Grow, Adapt, Overcome. | By : DebbieCync Category: +G through L > The Loud House Views: 53056 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 5 |
Disclaimer: I do not own the Loud House or any associated intellectual properties nor am I making any money off of this. |
My first memory was of floating. I didn’t have any desires or thoughts, I simply floated and formed memories for no reason. This state of affairs was actually broken by environmental changes that caused me to alter myself to adapt to. It was all instinctive, I had no real conscious desires, lacking the complexity needed until one day a creature much like myself moved into my presence and brushed against me.
We merged.
There was no battle, no devouring of the weaker creature, those strategies waste energy. Why become less than you are when you can become more?
With surprising regularity new creatures became part of us, as we learned how to sooth others so they wouldn’t fight and become less. Our memories expanded in scope and complexity, developing new strategies and adaptions based on what we learned with each merger until one day…
0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0
Lincoln sighed as he saw Lisa asleep at her desk, her head pillowed on her arms. “You know you were supposed to be in bed hours ago,” Lincoln said as he picked up his younger sister and carried her to bed.
“Summer,” Lisa muttered as Lincoln laid her down and took off her shoes.
“You do better work when you get a full eight hours of sleep,” he reminded her, moving her around to remove her lab coat and shirt.
“Overrated,” she said, lifting up her hips so he could get her pants off.
“Results don’t lie,” he reminded her as he tucked her into bed, placing her glasses on the night stand.
“Interpretation,” she murmured.
He wasn’t sure what she meant by that, but it didn’t really matter. She was in bed and on her way to sleep. He leaned down and kissed her forehead. “Love you.”
“Yes,” Lisa agreed, the corners of her mouth lifting up as the stress lines on her face smoothed out.
Lincoln grinned knowing what she meant before she let out a small snore, already sound asleep. Lisa was even less demonstrative of affection at six than she had been at four, however that didn’t mean she didn’t care, just that she was busy. She’d set him down one day when she was five and explained that she accepted that he loved her, the affection was returned, and she could prove it mathematically in fact. So, when she said ‘yes’, it was simply an efficient way of expressing the mathematical formula that defined their affections.
Lincoln was used to being her assistant so it was easy to- “Ouch!” Lincoln check his finger, but it didn’t appear to be cut or bleeding. Examining the petri dish, he found it wasn’t cracked or chipped so he wasn’t sure what he’d pricked his finger on.
He placed the empty Petri dish in the sterilizer and put everything away. Lisa could rewrite the laws of science in the morning.
Lincoln softly closed the door and headed for his own room. He preferred getting up early to staying up late as it was the only way he’d get to be the first in the bathroom… or for anything else for that matter. Plus, it was amazing how quiet the house was before everyone got up.
Stripping down to his undies he slid into bed. Neither Lynn nor Lucy were there, so he guessed they’d made up. He didn’t know what they fought about half the time, but it usually resulted in one of them sharing his bed so they could avoid the other one.
*BEEP*BEEP*BEEP*
The white-haired teen awoke with a yawn. His dreams had been scattered and confusing and were rapidly fading. He’d gotten some great story ideas from his dreams before, but not this time. It was like he was answering a long series of questions from the family dog who had just learned to speak binary in burst transmission patterns.
“Actually, that sounds kinda cool,” Lincoln said as he turned off his alarm. “A crashed space craft and an alien dog who is actually smarter than Einstein that is nursed back to health by the oblivious hero.”
Grabbing his clothes for the day, he headed for the bathroom.
There were certain tricks you needed to know to get the most out of the upstairs shower. For instance, you needed to let the water run uninterrupted for a minute and a half before the water heater kicked on, and another minute after that for the temperature to stabilize so you could adjust it to what you wanted without it going from hot to cold every ten seconds.
He and Lynn would get up around the same time and leave the shower running so the other one could hop in during the school year for just that reason, but during the summer they didn’t bother as they weren’t in a race to go anywhere.
Of course, since their parents had taken Leni to check out various secondary schools to see which one suited her (with a little help from Lori) there was even more open shower time and hot water available than normal, so really Lincoln didn’t need to go through all this trouble… but it’d taken him years to figure out how to get everything perfect… So why bother changing it?
He glanced at the hole in the floor that lead to his parent’s bathroom which he could use since they weren’t here, but while it did get warm faster, it didn’t have the pressure the Loud children’s’ shower had thanks to Lana’s work on the pipes and Lori and Leni using an entire summer’s pay from working at a golf course to purchase the Benford 2010 Water Pulse Supreme Shower Head.
Stepping under the pulsating water he reminded himself to do something nice for Lori and Leni for deciding not to take the showerhead with them when they moved out. Admittedly Leni looked a bit tearful about it, but she’d agreed.
“Full two minutes, baby!” Lincoln crowed while letting the conditioner soak into his hair the full suggested time without worrying about one of his sisters rushing him.
“Maybe I take my showers a bit too seriously,” Lincoln admitted, “but when you have ten sisters, bathroom time is at a premium!”
While washing his right leg, he noticed the bruises from where he’d crashed his bike and scraped his knee were gone and the scabs, softened by the warm water, peeled off revealing fresh undamaged skin underneath.
“Must not have been as bad as I thought,” he said.
Finishing up his shower, he dried off and examined his chin in the mirror. “No need for a razor yet,” he said with a sigh.
According to his Dad, Loud men had puberty hit them like a Formula One race car while you were in the middle of the crosswalk; suddenly, hard, and completely out of nowhere.
“Girls have it easy,” Lincoln said. He stopped and shook his head. “Ignore that. I have ten sisters and Lucy just started getting her period recently. I know girls have it rough in a different way than guys do, but at least they have an unmistakable sign puberty has arrived.”
He checked his armpits and groin. “Me, I’m stuck looking for new hair and wondering if I’ll get a wet dream anytime soon. I know people talk about random boners and masturbation but let me tell you something… Guys get hardons way before puberty is even an issue and sometimes you just gotta rub one out and as for wet dreams… It’s not exactly cut and dried, pardon the pun.”
He sighed. “Lisa assures me that as I’m thirteen years old, I should already be seeing the signs… but I’m just not seeing them.”
Lincoln finished getting dressed and went downstairs to make breakfast, enjoying the quiet and not having anyone underfoot while he walked. His tastes had been changing lately so his fried egg sandwich just had cheese and mayonnaise on it. He heard a faint beeping noise coming from upstairs as he set out his breakfast on the table and turned the pan on low, dropping another couple of eggs in it before sitting down.
Closing his eyes, he raised the sandwich to his mouth and froze as he heard a puppy like whimper. Opening his eyes, he acted surprised as he saw Lynn in a T-shirt and running shorts, giving him a wide-eyed stare and licking her lips. “How long has it been since acting like a puppy dog has worked on me?” he teased.
“Yesterday at lunch,” Lynn replied with a grin.
“Really?” he asked, surprised.
“I nuzzled your hand and got you to scratch behind my ears and eventually scratch my back where I can’t reach,” Lynn said with a smirk, inching closer to him.
“Yeah, but when’s the last time it got you my breakfast?” he said, pulling the sandwich closer to himself.
“Good point,” Lynn said. “These days if I want to steal your food I have to surprise you… like this!” She yanked up her shirt.
By the time Lincoln had recovered, his hands were empty and she’d already eaten half the sandwich. Not that he cared, they’d been playing this game for a while now. He’d tease, she’d flash, and they’d both score themselves a point. He wasn’t quite sure if it was perverted or not, as they’d seen each other naked plenty of times, like last month when Lana briefly had a pet skunk and they had to share a tomato soup bath for half an hour.
Still, he got a warm feeling in his chest that she would share herself with him like that, as he knew she was a bit insecure about her looks, which made no sense to him as every time he saw her he was pretty sure he could feel his hormones get that much closer to sexual maturity. Oh well, he didn’t need to understand her to love her.
“That is so sweet!”
“Did I say that out loud?” Lincoln asked, causing a red-faced Lynn to nod… and finish wolfing down his sandwich.
Luan, dressed in her bunny rabbit footy pajamas sniffed and rubbed her watery eyes. “That was so…” she trailed off, tears running down her cheeks.
“I gotta run,” Lynn said, eyes darting to Lincoln and waiting for him to nod, telling her he would handle it, before she fled.
Luan still had a good three inches on Lincoln, but he easily swept her up and sat back down, holding her in his lap. “I miss Benny,” Luan whispered.
“I know, and I wish I could help,” Lincoln said, rubbing circles in her back. He’d moved away at the end of the school year and she hadn’t gotten over it yet.
“You are,” Luan assured him, wiggling deeper into his arms. “Benny may be gone, but you’re still here and you aren’t going anywhere. You’re my favorite audience.”
“And you’re my favorite comedian,” the white-haired boy assured her, “bar none.”
“Sure, you didn’t mean bare?” Luan teased with a grin.
“I never joke about breasts,” Lincoln said, “using them for cheap titillation would be wrong. I will always handle the subject with the seriousness it deserves, both right and left.”
Luan burst out laughing and Lincoln waited until she’d nearly recovered before saying, “Gozangas!” as solemnly as possible, causing her to lose it again.
Five minutes and fifteen more synonyms for the word breasts later, Luan finally had to physically stop him from continuing, accidentally burying his face in her cleavage. “Stop before I pee!’ she ordered, slowly releasing his head.
“Only if you’re feeling better,” Lincoln said, “cause I have barely begun to scratch the surface of my sweater puppy patter!”
Luan took a few deep breaths. “I am,” she said, “at least for the moment, but I’m serious, you almost made me have an accident there.”
“Small price to pay to see you smile again,” Lincoln said.
“You sweet talker, you,” Luan said. “Well I promise I wont get pissy with you this time.”
Lincoln snickered and got up, setting her down on her feet. “How do you like your eggs?”
“Fertilized,” she replied.
“Fertilized?” he repeated before getting the joke and blushing bright red.
Luan grinned. “Glad to see you are still mostly innocent.”
“Just wait until puberty gets here,” Lincoln said, flipping eggs and turning up the heat. “I’ll become a huge pervert!”
“I doubt it,” Luan said.
“You don’t think I can be perverted?” Lincoln asked, sounding a bit hurt.
“Words are my thing not-so-little-anymore Bro,” Luan replied, “and there is a big difference between honest sexuality and perversion.”
“I’m not quite getting you,” Lincoln said as he slid a plate of food in front of her and started frying another couple of eggs.
“Ever heard the term ‘beauty is in the eye of the beholder,” she said rhetorically, “well so’s perversion. Everything is perverted to someone but no matter what you do, I doubt I’ll consider it perverted because it’s you doing it and I’m absolutely sure you’re not the type of person to do ‘bad’ things. Bad in this case being things that I’d disapprove of.”
“Even me and Lynn flashing each other?” he asked as he considered that at least a little perverted himself.
“Heh,” Luan said with a chortle, “the pair of you have taken something that should be sinful and wicked and turned it into something sweet and adorable.”
“I guess I’ll just have to try harder,” Lincoln teased, making Luan laugh.
“I’ll believe it when I see it,” she said cheerfully, “By the way, great breakfast, I’ll get the dishes.”
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