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Origins	By : LaChatteNoire Category: +G through L > Invader Zim > Het- Male/Female Views: 2468 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Invader Zim, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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I’ve heard of the theory that Membrane created Dib. I’ve read stories of what happens to Dib as a result of his creation. However I have not personally found stories about that creation itself. So, here is my own creation myth.

This story is connected to absolutely nothing else I have ever written. I’m assuming the show takes place about when it aired, year 2001. Since Dib is 11 that means he was born around 1990, mid to late 1990 as far I’m concerned. That means he was conceived late 1989, early 1990. Therefore, this story begins in mid 1988. Chronological distance between page breaks in this first chapter varies, occasionally days, more often months.

When entering Membrane’s deepest thoughts, Simmons tends to be called his first name, Simon (the first name created by me). Just a note in case it gets confusing.

The characters and settings herein belong not to me, but to the illustrious Vasquez. I think he'll gladly throw the plot at me with an "UGH!"

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Chapter 1: The Idea

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Professor Membrane stood on the observation deck and gazed down at his empire. He had managed to build Membrane Labs, to make his fledgling company into a world power in the realms of science, and to begin a hit children’s TV show, all before the age of 24. Now, though, he felt something missing in his life.

Simon Simmons joined his friend and boss at the railing. He looked down as well. “A quantum for your thoughts?”

Membrane sighed. “I feel old.”

Simmons grinned. “Gee, you’ll be, what, 25 next week?”

“I still feel old. And bald.”

“There’s always the hair creams you invented for the occasion. And you’re not old, you’re just fast. Any other scientist would have earned their PhD by age 28, founded a small laboratory, and worked all their lives to see it grow to the power you’ve created. You’re a genius, you’ve created what they said couldn’t be done, what more could you need in life?”

“I want kids.”

Simmons sputtered for a minute. “What?” He grinned again. “Mem, when was the last time you got laid?”

Membrane shrugged and mumbled.

Simmons pressed himself against Membrane’s side. “What was that?”

“Six years.”

Simmons pulled away. “Well there’s your problem. If you’d like, I could fix you up…”

“No.”

“C’mon, man, you need it. Badly.”

“And yet, all the times you’ve tried to fix me up…” Membrane raised an eyebrow and let his silence speak for himself.

Simmons shrugged. “Hey, you’re hard to shop for. Can you blame me for trying to find out what you like?”

“You know what I like, Simon. I like conversation, I like intelligence, and if I can’t find that I like to be alone.”

“Yeah, what’s a guy like you wanting kids for? The first decade or so they’re too young for any kind of intelligent conversation, the next decade they turn insane and cut all ties with you, then by their third decade they’re gone for good.”

Membrane shook his head. “Not mine. My children will be different.” He spaced out.

Simmons stared over the railing into the laboratories below them, at the ground-shattering discoveries made as they spoke by scientists twice, three times as old as they were. The lie all new parents tell themselves, he thought, is that their kids will be different. It’s the only reason humans can bring themselves to keep reproducing. “You want an heir.”

“Hmm?”

Simmons looked his friend deep in the eye. “You want an heir to carry on your empire after you die.”

“No, that’s not it at all. Besides, you know I wouldn’t trust Membrane Labs to anyone other than myself.”

“Well what are you gonna do, live forever?” Simmons patted his friend’s shoulder. “Those results should be ready by now. You coming?”

Membrane nodded absently. “In a minute.”

Simmons grinned. “Right.” He left.

Professor Membrane stared back into his empire. He didn’t want to live forever, but maybe…

Just maybe…

Maybe he didn’t have to.

-----

Professor Membrane came home late to the large, lonely, empty home he owned in the suburbs. He wandered the rooms in thought then found himself in the basement lab. Perhaps…

He worked through the night and into the morning. He called in sick the next two days as he worked day and night on the hunch, the minute possibility…

After days without food or rest, the answer came. It could be done. It would be dangerous, and the only reason it wasn’t illegal was the fact that no one had thought of it yet. It could potentially kill him.

But it could be done.

-----

“You’re going to what?!”

Membrane sat on one side of the couch in his office, Simmons on the other. Membrane was in the middle of his plan when Simmons had interrupted with that outburst. “You heard me, I’m going to clone myself.”

Simmons sputtered. “But, but, why? I know you want a kid, but trust me, Mem, you have time! You have decades and decades of time! Besides, no one’s managed to clone a human before. True, we cloned a couple of monkeys, but we’re not letting the world know about that, and they weren’t exactly successful.”

Membrane leaned back. “We’ll learn from our mistakes. Besides, I figure a non-exact clone would be easier. There’s less genetic breakdown, it’s less suspicious, and I could tweak the exact genes that I want to.”

“But Mem, the human genome hasn’t been mapped, we have no clue what that’ll do!”

Membrane shrugged. “Ok, maybe not the exact genes I want, but that’s part of the mystery, isn’t it? Not knowing what you’ll create, other than it’ll be some small person?”

Simmons sighed. “You’re gonna do this no matter what I say, aren’t you?”

“I’d rather have your support in this than not.”

“Well, you have it, but only because someone needs to keep an eye on you.”

“This is about that nuclear reactor, isn’t it?”

Simmons grinned. “Why did I promise your mom I’d look after you?”

Membrane grinned. “Because she cooks.”

“That’s why!”

-----

A pair of Membrane Labs geneticists looked over the printout with the jittery exhaustion of too much caffeine. One of them snapped and let his head fall into his hands. “We’re cloning monkeys again, aren’t we?”

The other one gazed into the printout, demanding it give up its secrets. “Certainly looks like a monkey. Look at all these useless bits. Only primates have this much junk littered among their genes.”

Professor Membrane paced around the conference room, checking glances over their shoulders at the printout of his genetic code. If they couldn’t figure out whose it was, no one could and his clone would be safe. “Junk?”

“Oh yes. Look at this big hole here. It’s a large block of useless info between genes. When proteins are transcripted, this is the block that’s most often introned.”

Membrane knew that most of the human genetic code was introned but didn’t want to chance it. “Let’s not remove any of it just yet. I’m trying to create a living being here, not just a science project. Can we do it?”

The geneticist with his head on the table groaned. “Think of all the errors… Bit errors all over the code, it’ll fizzle out and die like the rest of them.”

Membrane turned to the coherent one. “What do you think? If we changed whole genes, possibly whole chromosomes, would there be as much genetic breakdown?”

“It’d be horrendous. No, the only way to prevent breakdown would be to expose the clone to it’s parent’s DNA at all times. It’d need to be carried by the one you’re cloning. Sir, this is a male, see this Y Chromosome? There’s no possible way this can work.”

Membrane ran his hand over his balding head. “So if this were a female there’d be a chance?”

“There isn’t a chance in Hell, but yes, if this were female she could carry it and it might survive.”

Membrane smiled. As long as it’s exposed to the parent’s DNA…

-----

Simmons knocked on his friend’s office door. “Mem? You in there?” He pushed it open and walked in.

Professor Membrane was sitting at his desk, head in his arms, asleep. His skin glowed green from the computer on his desk, still displaying the numbers from the latest round of tests. Simmons remembered the tests; the results were most promising, but they implied that the clone could not be grown in the lab.

Simmons smiled wanly and shook his friend awake. “Mem, wake up.”

Membrane groaned and cuddled deeper into his arms. “No.”

“Mem, this isn’t helping.”

Membrane sat up. “Simon, it can’t be done.”

Simmons pulled a chair up backwards and sat down in it the wrong way. “You’ll find a way, you always do.”

“Not this, though. I’ve tried and tried…” He sighed. “I know I can’t use a surrogate mother, the only way to prevent degradation is to expose the child to my DNA at all times. I need this to be precisely controlled and the only way I knew how has been taken from me.”

Simmons nodded. “Makes sense, actually. A child cannot grow in a glass cage.”

Membrane glared. “And what do you suggest, Oh Wise One?”

“Have you thought maybe of an artificial womb? You might be able to keep it controlled enough.”

Membrane shook his head. “No, but I don’t see how that would be any different from the lab. Besides, how am I going to make sure the child is constantly exposed to…”

Simmons gave Membrane a worried look. “You’re not thinking… Mem that could kill you.”

Membrane shook his head. “Not if I do this right.”

“Mem, is there a right way? You don’t know what this’ll do to you!”

Membrane stood up. “Sure, I do. Ok, the hormone therapy will be a bit much, but after that I’ll be fine. Trust me, Simon, I know what I’m doing.”

“Like last time?”

Membrane sighed fondly. “I’m not going to die, Simon. You know as well as I do, I’m too weird to die in some normal fashion.”

“Somehow, I never considered a man becoming pregnant in an attempt to clone himself anywhere near normal. This is exactly your style.”

Membrane sat in Simon’s chair, pressed his chest against his friend’s back. He wrapped his arms around him and spoke softly in his ear. “Don’t worry about me, Simon. I’ll be alright. That’s why you’re here, to make sure of it.”

Simon leaned into Membrane. “What if I’m not strong enough?”

Membrane nuzzled closer. “I trust you.”

Simon closed the tiny gap between them. He brushed his lips over those of his friend. Membrane gasped and pressed the brush into a kiss. Simon wrapped his arms around Membrane’s neck, poured his fear into that kiss. Membrane held him close and fell deeper and deeper…

Simon pulled away and Membrane followed for a second before giving up the contact. “Mem…”

“Simon…”

Simon reoriented his arms and leaned back into Membrane’s lanky chest. He sighed. “This isn’t just because you feel old, is it?”

Membrane played idly with Simon’s open lab coat. “No, I think I’ve wanted to do that for awhile.”

Simon grinned. “You never do anything normal, do you?”

“Of course not. Normal is too dull for the likes of us.”

-----

Simmons finished the final calculations. “Hey Mem, how you holding up?”

Membrane lay on the couch in his office, Simmons at his desk using his computer. The indignancy of it all… “Unngh.”

Simmons chuckled and got up, picked up a glass of water, and offered it to his suffering friend. “You got yourself into this. How’re you feeling?”

Membrane answered with a finger. “I just got out of surgery, Simon. I have a foreign sack of polymers inside me attached to important blood vessels. In that sack is a parasitic mass of dividing cells feeding off of me. How do you think I feel?” He snatched the glass of water but miscalculated his current lack of strength and it flew out of his fingers all over his chest.

Simmons grinned. “Somehow I think ‘Odd’ is a good term. After all, it’s not every day someone manages to knock themselves up.”

Membrane leaned back on the couch arm. “What was I thinking?”

“I believe, despite all protests to the contrary, that you were thinking about living forever.”

Membrane gave Simmons a look then turned his eye to his belly. “Not forever, not quite.” He flopped a hand onto his stomach, wincing as his fingers touched stitches, and stroked. “That’s your job, isn’t it Dib?”

End Chapter 1
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Origins