winked charmingly up at her.
"Your dinner speaks?" The panther's nose was busy twitching taking in Schwenk's scent. "Cobra didn't mention it...kill him and I'll place him in the fridge for safekeeping."
"Oh, please....the act is tired and dull...we're here to hide out..."
Pandora glared at Schwenk. "Who said I was joking monkey." She raised her rifle pointing it at the human's chest.
"A cat, with a gun....what's wrong, blunt teeth??"
"Pandora...please..." Lumar begged stepping around and positioning himself in front of Schwenk hoping to diffuse the growing tension. "Cobra said that you would help us...we're running from the Sh'iar."
The panther raised her eyebrow and lowered her gun. "Is that right? Running from the Sh'iar, huh?" She sniffed the tiger, "Smells like you rolled in one."
"He's rather active in the groinal area..." Schwenk added from behind the tiger's butt.
Lumar reached behind him swatting the human; Pandora threw her head back and laughed. "Well...maybe I'll have to test that for myself...Move your arses come inside...you'll be relatively safe here...The Sh'iar would never degrade themselves by setting foot in this part of town."
"I wouldn't be so sure....they're apparently very interested in us...even in this shit part of town..."
"You'll have to tell me what you've done to arouse their interest." Pandora replied moving out of the doorway allowing Schwenk and Lumar into the apartment. She bolted the door and turned, hands on hips to survey her visitors. She was a huge cat--tall and statuesque--nearly as big as Lumar himself. The panther was dressed in skin tight black leather which matched her black velvet fur; her brown eyes showed she was dangerous.
"That would be dangerous...the less you know the better!" Schwenk replied, looking around as he walked through.
Lumar took a seat on the couch agreeing; Pandora felt differently. "If I am going to allow you to remain here, you'll have to fess up. Do I appear as though I am helpless? Let me fill you in on some information about myself WHY Cobra felt I could help. I am familiar with the Sh'iar...I know them inside and out..."
"Oh? How is that...you a follower of the Goddess as well..." he snorted with derisive laughter.
"It's nothing to laugh about, monkey face...you should learn to show respect; my mother was a Sh'iar and I have inherited all of their bad habits...so watch yourself around me."
"You sure smell like Sh’iar!" he snorted. "So what was your mother....Cleric? Seeker? Or Warrior?"
Pandora pounced seizing the small human and raised him high in the air as if he were a feather; she pressed his face to hers. "My mother was a disgraced Sh'iar warrior, thrown out of the order because she mated with a ThunderCat. Do you have anything else that you want to say smart mouth?!"
"Erm...erm....no..." he squeaked. "Please....put me down..."
She extended a long claw and scraped it lovingly against Schwenk's jaw line drawing a faint trail of blood. "Say pretty please..."
"P-P-Pretty please..." he gritted his teeth.
Schwenk was dropped unceremoniously to the ground. "You--tiger, come here." Pandora ordered.
Lumar got up from the couch and reluctantly walked over to where Pandora stood impatiently tapping her foot. "You're a big brute for a Bengalian tiger--who were your parents?"
"Well....erm....I don't like to talk about those days..." he went sullen.
"Difficult times..." Schwenk added in agreement.
She tilted her head. "Is that so? Do you think I had an easy go of it being the half-breeded bastard of a Sh'iar?" The panther tapped the side of her nose. "I ask because your breeding is quite unusual for a Beni...very strange indeed. I'll let it go for now...from your scent, you were with a Sh'iar...were you alone with her?"
"Damn right he was..." Schwenk snorted "Would you like to know about my parents?"
"Your parents were monkeys what more do I need to know?" She scoffed. "If you were alone with the Sh'iar, chances are she has marked you...embedded you with a homing device to keep track of your whereabouts. Don't look so shocked--that's something I would have done myself."
"Take a rummage up his arse!" Schwenk laughed.
"Naw...that's too obvious a place to hide the device...more likely it's wedged up in his dick." Pandora snickered; Lumar's mouth dropped open in shock.
"Really? Is the tracking device really that small??" Schwenk tittered teasingly.
"Schwenk--it's not funny!" The big tiger whined, "How do I get the device out?!"
"Ask Pandora...she looks the sort to suck it out!"
The panther growled. "I'd watch that mouth of yours if I were you meat sack! Well tiger sorry to say this, but you'll have to live with it...not unless you want your equipment hacked off."
"Is there any way of knowing if or where the tracker chip is??" Schwenk asked.
Pandora now laughed. "Sorry Lumar I was just messing with you...the chip is no doubt in your bloodstream...did she bite you?"
"Erm....yeah, yes she nipped at my neck shoulders..." Lumar replied.
"Oh that's just swell..." Schwenk criticized, "Can't keep your fucking pants on for two minutes! Thanks to you she can follow us anywhere!"
"Don't blame him monkey...Sh'iar women are bred to be beautiful in order to seduce their prey...that's what makes them dangerous..." She grinned. "At least I have that to thank my mama for...Anyway there isn't much I can do to get that bug out of you...I can easily mask the signal."
"So you ended up too ugly for Sh’iar life, or what?" Schwenk had a knack of saying ill-considered thoughts.
Pandora gave a low growl and pounced knocking the human to the ground; she slipped a knife out of her back pocket and had it hovering over Schwenk's right ear. "I've always wanted to snack on a human...now I will get my chance."
"Look....you misunderstood..." he lied. "I meant to ask why you were not in the Sh’iars....please...I probably taste bad anyway..." he blurted out. He was stunned by just how heavy she was, not far off Lumar, which for a female was nothing short of astounding.
"You know Schwenk the problem with you is that you don't THINK before you speak...Didn't Cobra warn you about me?" She growled softly while Lumar looked nervously on watching the situation.
“Well....I think he maybe mentioned something, but to be honest it all sounded rather prejudiced and unfair...I don't think you're as bad as he says, I think inside there is a sweet tender flower waiting to blossom...."
Pandora gazed intently into Schwenk's face, "Lumar--go find something to occupy your time."
Schwenk paled somewhat. "Erm...why does he need to leave....I....didn't mean to offend..." For his part, Lumar stood and looked unsure as to what to do.
"Oh you sweet talking man..." The panther cooed. "Why do you think? I want to get to KNOW you better...obviously you are coming on to me..."
"I'll leave you two lovebirds alone, have fun Schwenk...and think on the next time you tease me..." he waved his fingers and left the room. Schwenk looked at the departing tiger then straight back into the black eyes of Pandora. "Please, Pandora...don't misunderstand me...I never meant offence..." he gulped.
"Have I really?" She asked softly her fingers trailing down to his zipper. "Oh you are such a tease Schwenk..."
"I never pre-judged you...I'm sure you're nothing like the monster that Cobra painted you as...."
Pandora gave a loud raucous laugh. "Listen to me and listen to me well monkey--I am TEN times worse than how Cobra described me." She pressed her knife tip against Schwenk's penis. "You open your mouth and say something nasty to me--you can say good bye to your fucking dick! I'll castrate you so fast you'll be singing soprano--DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!"
He nodded vigorously; this was a real scary bitch.
"Now that our little misunderstanding has been straightened out, would you like some coffee?" She asked sweetly getting up. "Oh Lumar, you can come back...we're finished."
"Coffee? Yes....p-please..." Schwenk felt like he needed to stay on the floor a few more minutes to compose himself.
Pandora clapped her hands. "Wonderful...I also have some fresh mincemeat pies..."
She's a fucking psychopath! Schwenk thought. "Mince p-pies...wonderful" is what he actually said to her.
The panther winked and sauntered into the kitchen just as Lumar entered the living room; he gave Schwenk a curious glance seeing how pale the human was. "Well Romeo, did you have fun? How did you enjoy it?"
"Bite me!" he shouted very softly to Lumar, fearful that Pandora would hear him. He scowled at the tiger. "You left me...She could've eaten me! Those teeth aren't meant for vegetables!"
"What did you expect me to do? She wanted you Schwenk, not me and I wasn't about to piss her off."
"Hmff!!" he grumbled as he slowly sat up. "She's psycho!!" he whispered.
"Well I guess she's that way because she is part Sh'iar...aren't they all crazy?
"Don't know...tell you what..." Schwenk jabbed his finger squarely in Lumar's chest "Why don't you ask her??" he frowned.
The tiger shook his head. "No way...I'm not going to ask her anything...she might bite my head off!"
"Here's hoping!" he snorted. "She is scary...not sure if she's going to eat me or mate with me, although I suspect the end result would be the same in both eventualities!"
Pandora called to the men from the kitchen. "Come and get it...I've got food and coffee!"
The human jerked his head, indicating the brave tiger could go first.
Lumar gulped but made his way nevertheless into the kitchen where he took a seat at the table; Schwenk also sat opposite. Pandora brought over the coffee and then set two large pies dripping in blood and entrails in front the two. "Bon appétit!" She announced stepping back.
"What the hell is that...?" Schwenk pointed at the road kill.
"That's my fresh mince meat pie...what the fuck did you think it was?" She asked drinking her coffee; Lumar was digging into his food eating noisily.
"I won't eat that....sorry....Humans don't eat....well....raw food..."
"Is that so? Well would you like me to heat it up for you?" Pandora raised her eyebrow.
"Well....erm....cook it through.....yes please..." he offered a grateful smile.
The panther put down her cup. "Do you think I am the merry little homemaker or what?" She snarled. "I'll go out and get you something...what do you want to eat?"
"Well, anything....human...ish...Don't go to any trouble..."
Her brown eyes darkened. "Don't worry meat sack--I won't go to any trouble at all...There aren't many places around here that cater to humans...I'll get you some vegetarian shit I saw selling at the end of the street." The cat flew out of the apartment in a rage slamming the door.
- 10
- 11
- 12
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The Darker Side of New Thundera