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Ms. Frizzle's Class Explores the Human Body	By : Meowshi Category: -Misc Cartoons > General Views: 2642 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I am not in any way affiliated with the series, The Magic School Bus (1994). The following is a non-commissioned work created for entertainment purposes only.

Chapter List
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It was another perfectly ordinary day at Walkerville Elementary, and as much as it may surprise you to hear, that included Ms. Frizzle’s fourth-grade class as well. The magic school bus was out of commission due to, in her own words, “a cracked central discombobulator and a thrice-fried warpstone”, and so her students hadn’t been taken on a kooky, dangerous, educational adventure in weeks! Instead, they had been copying perfectly ordinary lessons written on the perfectly ordinary whiteboard while sitting at their perfectly ordinary classroom desks. Ms. Frizzle, whose unusual dresses often mirrored the crazy field trips she planned for her students, had even started to show up to class in perfectly ordinary dresses.
Yes, it seemed like fantastical adventures were a thing of the past for Ms. Frizzle’s fourth-grade class. Even Liz, the class’s inexplicably intelligent pet chameleon, had spent most of the past week sleeping through uninspired lessons on cell division, osmosis, and the circulatory system.
“Good morning, class!” beamed Ms. Frizzle as she strode into the classroom, once again wearing a simple navy blue dress with no decorations.
“Good morning Ms. Frizzle,” the class repeated unenthusiastically, preparing for another unadventurous, boring day of school. “Oh, why so gloomy class?” she grinned at her miserable-looking students, never seeming to lose her bubbly, outgoing personality.
“Yeah guys, what’s so bad about this?” Arnold piped in, “Another day of not being shrunken, or shot into space, or sent back in time to load muskets for the Union in the Civil War, or…”
“Oh don’t be silly, Arnold. I sent my fourth-grade class back in time to fight in the Civil War last year, and we fought on the side of the Confederacy!” Ms. Fizzle giggled joyously before turning back to her lesson plan.
Tim and Keesha, the only two black kids in the class, shot each other a concerned look at this comment.
“It’s just,” mumbled Wanda Li, who was leaning her chin into her palm in the classic ‘bored student’ pose, “these lessons have been kind of bland Ms. Frizzle.”
“Ah, so you’re all craving a more hands-on approach to today’s lesson hmm?” Ms. Frizzle grinned with that mischievous twinkle in her eyes that the class has learned to recognize as a sign of trouble.
“Oh no, I knew I should have stayed home today…,” Arnold moaned from the back of the room.
With a snap of her fingers and a spin, Ms. Frizzle’s perfectly ordinary dress flew into the air with a flourish and suddenly she stood before her class in a white, form-fitting bodysuit that had illustrations of all the body's vital organs and muscle groups printed on it.
“Just because we don’t have access to the bus right now doesn’t mean we can’t have an adventure! We have one of the most interesting and mysterious places on earth to explore right here in this very classroom! The human body!” Her earrings glowed eerily as she announced this new lesson.
A stunned silence descended over the room. The girls were simply surprised at another flagrant display of Ms. Frizzle’s almost-supernatural ability to change clothing at the drop of a dime.
“How does she do that?” Keesha whispered to Dorothy Ann under her breath. Arnold turned green and clamped his hand over his mouth, remembering when the Magic School Bus had taken a trip inside of his own body.
The other boys in the classroom were shocked for an entirely different reason. While they had grown accustomed to Ms. Frizzle’s strange, elaborate dresses; the bodysuit she was wearing now was something else entirely. Did she not realize how revealing it was?
The body-hugging garment didn’t simply accentuate her physique, it clung to every contour and crevice of her body. A pair of heavy breasts that had up until this point been hidden behind school-appropriate attire was staring back at the boys, as well as a pair of massive nipples that seemed to have the rigidity and shape of the erasers at the end of their No. 2 pencils. Every dip or crease on her abdomen was visible through the thin fabric of the body suit, even her belly button was prominently showing! Their teacher’s lower half was obscured by what appeared to be a frizzy bush as unkempt and unmanageable as the mop of red hair on her head, but the fact that the bush was so visible in the first place left the male students dumbfounded and uncomfortably shifting in their seats. They were suddenly thinking about their teacher in a way they never had before.
Phoebe noticed that Ralphie was openly drooling onto his desk and quickly looked around for something to distract herself. “Hey, what’s the board say?” she said a little louder than was necessary, shaking the boy’s out of their befuddlement. Somehow without grabbing a marker or other writing utensil, the words “Today’s Lesson: Human Anatomy and Sexual Education” appeared on the whiteboard. Wanda’s eyes narrowed skeptically, and she wondered, not for the first time, if Ms. Frizzle was some sort of witch.
Another hush fell over the classroom as they read the whiteboard. After a few seconds, Dorothy Ann broke the silence by flipping through the school manual which she had inexplicably produced out of nowhere, “According to my research, we aren’t supposed to discuss topics related to personal matters like sex. Even for educational purposes!”
“At my old school, we didn’t have sexual education…” Phoebe muttered in amazement.
“We don’t have sexual education at this school,” Tim corrected her even though he hadn’t taken his eyes off of Ms. Frizzle’s new outfit, “We aren’t supposed to have Sex Ed. until high school!”
“There is no age requirement for science! No grade limit to knowledge!” Ms. Frizzle scoffed, “Would you believe that Principal Ruhle once scolded me when I told him that I took you all on a field trip to Mars? He said you weren’t old enough to go to space, that you’re not even allowed to leave the district without a parental slip! How preposterous!”
“Well, I can believe that,” Arnold said sullenly to himself. It was slowly dawning on him that his days in a perfectly ordinary classroom were quickly coming to an end.
The students began murmuring amongst themselves, wondering what this new lesson would entail. A familiar sense of excitement and wonder that had all but died over the past few weeks seemed to be reborn in the classroom. Normally for a lesson about the human body, they would expect to be shrunken in the Magic School Bus and taken along someone’s bloodstream while Ms. Frizzle explained what they were seeing, but the bus wasn’t working, so what could she possibly have planned? The atmosphere in the classroom was so boisterous that it even managed to stir the classroom chameleon from its sleep, and Liz’s reptilian eyes bugged when they landed on Ms. Frizzle for the first time. Why a cold-blooded lizard would have any interest in a human woman’s anatomy is a question best left for another time.
The commotion in the classroom also served to cover up the gasp from inside the storage closet at the very back of the room. Janet Perlstein, Arnold’s precocious older cousin, slapped a hand over her mouth and hoped that no one had heard her. Unbeknownst to anyone else in the classroom, she had been hiding in the closet and filming the class with a handheld camera. The jealous twelve-year-old had gotten tired of Arnold bragging about all the crazy adventurers the Walkerville fourth grade class went on, and she had decided to film a few of them and show them to the principal in order to hopefully get Ms. Frizzle fired. Unfortunately, the classes had been mostly boring up until this moment, and she had almost been convinced that Arnold was simply lying about all the insane things the class got up to. But Sexual Education? That was definitely against the rules! If she filmed this, Ms. Frizzle would be canned for sure!
“Settle down class, it’s time to begin the lesson!” Ms. Frizzle spun around with another flourish and walked up to her desk, treating the boys in the classroom with a view of her butt that was so explicit through the thin fabric of her bodysuit that she might as well have been wearing nothing at all. She turned her attention to the flushing face of Ralphie, who up until that moment had been gawking at her unabashedly.
She chuckled to herself and absent-mindedly traced around one of her nipples that was protruding from beneath her bodysuit, “I see you’re enjoying the visual aid I’ve brought to class, but I think it’s time for a tactile learning experience. Don’t you agree, Ralphie? Would you mind getting up and grabbing the mannequins from the storage closet?”
A look of panic swept over Ralphie’s face as he looked down beneath his desk at his groin and then muttered something about not being able to get up right now. “How strange,” Ms. Frizzle said while tapping her chin playfully.
“I’ll get them!” Dorothy Ann raised her hand and got up before Ms. Frizzle could respond.
“I’ll get them!” Carlos repeated with contempt, impersonating Dorothy Ann’s obsequious tone. Several of the boys snickered, resulting in the girls shooting nasty glares at them.
Dorothy Ann walked up to the storage closet and opened it, not quite knowing what to expect when Ms. Frizzle said to retrieve “the mannequins”, but sure that it would be something unbelievable! To her and everyone else’s surprise, eight full-sized mannequins suddenly fell into a pile at her feet.
Janet Perlstein, who was currently hiding in the back of that very same storage closet, bit her lip in bewilderment. She hadn’t seen those mannequins earlier. How could she have possibly missed them, they were each the size of an adult man!? She frowned and trained her camera back on the class. Something weird was going on with Ms. Frizzle and how reality seemed to work in this class. And she was going to find out what!
Dorothy Ann dragged the surprisingly light mannequins to the front of the class with a blush emerging on her face. Her embarrassment was caused by a unique feature of the mannequins that she had never encountered before. While they looked like standard clothing mannequins, complete with blank faces and stiff limbs, they were made out of some sort of rubbery material that felt and looked just like skin. But the strangest thing about them was that they didn’t have a bare void at their crotch as you would expect. Instead, each mannequin was sporting a massive (at least from the perspectives of the ten and eleven-year-olds of Ms. Frizzle’s class) rubbery erection. From inside the storage closet, Janet zoomed in on one of the erect mannequins as a flush swept over her cheeks.
Ms. Frizzle handed a mannequin to each student alongside a wrapped condom and then began writing on the whiteboard a breakdown of what sexual prophylactics were and how one was expected to use them.
“Don’t sexual education classes usually use bananas for this kind of … demonstration?” Keesha wondered aloud as she stared wide-eyed at the rubbery erection in front of her. Though she wouldn’t know it, the anatomically-correct mannequins were extremely realistic, and the popping veins on the thick shaft made her think of some sort of cephalopodic monster from the unexplored depths of the ocean. If her dark brown skin could blush, it would be now.
“Nonsense, bananas don’t look very much like erect penises!” Ms. Frizzle giggled as she was showing Phoebe how to open a condom package with her teeth.
“Unless you’re fantasizing about Bart Simpson!” Carlos flashed his biggest shit-eating grin at Keesha.
“CARLOS!!” the class shouted in frustration.

_________

Dorothy Ann was incredibly nervous as she struggled to place a condom on her mannequin. She was normally the best student in class, but as she looked around, she began to suspect that she was falling behind on this particular lesson. The large erect phallus of the mannequin intimidated her beyond words, and she couldn’t imagine adult men walking around with that thing bouncing around all day. She wondered if they push it back up inside them like she once read about invertebrates.
The other girls in the class seemed just as hesitant and jittery as she felt, but they had at least managed to complete the condom placement technique. The boys were slower to grasp the lesson, as was usual. It seemed like none of them wanted to handle the penises of the mannequins out of fear that it would make them “gay.” Dorothy couldn’t help but think that they surely must handle their own penises regularly and it didn’t seem to have made any of them gay but chose not to say anything. Finally Tim, being the most mature and worldly among the boys, declared that they were all being silly. After mentioning that he had a cool gay Uncle who rode a motorcycle and worked as a stuntman in big-budget action movies, he diligently began putting the condom on his mannequin to show that he was no longer intimidated by the lesson. Not wanting to be left out of this truly memorable and outrageous lesson, the other boys quickly followed his example.
Dorothy still couldn’t manage it, her nervousness was causing the wobbly artificial erection in her hands to shake dreadfully. Her senses felt oddly heightened in this state of anxiety. She could feel a bead of sweat dripping slowly down her spine, dampening her unmentionables. She could smell the manufactured scent of latex from the condom she was clumsily fidgeting with. Most of all, she could feel the soft, smooth texture of the rubber skin that made up the artificial penis she was grasping, and it felt so real that she almost felt like she should slap the vile thing away and find the nearest adult to complain to. But the nearest adult was Ms. Frizzle, who was grinning down at her like some sort of scantily-clad Cheshire Cat. There was a strange, desirous glint to Ms. Frizzle’s eyes that Dorothy had never seen before, and she couldn’t help but find it unsettling.
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Ms. Frizzle's Class Explores the Human Body