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Reviews for Dexter is Mandarks

By : CrystalDragonred
  • From ANON - nothing on April 22, 2013
    so this is a nice idea. mandark and dexter is one of my favorite pairings, but you just don't see it to often. but there are some flaws.
    i believe the age is incorrect. not to say morally wrong (because that would imply that i have/care for morals), but in the sense that puberty would either have already began or about to begin. a 14 year old with a 10" cock? possible but unlikely.
    secondly, i could totally see mandark being involved in SM, but i regret to say this story did not carry that over well. a subject such as this needs a good background knowledge to make it believable.
    and thirdly, and most importantly, this story needs to be grammar checked and spell check. be sure before posting in the future to alpha check [you reread it] and beta check it [have someone else reread it].
    if you continue, good luck.
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  • From ANON - Anon on August 26, 2012
    who???
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  • From ScarletSnow on March 31, 2010
    I couldn't get through the first paragraph. You really need to spell check your stuff before you post it. I understand if you write it all in a rush and don't fix anything as you go, but you need to run a spell check or you need to sit down and proof read your own work. Have someone do it for you if you can't stand to read your own work. Small mistakes like 'candel' instead of 'candle' are what make the difference to your readers. If they can't easily make sense of what you're trying to convey then they won't enjoy your story.

    For instance another author wrote 'beret' which is a visor-less usually woolen cap with a tight headband and a soft full flat top, when they intended to write 'barrette' a clip or bar for holding hair in place. So you can see the confusion caused when the beret is found with hair stuck in it and is pocketed for later. You don't realize until half way through the story that the author meant a barrette.

    If you don't understand why some words are wrong, use a dictionary to look them up and see if they are really what you are meaning to convey. No one is going to complain if you actually take the time to proofread your work and double-check your vocabulary. I use http://www.merriam-webster.com/ as my dictionary when I'm writing, as I can quickly find what I'm looking for with a few quick clicks.

    Just remember that writing is a process. Editing is a vital part of the writing process and should never be overlooked. Good luck with your future stories.
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  • From NothingInBlood on August 19, 2008
    don't leave me hanging!


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  • From on February 13, 2008
    The story isn't bad actually. I like the story elements and plot, however you definately need help with your sentence structures and the way you tell the actual story. When I could read it (spell check!!), I couldn't help but get slightly bored: it came off more like I reading a report and a task than actually being entertained and wanting to read more.

    And don't get me wrong: I'm no where NEAR the best speller on the planet, but some of those words, you just had no excuse. Use a spell checker to help you with your story. Some of the sentences where hard to read and understand because of it.

    If you want and/or need help with your story, just ask. I don't write crap XD but I know a great friend that does. (If you want to look her up on your own, her name is Kamirine. She was nice enough to write a story for me so I wouldn't doubt she would help you if you wanted it.)
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  • From Ik3dA on January 25, 2008
    why do I feel like it's DeeDee???? o_O
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  • From Vindaloo on December 07, 2007
    Spellcheck is your friend.
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