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Reviews for Team Alphanumeric

By : SSJ04Mewtwo

From ANON - MaxJ1800 on April 01, 2009
It's ok, like I said it fit the situation. Oh yeah, that was classic. And Becky thought she had her hands full before. Ooh, energy monster, this should be fun. Just remember, static electricity is NOT friendly to hair dos. Oh quick tip. Becky may be a walking dictionary, but not everyone else is. You might want to lighten up on the Skater Lingo, or at least provide a few definitions.
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 31, 2009
Hee, oh that was fun. The new battle cry really fits. Though I question the wisdom of shouting it at night, in a house full of sleeping people and a sleeping baby in the same room. Hoboken Diamond? Man, talk about random. Thought you get the idea Carina was just trying to be part of the conversation. Don't worry about TJ. He learn to accept it in time, he just needs a while to adjust.

Maybe Carina could help out? TJ could get roped into helping with the baby sitting and a cute little baby is hard for ANYONE to pass up. I wonder if Carina will start trying to walk first, or if she'll just go straight to flying and learn how to walk later. Heh, I can just see Mrs. Botsford casually walking down the hallway with an armload of laundry, humming to herself. Only to look up, shriek and duck ans Carina zooms past. Man that such potential for comedy.
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 30, 2009
You could just have hime get disable somehow, or just so shocked by what he's seeing that he's stunned. Heh, it'd hilarious if the Huntress came along making osme kinda announcement that she was gonna grab Math Which, and Bam, out of nowhere she gets sucked into the middle of the brawl.

I don't think we should get rid of Two-Brains. He's one of the best villains on the show. Without him, it just wouldn't be the same. And you know most of the time Two-Brains isn't really that nuts. It's only when the mouse brain really gets going that he REALLY gets out of control. In a way, Two-Brains is almost like an addict himself, though mostly the mouse side.

Heh, Jeff REALLY needs to find a hobby, or a sense of direction.
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 30, 2009
I like the new one. It takes a bit longer, but it lets each one represent themselves as an individual before they represent themselves as a team. Ok, I have to say it, CAT FIGHT! Seriously, we need a knock down, drag out between Grann mady, Lady Redundant Woman, Phantasma and Wordgirl, quick. I can see Math Whiz, just standing there, speechless.

Speaking of missing out on things, what happened to the narrator? I know it's your story, be he's a character in his own right on the show. Alas, poor huggy, gone from superhero sidekick to resident babysitter.

I'm not sure I like the idea of the whole drug war thing. Even with the whole slightly darker tone of your series, it just doesn't seem right for Wordgirl to go there. Remember, drug addiction has long lasting consequences that you'll have to deal with later on down the line. You know, I know could see Mr. Big admitting that Big Mama has gone too far and somehow sabotaging the drugs, or paying someone to craft an antidote.

On another note, this is now the thirtieth review for this fanfic. Although all but two of them are from me. I'n not sure if that's wonderful, or just a bit scary.
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 27, 2009
Heh, nice commentary on the quality of the milk, let's hope her throwing arm isn't TOO good, yet, we wouldn't want any broken windows. It's kinda fitting that Two-Brains sohuld be the main focus for a while. They said on the show that he considers himself to be Wordgirl's top enemy.

Oh man, what a scene. Wordgirl trying to fight off a suped up Mouse Robot, with her mom trying to jack off in the background? Can you say distracting? Typically babies ususally stick to basic stuff like mama or dada for their first words. But in Carina's case it could be just about anything. Fun fact: In the comic strip Baby Blues, Hammie McPherson's first words were yelling dump truck at the top of his voice.
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 26, 2009
It's up to you, the Bounty Huntress seems like a decent idea. Somehow I don't think Tobey will ever fully get over Wordgirl. And I highly doubt he'll ever be normal. If Carina is anything like her mother, than she should be talking fairly soon. And why do I get the feeling that once she does, no one will be able to shut her up?
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 22, 2009
Heh, 41 chapters, yeah they really got that Wordgirl section up fast. I'm not sure if the Borg route is the way to go, it's kinda being over used in a lot of plots. But it's up to you. I wouldn't worry aobut TJ, he just needs time to adjust. Oh and Tobey is rigbt about anything. Wordgirl would never seriously injure a living being, that's just not here style. Thought I'm sure she can find some creative ways to make his life miserable, Tobey's mother for instance?
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 20, 2009
Sorry, I got a little distracted. I'll just run down a few points form the last two chapters.

1: Breast feeding in public is just fine, but Becky might have chosen a better spot than in front of her whole family.

2: Heh, I can just see Carina zooming around the house, dive bombing people.

3: Big mama is a nice touch, I'd be scared of her, too. But this whole robot enforcer thing is seriously old school. Doesn't Big Mama watch movies? I mean, I can see this whole thing going south from here.

4: I gotta say Chuck and the Butcher make a good pair. I mean it does make sense, if you think about it.

5: Nice touch, with Tobey getting a little payback on two-brains.

6: I've noticed that there are more than one kind of villain on Wordgirl. If you listen to her talk to Chuck, the Butcher or Two-Brains, it almost seems like a casual relationship. Not like Mr. Big, or Granny May, who are anything but social.

7: Do I sense a major guilt trip in Tobey's future?
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 13, 2009
Excellent, a great ending. Is this the end of Team Alphanumeric, or will there be more to come in the future?
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 11, 2009
This is really getting good. But don't get so caught up in the excitement that you start leaving out details. One minute you have them fighting soldiers, then they're just suddenly in Wordgirl's ship? A little extra detail would fit in nicely right there.
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 10, 2009
Pretty goood so far. Though I'd easy off on the lyrics, they can work if done right, but if done wrong they can really get in the way of the story telling. Caelum? Where'd that come from?
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From ANON - Anon on March 09, 2009
I'll email you later. Carina is either a Galaxy in the milky way, Decimal and Lexicon maybe? It's also a cute nickname for Cara. Oh and there was a Cyclone named Carina at one point? Hinting at the future, maybe?
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 07, 2009
I didn't say she couldn't start out as an evil clone. I just thought it would be good for her to become more than that over time.

As for Names, what do you think of Emma? And yes, there's a literary referance in there.

Oh this review page is getting a bit crowded and this isn't really what it's meant for. We should probably find somewhere to dicuss things. Maybe email, or do you do IRC?
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 06, 2009
Heh, going good so far. I wonder if Becky has the slightest clue that her world is about to completely loopy. As opposed to the mildly loopy it is rigbt now.
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From ANON - MaxJ1800 on March 04, 2009
yes, but she also thought they all left. And was plainly unaware of the fact that they were still on Eartch effectively babysitting her. Naturally she would be more than a little pissed. And Becky's pregnancy must be affecting her thinking. She didn't even consider trying to contact the Predicate Guard and ordering them to help math Whiz. On that note, I pitty Guardian. Here's this big tough soldier, used to being in command, and he's taking orders from a teenage girl and a pregnant one at that.

As for the whole scorched Earth idea, I'm not sure how I feel about that. I mean the Predicate Guard isn't just sitting on their hands. There have to be more of them out there. Can't Guardian call for backup? Oh and if Becky does put them to use, make sure she puts her foot down about no lethal weapons unless absolutely neccesary. Not that Guardian would dare try to argue.

As for Weapon X2, it's up to you if you want to bring him back. But a piece of advice, for X2 and any possible X3. Don't just have this be evil clone syndrome. Don't just have them be evil copies of Becky and Tim. You could have them be that at the beginning.

But over time, have them grow and change. Maybe have them begin to develop personalities of their own and even name themselves. And dare I say it, have them start to develop feelings for each other? Like maybe at some point the Wordgirl clone sees the baby and reacts to it strangely. Maybe some maternal instict from Becky's DNA kicks in and she almost starts to develop feelings of love for it. She wouldn't understand these of course and they confuse her to no end, but they'd be there.

As for the baby. Of course the choice is yours, but remember you said Lexicon basically runs on a matriarchy. But boy or girl, rember this kid's parentage. When the time comes, he or she is gonna be a powerhouse that makes their parents pale in comparison.

Actually that brings me to the point. Have you considered how much power this kid is going to have when it's born? It might not be a good idea to dump a massively powered baby right into Becky and Tim's lap. Becky has enough to deal with, she doesn't need to try to keep up with a flying baby, too.

I think you should consider going the Superman route. Have the baby show little or no powers at first, outside of Becky's word power and Tim's math skills. And as the kid grows, the powers begin to develope more and more.

Come to thnk of it, they never DID say how much powers Becky had as a kid. All we know is the Botsfords found a three year old Becky on their doorstep, reading the newspaper. So she clearly had her word powers from the start. But we don't know when she started to develop her other powers.

I can imagine a sevn or eight year old Becky freaking out when she helps her mom with the cleaning and accidentilly power lifts the couch. For that matter how long has she been able to understand Bob? I think maybe she always could. But Bob stayed silent for a long itme, prefering to play the silent guardian.

Bob noticed Becky's developing powers and decided that the time had come to approach her. She was probably more than a little caught off guard by this, but it had to be done. Bob showed her the crashed ship and explained her heritage. He explained about her powers and helped her practice them. And in time, Becky decided that she wanted to put those powers to use.

Wow, did I get off topic. Anyway all I'm saying is it might be the best idea to give the kid tons of super powers righat at the start.

Oh, bt the way, I can't help but thinking that Wordgirl's uniform looks like some kind of space suit. Like she found some kind of Lexiconian suit in the ship and decided it'd make a neat super hero costume.
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