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Aventure Amoureuse	By : Baron Category: +M through R > Miraculous LadyBug Views: 5012 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction for adults. Miraculous Ladybug and its characters are not mine, and are the property of ZAG-inc. I make no profit from this and all characters are 18+.

Chapter List
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You continue walking towards the source of the smoke as panicked Parisians run past you in the opposite direction. You hear distant police sirens and people screaming as you get closer. You're mid-step when a black staff lands in front of you stopping you in your tracks. The staff retracts and Chat Noir descends from somewhere above you. "You have to get out of here, now!" the cat boy explains to you in an urgent tone. "Ha! Just the cat I wanted to see!" you tell him smiling uncontrollably. "I'm serious. It's too dangerous here. You're going to get hurt." Chat Noir continues. "Relax, I can handle myself." you say boastfully. "Like yesterday?" he replies narrowing his eyes at you. "That was a fluke. I've beaten up people way bigger than that sculptor." you continue. "Look, that's great and all, but you're in danger. You should leave this sort of thing to the professionals." he tells you. "Whatever that villain is up to is none of my concern. It's not my business." you explain. "Good, that's what I've been trying to tell you." Chat says impatiently. "I need to talk to you and Ladybug." you tell him. "I'm sure it can wait. We can meet up with you later." Chat declares. "I'm gonna hold you to that, Chat." you say wagging your finger at him. "Fine. Whatever. Just get out of here before you get hurt." Chat says impatiently turning around when he hears an explosion coming from down the street. "I gotta go! You should do the same. Go find somewhere safe to hide!" he says sternly bouncing toward the smoke on his staff. "They might appreciate me more if I go help them." you think to yourself as you follow Chat Noir towards the source of the smoke.
You dart down an alley to get closer to the action and to avoid being seen. As you make it near the end of the alleyway, you see a police car bounce across your field of view at a 45° angle as it's broken siren wailed pitifully. "Whoa!" you think to yourself as you tread a little more cautiously. You look around and see some toys some children must have abandoned as they ran. There was a jump rope, a softball, and an aluminum baseball bat. You bend down to collect them and run to the end of the alley keeping your back against the wall and peeking your head around the corner. You see a girl in a purple dress and pigtails floating in midair holding an umbrella blowing cars and people down the street with strong gusts of wind. "This is Stormy Weather! The greatest weather girl in all of Paris! I'm sensing a cold front to the south..." the floating girl proclaims as she shoots a beam of ice from her umbrella in a southern direction. "...and a heatwave to the north!" she continues blasting fire in a northern direction. "You all know what happens when a cold front and a warm front meet, don't you?" Stormy says. "There's going to be a storm!" Stormy cackles as lightning strikes the ground beneath her and hail the size of beer cans falls from the sky obliterating anything unlucky enough to be underneath it. "Holy shit." you say quietly. "One of the Planeteers is PISSED!" you chuckle quietly. You hold the softball in your hand attempting to get your trajectory right as you only have one shot at this. You spit on the ball for luck. At least that's what you tell yourself. You have no idea why baseball players spit on the ball before throwing it. You shrug and whip the ball upwards as hard as you can. It impacts Stormy's forehead perfectly. "YES! Got that bitch!" you cheer prematurely thinking you've stopped her. She shakes the cobwebs out of her head mostly unphased. "Who threw that?!" Stormy bellows. "You quickly duck back into the alley to avoid being seen. It's not a moment too soon as Ladybug and Chat Noir arrive and take turns fistfighting Stormy. "She's distracted." you think to yourself peering around the corner once again. The softball is too far away to try to throw it again, but you still have a baseball bat and a jump rope.
You devise a plan. All Ladybug and Chat Noir have to do is get Stormy on the ground. You can't reach her with the bat unless you throw it, and you already tried throwing things once. Ladybug grabs Stormy's foot with her yo-yo swinging her into the ground forming an impact crater. "This is my chance!" you say excitedly as you quietly creep up to the crater bat in both hands. Stormy stands back up on her feet shouting at Ladybug. "Is that the best you can do? Your superpowers are no match for the power of mother nature!" she shouts at the heroes angrily. While she's distracted, you strike. You swing the bat full force slamming it into Stormy's lower spine. The impact brings her to her knees as she falls forward bracing herself on her hands. You swing again hitting her in the right side of her ribcage knocking her onto her back. You stand above her straddling her body and raising the bat above your head. The next strike will hit her in the face. "What did I just tell you?" you hear a voice shout from the roof of a building. You look up to see a very pissed-off Chat Noir. "Relax, I came to help so we can talk!" you shout up at the angry cat boy letting your guard down and looking away from Stormy. "Another wannabe hero?" a voice below you says. You look down to see Stormy on her back pointing her umbrella directly at you. "Let it snow!" she shouts blasting you with a beam of ice freezing you and launching you into the air high above the Paris skyline. "Oh... shit!" you think as you're too frozen to move or react. Ladybug catches your foot with her yo-yo pulling you down to a streetlight. The string of the yo-yo wraps around the pole keeping you a short distance from the ground. You feel an impact to the ice block shattering it and unfreeing you. "Do you understand now why I told you to run?" Chat Noir says resting his staff on his shoulder. You attempt to answer him, but you're covered in frost and are too cold to move. You collapse in a heap as Ladybug retracts her yo-yo.
After some time you manage to thaw out enough to get back to your feet. You look around for the bat, but it's long gone. All you have left for a weapon is a child's jump rope. "Maybe I can talk her into playing double dutch." you mutter to yourself sarcastically. Down the street you see the two heroes battling Stormy. You attempt another quick plan. It's not a good one, but it's all you got. As Ladybug and Chat Noir fight with Stormy, you enter a nearby building and climb the stairs. "Fuck. I really gotta stop smoking cigarettes!" you say aloud as you run up multiple flights. You kick the rooftop door open and run across the roof. Below you Stormy hovers shooting fire and ice at Ladybug and Chat Noir. "Oh, god. What the fuck am I doing?" you say as you dive off the roof with the jump rope wrapped around your hands as makeshift garrote wire. You land on Stormy's back as the jump rope wraps around her neck. The villain yelps in surprise as she thrashes around. Ladybug and Chat Noir watch the spectacle with widened eyes. You've either earned their respect at last, or lost them as friends forever. Only time will tell you suppose. "You again?" Stormy says in between gasps for air. "Going up!" she says pointing her umbrella at the ground and launching you both into the stratosphere. "What are you doing, you crazy bitch?!" you scream as you watch Paris shrink into a tiny speck. "If I die, I'm taking you with me!" Stormy hisses.You look around below you and get a lovely view of Europe from space. "Damn. I'd take a photo if I wasn't so busy choking you." you quip sarcastically. "You want a better view? Here, have a closer look!" Stormy says doing a front roll throwing you off her back. You scream as you plummet back to Earth wondering if you're high enough to burn up on re-entry. "Well, I honestly didn't think I'd die like this." you say in a normal speaking tone not caring if anyone hears you. "I would have guessed throat cancer or cirrhosis of the liver. Being liquefied upon an impact from space admittedly wasn't how I thought I'd go." you say to yourself. "I should have written a will, I had time." you say as you watch the countries below you get larger and larger until you begin to see streets, buildings, and cars. "Well, at least it'll be over quick. Probably just a loud splat and then darkness. At least I won't suffer anymore." you continue as you see a very tiny Eiffel tower below you getting larger and larger. You close your eyes and brace for impact. You hope people enjoyed reading about your adventure. If they didn't there's not much you can do about it now. To put it bluntly: You're fucked.
You feel the wind on your face and wait for the impact. You hope it's not too painful and is over quickly. Strangely, the impact isn't so bad. Almost painless. It also came from the side instead of beneath you. "You can open your eyes now." a young male says. You cautiously open one eye expecting to see an agel or at the very least a demon. You open your eyes to an amazing view of Paris as Chat Noir clutches you safely in his arms. "I think this makes two you owe me now, but I wasn't really keeping score." he says with a smile. "I thought you were mad at me?" you ask the cat boy using this as an excuse to hold onto him tightly. You were thankful he rescued you again, but you didn't want to let him go. "I am a little ticked at you, but I'm not going to let you die. What kind of hero would I be?" he says mildly annoyed at your antics. You hold him tightly snuggling close to him as he bounces across Paris. You inhale deeply through your nose curious as to what he smells like. "Is that cheese I smell?" you ask confusedly. "Uh... no." he replies refusing to look you in the eye. "Yes it is!" you say as you drink in another deep whiff. "That's stinky foot cheese! What is that, Limburger?" you ask trying to identify the horrid smell. "Camembert." he begins to reply. "Er... I mean it's not cheese!" he shouts defensively. "Dude, I know what I smell." you tell him. "You want me to drop you? Because I might if you keep it up." he says looking at you with piercing green eyes. "Alright, fine. It's not cheese, but you gotta change your socks." you say jokingly as he drops you several feet before catching you again. "Alright! Point taken! Put me down!" you scream holding him tightly.
- 9
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- 11
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Aventure Amoureuse