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Reviews for In Bai Shan

By : Gunwild
  • From ANON - snake on August 01, 2008
    omg that was priceless :)
    toph just seemed so inocent hehe
    good job
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  • From Genereaver on July 21, 2008
    This is a great story, and much more well-written than I'd ever expected to find on this site. Thanks for spending time on /co/, so I could discover your work. Something in your last author's note worried me, though: "It is SO much easier to write about a show when it’s on the air to inspire you..."
    Now that the show has ended, will you still be finishing up this story? I'd like to see it have a nice conclusion, especially because it involves my favorite character getting what she wants.

    I can't really criticize anything, having little experience reading this type of story (and none at all writing it), but I'd like to say that you've handled the age differences very well, up to and including that they both acknowledge it. It's far too easy to imagine a scenario where a man takes advantage of a young girl's inexperience, and you completely avoided that route.
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  • From ANON - Killed 2 Death on July 13, 2008
    Hey...still no update. I understand if you don't want to write it anymore, but please upload something stating that.
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  • From ANON - soup on July 12, 2008
    am so stoned rigt now but its a ggood story.
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  • From ANON - inside on July 12, 2008
    Damn, that was a good read.
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  • From ANON - Mountain Dew on July 06, 2008
    Holy crap, I can't believe that there's a story this good out there that I didn't know about.
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  • From ANON - Ricky Hatton on June 28, 2008
    great story.
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  • From ANON - Mike Tyson on June 26, 2008
    Hot damn this is good.
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  • From ANON - kataang69 on June 26, 2008
    love this story!!! one of my favs! plz update!!!!!
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  • From TheColeTrain on June 21, 2008
    One key aspect that I like about your writing style is that it’s never monotonous, even after reading this for what feels like my seventh time, I always feel a strong sense of nostalgia. So in short reading a new chapter of your story feels like opening a bottle of champagne. That’s the highest complement that I can pay anyone.
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  • From ANON - Big Ralf on June 21, 2008
    This piece of fanfiction is a perfect blend of story, character, and sex with one never over shadowing the other. Seriously if this site only had more authors like you.
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  • From on June 20, 2008
    Wow, I can't believe how great a writer you are! I'm surprised to see Zuko being the submissive one when it comes to sex--I would've figured that, with his upbringing, he'd be more willing to take control.

    Also, your character dialogues are fantastic. I almost feel like I'm reading something that was copied straight out of an Avatar episode--albeit a late-night one :P If you ever get bored with writing 'dirty' fanfiction (though I've yet to see anything remotely 'dirty' anywhere in this story--your sex scenes are written beautifully!), you should try writing a regular Tokka fanfic :)

    Thank you for writing this story, and please, update soon!
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  • From Datalaughing on June 18, 2008
    I am really loving this. The Sokka/Toph relationship that carried over from the first story is beautifully done, and I can't wait for the Aang/Katara stuff that the description promises. The story is also intruiging. I just can't wait to find out what their evil plan is. You must write more! I'm afraid I have to insist. More chapters are required.
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  • From TayBear on June 14, 2008
    Could you please update this? I'm dying to know what happens next!
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  • From ANON - Soap Mctarvish on June 10, 2008
    Now this is something to look forward to in the future.
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