Click Here!

Reviews for Team Alphanumeric: Mars Division

By : SSJ04Mewtwo
  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 22, 2010
    A nice little story. Not as long as the first one, but perhaps that's for the best. I doubt people would have wanted another 200+ chapter epic so soon. Nice little finisher there. And now a few random predictions of where people wound up. Baring in mind this is just me babbling.

    Eventually Tobey retired, leaving the company to Arianna. He and Violet built a house by the sea and settled down to make lots of little Brothers and sisters for Arianna. Arianna developed a line of robotic limb enhancements, like her own, for the Lexiconian and Decimalian armies, thus building McCallister industries into one of the most profitable robotics companies around.

    Carina and Arianna continued figting crime on Mars until they graduated college. Ariannna went into a semi-retirement from the team to focus on running the company. Carina eventually expanded Team Alphanumeric into a league of superheroes covering Earth, Lexicon, Decimal and Mars.

    Becky's mom spent sometime as state governor, then retired to spend her time with her husband, relaxing and reveling in the great-grandkids her grandaughter provided her.

    Dr. Two-Brains and the Ring carried on with business as usual. After all it wouldn't be any fun to just quit. The Birthday Girl eventually got over her selfish ways as she got older and eventually joined Team Alphanumeric.

    After retiring from local politics, Chuck and the Butcher eventually founded a franchise of fast food restaruants specializing in gourmet meat sandwhiches. Dr. Tubing and the girl who invented the Wordgirl look-alike battle suit, I forget her name, eventually came to work for McCalister industries as leading designers and providing tech to Team Alphanumeric.

    And on a completely random note, Huntress eventually gave up on trying to kill Caelum and married Trog. He may not exactly be the smartest, but he excels where it counts, if you know what I mean, LOL.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 22, 2010
    Well there might be room for a short epilog, show what everyone does after the battle's over. Where they go, where they end up. Entirely up to you, of course.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 19, 2010
    Time, I think, for the climax?
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 19, 2010
    Ooh, heading for the climax. Can't wait for the fireworks to really start.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 17, 2010
    Man I hope Becky and Tim don't push this heart of knowledge thing too far. Fooling around with that kind of power too long could have some nasty side effects. I like the idea of Becky and Tim needing the power to take down a tough opponant, it builds tension. But you should have at least had Caelum and Emma be be able to do some damage, this way they just look weak and they're not.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 17, 2010
    You know now that I think about it, you raise a good point. Wordgirl and Mathwhiz did defeat Chaos fairly strongly the first time. And they did say that Chaos seems different somehow this time. I wonder of Zaniah's dimension has a Chaos of it's own?
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 16, 2010
    Aw, nothing takes war to a new level like family. Bare in mind Lexicon and Decimal aren't alone. There's the Alliance as well. And of course Celia could call in her people, they're strength would be a big help. I wonder if Blizzard is from the same race as Ice? Perhaps another colony? I'm thinking Huggy might have to call in a few more favors.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 14, 2010
    So Fire and Ice are back in the game, though they're still a fair way out. You know if Arianna has a moment she could built some flight suits like her own for the three. Of course there's no telling how effective they'd be with no experience. Man this just keeps heating up.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 13, 2010
    Heh, thanks are really heating up. I wonder if all this heart of knowledge business will have a permanant effect on Becky and Tim. Don't forget the robot duplicates, they can fly too. It might be a good show of power if Chaos's forces actually managed to damage them. Just a thought.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 11, 2010
    It's alright, not every story needs to be an epic novel. A shorter story might be good in this case. Just one thing, Is there any chance of Tobey and his father having some sort of reconcilliation or is their relationship too far gone. And you know Warp could just go inside the tanks, right?
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 10, 2010
    Heh, wow it feels so weird actually seeing some of my guys in action. Originally I was unsure about Celia, I normally imagine her a bit older, like ten or eleven, but this is good. Blizzard has a fair point, they just met. They're might be some playful jabbing, but it is way to early to be thinking about anything romantic.

    Oh and, Chill? You really went there?
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 10, 2010
    Heh, nice. Looks like the three are going to fit right in. Yeah getting on Chaos's nerves is rarely a good idea.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 06, 2010
    It may be just me, but I'm having trouble getting used to hearing Huggy actually talk. Still it is nice to see him in action again. You make a fair point in this chapter. Carina and Arianna may be trying to make a name for themselves but the two of them alone can't handle this kind of power, they need help.

    Of course they can't exactly depend on their parents with Chaos on Earth, but perhaps there's another way. Huggy was a legendary pilot in his day. So I assume he's been around. In all his travels he's bound to have come across other worlds with what we would could super heroes on them, maybe even made some friends.

    How about this, after seeing Arianna and Carina pushed to her limits, Huggy gets in contact with some old friends from his adeventuring days. They're have got to be teenagers from other races with power out there somewhere. Maybe a few of them could get together with Carina and Arianna and help them out? After all, fighting crime in a city is one thing, taking out an army or arms dealers is another matter. I've got a few ideas here that you could use, let me know if you want to hear any of them.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 05, 2010
    Wow this is really ramping up. Let's just hope they don't try to dance through the force field. Heh, I wonder if Becky will ever live that one down.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Max Jordan on September 02, 2010
    Kinda weird hearing Huggy speak, but it must be easier to write him that way. Um one thing though. I can understand that they'd want to get rid of the guns. But local law enforcement might look down on them casually destroying evidence like that.
    Report Review

T.O.S. | Content Guidelines | DMCA Info | F.A.Q. | Facebook | Tumblr | Abuse | Support | Contact | Donate

Click Here!