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Reviews for Fan Service

By : Mentor61
  • From inaba on June 10, 2021

    I have three points I'd like to make.
    1: this story was grate as a romance but one little fact you left vague was slightly annoying, their height, this fact left a little to much to the imagination.

    2: this setting/set up could have made a better pwp if Jan joined them sooner and guided her through oral, vag, and anal.

    3: and lastly (to me, a Size King) even your romance story could have been much better (and maybe others) if you had given a girth to his member and added another inch to his length, because of my first point readers are not sure how large six inch's is to them.

    but in the long run this was a good story, I had fun reading it and if your still active I'm sure those who have read it would love a second chapter taking place in a hotel in Hawaii.... or maybe a simple summer home where Nelani could run around in a red and white dress with a blue plushy back pack lol.


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  • From WritingDude on April 06, 2016
    Interesting story, although there are several grammar flaws and Nelani isn't that interesting of a character. Like, besides being horny for Alvin, what else stands out about her? What are her likes? Dislikes? How was her childhood? A character with only 1 trait of personality isn't interesting and it unfortunately makes her a Mary Sue. I'd suggest going back and revising it so that Nelani is a lot more interesting and the grammar problems are fixed.
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  • From megafan on August 15, 2012
    I like AXB (Alvin + Brittany) stories but this is good story :)
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  • From EzriCandy on December 07, 2010

    Please correct your disclaimer


    It does not contain one of the two required elements. Namely, the part in which you disclaim the fandom itself by NAME, not just the characters. It can be worded however you, the author, likes, provided that it is clear you are disclaiming the specificfandom, which thus INCLUDES characters, settings, and etc.


    You must disclaim the actual fandom, not the owner(s) of the fandom, or characters in the fandom. When it is a crossover fiction, all fandoms involved IN the crossover must be disclaimed as well.


    Failure to correct the disclaimer will cause your story to be hidden from public view after a week from the date of this warning, butnot deleted; you can still correct your disclaimer, which will then be unhidden again as soon as possible. Continued failure to correct the disclaimer will cause the hidden story to be deleted after 30 days of being hidden. Re-uploads of hidden stories are deleted immediately, no warning given.


    Below is a link to the Terms of Service in its entirety

    http://www.adultfanfiction.net/tos.php


    In addition, the next link listed is to the FAQ regarding disclaimers.

    http://www2.adultfanfiction.net/forum/index.php?showtopic=3560

    You can also review our news post on the topic for a complete explaination, found here:
    http://www2.adultfanfiction.net/forum/index.php/topic/17420-site-news-11-6-10/
    Please also take a few minutes to read the content guidelines.

    http://www.adultfanfiction.net/guidelines.php

    Please remove this review once your disclaimer is corrected.



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